7. The Train #2
At dinner later that evening she sat in the first-class dining car and felt simultaneously fancy and out of place.
Her dress was one of her own designs. A careful replication of a dress she saw one time at the docks.
The woman wearing the original was the most beautiful woman she had ever seen.
It was one of her most prized possessions.
The steam from her meal captivated her senses and she scooped a large portion into her salivating mouth. The dining car was half-empty as a variety of people sat and dined.
She kept finding herself staring at a young woman, about her own age, who had the air of sophistication that she so desperately wanted to emulate. She had shiny brown hair that was worn in the latest style, with a puffy crown of hair pulled together in a tidy knot on top.
Her deep purple dress was spilling over with white lace trim and puff sleeves. When she brought her fork to her mouth, it was a small morsel that the woman carefully placed in her small mouth.
She mimicked the other woman’s mannerisms, committing them to memory so that she could carry herself better than she was raised.
The woman must have sensed someone looking at her because Abigail suddenly found herself staring into the young woman’s green eyes for several seconds. She quickly looked away and knew deep down she was the one. The one that would change everything for her. The next escape she needed.
It was a familiar feeling, but she couldn’t quite place where she previously felt this way. She brushed the feeling aside and decided that if nothing else she could attempt to befriend her and learn a new way to carry herself.
Abigail braved another glance at the young woman and was surprised to see her hand waving, an invitation to come join her.
Her dinner was all but finished, so she returned the smile and made her way to the other table. She remembered the small bites compared to her normal mouth stuffing size.
Smaller bites. I need to remember that, so I don’t eat my food too fast. The thought invaded her mind as she sat down as gracefully as she could.
“I am sorry for staring. I was surprised to see another woman around my age on this journey.” The young woman spoke quickly before Abigail could say her apologies first.
“I am sorry too, I guess we had the same idea.” Abigail allowed the lie to flow easily. “Thank you for letting me come join you.”
“Of course! My name is Theresa Sanderfelt.” Abigail shook Theresa’s extended hand.
“I’m Abigail Winslow. Where are you heading?”
“I am heading back home to New Orleans to be reunited with my fiancé. I spent the summer with my aunt and uncle to avoid the hot season and to allow for my parents to finalize the marriage agreement. I apparently have a large dowry and had many potential suitors. I have only eyes for my Richard though.”
This woman may come from a wealthy family, but humility was clearly not something she was taught, Abigail thought.
“Richard quite literally swept me off my feet,” Theresa continued.
“I was walking with my friend, Margaret, as we headed downtown for some afternoon tea. I wasn’t paying attention to where I was walking and wandered just slightly into the walking path for the horses pulling carriages! ” Theresa gasped for dramatic effect.
Instinctively both Abigail and Theresa leaned in closer. The drama pulled Abigail in and she was genuinely interested in the rest of the story.
“Just as I heard someone scream for me to move, I felt a strong hand grab my arm and pull me out of the way, just before I would have collided with a horse. Can you believe it?”
Theresa collapsed back against her seat as though retelling the story exhausted her.
Why does that story feel so familiar? Abigail pondered, her body remained leaning forward. I must have read a similar story in a book as a child.
“So when is the wedding?” Abigail leaned back and took another sip, amused that this question was able to break whatever spell Theresa was under.
“I am not sure yet. I should hopefully find out when I return home. My parents have been working out all the marriage details. Money is nice, but sometimes it makes life feel like one giant business transaction. I am just happy that Richard’s and my love for each other is real.”
The two young women spent the next few hours talking, sharing stories from their lives and their hopes for the future. Abigail felt torn over her feelings for Theresa. Her new acquaintance seemed like someone she could be dear friends with, but also like someone she’d very much like to be.
“I am happy for you. I know I have only known you for a short time, but I have already grown fond of you and wish you a lifetime of happiness,” Abigail said with as little conviction as she could manage.
She downed the rest of her tea, not even thinking about if that was the proper action of a high-class lady. Theresa didn’t seem to notice.
“I have grown quite fond of you as well. I hope that you will consider visiting me. Perhaps you would consider delaying arriving at your final destination and staying with me until the wedding,” Theresa replied.
She reached across the table and gave Abigail’s hand a friendly squeeze.
“Oh! I could even introduce you to Richard’s brother, Michael. I feel like you two would hit it off.” Abigail pulled her hand away and placed it on her lap.
“I am so sorry. Please forgive me for overstepping.” Theresa pulled her hand away and looked down.
Abigail bit her lip. The idea of being courted, and that was only if Michael was interested in her, sounded awfully exhausting. She remembered her time as Jane and how long it took for her to give into Samuel’s advances.
There were the daily flower deliveries and the chaperoned visits in her father’s lowly cabin, listening to the men talk about topics that didn’t interest her. In the end, she ended up tied to someone who made every decision for her.
Comparing Theresa’s striking beauty to her own plainness wouldn’t invite a quick courtship by a man wealthy enough to give her what she wanted; freedom from control and the ability to follow her interests.
“Theresa—” Abigail reached across and lifted her face up. “You and I both know that is impossible. I don’t have parents to negotiate any marriage contract. While I grew up well enough, I was orphaned at a young age. My uncle is the one who raised me and provided for my financial needs.”
Theresa contemplated this and nodded, “It is just so tragic that money must dictate so many of our life decisions.” She sipped her tea, shaking her head thoughtfully.
“Plus, I am already pledged to another man.” Once the lies began to off her tongue, Abigail couldn’t stop them. She felt so empowered by using her words to manipulate Theresa and to have her believe the fabrication she was delicately weaving.
“I must be off to bed. My father always told me that it is best to rest early, rise early.” She shrugged. “I am not sure if that applies to everyone, but I must admit I am rather tired. Thank you for talking with me today. I hope you will join me tomorrow for breakfast and more conversation.”
Theresa yawned and stood up. “I talked so much about myself; I don’t know much about you. Maybe you can tell me about your childhood and your uncle or maybe even about this mystery man you are to wed.”
Abigail stood and hugged Theresa. It was instinct. Since saying goodbye to her family at her funeral, she didn’t care much for physical contact.
“No, thank you for inviting me into your life and sharing so much about yourself. I enjoyed learning all about who you are and where you came from. I would love to join you again tomorrow.”
As Theresa walked away, a strange feeling came over Abigail.
There was a deep pull toward Theresa, and it reminded her of the time she changed from Jane to Abigail.
She focused hard, and soon there was a tether.
It shone bright in the room. Panic filled her as she quickly looked around to see if anyone else could see it.
Her eyes were wide as the tether, which felt oddly familiar, reached out to Theresa’s frame. A tug in her chest made her realize that, in that moment, if she wanted to, she could take Theresa’s place. She pulled the tether back to herself just by thinking about it.
I need to tread carefully. When I accidentally switched with Little Abby she was fully aware. The hairs on the back of her neck stood at the memory of the recognition in the old woman’s eyes through the window.
If we switched now in front of all these people, we would both be locked away for insanity, Abigail thought as she focused on pulling the hand-like tether back.
Theresa had the perfect life and access to a wealth that Abigail could only begin to dream of having in this lifetime.
A new thought entered her mind. Is it possible that the switch from Jane to Abigail wasn’t random? That I was born with this gift? What if I’ve had this power all along? A shiver ran down her spine and chilled her, as though confirming her thoughts.
Before making any switch, she would need to come up with a plan, one that would prevent another traumatizing scene that she’d witnessed when she switched from Jane to Abigail.
Tomorrow is a new day, she thought. And with it new opportunities to come up with a plan.
By the time she made it back to her room, and changed into her nightgown, all the confidence she had felt faded.
“How am I supposed to switch without causing a commotion? She mumbled. “We would both be locked away, accused of losing our sanity.” She threw herself hopelessly on her bed and buried her face in the feather pillow.
“I should just forget about her and focus on my new life as a dressmaker.” Her voice was muffled as she spoke into her pillow. She rolled onto her back and yawned.
Regardless of what happens, I can’t help but feel like this is the beginning, she thought. Images of wearing Theresa’s beautiful gowns consumed her thoughts, and a smile curled at her sleepy lips as she drifted off to sleep.