Chapter 5 #2
As she shivers beneath my touch, my tongue, I feel such a sense of satisfaction at having made them come, this amazing woman I’ve never stopped thinking about. These moments with her are far better than any fantasy I’ve ever had of her. Maybe because finally, it’s real.
Emotion floods me, and I lean up to throw my arms around her neck and bury my face in her chest. She holds onto me, and we just breathe together while the steam surrounds us like a warm blanket. Like some ethereal expression of the feelings washing over me, through me, body and heart and soul.
We stay like that for a while, then she asks, “You okay, baby?”
“Yes, I’m good. I’m wonderful. You?”
“So damn good. And you’re so damn good to me.”
“I want to be. I want to do everything I can to make you feel good,” I tell her, unable to express what’s going on inside me. It’s so sharp, so complex.
How have we only been together for not much more than twelve hours, and everything I felt for her all those years ago has come rushing back? How is it I feel so utterly safe with her? How can I feel so much for her already?
“Come on; let’s get out.”
She turns the water off, then takes my hand to lead me out, and begins to dry me off with a thick white towel.
I lean into her as she does it, and I can’t stop the tears that gather at the edges of my eyes.
I have to sniff them back, not wanting her to see them.
But she steps back to look into my face, her brows drawn together.
“What’s going on, baby? Are you okay?”
She drapes the towel around my shoulders, and it’s such a sweet, caring gesture.
They’ve always been like this; a nurturer, always looking after everyone else, being strong for everyone else.
It’s a good reminder that maybe it’s time someone cared for them the same way.
I make a big mental note for myself to keep that in mind.
Not that I necessarily need a note, because I feel like nothing would make me happier than getting to make her happy.
I smile up at her. “Yeah, I am. I’m just feeling so… so light and warm and really, really vulnerable.”
“Of course you are, darlin’. You just got a good spanking and had what seemed like a few badass orgasms. Endorphins and oxytocin and dopamine. Heady stuff. Your response is perfectly natural.”
“Yes, I suppose so. And also, I’m just thinking…how we spent so much time together in that year you dated Marcy—and I’m sorry to bring up her name right now, but she seems to be such an intrinsic part of us knowing each other.”
“Yeah, she was definitely the integral piece—that’s just part of our story. It’s okay.”
“Well…I was attracted to you the moment I met you—I liked you the moment I met you—but of course, I could never do anything about it.” God, how I’d wanted to.
It was a real struggle at times not to just blurt out how I was feeling, and it got harder and harder the more we got to know each other.
I stayed up nights trying to figure out a way to do it that wouldn’t have been absolutely shitty of me.
I cried a few nights. But I don’t want to tell her that, even now.
“And,” I continue, “the three of us were always hanging out. We kind of did everything together for a whole year. All those times we went out to dinner, or for drinks, or had movie nights at my apartment, I was getting to know you.”
I was falling for her.
“We were getting to know each other. It’s not like this is brand new, just a different brand than the one we had before.
And Evie? I have to tell you, this is what I always wanted.
I always had you in the back of my mind.
In the forefront of my mind too often, really.
I always thought you were beautiful, and sweet, and…
if I’m being honest, made for me. But like you said, it couldn’t happen at the time.
And back then I was still of the mind that I had to give every relationship a fair shake, even though I knew it wasn’t quite right with Marcy almost from the beginning.
Then that night at the Christmas party when we kissed?
That rocked my whole damn world. But Marcy and I had just broken up, and it felt far too soon.
I just didn’t feel right about pursuing anything with you.
Hell, you and Marcy were still roommates.
It felt impossible. But damn…the first time I met you…
I just ached for you. And that ache has never gone away. ”
“It’s been the same for me. And now that we’re here together, it’s so much more acute. I’m just trying to wrap my head around it. I don’t mean to sound like a drama queen. Or like one of those lesbians…”
Dru smiles at me. “No, heaven forbid, not one of those lesbians. Although I do have a closet full of buffalo plaid flannels.”
That makes me laugh. “Of course you do.”
“But back to the discussion, because I feel like it’s important that we try to stay on the same page—or at least figure out if we are.
I’m willing to admit that having you here with me is still kind of blowing my mind.
And it feels even better than I’d imagined.
Can we just take it from here? Without questioning it too much? ”
“Yes. Please.”
She strokes my cheek, those beautiful eyes gleaming. “I would really like that. And I’d really like for you to stay as long as you can.”
Those thousand butterflies are buzzing around inside me again, and their wings are warm and gentle. I reach up to take her face in my hands and pull her in to be kissed. And she kisses me hard, hard enough that I can feel the same emotion in her.
I still can barely believe this is real. But it is. She’s right here, her mouth on mine, her arms around me, skin to skin. And right now, I feel like the luckiest girl on earth.