Chapter 5
Spade
She’s sitting at the table reading. From my position on the couch I watch as she turns page after page. Every move calm and unhurried. The same way she moves about the cabin.
She knows what she’s doing managing her farm, has faith in her abilities, and just does what needs to be done. Like saving a total stranger. If Marble had not been there, with his paw on me, I might have done something stupid and fallen off that ledge.
Fawn. The name conjures thoughts of innocence, na?veté, maybe even a touch flighty. But she’s none of those. She’s calm, controlled, steady.
I watch her for several minutes before making my way to the head. When I return, she’s setting biscuits and jam on the table and has filled my water glass.
“Herbal tea will be ready in a minute.”
“Thank you. I’m starting to feel more myself.”
“Good.”
I glance out the window. The snow is coming down harder. “Satellite phone?”
She shakes her head. I take a bite of biscuit with blackberry jam. “Man, these are good.”
Her smile is tentative but lights up her face. It fades too quickly, almost like it doesn’t get used much and she forgets how. Gonna have to change that.
Finishing off my snack, I palm the mug she hands me.
“Jax was my commanding officer before he retired. When I left Chicago and decided to trek across country to get here, he insisted on regular check ins. Did the same when I told him I was going exploring on his mountain. He knew my intended route, and I updated him earlier yesterday morning. He’ll give me a few days to get in touch before he sends out a search party.
He may have left the military, but he’s still always in control and command.
One of the best examples of a man and leader I’ve ever known. ”
“He’s our landlord at the shop,” she says. “When he heard about Mom, he offered to do the buildout at his own expense. Said it was to his benefit. He’s a really good guy.”
I nod. “I was into carpentry with my grandpa. I’m going to help Jax with the add ons to his cabin. He wants to make it larger now that he’s married with the babies. I guess they’re sharing time between town and the mountain right now. I know he needs the peace the cabin gives him as well.”
“I knew his wife a little when I went to school. She was one of the nice ones,” Fawn comments.
“Yeah. She seems pretty cool. I can see where the two of you could get along. She’s not the fussy kind, even though she comes from money.”
After taking another drink, I twist my cup around and around. “I’m not very good at just sitting around. Anything you need fixed while I’m here?”
“Already?” she chuckles. “You’re bored already? Is it because I don’t have TV?”
“Naw, I don’t do much TV either. Maybe sports once in a while.
I like to build things or fix things. Gramps had an old place, and we’d work together on maintenance.
Then we’d go up to Wisconsin to hike the mountains or fish.
In the military I was always doing recon. I guess I like to be on the move.”
“Did your gramps raise you?”
I rotate my mug a couple more times. “No. My mom died when I was four, my dad remarried a woman who had kids. I lived with them but… Gramps took me every chance he could. I spent most of my weekends, summers and holidays with him. I didn’t really fit the new family thing.
I was the youngest, and they were all big partiers and drinkers.
Dad was a musician, stepmom a bartender.
They each kind of did their own thing. Not a lot of family togetherness.
“I learned a lot about carpentry from Gramps, worked with him as soon as I was big enough to handle a hammer and shovel. He’s also the reason I joined the Army.
He’d been a scout. We did a lot of trekking in Wisconsin.
He and Grams had been married thirty-five years when she passed.
He died when I was overseas. Heart attack took him. ”
She nods. “We got lucky. You with your gramps, me with Mom.”
I study her. Is this woman for real? Down to earth, no nonsense, no theatrics, no drama. “We did. So, do you have something that needs fixing? Wood need chopping?”
“No! You aren’t ready for chopping wood. It’s not even forty-eight hours yet. There’s a small leak under the kitchen sink. You could check that. I bought new pipes but haven’t gotten them installed yet.”
“Do you have any cabin caulk? You’re getting a small draft above the bathroom window. I could fix the inside then the outside once the snow stops.”
“You don’t sit still very well,” she says.
I grin. “Nope.”
“You know you’re supposed to be taking it easy?”
“Let me take a look at the sink, then I’ll rest again.”
The sink takes all of fifteen minutes to replace one joint that had a small crack and put it all back together.
After putting the tools away, I see she’s getting dressed to go outside.
I grab a pair of my pants and a heavier shirt from my pack and change in the bathroom.
Coming out I sit down to pull on my boots.
She gives me a raised eyebrow but doesn’t say anything.
The snow is falling hard, impairing visibility. “Grab the snow rope,” she yells over the wind.
Following her lead, we make our way to the barn, Marble bounding ahead of us until he’s lost in the blur. Once inside the barn I see she has a strip door for the animals leading to the paddock.
“While I muck, you can see if there are more eggs.” She nods toward a screen door in the opposite corner of the barn.
After collecting eggs, I refresh the chickens pine shavings, replace the water supply and replenish the feed.
By the time I come back she’s done cleaning and is adding more feed for the sheep and goats.
Back at the cabin, Marble comes in and Brownie goes out.
“Thanks, I appreciate the help.” She smiles. “You are feeling better, aren’t you?”
“Yeah, not so lightheaded and the headache is better. Fresh air always helps.”
Checking my satellite phone there’s still no reception. I text a message to Jax in case there’s a break in the cloud cover and it goes through.
“Stew’s not done.” She studies me. “Monopoly or cards.”
“Monopoly. But be prepared to lose.”
She kicks my ass, and I love it. There nothing coy or manipulative about her. She’s intense, straightforward and goes for the win because that’s the goal of the game. She never tries to distract me with innuendos or cleavage.
My ex was manipulative and a mantrap. In the divorce I found out I was the rebound guy when she married me.
She thought the next new guy could give her more but found out too late that his mom and dad controlled his finances and as long as she was in the picture he’d get nothing.
Last week I heard she signed the baby over to them, I’m sure for a price, and left town.
Knowing you’ve been played is never easy. Lesson learned.
After our second monopoly game we’re tied. She gets up and checks the stew. “It’s done. We can eat or play the tie breaker first.”
“Tie breaker.”
She wins.
Dinner is down home cooking at it’s best. Thick, rich and chock full of meat and vegetables. I eat two bowls then insist on doing the dishes. By the time she does her final barn check and comes in I’m fading.
“Time for bed,” she announces. She insists I get ready first. I grab my dopp kit from my pack and head to the bathroom and change back into what I slept in last night.
She’s already built up the fire. But I notice the electric heater as well. “You have free standing solar panels. You’ve got an integrated system?”
“Yes. I grew up cooking on the wood stove, so I default to it most of the time. But I have most of the same conveniences as people in town. Mom came into some money a few years before she got sick and we upgraded to an integrated system at that time. Mom was so excited about the stove and washer/dryer combo. Ringer washers and line drying is not fun in winter.”
“How about you?”
“I like them. They make life easier. In hindsight we would have been better off paving the road to the house. It would have helped more when Mom got sick. We got lucky that we’d gotten a satellite phone before winter hit that year. The damage to her heart ultimately forced her to move to town.
“Me… I like living on the mountain. I like my animals. Not because they provide my income. I just like them. They…they’re my family, too.
Could you imagine Marble and Brownie in town?
The neighbors would be terrified. You should see how they act when I have them in the truck when picking up supplies. ”
“What about living alone?” I ask.
“This is how I grew up. What I’m used to. I go to town to help at the shop in the summers. I go to see Mom and John and they come to visit me. I—I’m not a big people person. I like the simplicity. The honesty of living here.”
There it is again. The hurt. Someone lied to her, broke her trust. I hope someone kicked their ass. Or better yet, I hope I find out who and do it myself.
This woman is a rare gem in a world that honors the loud and manipulative. The ‘see me’ people who belittle the average. She’s honest, hardworking, willing to risk herself for someone else. Something tightens in my chest. I push it aside. Too soon.
When she comes out of the bathroom, she grabs a pillow and heads toward the couch. Oh no, that’s not gonna happen. She is not giving her bed up for me. “Please sleep with me again. The bed is big enough. I’ll know where you are if I need you in the night.”
She hesitates then nods.
Brownie has already settled on the floor beside me after nuzzling my face and getting a brief cuddle.
Fawn checks the bolt on the door and climbs in beside me her back to me. Marble follows her getting his last bit of attention before lying down.
Wide awake I lie there listening to her breath until I sense she’s drifted to sleep. Just her presence, her nearness is enough for now. For now… Not for long.