Chapter 22 Rosalie
ROSALIE
Ihadn’t messaged Ethan back like I promised I would. The day got so busy that I didn’t have a chance to. I had to do a photoshoot and an interview before the concert, but today, I was free.
“I’ll be back,” Anson said tightly as he kissed me. “I don’t want to leave you again.”
“I’m fine. Ryder and Trent are here,” I said. “They’re ordering pizza. We’re going to just hang out. I know you have to see this band. They sound incredible.”
He sighed, “They do. I’ll probably offer them rep, but damn. I want to be here with you.”
“I’ll be right here when you get back.” I kissed him.
“You going to talk to E?” he asked softly as he held me.
“I… I don’t know. Is there a point?”
“Of course. Cole. Ellis, baby.”
“Actually, he wants to meet up after my show in Chicago on the first night. I gave him a ticket for the show.” I winced, wondering what he’d say.
“OK.” He nodded, seemingly unaffected. “Do Evan and Klaus know?”
“I told Evan earlier. He said he was OK with it. Klaus seemed fine too, but it feels… wrong.”
“You can be friends with him, LeeLee. I won’t be mad. I just don’t want us dragged into any of their bullshit. We need to come to some kind of resolution at some point because of Ellis and Cole.”
“I know.” I frowned. “It’s just weird talking to him. It makes me feel…”
“It’s OK to feel.” He brushed his lips against mine. “Just be a good girl for me, baby. If things progress, we need to know about it.”
“I-I don’t think it will. It’s not like that,” I said, my cheeks heating as a memory of Ethan being buried inside me flashed through my head. Ethan had always been so sweet in bed. Soft kisses. Gentle touches. He always held me like he thought I might break.
“OK.” He kissed me again. “Communication, though. Don’t hold back. Promise.”
“I promise.”
He kissed me again, and I fell into it easily. Evan and Klaus had both told me they would do whatever I wanted, but I had to really think things through because it would change a lot, especially since Ethan would learn that Evan was Fox.
“Hell, LeeLee, I want to strip you naked and fuck you dirty, but I’m going to be late.”
“Then hurry back to me so you can.”
“You got it, baby.” He kissed me once more before groaning and pulling away.
I chuckled at him as he closed his eyes and steadied his breathing. It was obvious that he was hard because the bulge in his pants wasn’t something one could ignore.
He gave me a playful smile and wink when he saw me looking.
“Dirty girl. You’re making it impossible for me to leave.”
“Go so you can come back sooner,” I said with a laugh.
He grinned and left me alone in my room in the suite. I knew Trent and Ryder were watching sports on TV, so I didn’t want to interfere. We might watch a movie later, or I might just sleep.
I crawled into bed and grabbed my phone, deciding to message Ethan. I knew Klaus had a dinner meeting tonight, and Evan was on a deadline. Ellie was already sleeping, so I had nothing unless I wanted to go out to the living room and listen as Ryder and Trent yell at the TV.
I nervously pulled up Ethan’s phone number and decided I’d call, hoping he was alone.
The phone rang five times, and I was just about to hang up, when his deep voice came over the line.
“Hey,” he said, his deep rumbling sending goosebumps across my skin. “Sorry.”
I could hear people talking in the background.
“Is it a bad time?” I asked, wincing.
“No. No, it’s fine. We were just hanging out with the kings.”
“Oh, I don’t mean to intrude. I can call back tomorrow—”
“No,” he said quickly. “No, I want to talk. I can talk. It’s not a big deal.”
“E, man, come on. We’re going to crack open that new bottle.” Cole’s voice sounded out, and my heart thudded hard.
“Uh, nah. I’m busy.”
“Who the fuck are you talking to? We’re all here.”
“Don’t worry about it, man.”
“I am worried about it. Who the fuck is it?”
“My friend. Knock it off. Stop. Cole, I’ll punch you. I will. Back off.”
There was scuffling in the background for a moment before Cole’s voice came on the line.
“Emily? Who the fuck is Emily? Hey, who the fuck are you? Why are you calling E this late? You’re that bitch from Mayfair, aren’t you?”
I said nothing, my voice frozen in my throat.
“Hello? You speak, bitch?”
I disconnected the call, my pulse pounding in my ears. I flopped back on my bed, nausea washing over me.
I hadn’t spoken to Cole in so long. Not since he fucked me in the bathroom at the club. The night we made Ellis.
My stomach twisted at the blurry memory.
He’d been crying the entire time. I’d been crying. Then we’d gotten angry with one another.
It had been a disaster.
He was definitely still Cole. Still overbearing. Maybe even worse. Ethan must have saved my name as another girl’s name to throw him off. At least Ethan tried to keep our communications a secret. I did appreciate that.
My phone buzzed, Ethan’s name on the screen. I was too scared to answer, so I didn’t because I didn’t know if it would be Cole.
It buzzed again with a message.
Ethan: Hey, it’s me. I’m sorry about him. He drank a lot tonight, and you know how he can be. I’d really like to talk if you still want to.
I bit my bottom lip before I called him back.
He answered on the first ring.
“I’m so sorry,” he said the moment he picked up.
“It’s fine. I know how he is. I just don’t want him to know we’re talking.”
“I understand. I don’t want him to know either. Time and distance don’t change some people.” He let out a soft laugh. It was quieter wherever he was now.
“I’m in my room. Told the guys I needed to take this call.”
“Emily.” I laughed softly. “Is that who I am?”
He chuckled. “Yeah. One of the researchers at the lab is named Emily. They’ve heard me talk about her before. She’s incompetent as hell, so they’ll hopefully just think I’m helping her. Cole was too wasted to realize it. Had to slap him around to get my phone back.”
I winced at that.
“I don’t want to be an inconvenience. Seriously—”
“You will never be that to me,” he said softly. “It’s good to hear from you.”
“I, um, yesterday got so busy. I had all this stuff to do—”
“Rosalie,” he laughed. “It’s OK. You don’t need to explain anything to me. We’re friends. I get it. Yesterday was busy for me too, so it’s a good thing it worked out the way it did.”
I relaxed at that.
“I feel better,” I admitted.
“Good. So, what’s up?”
“Nothing.” I settled back against my bed. “Ani is out scouting a new band. Trent and Ryder are here, keeping watch. I should be sleeping, but it’s hard with all this stuff going on. Has me on edge.”
“Hearing about it in the news isn’t fun. I wish there was something I could do.”
“Just talking helps,” I said. “I was actually thinking about you.”
“Yeah?” he laughed softly, the sound sending flurries of butterflies through my stomach. “I’m honored. You’re kind of a big deal, sweetheart.”
My heart clenched at the use of the old nickname. Ethan didn’t sound like the guy I left behind. Who left me behind. This Ethan sounded so put-together. So confident. So… good.
It dawned on me that he was a completely different person, and that I didn’t know him at all.
Was that what time did to people? Just made them strangers? Ethan and I had been through so much together. He’d almost died for me once upon a time.
“I’m glad you reached out,” I murmured, focusing on the call. “I-I was actually going to reach out to you, but you beat me to it.”
“Guess that’s fate, huh?”
“Guess so.” I bit my bottom lip for a moment. “Um, can I ask you a question?”
“Ask me anything. I’m an open book.”
I smiled at that. Ethan was always easy to talk to.
“How is Cole these days? Really.”
“Really?” He sighed. “He’s… Cole, you know? Not much has changed. Little crazier, I suppose. Shorter fuse. He talks about you often, so if you’re wondering if he ever forgot about you, the answer is no.”
I wiped quickly at my eyes. “I wasn’t wondering.”
He was quiet for a moment. “Liar. Respectfully, Rosalie.”
I laughed at that.
“If you want to talk to him, his number is still the same. I’m sure he’d love to hear from you,” he said gently.
I said nothing as I wiped quickly at my eyes, but the damn tears kept coming. Cole had left me to be with Enzo and his wife. I couldn’t forgive it as much as I tried, the years be damned, but he was Ellis’s dad, and she was asking about him.
Did I hate Cole?
Maybe a little.
Or a lot.
It was a confusing feeling that I had spent the last few years trying to figure out. All I knew was that I was still mad and hurt.
“Is everything OK? With you and… Evan? Are you happy?”
“I’m happy,” I whispered. “I love Evan with everything I am. He’s my soulmate.”
“I thought Fox was your soulmate,” he said, his voice rough. “But I am glad you found someone. You deserve your happiness.”
“Fox is… gone. I have Evan now, and I wouldn’t change it for anything.”
“Wow,” he murmured, clearing his throat. “Evan must really be something to take the place of Fox. I’d really like to meet him someday.”
“He’s not Fox’s replacement. He’s… just Evan. I cannot compare the two, but he is the one I have and the one I want. W-We’re trying for a baby.”
Ethan was quiet for a long time. “Uh, well, I hope you guys get everything you want. I want that for you both.”
“Thank you,” I whispered, my heart aching. I wanted more than anything to tell him Evan was Fox. That Cole had a daughter. That I missed…
Damnit.
I breathed out.
“Enough about all that. What’s going on with your music? I really liked that song you and Anson did on the livestream. I didn’t realize he played violin like that. I knew he played, but that was insane. It was pretty incredible.”
“Yeah. Yeah, he plays. He’s really good. We weren’t even ready to release that song, but figured it might take the focus off all this other stuff.”
“I get it. But what’s next? Maybe a break? Seems like you’ve been going non-stop for almost five years now.”
“I have.” I steadied myself. “I told Ani I need a break. After we finish off the European tour, I’m going to take one.
I have a clothing collab with Jamie coming out, as well as a cosmetics and perfume line.
I’m writing music for Fabian’s new movie and doing another video with him.
And then there’s Evan’s movie. I’m doing music for that.
I’ll take a break from touring and work slowly on my new album. Ani seems like he needs a break, too.”
“Damn, you really are busy,” he said with a little chuckle. “That’s not what I meant when I said take a break. Little busy bee.”
I smiled at that. “I feel like I want to do so much, but don’t have the time.”
“I feel you there. All I do is work too. It’s nice to relax. You should try it.”
I laughed. “I’ll think about it.”
“Good.” I could hear the smile in his voice.
“I’m looking forward to seeing you in Chicago,” he continued.
“I might be a little late and might have security with me,” I said, wincing.
“I figured. It’s cool. But just so you know, if you’re with me, you’re safe. Nothing has changed in that respect.”
“I know,” I murmured. “I’d invite you backstage, but it can get really hectic with fans. We can meet up after and maybe get a late-night pizza. It’s been so long since I’ve had anything from Giodi’s.”
“I love that place,” he said, chuckling again. “I’m definitely game for that. They have a build-your-own-pie bar now.”
“Ooh, that sounds incredible.” I rubbed my stomach, wondering if we had any takeout left.
“You’re hungry,” he said, laughing. “If you were closer, I’d bring you pizza right now. We could sit outside and stare at the stars and talk about life.”
I smiled at that. “Maybe we can when I see you.”
“Don’t tease me,” he said, that playful sound in his voice. He was just so different, yet he was the same. This Ethan was happy. Healthy. Healed. He was the Ethan I hadn’t met yet.
“I don’t tease,” I replied. “I follow through.”
He laughed again. “Then I look forward to the follow-through.” He paused for a minute. “Can I ask you something?”
“Yes. Of course.”
“That song you played in Boston. All I Needed was You. Was that about you and me?”
I licked my lips. “Yeah. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. It’s a good song. It’s actually one of the reasons I wanted to reach out to you.
To let you know that I’m not that guy anymore.
I didn’t want your last memories of me to be that scared kid who was afraid to be touched and to touch.
The addict. The waste who couldn’t get his shit together.
I guess I just wanted to reintroduce myself. ”
“I never thought you were a waste, Ethan—”
There was a loud bang, and Ethan swore softly.
“E, you prick fuck, get down here! Hang up with that bitch! She’s a biter! Levin fucking said she uses her teeth. He fucked her with Fallon in high school!” Cole’s voice called out.
“No, he didn’t,” Ethan shot back. “And get the fuck out of here. I said I’d be down later.”
“Give me the damn phone, pretty boy. I’ll handle her for you. May as well share the fucking love, right?”
There was some rustling and grunting, so I assumed they were fighting.
Knowing Cole would likely get the phone, I decided to hang up to avoid dealing with him. When it was time for me to talk to him, I’d call him directly.
I disconnected the call and rubbed my eyes before thumbing out a message to Ethan.
Rosalie: Thanks for the chat. It was nice. Talk soon, OK?
I snuggled down in my bed, wondering what the hell my next steps even were and what I was doing with Ethan.
Could I be friends with him when he still made butterflies burst to life?
Likely not, but I wanted him in my life. If I was uncertain before, I was definitely on the side of yes now. Hearing how good he sounded let me know he was in a different spot in his life, like I was.
“I’ll just… see how things go in Chicago,” I murmured to myself as I closed my eyes. “Then…”
I didn’t finish the thought because it was too terrifying.