Chapter 30 Sadie
SADIE
When I came to the next morning, I needed a moment to get oriented. It was just a blip of confusion, and no one could fault me for adjusting. Emil was making sure I was cared for and comfortable. His family members weren’t treating me like I was an outsider.
But still, it was natural to need to take stock and ensure I was safe.
After weeks of being hidden under a hood and deprived of sight, it felt like a blessing to blink and peer at the world as I pleased.
It was a gift I’d never take for granted again.
Being moved and transported over and over again threw off my psyche, too.
As soon as I rolled over and snuggled against Emil, though, all was right again.
His body heat and the shape of his chiseled, hard body were a mapwork I was well familiar with now.
I was safe.
Yet, I knew this was a temporary phase. I wouldn’t stay here at Luka Dubinin’s mansion for good. Putting the energy into figuring out where I would call home felt like too much of an unknown at the moment. Just surviving was a big enough task. Preparing for this baby was more.
No nursery. No thoughts about names.
I sighed as I sat up more, causing Emil to stir.
I had nothing ready for this baby, nothing materialistic, at least, and I needed to start moving on that. I needed a job—income to provide for the baby’s things. I had to secure a place to live—a home and the usual items like a crib and a place to store clothing.
“You look like you’re thinking way too hard this early in the morning,” he muttered in a sexy, sleepy voice.
I smiled, letting him pull me into his embrace to cuddle. Like he always did, he lowered his hand to rest protectively over my stomach.
“What are you thinking about?” he asked.
“So many things. I haven’t done anything to prepare for this baby. I don’t have a job. I’ll lose my apartment soon. I haven’t even—”
He turned my face until he could kiss me silent.
Once he let me free, I opened my mouth to keep going. “There isn’t much time before the baby will be—”
Again, he kissed me quiet, slipping his tongue in to make it a deeper one.
This time, I sighed when he pulled back.
Stroking my cheek, he smiled and stared into my eyes. “I will get you everything you need.”
I wasn’t surprised he’d say that. He was possessive to make that his job. He was wealthy enough to not blink at the expenses that would be required to bring a baby into the world and care for him or her.
But—
Knocks sounded on the door, and I knew I’d need to shelve this conversation for later.
I wasn’t in the mood to argue with him. He was the father.
I wouldn’t keep this baby from him. While I was a strong and independent woman, it was a secret fantasy for so long to be cared for and pampered.
To be with someone I could trust and know worrying was a waste of time.
He furrowed his brow and got up to answer the door. While he didn’t open it far, to hide me so I could have privacy, I heard Allan’s voice clearly.
“Your father is waiting to speak with you.”
“With me?” Emil asked.
“With both of you. He also suggested I advise you to keep your phone off silent again so I don’t have to play messenger like this.”
I smiled at Allan’s wry tone. He wasn’t a man of many words, but I liked him. He was efficient, but also a part of this family, too.
Hearing that Luka wanted to see me, too, renewed the hope that had sprung in my chest. Maybe he was ready to fully approve of me. To let me be in the family and in the loop with more than business.
Emil and I didn’t linger. We both dressed quickly then headed downstairs for breakfast with Luka. Gabriella and Andre weren’t there.
It was just the three of us.
“Firstly,” Luka said, “I would like to do the honors of officially welcoming you to the family, Sadie.”
I smiled, but I tried not to grin like a stupid idiot.
He couldn’t know how much this mattered to me.
No family had ever chosen me. Not when I was a kid, after my parents died. Not when I was an agent and I wanted to fit in with a work family in the office.
Luka Dubinin extending a welcome to his family was a dream I’d had since I was a girl. To fit in. To belong as one with others.
“You will clearly be bringing in another member of the family, and I am remiss to have neglected in congratulating you yet.”
“Thank you, Mr. Dubinin.”
He rolled his eyes. “I just gave you the approval to call yourself one of us. I think Luka is fine.”
Now, that was an honor.
“I told you he’d come along,” Emil said smugly.
“However, that is not enough,” he added. “I would hope that with this welcome to the family that you would be willing to also work for us.”
I laughed lightly. “Oh, so yesterday was for free?” I teased.
Emil frowned. “You won’t have to worry about money.”
“She was joking, Son,” Luka said wryly.
“I felt like I was already working for you yesterday.” Spending an entire day sharing intel wasn’t a leisurely pastime for me.
“You were. And I appreciate your willingness to help us.” He folded his hands on the table and sighed.
“But it is not enough. I have ruled this dynasty with the mindset to take care of my own and only my own. I have no interest in joining any alliances or clubs or being part of any network, and I much prefer to operate as a single entity. Unfortunately, the uprisings and births of groups like this Obsidian Eye are enemies I don’t wish to deal with. ”
“It’s another headache we don’t need,” Emil said.
“We’ve been dealing with the Riveras and Vipers for the last couple of years.
Those two, among others, are messing with us and presenting the main complications for us.
If this Obsidian Eye takes off and we are targeted in any of their operations or if they interfere with any of our revenue sources, then it only makes sense to believe that the best pre-emptive defense is offense. ”
I nodded. “That doesn’t surprise me.”
“I understand that you are busy as well, adjusting to your life after the agency and just being retrieved. You will be busier yet once this baby comes.”
I smiled, resting both of my hands on my stomach. “It sounds like it.”
He huffed. “For one, you will not sleep for months.”
Emil shook his head. “It’s not that bad.”
He shot his son a look. “Just you wait.” Facing me again, he was serious. “With everything that is going on, would you be willing to assist us in an operation to prevent the Obsidian Eye from forming?”
“Absolutely. I think I am more vested in stopping this group than you are. I was set up and almost killed for the knowledge I have about it. I was taken and held captive because of my involvement in spying on the potential members of it. You’re damn right they need to be stopped. You have my word that I will help.”
“Before the baby comes,” Emil added, almost sounding worried.
Luka shrugged. “Hopefully.”
“That means we need to work quickly,” I said. “Now.”
“Music to my ears,” Luka said. “I’ve already prepared Ivan, Alexsei, and Emil to have men ready to report in for this. The first meetings will begin today.”
He really meant it. No need for red tape here. He wanted to act now.
And we did. From this breakfast room, we moved to his study. Allan had prepared for the men to have space in there, but I was the one who spoke the most as the one who had the most insider intel.
“The problem with going after any one of them is that no leader wants to publicly be identified. It’s designed with so many layers of secrecy, and no one seems to want to take the responsibility of having this group as ‘theirs’,” I said.
“Probably because if there is fallout from the Obsidian Eye, their own organization will be hit from the association with it,” one of the older Dubinin spies said.
I tried not to roll my eyes. Duh.
“Having said that, I do have a compiled list of the decoys certain leaders are sending as representatives.” I gestured at the laptop I used so far to share my copied files.
“And also the contenders for the location of where this first meeting is supposed to happen. Since I’ve been…
” I rolled my hand to vaguely gesture instead of finishing that sentence, I sighed.
“Since I was held hostage, I haven’t been tracking the lines of communication I once had access to. ”
“But you know which locations are possible sites?” Ivan asked.
I nodded.
“We can take over that step,” Emil said. “We’ll set our men to track those communication lines.”
I almost frowned. Or even pouted. I hated the feeling that I was back at the agency, talked over and dismissed. Never delegated for the “real” action.
As the day of meetings continued, it became clear that Luka and his top-ranking men saw me as a resource to exploit but not include.
By reading between the lines, it seemed that they wanted me to share what I knew.
And that was it. They didn’t view me as an active part of the mission, this critical pre-emptive takedown of the Obsidian Eye group.
I tried not to let it bother me.
I wasn’t an agent anymore. The thrill of being included in forming a mission wasn’t something I could look forward to in the future. When Luka asked me to work for him and the family, it was a loose concept. I knew that.
Yet, I couldn’t dispel the nagging wish that I wasn’t “done”.
That I still could contribute to making the world a safer place.
I wasn’t ready to quit this passion I'd cared about for so long. That drive burned within me despite the obvious awareness that I would have a different “job”. I would be a mother soon, and while I was overly excited for that to happen, and how much I would grow and learn in that process, I didn’t want to completely surrender my identity of being a disciplined woman who’d join the fight against crime.
“Sadie?”
I blinked, annoyed that I’d zoned out for a moment there.
My frustration at being excluded in the planning part of this mission wouldn’t make them want me here.
It seemed like every little bit of this was being converted into what the Dubinin force would handle.
I wasn’t in any shape to fight, but I was a skilled and experienced project manager to delegate appropriately.
Emil raised his brows. “You okay? You spaced out there for a while.”
“No,” I answered bluntly. I glanced at Luka, then the two cousins. “I’m not okay with being excluded from all of this.”
Luka frowned. “Excluded.” He huffed, holding his arms out to indicate the rest of the room. “You’re right here with us.”
I crossed my arms. “I would like to be active in the planning. The execution of this mission.” Already, I’d overheard a few things that wouldn’t work. I wanted to be trusted to run this mission and have closure with stopping the Obsidian Eye group.
“Sadie.” Alexsei shook his head. “You’re about to give birth. You can’t seriously think you’re coming along on this mission and—”
Emil held his hand up to quiet him. “Sadie, what’s going on?”
I trusted this man, and I prayed he would understand that I really did.
“I insist on not being excluded.”
He watched me, giving me that careful look that hinted at his thinking things through with a strategic angle.
“I have many ideas on how to stop this group from having their first meeting. It was still my mission. I don’t want you to just take over and… rob me of a chance of making my mark one last time. To know that with this one last job, I’ve done my part in making the world safer.”
Tipping my chin up, I waited for their reaction.
I doubted many could come in here and tell the leaders of the Dubinin Dynasty how they wanted things to go.
And the fact that I was a former agent couldn’t look good, either.
They very well could assume that I was up to something by insisting on being included.
It wasn’t a trick. It was just personal for me.
Please. I stared down Emil. Please, if you understand me at all, let me have this last mission to be involved in.