41. Grayson
41
GRAYSON
“ G rayson.”
“Mmmph.” I roll away from the voice. It’s too early to get up yet. Whatever the hell Logan wants can wait another couple of hours.
“Grayson,” the voice repeats, a small hand coming to rest on my shoulder and giving it a quick squeeze. A little more awake now, I realize the voice isn’t Logan’s. It’s too feminine. Too sweet.
My eyes snap open, and I blink up into Riley’s face.
“Sorry,” she whispers. “I thought you might want to catch a few hours’ sleep in your own bed.”
Her words struggle to compute through the fog in my head until I turn, noting the sleeping girl spread out over ninety percent of the bed, leaving me with a narrow strip to sleep on. Damn, I’m lucky I didn’t fall on the floor.
“What time is it?” I ask, voice rough and scratchy as I swipe a hand through my hair, likely mussing it up.
“Early, still.”
“Sorry. She didn’t want to sleep alone last night.”
“You don’t need to explain,” she murmurs. “Thank you for staying with her.”
Like I would have left her. I’d told Aurora I’d go get her mom, but she refused to let me leave the bed. I’d planned to only stay until she fell asleep, but honestly, I’m not sure which of us passed out first—her or me. The events of the past few days wiped me out.
“Mommy,” Aurora’s sleepy voice interrupts, her eyes still closed.
“Shh, baby, go back to sleep,” Riley soothes, reaching over me to stroke the back of Aurora’s head. I love watching these private moments between them. The way Riley cares for her daughter. The way Aurora looks at her mom. It’s clear that Riley is that girl’s entire world. She looks up to her in a way I never remember worshiping my dad. He was always this imposing figure. I felt like I had to impress him, and he always fell a little short.
That’s not how it is with Riley and Aurora. Riley praises every single one of her achievements, even if it’s as simple as drawing a stick figure or eating her peas. Even when Aurora gets a word wrong or mispronounces it, she isn’t chastised or ridiculed. Riley simply offers her a soft smile for her effort before correcting her.
Watching them together… puts everything into perspective. It makes me realize I never had my father’s love. I see now that he never truly loved me. I was a possession, an extension of him. I was never my own person, never just Grayson, never his son.
Not the way that Aurora is Riley’s daughter or how she’s effortlessly becoming ours .
Becoming mine , and I’m not talking in a half-sister kinda way. I mean fucking mine. Mine to care for. Mine to protect. Mine to love.
Looking at her, I don’t see a sister nearly twenty years younger than me. I see a little girl who I fell in love with the second I learned of her existence. A bright, bubbly child who lights up when I walk through the door after a long day at work and classes. A kid who can make me crack a smile at the stupidest of things and has suckered me into watching a plethora of Disney movies.
I see a little girl who I want to watch grow up. Who I want to comfort when she has her heart broken for the first time. I want to help her with her homework when she’s stuck and scare off every adolescent male because none of them are fucking good enough for her. I want to worry about her when she breaks curfew, and sit up waiting until she gets home after prom.
I feel myself coming undone with every minute spent in Aurora’s presence.
She’s… everything.
“Sleep with me, Mommy.”
Aurora’s sweet voice brings me back to the here and now, and I move to get up so Riley can climb in beside her daughter. Except, as soon as I shift, Aurora’s hand snaps out to fist my top. “No,” she complains sleepily. “Bed cuddles.”
Smothering a silent laugh, Riley attempts to explain, “Baby, Grayson needs to go sleep in his own bed.”
Eyes still closed, Aurora shakes her head, lips pulled down in a frown as she rubs her face against the pillow. Her hand tightens on my top. It’s clear I’m not going anywhere. Remaining where I am, I arch an eyebrow at Riley. Well, what are you going to do now?
Rolling her eyes at me, she moves to the other side of the bed and slips beneath the cover. This bed is not made to fit the three of us, meaning we’re all squished onto it, and Riley and I end up looking at each other over Aurora’s head. Our faces are so close that I can see the light dusting of freckles along the bridge of her nose, Aurora’s restful breaths the only sound as we stare at one another.
Long seconds pass, but for once, when Riley and I are in the same room, it’s not strung tight with tension. It’s calm. Peaceful. Like how it is when I’m inside her and everything wrong in my life slots into place. For that blissful moment, all is right in the world.
This moment is the calm after the storm.
It’s a tranquility I can see myself enjoying for the rest of my life.
“She’s perfect,” I tell Riley, gaze dropping to the little girl snuggled between us. I’ve thought that plenty of times over the past couple of weeks that we’ve had Aurora, yet I don’t think I’ve ever said the words aloud. Not to Riley.
Riley’s smile is soft and endearing as she glances down at her daughter. “Yeah, she is.”
“I don’t think her time spent with my dad has harmed her in any way.”
Riley’s lips flatten, but relief shines in her eyes. “You think so? I mean, she seems to be doing okay. Logan said they talked, and it sounded like Bertram mostly ignored her.” She sighs, staring down at her daughter with concern. “I hope that’s the case but I haven’t wanted to ask her outright in case it upsets her or triggers something.”
“Nah, I think there would be signs if he had traumatized her in some way. Other than being a little shy around one of us initially, which is understandable, she has adapted to being here really well.”
Sinking deeper into her pillow, Riley smiles down at her daughter.
“What about you?” she asks somewhat hesitantly.
“I want her here, Riley.” I infuse my words with sincerity, hoping she hears what I’m saying—believes it. “She’s family. Blood. But even if she wasn’t, she’s your daughter, which means I want to know everything about her.”
She chews on her bottom lip, those fathomless green-brown eyes holding me captive and slowly reeling me in. Not that I’m putting up a fight. Not anymore. Not when it comes to her.
“I don’t know how to explain to her…” She trails off, but she doesn’t need to finish that sentence. I understand.
She doesn’t know how to explain to her daughter that I’m her brother. But I’m also so much more than that.
Her arm stretches across the distance between us, fingers tangling with mine on top of the bedsheets. “I want her to know. Want you both to have that relationship, regardless of whatever you may be to me. Whatever else you may be to her.”
Wriggling closer, I eliminate any spare space until Aurora is a warm body pressed against us, and I can lift my hand to rest it on the side of Riley’s throat. I give it a light squeeze. “ Whatever you may be to me is everything. Whatever else I may be to her is whatever she needs. We’re done dancing around this, Riley. You, me, Royce, Logan, and this little girl… we aren’t an eventuality because we’re already happening. We are. We always will be .”
Her cheeks are tinged pink, her lips pressed flat to smother the smile I know she’s struggling not to let loose. “When things are going good, it’s hard for me to believe it will last.”
“Well, this is forever, so get used to it.”
“So possessive,” she mumbles—a deflection.
“Damn right.” My chest vibrates with the confirmation. “You’re ours.” I practically snarl the words. “ She’s ours.”
“You realize that means you’re all mine?”
My eyes flare, and I hiss, “Say that again.”
I swear, the green in her eyes shimmers. “You’re mine,” she repeats.
In the next moment, I’m stretching over Aurora, careful to keep my weight off her as my lips hover inches above Riley’s. “Say it again.”
“You’re mine.” Her declaration tastes so fucking sweet as I bring my lips to hers.
I can’t claim her the way my blood is urging me to do, and instead of deepening the kiss, I’m forced to pull back.
“You can bet your fucking ass I’m yours.”
We must doze off at some point. When I next open my eyes, curious dark ones eerily similar to mine stare back at me. A tiny finger comes up to poke my cheek before moving to outline my eyebrow.
“You look like the mean man.”
My eyes widen, my body stiffening as my brows likely disappear into my hairline. My focus slides to Riley, pleading for help, but she’s still asleep. Well, shit .
“Erm.” I clear my throat, buying myself an extra few seconds. “That’s because he’s my dad.”
I’ve gone and opened the lid on this conversation. Maybe that wasn’t the right thing to say? I should have distracted her. Bedtime stories and movie cuddles I can do, but the hard-hitting questions? I haven’t a clue how to handle that.
Except, didn’t I just tell Riley I was all in? Co-parents? That means I need to be here for the complicated stuff, too.
Yeah, but I was thinking about deciding on punishments if she misbehaves or discussing whether or not she needs braces when she’s a teenager, not whether or not to tell her I’m her brother.
That decision should firmly be Riley’s.
Aurora’s lips twist into a frown, and despite her young age, I can see her mind working. “He said he was my daddy, too.” Before I can figure out what to say, she asks, “Did he play with you?”
My throat bobs as I swallow. “No, he didn’t.”
She pouts. “He wouldn’t play with me, either.” She bites down on her bottom lip in a way that mimics Riley’s, and it almost makes me laugh. “He was scary.”
“It’s okay,” I reassure her, covering her tiny hand with mine. “He scared me, too.” Leaning in, my forehead rests against hers. “Do you want to know a secret, though?”
Her eyes round, excitement lighting up her face as she nods eagerly.
“You don’t need to be afraid of him. He’ll never scare you again. I’m going to make sure of that.”
Feeling a weighted stare, my gaze flicks to Riley, finding her watching our interaction. Concern creases her forehead, even as a softness enters her eyes.
Shuffling closer, her voice is raspy with sleep as she cuddles Aurora and says, “That man, he isn’t really your dad, but he did help make you. Just like he helped make Grayson.” She pauses, waiting. “Do you know what that means, baby?”
I go still. Swear, I don’t even breathe. Don’t dare to blink as I watch on.
Aurora gives a slight shake of her head.
“It means the two of you are siblings.” She waits, the two of us watching Aurora closely. “Grayson is your brother.”
My nerves buzz like a live wire beneath my skin as I wait for her reaction. This little girl is all the blood family I have left, and the weight of that truth presses heavily on me. I want her to accept me, to see me as someone who can be part of her world despite everything. I don’t want to make the same mistakes I have with her mother. Don’t want to give her any reason to distrust me.
Aurora’s brow furrows, and she remains silent while she processes Riley’s words. The seconds stretch on, each one feeling like an eternity. Panic spikes. I glance at Riley, who gives me a reassuring smile, but it does little to calm my racing thoughts.
Then, something shifts. Aurora’s eyes light up with a spark of realization. She looks up at me, her expression a mix of awe and excitement. “You’re my brother?” she asks, her voice filled with wonder.
I nod, my throat tight with emotion. “Yeah, I am.”
A huge grin spreads across her face, and she squeals with delight, bouncing in place on the bed. “You’ll play dress-up with me? And have tea parties? And—and we can be princesses together?”
“Rora, baby, Grayson might not?—”
“Yes,” I interject, cutting across whatever out Riley was giving me as relief washes over me, so intense that I almost feel dizzy. “We can do all those things. Anything you want.”
She throws her arms around my neck, hugging me tightly. “I’ve always wanted a big brother!” she exclaims, her joy infectious. “This is the best day ever!”
Chuckling, I return her embrace as my teary-eyed gaze connects with Riley’s. She’s watching us, her own eyes shimmering with unshed tears and a soft smile playing on her lips.
Aurora’s acceptance, her pure and unconditional excitement, wraps around my heart, soothing wounds I’ve carried for so long. This tiny, fierce little girl is giving me a chance to rebuild a family from the wreckage of our past. And for the first time in a long time, I feel like maybe, just maybe, I deserve it.