Chapter 36
Chapter Thirty-Six
DEVON
I can't stop looking at Jade.
She's still on my lap, her fingers tracing idle patterns on my shoulder.
"You were a victim too," she tells me.
I bow my head. I don’t agree with that—I kissed her.
I did this to us.
I shake my head. “No. I kissed her. I made that choice."
"You made a mistake while drunk. She made a calculated decision to destroy your life." Jade's eyes hold mine without flinching. "There's a difference, Devon. A massive one."
I want to argue. But Jade reaches up and cups my face, her thumbs brushing along my jaw.
"You've carried this shame like it defines you. Like that one kiss in a hotel room erased fifteen years of loving me." Her voice cracks, and I feel it in my soul. "It didn't. It hurt me—God, it hurt—but it didn't erase us. Nothing could."
"I felt so stupid," I confess. “When Officer Gray told me how she targeted Grant first, then moved to me when he rejected her."
"You were kind to someone who seemed upset. That's not weakness."
"Isn't it?"
Jade shifts on my lap, repositioning so she can look at me more directly.
God, she’s beautiful. I hate she thinks she’s fat when she’s so fucking perfect.
"Do you know what I see when I look at you?
" she asks. "I see a man who made a terrible mistake and then fought like hell to fix it.
Who slept in the spare room without complaint.
Who cooked my favorite dinner every night even when I couldn't look at him.
Who held me while I cried about things I'd never told anyone. "
My eyes sting. She’s so honest.
Unlike me. But I’ll never lie to her again.
"That's not easy," Jade continues. "That's the man I married.”
I pull her closer, burying my face in her neck, breathing her scent in. She threads her fingers through my hair, and I feel the tension I've been carrying for months begin to untangle.
I kiss her forehead, her cheeks, then the corner of her mouth.
"Devon." My name on her lips is all I need to hear right now.
Then she's kissing me—really kissing me—and it's like old times. This is Jade choosing me with her whole body. Her fingers curl into my shirt, tugging me closer, and want and desire throb in my soul.
I lift her as I stand; her legs wrapping around my waist, and she laughs against my mouth—a surprised, delighted sound I haven't heard in months.
"Bedroom," she breathes.
I carry her through our house, past the photos on the walls and the calendar with the hearts still visible from our anniversary. Up the stairs where I've climbed alone so many nights.
I set her down at the foot of our bed, and she reaches for the hem of my shirt. Her fingers skim my stomach as she pulls the fabric up, and I shiver. It's been weeks since she touched me like this—like she wants to, not like she's trying to prove a point.
"You're shaking," she murmurs.
"You do that to me."
"Good."
I reach for her shirt—slowly, giving her time to stop me—but she doesn't. She lifts her arms, and I peel the fabric away, revealing skin I've gazed at a thousand times.
She's beautiful. She's always been beautiful.
I trace the curve of her shoulder, the dip of her collarbone, the soft swell of her breasts beneath her bra. Jade's breath catches, and I can’t help but grin. I love the effect I have on her.
“You’re perfect.”
Her eyes well up. "Devon—"
"I mean it. Every inch. Every curve." I press my lips to her shoulder, her neck, the hollow of her throat. "I spent weeks wondering if I'd ever get to touch you again. Wondering if I'd destroyed the best thing in my life."
"You didn't."
"I almost did."
She cups my face, forcing me to meet her gaze. "Almost doesn't count. We're here. We made it."
Then she's kissing me again, and there's nothing cautious about it. Her hands roam my back, my shoulders, pulling me against her. We tumble onto the bed, our bodies searching for each other like they’ve been apart for far too long.
They have.
Jade's fingers work at my belt while I unclasp her bra, and then we're skin to skin, and she makes a sound that undoes me completely—
"I love you," I say against her collarbone.
"I love you too." Her back arches as my hands explore her body—the body I'd thought I'd lost forever. "God, I love you too."
Jade moves with a confidence I haven't seen in weeks, taking what she wants.
And what she wants is me.
She pushes me onto my back and straddles my hips, looking down at me with dark eyes and swollen lips. I think I might cum here and now. Fuck the act of sex.
"Jade—"
"Shh." She lowers herself slowly onto my aching dick, and we both groan.
I let her set the pace, her hands on my chest, her breath coming faster. I grip her hips—not to control her, but to keep myself from exploding—and watch her face as pleasure makes it even more beautiful.
This is my wife. This woman survived Mila's cruelty and my betrayal and came out stronger. This woman who gave me a second chance when I didn’t deserve one.
She moves so fucking well against me I sink my teeth into my lip and chant her name.
She’s a goddess, and I will worship her for the rest of my life.
Jade lifts her hips, so her pussy is clenching the tip of my dick, and for a second, my eyes widen and I panic she’s going to let me slip out of her.
But then, fuck me, she slams down with such force I can barely breathe. She doesn’t stop, repeating it until I lose control, thrusting into her from below, slamming her onto me with my fingers on her hips.
“Devon!” she cries out, but I can’t stop.
Over and over, I slam into my fucking gorgeous wife, owning her as much as I can, praying my cum does its fucking job and gives us the baby we both want so much.
“I’m filling you with everything I’ve got, baby,” I mutter, my voice strangled as I erupt into her. “Take it all.”
“Give it to me,” she pants, her mouth twisting into an O as she lets her body give in to the pleasure overtaking it. It’s fucking beautiful to watch her shatter in this way for me.
Only for me.
Afterward, we lie tangled in our sheets, breathing in sync.
"That was… different," she murmurs.
"Good, different?"
"The best different." She tilts her head to look at me. “You fucked me like you meant it.”
I pull her tighter against me. “I fucking meant it, Jade.”
"What happens tomorrow?" Jade asks.
"Whatever we want." I press my lips to her hair. "We wake up. We make coffee. We figure out the rest together."
I feel her breathing even out as sleep claims her, her body growing heavy and warm against mine. I hold her and I let myself feel it—really feel it—for the first time in months.
Hope.
Hope that I can give Jade the life she deserves. That we can keep aiming for forever, and that my stupid fucking actions don’t overshadow what we could have.
Mila has gone. The police have her documented history. The restraining order stands. Whatever consequences come for her, it’s on her.
I close my eyes, Jade's heartbeat steady against my chest, and for the first time in what feels like forever, I sleep through the night.