CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Balor
M y personal gym, located adjacent to my office in the command center, with its large windows provides a panorama of the city and allows the early sun to light the space.
Working out is part of my morning routine. Today is no different. Sweat coats my entire body from timed rounds of jumping jacks, push-ups, and side-leg kicks. I count in Mandarin, learned from a Master on a retreat in Hong Kong several years ago. Counting, I try to focus my mind and not think of Ella, that she’ll be here in the building near me, all day.
Flexing in extremely low lunges, I close my eyes to concentrate and balance. Even though in my periphery, I’m tracking all motion past the glass partition on the office side.
A door to the gym opens, and there she is, in a plaid skirt and boots. Fuck, those legs wrapped around my waist while I fucked her felt so good.
The vision breaks my chi, and I catch myself before I tumble.
“You told me to let you know when she got here, boss,” Trace says, standing behind her.
I lift my head, sweat pouring into my eyes. “Thank you.”
The way she stares at me makes my body feel different than when any other woman I’d been with looked at me. Because my escorts are paid to look at me like that.
But I don’t buy them to ogle me.
And looking back, I can’t be sure if any of them had or hadn’t. Ella eyes me up and down. Her lids flutter as her gaze reaches my waist, and it triggers something visceral inside me. Even in that L.A. hotel, her stare unraveled me .
Right there, I should have known she lied to me about being an escort.
Ella tugs her purse strap against her shoulder. “I didn’t want to bother you. But your bodyguard insisted.”
“My workout ran late.” I stretch. “You can go, Trace,” I say to him, but my gaze fixes on Ella, realizing she looks horrified. “What?”
With Trace gone, she says in a strained voice, “I’m so embarrassed. That man... He was the one who gave me the money. My father was with me this morning, Balor.”
Fuck. “Trace didn’t say anything, did he?”
Even as I ask, I know he didn’t. A military guy who barely speaks would never betray a boss.
“No. It just messed me up in the head. My father... He’s going to find out.”
“He’s not.” I suck in a breath. “And if he does, I’ll handle it. We’re adults and we had no idea who each other was.”
“Right, tell him you thought I was a hooker.”
“You led me to believe that,” I argue, low and controlled.
The bitter words kick up my memory of those hours, away from the world in a hotel room, where I fucked her so damn good and deep. My cock stiffens, and I want to push her against the mirrored wall, spin her around and fuck her again. Watch her eyes roll into the back of her skull through the reflection while I enter her.
“Yes, but I don’t want him to find out.” Ella exhales and looks away. “Are you done?”
“Not really, but—”
“Finish.” She glances around. “This is a pretty sweet gym. Is it for employees?”
“No.” My forehead crinkles, realizing I sound like an asshole. “My guys...don’t work out. They’re the types who have coffee for breakfast, Red Bull for lunch, and fast food for dinner.”
“The ones in the skinny jeans I passed to get here?”
“That’s them. I’ll introduce you if you want. But...”
“But?”
I breathe and straighten my back. “Hang on. Let me finish this last stretch.”
Balancing on my left foot, I bend my right leg so my foot is pressed against my inner thigh.
“Standing lotus?” Ella asks me, pacing like a caged lioness.
“Standing half lotus,” I answer.
“Well, you can’t do full lotus standing,” she laughs.
“True.” I soak in the glorious tension as my hips release and then change legs.
“Is all this how you get that body?” She waves a hand at me, pointing from my legs to my chest.
“And a strict diet. Which brings me to a conversation I want to have with you.”
Her jaw drops. “You think I need to go on a diet?”
My left leg snaps down. “What? No.”
Her face reddens as she hugs herself. “I know I’ve put on a few pounds.”
“A few pounds? Where?” I approach her despite being drenched in sweat and possibly smelling bad. “I think you’re goddamn perfect.”
“As...what?”
“A woman.”
“But you only date—”
“I don’t date. I pay for sex,” I growl. “I pay professional women to suck my dick, spread their legs, and then leave.”
Her breath hitches. “I didn’t leave. You left.”
“I know.” I turn around and grab a towel. Changing the subject because we can go round and round on this one, I say, “Bear with me, butterfly. Your father told me you needed a job. I never had an assistant.”
“You don’t have to keep me. I have another job offer. I’ll tell my father—”
“No.” I think about the ex who abused her, and I see red thinking of someone hurting her. “Your father was right. You’re just back in town. I don’t think it’s wise for you to work in a place where that animal can find you.”
“Ever?” She clutches her throat. “I worked on a Master’s thesis while I was in Sydney. I want to teach, Balor.”
The way she says my name almost brings me to my knees.
“Just until I know your ex has forgotten about you.”
Although, what I know about abusive types is they rarely give up and walk away. Too often, the woman ends up dead. A shiver runs through me. Fuck. No.
She blinks. “My father, I get. But why you? Why do you care?”
That’s what I’m figuring out.
Breathing heavily, I say, “I don’t know. I just do.”
“Is it wise that I work for you if you have these feelings?” She folds her arms, using my hesitation to get out of this job.
“They’re not feelings, they’re...” Fuck, I don’t know how I feel.
My heart’s been racing since she stepped into this gym. Her smile melts something inside me and awakens a part of me that wasn’t exactly dead. I’ve just never felt alive like this before.
Until now.
“I don’t know what I need as far as an assistant,” I say to get out of my head. “Why don’t we figure it out as we go?”
Shrugging, she says, “That works. What time do you want me? ”
Now... “Huh?”
“To start every morning. Dad said he starts at eight.”
“Eight is fine.”
“What time do you get here?”
“That...changes.” I toss the towel and turn away, facing a problem I’ve been having for months.
Sleeping. My mind is a running engine. I can’t shut it off. I eventually fall asleep but it’s never for very long. Which is why I agreed to Trace, who I need more as a driver than a bodyguard.
“Where’s your office?” Ella asks.
“Next door.” I push a button and steer her through the secret panel that opens to my very utilitarian office.
Ella wanders to the large plate-glass window overlooking my datacenter filled with servers and storage units, her face in awe.
“What are you? IBM?” she jokes.
“You’re not the first person to compare what we have to IBM.”
“That makes me feel...smart.”
“You are smart,” I correct her, forcibly. “The way you speak and carry yourself.”
“Yale will be proud.”
Fuck, I almost forgot that. My brothers and I tout our Ivy League educations and here I accidentally have a contender for top grad working for me. I’m about to ask her something about Yale when my office door flies open and Shane busts in like he usually does.
“Yo, Maverick, Sectors 1 and 2 aren’t reporting.”
I go still when Shane calls me by my code name. I need to remind him and the others in my command center to nix that with Snow around.
I step aside and let Shane see Ella and his face drops. “Errr.”
“Maverick?” She catches on. “Wasn’t he a fighter pilot for the Navy?”
Shane and I exchange glances. She must not know her father goes by Iceman. The first correct thing that man did. Kept his sins out of his daughter’s head, so she can’t be kidnapped for intel.
Thinking about her getting kidnapped makes my vision blur with fury.
The global select team, including me, were never able to hack Iceman’s code. There wasn’t enough time, and it was too complicated. But enough tools and tips were shared for geniuses to keep at it.
Rather than churning endless nights trying to hack it, I carved my own foothold. I hired Iceman and will give him projects that will reveal his code. Even if it’s in pieces.
“It stands for being an innovator, a rebel,” I say, covering myself.
She nods. “Oh right. In the literal sense. Cool.”
When she turns back to the window, I punch Shane in the arm.
“Sectors 1 and 2, you said?”
“Aye.”
Ella turns around and her eyes dance up and down Shane’s frame, igniting the kind of jealous rage I thought I was immune to.
“Anything I can do to help?” she asks. “Whatever it is you’re talking about?”
If this were any other situation, I would shove an unwanted assistant at Shane so fast...
But not Ella.
“Unless you want a career in cyber security, you—” I stop talking when she waves me off.
She wants to teach.
“Shane Quinlan, this is Ella Snow.” I make the introductions. “I’ll meet you in your office in a minute, Shane. ”
She fidgets when I say her name but smiles at Shane.
“Quinlan? Are you Trace’s brother?” she asks.
“Cousin. And it’s nice to meet you,” Shane says to Ella and leaves, flashing me a knowing smirk.
“Can you do me a favor, butterfly?” I grab my gym bag from the chair near my desk.
Her cheeks swell at me calling her that. “Depends on the favor.”
“We’re in agreement that what happened between us, every piece of it, the plane ride, the hours we spent in the hotel room, and how much I paid you stays between us.” I hate that I sound like some pervert coach, harassing his progeny.
“And the shower,” she whispers, her eyes trailing over me again.
That shower sex was the best of my life. “Definitely the shower. Everything.”
“Of course.” She exhales.
“Good, who you fuck is your business.”
“Exactly.” Pain in her eyes floods my veins with rage.
Why hadn’t her father done anything about her abuse?
Watching her with her father, I see Ella controls her own life. But she smartly heeds warnings about her safety.
I love sex and I wanted you...
“How are you doing?” I ask her, moving a tendril of dark auburn hair from her face.
“I’m good. Still adjusting to the gravitational pull of the earth from this hemisphere.”
My eyes go wide. “You feel that too? The difference? I thought I was crazy!”
“I can’t say if you’re crazy. Leaving me in a hotel room—”
“I’m sorry,” I say with my eyes on the floor.
I don’t explain why I left though, and she doesn’t ask because she accepts that I blew off a hooker .
Damn... That’s cold.
“And what will be my duties, Mr. O’Rourke?”
“You can call me Balor around here. Everyone does.” Knowing I probably stink, I say, “I need to take a shower.”
Her jaw tightens. “My duties wouldn’t have anything to do with that, would they?”
Testing boundaries, I approach her. “Depends.”
Getting sucked off in the shower is something I’d highly enjoy. Something in her eyes tells me she would. Because she likes me. And can fall for me, the way I can fall for her.
Then, I remind myself that I don’t do relationships. What I saw one night traumatized me from ever wanting one. Something no one else in my family knows.
If only Ella would agree to something no-strings. But I saw her heart and her passion. She might think she could do it, but when she catches feelings, I’ll hurt her.
“I’ll explain more of what I need when I get out of the shower. In the meantime...” I glance around and think of something for her to do. “Why don’t you order us some breakfast? There’s a menu on my desk with stuff circled that I like. Order yourself anything you want.”
“What about your guys?”
“I’ve never seen them eat food for breakfast.” I shrug, skimming the waistband of my workout shorts.
“I’m sure they do. If you spend hours cooped up in your office, how do you know?” She strolls to the door. “I’ll see if they want something.”
Before I can say no, she’s gone, taking her scent with her.
I know what I want. I want her in my shower and my bed. I have to figure out how to make that happen without getting my heart involved. Or hers.
AFTER THREE DAYS OF Ella being in the office, it’s like all the geeks I hired have developed a Casanova side. They flirt with her shamelessly, clearly not aware of proper office protocol.
The only woman on my team is Camryn, who’s as nerdy as them.
Watching my nerds get their alpha on over my woman unsettles me. My woman. Damn, I like thinking of her as mine.
It’s time to break up this party.
I catch her in the breakroom making cups of coffee for the team’s afternoon caffeine fix. I come up behind her, wanting to press my thick, relentless groin against her ass.
I should fire her. Let her take that job with the school and give her Trace. Of course, what I’m about to suggest is only going to bring us closer. And me to the edge of doing something I know I shouldn’t.
“Can I talk to you for a second?”
She whips around. “Oh, God. You scared me.”
Her complexion goes white and next, she’s shaking.
“Did he attack you from behind?” My voice is low and deadly.
She sniffs. “How did you know that?”
“Because fucking cowards do that. And men who hit women are fucking cowards.” My crass language, vein pulsing, and lips snarling don’t make me sound tame.
But Ella doesn’t look at me with fear. She has no reason to be afraid of me. She trusts me. And I love that. It’s blind trust. I had her in a hotel room and could have done anything to her. If there was an evil bone in my body, I had an opportunity.
“I really want to hold you right now, but it’s not appropriate.”
“I know... Boss.” Her sadness guts me.
How the fuck did we get here? Oh, right. I hired her cyber-terrorist father to work for me so I could take him down.
“He’ll never touch you again. I promise you.”
“You sound so...primal.” She exhales. “But you can’t promise me that, Balor. I won’t be put on lockdown or shoved behind guards because that’ll mean he won.”
Fuck, I love her strength.
“And you’ve not heard from him?”
“No. He’s...” She hesitates. “He has a lot to lose since I’m no longer under his control.”
I’m sickened by what happened to her. I will find and punish that prick. My chest tightens and a thickness in my throat makes me heave. I’ve never killed anyone. Never had to. Never wanted to. I deliver intel to my brothers, who use my evidence to assassinate our enemies.
That’s my role. But this... This hatred of a man I’ve never met and the desire to see him suffer and die at my hand will eat me alive, turn me into someone I don’t want to be.
“I’d like to talk about you working for me,” I say to Ella.
I need to get out of my head or I’ll strangle my plants.
“Did I do something wrong?” She bites her lip.
Fuck, I want those red velvet pillows wrapped around my dick so badly.
“No.” I touch her arm, needing more contact or I’ll go insane. “Ordering food for us all day and making coffee isn’t something I really need.”
She nods. “I understand.”
“But there is something I can really use you for.”
Her eyes widen. “Yeah?”
It’s thrilling to think she’d agree to be my no-strings, plaything. God, the fun we could have.
“If you’ve noticed I don’t always make it into the office by eight.”
“Or nine. Or ten.” She smirks. “Late nights with the ladies?”
I push her against the breakroom wall, my control snapping. “No. There’s been no one else, Ella. I... I can’t.” Rolling my eyes, realizing I’m making it sound like I can’t get it up, I clarify, “I can’t be with anyone else. Not while I still have your taste in my mouth.”
And what I’m about to ask is only going to make her a bigger temptation.
I might be a genius, but I’m a masochist too, apparently.