Chapter 18 Sadie
SADIE
He was doing it again.
That blank stare that meant he was forming a strategy. Despite the six months apart, I still knew his tell. I could read him like I had in the jungle as if no time had passed between us.
“What?” I whispered. I’d taken a huge risk breaking in here to find him, but I’d done it because I had nowhere else to go, no one else to turn to in this weird dilemma that put me and my child in jeopardy.
If he had an idea, I was all ears.
“Let’s go.” He nodded once, as if confirming this plan with himself.
He didn’t say it as a suggestion. He wasn’t asking. It was an order.
“We need to run and hide.” His brow furrowed more. “Again.”
As he reached for the doorknob, moving in front of me in this cramped closet, like he counted on blocking me, I gaped at his back and shook my head. “Wait.”
“No. There isn’t any time to wait. My father isn’t here and there is a shorter staff of security on the premises, but if they see you here—”
“Hold on.” I grabbed his arm and tugged him back.
He couldn’t plow forward like this, calling the shots and dictating what was going on. I’d come here to speak with him, first of all. And then we could hopefully discuss what could be done.
As a team. Partners. Because this whole mess was due to both of our actions. This baby was because of both of us caving in to desire mutually.
He claimed my hand again, giving me the impression that he intended to manhandle me if necessary. As though having a tangible grip on me would secure my obedience. That stony expression of annoyance didn’t win me over either.
“I said we need to run and hide.”
“That’s what I have been doing, but dammit, I didn’t come here to find you just so you could kidnap me again!”
He shushed me, gently pushing me back from the door as he seemed to strain to listen. Footsteps passed by further out in the hallway, but they were gone as quickly as they’d come.
“You can’t stay here. You shouldn’t even be here.” He ran his hand over his face, another tell I remembered. He was clearly flustered and agitated, but I couldn’t really blame him for that. Showing up unexpectedly with the news I was having his baby was bound to throw him off axis a little bit.
“I understand your worry—”
“No, it’s not a worry. It’s a fucking real fear. You are—or were—an agent for the FBI. You are quite literally one of the last people my father would ever want in his home.”
I crossed my arms, digging in for a fight. “Too damn bad. I didn’t know where else to go where I could find you so directly.”
“Whatever.” He shook his head, as if dismissing it all. “You’re here now, and that’s it. You can’t stay here. We’re going to run and hide.”
Just like that, he was back in control. After six months of being completely out of control of my own life, I was pissed that he’d try commandeer my existence again.
Being kidnapped and held hostage by him once was more than enough for a lifetime.
I didn’t think he was going to sedate me and whisk me away like he did in Mexico, but his highhandedness wasn’t wise if he wanted my cooperation this time around.
“I need to hide you where my father won’t know I’ve been with you.” Again, he lowered his gaze. His eyes opened wider with that slight shock again, like it blew his mind that he would be a father. “That you’re carrying my child. I’ve got to get you out of here and hide.”
I gritted my teeth as he reached for the doorknob again.
I didn’t know what to expect in coming here, but I sure as hell didn’t welcome this. Him taking charge. Him deciding everything.
That was his style, though, and I shouldn’t have been so shocked.
He decided what happened before, giving me no chance to voice my opinion. Like when he flew me to the Grand Cayman, tricked me into thinking he was tying me up for sex, then abandoned me. That was all his doing, and I’d be damned if he thought he still had that control over me now.
“You are not making all the decisions, Emil,” I hissed, pointing a finger at his face. “Not again. You did that before and left me stranded to figure out a lie and how to get home.”
“Fine.” He rubbed his hand over his short beard.
“Fine. I did. I chose to do that. I can’t deny that I was in control.
” Raising his brows in a silent prompt for me to argue more, he huffed.
“You’re right. I stranded you there, but that was because—” He frowned.
“No. We’re not doing this here. We’re not talking in a closet like this when you are in danger just being here. ”
“Then work with me.”
He smirked. “No. You work with me. Listen to what I’m saying.
You can’t be found here. I can’t let any guard try to capture you for trespassing.
You’re carrying the one thing that now matters the most to me.
My child.” Slinking his arm around me, he urged me to step closer in a slight hug as he reverently placed his hand on my stomach. “My child.”
I frowned. “Our child.” I’d be damned if he forgot that this baby was not just his.
“We can’t do this. We can’t be here. You can’t be here.”
“I know.”
“Then stop picking stupid little fights with me and listen to me.”
I shoved him back a little. “No. You stop talking like you’re the boss of me with the expectation that you decide everything.”
He growled lightly, glaring at me. “Just follow my lead. We need to get out of here before you’re spotted. That’s the first priority.”
As far as I was concerned, my first priority was finding support from someone. But I didn’t want to be controlled. I wasn’t coming here as a sign of submission he could exploit.
I wanted a partner. An ally. A backup. Go figure I was hoping my enemy could fit in that role.
“Fine.”
He listened again for sounds outside. Holding my hand, he hesitated. “I’m going to run up and grab a bag and come back down here to get you out. I’ll be back.”
I nodded, feeling off-kilter from the roller coaster ride of emotions that this was.
Anger still fueled my blood racing through me.
Relief that he was alive and fine teased me to relax.
The marvel he let me see when he realized I was carrying his baby tempted me to consider joy, but the rush to try to be the boss annoyed me.
He left, closing the door behind me, and I stood there in the dim illumination of the storage light. Moments passed that felt like hours. I didn’t try to track the time, only focusing on being ready for him to return to me.
“I’ll be back.”
He’d told me that in the safehouse in the jungle.
He repeated it here.
I understood what he was saying, but I wondered if he’d ever mean it in a long-term sense. If this quickness to bicker was any indication, we both had a long way to work toward managing a stable relationship of any kind.
Or at least something more stable than him taking off and abandoning me for six months.
Before long, he was back. The door opened, and he thrust a big coat at me before letting me get out of the closet.
Jeez. I nearly fell back with how he pushed his arm out. I got the message, though. It would cover me. Pulling the huge down-filled winter gear on, I watched him adjust a backpack strap over his shoulder. Under his stare, I zipped up and flipped the hood over my head.
“This way.”
It wasn’t a gentle suggestion, but an order. Paired with his taking my elbow, like I was a prisoner to escort to another holding cell, he steered me out of the closet and back out to the garden I’d literally climbed vine-covered walls to get into.
Like we had in Mexico, we fell into a natural formation.
Him in the front, looking out and guiding us forward.
Me in the rear, keeping watch on anything trying to sneak up on us.
If a Dubinin guard stopped him, he’d need to figure out a lie for me, but fortunately, no one stopped us.
Cameras watched from above, but with this hood, my face wasn’t visible.
A short jog around the block led me to believe he was looking for an alternative means of transportation out of here. With that backpack he carried and the one big purse-tote that I’d brought, I doubted we were packed or prepared for a long journey.
“I’ve got a place on the other side of the city,” he explained once we slowed to a walk. He didn’t wait to take hold of my elbow, guiding me toward a car parked at the corner.
“It’s a property that hasn’t been fitted with complete security yet,” he added.
I frowned, worried about my safety.
He unlocked the car with a click of a button on the fob. “It’ll be safe, but it’s not somewhere my father would think to search for me.”
As he opened the passenger door and held it open for, he gave me a stern, sober stare. “I hope it’s somewhere no one would think to search for you, either.”
I smirked. “Trust me. I doubt anyone in the world would ever expect me to be with someone like you.”
But I was, and damn it, was I glad to have him in my corner again.
Just not completely in charge.
“We don’t have all day,” he drawled impatiently.
“Oh, sorry. I was waiting for the rest of the kidnapper routine.” I slid in and prayed I wasn’t making a mistake to lean on him for help.