CHAPTER 41
DAISY
I tighten the blanket around my legs as my mom carries in a tray loaded with tea and an assortment of junk food. There’s cookies, cake and every brand of chocolate you could name, all piled on top of each other, and she carries a bag of popcorn between her teeth.
A laugh startles from me. “Mama!”
She winks, bending down to place the tray on the table safely. “I didn’t know what you were in the mood for, so I got everything.”
“Everything sounds perfect,” I say as she takes the seat next to me, stealing a corner of the blanket from me for herself.
“Did you decide on a movie?”
I reach forward and snag a Reese’s Pieces. “Yup. We’re watching Dirty Dancing.”
“Oooh, good choice. You know I love Patrick Swayze,” she says, wiggling her eyebrows at me suggestively and causing me to laugh.
“Hey now,” my dad says as he enters the living room. “I thought you loved me.”
I watch as my mom giggles, her eyes softening as she looks up at her husband. “I have enough space in my heart for the both of you, sweetie.”
I observe the both of them with rapt attention. I’ve always loved the love my parents have for one another. They have the kind of relationship most people dream of. They’re the couple people aspire to be.
It warms my heart and breaks it all in the same breath.
I thought I would have that.
Growing up, it was all I ever wanted.
But although it hurts to know that my relationship didn’t end up like theirs, that I failed to follow in their footsteps, I’m incredibly grateful that I got to grow up in the presence of their love. That I’m a product of that love.
Dad chuckles, bending down to place a kiss on her head before walking to me and doing the same. “Hey, Babygirl. How’re you doing?”
“I’m okay, Dad.”
“You sure?” he asks, taking a seat in his armchair and pulling on his slippers.
“I’m sure,” I assure him, reaching for my tea.
I’m not sure at all, but I’ve done all that I can do. The ball is entirely in Killian’s court. It’s up to him now whether he decides to talk to me or not.
Would I love the chance to explain myself? Of course. But I can’t force him to listen.
Killian needs time. And I have to respect that. It would make me a hypocrite if I sought him out and made him hear me out after I left him in the dark for so long.
I knew he would be hurt. I expected his reaction. And I have to believe that at some point, he’ll come to me and give me an opportunity to make things right.
This can’t be the end.
“Have you heard from him?” my mom asks, her tone cautious.
I blow out a breath, slumping back against the sofa. “No. I saw him at Savannah’s house a few days ago, but he didn’t speak to me.”
My mom pats me on the knee affectionately. “He’ll come around, honey.”
“Hmm,” I mumble, not entirely convinced.
“What about Bella?” my dad asks. “How has she been since you told her everything?”
“She’s been… great, actually. She’s pissed at Killian for not hearing me out, but I understand it. I don’t want people to make him the villain here. He’s hurting bad right now. And it’s all my fault. If anyone is the villain, it’s me. I should have told him.”
My dad pinches his lips together in pity.
“Daisy, no one blames you for what you did. You were going through one of the hardest times of your life. I understand that Killian is hurt. But as your parents, we watched you suffer for almost a year after the wedding. There were times I told your mom I was coming to get you because I was terrified of leaving you alone in that town. I was afraid that one day we’d get the call that you had done something terrible.
And yes, we saw what you leaving did to Killian, and as painful as it was to witness, it was nothing compared to watching my baby girl slowly deteriorate. ”
My throat is thick with emotion. My eyes burn with unshed tears as I soak in his words.
I never considered how it affected them. I had no idea they feared for my wellbeing. I was so… lost in my own sadness that everything and everyone else fell to the wayside.
My parents helped me get set up with an apartment in Montana. They helped me get in contact with the best fertility specialist in the country and would call me after every appointment to ask me how it went.
I thought I hid my emotions well. I plastered a smile on my face for every conversation and masked the pain in my voice as I rehashed information.
I was a robot from the moment I answered the call to the moment I hung up, when the walls would come crashing down and I’d be swallowed back into the depths of hell.
I was angry. God, I was so fucking angry. At the world. At my body. At the doctors giving me bad news after bad news.
I wanted to scream.
I wanted to cry.
I wanted Killian.
The different feelings I was experiencing scared me to death.
I was afraid of being alone, but I knew I couldn’t be around anyone else.
My thoughts were dark and depraved. I had the overwhelming desire to just not be here anymore.
I couldn’t see a way out. There was no light at the end of the tunnel.
Eventually, I sought help. When I couldn’t take the intrusive thoughts any longer, I found a therapist. And she showed me that a lot of the feelings I was experiencing were all side effects of my hormones after such a traumatic change to my body.
She put me on medication to regulate my emotions, and to this day I still take them. I still have to fight everyday not to spiral back into that dark place. But since I returned home, I’ve found myself fighting harder than ever.
“I’m sorry, you guys.” I wipe a stray tear from my face and take each of their hands in mine. “I love you both.”
My mom smiles, wiping her own tear away. “We love you, too, honey.”
“So much,” my dad says, patting my hand affectionately with his weathered one.
The doorbell rings, breaking the moment between the three of us and all of our head’s swivel to the door.
My dad stands with a grunt. “I’ll get that. You two get started on your movie.”
My mom watches him leave, her eyes following his every move as I pick up the remote and hit play on the TV.
The opening notes of Be My Baby by the Ronettes begin to play and I settle in on the sofa, pulling the blanket up to my neck.
My mom quickly follows, making herself comfortable and the moment she’s relaxed, I lay my head in her lap like a small child, ready to distract myself from the shitshow that is my life with some Patrick Swayze.
KILLIAN
Idon’t know what I’m doing here.
I don’t even know what I plan to say when that door opens. The whole drive over here, I rehearsed what I wanted to say, the questions I wanted to ask, but the second I pressed the doorbell, my mind drew a blank.
I should just go.
I don’t know what I was thinking coming over here and expecting answers from Daisy’s parents. They don’t owe me anything. They were just protecting their daughter. They were being parents. It hadn’t dawned on me until this very moment.
Everything they did; the secrets they kept, were all to protect their child. I just didn’t see that because I’ve never experienced that kind of love from my own parents. I’ve never known unconditional love and protection from the two people that should have it in abundance.
I shake my head and turn on my heel; my sights set on my truck. I shouldn’t have come here.
My heads all over the place.
I’m obviously not thinking straight.
I have my foot on the second step when the front door swings open, halting my retreat. With a wince, I turn to the door, coming face to face with Mr Bennett.
His eyes widen in surprise. “Killian. How are you, son?”
My stomach tightens at the use of the nickname, and I shove my hands in my pockets. “I’m sorry, Mr Bennett. I, uh,” I grip the back of my neck, feeling awkward as shit, and flick a quick glance over to my truck. “I don’t really know why I came here.”
Mr Bennett observes me with caution and dare I say… pity. All it does it make me feel worse and confirm that I should not be here.
“Why don’t you come in,” he says, holding the door open in invitation. I debate for a second. I could just tuck tail and run. Or I could finish what I started when I made the choice to come over here and get some answers.
Deciding on the latter, I press the button on my keys to lock my truck and then with a heavy exhale, I follow Daisy’s dad inside.
The entryway is dark when he closes the door behind me. The soft sound of the TV filters from the living room on the left and the smell of freshly brewed tea taints the air.
I toe off my boots by the door, not wanting to track dirt through their home and Mr Bennett disappears into the living room briefly before returning with his wife hot on his heels.
Mrs Bennett’s expression mirrors the exact one her husband gave me when he found me on his porch only moments ago and I clear my throat. “I was hoping I could talk to the two of you.”
Mrs Bennett opens her mouth to say something, but her husband speaks first. “Why don’t you go on through to the kitchen, son. We’ll be there in a minute.”
I roll my lips, dipping my head in a nod as I show myself to the kitchen. I take a seat at the dining table and attempt to compose myself.
I’m sweating profusely, my nerves shot to shit. My brain has turned to mush, and I don’t have the slightest fucking clue what I’m going to say to the two of them when they walk in here.
Now that I think about it, I’m not even sure how much they know.
Did Daisy tell them we’re married?
The noise from the TV in the living room filters in from the open door connecting to the kitchen, making it hard to hear the hushed words coming from the entry hall.
I’d bet my life savings that they’re out there right now discussing how to handle this situation I’ve put them in.
“Mama!” a familiar voice calls from beyond the open door and my spine snaps straight, my blood running cold.
No, no, no, no. She wasn’t supposed to be here.