Chapter 26
I'll Burn Alone
Kiki
Eddie lifts his head from my shoulder, a sated grin on his face. “Did not expect that to happen.”
“Me neither.” Although I dreamed about it. Constantly.
But nothing has ever felt as good as him—the way he filled me, the way he claimed me. There was a wildness to it, as he tore me apart, piece by piece, forever ruining me for another man.
We also didn’t use anything.
And for me, there isn’t a single regret. To connect with him like that felt more right than anything else in my life.
Eddie scrambles to find something, anything, to clean us up. He ducks into the other room, where his tools are stored, and returns with some wet wipes. “This is about all I could find.”
“Did you seriously go wandering around the house with your fly open, looking for a towel?”
He shrugs, his touch so gentle as he wipes me down. “Better than you walking around bare-assed with your skirt hitched above your waist. Unless,” he dips down, nipping my shoulder, “it’s for my eyes only. Then I insist you walk around fully naked.”
I hook my fingers in his belt loops, pulling him close and nuzzling his nose. “Only if you return the favor.”
Here’s the thing about Eddie’s physique.
He earned every muscle on the job. His arms, chest, and shoulders are broad and well-defined, built from years of actual work, not just for show.
And unlike the pretty boys who shave off every inch of body hair, Eddie’s chest carries a dusting of it, with a trail leading down his stomach that makes the entire package that much more scrumptious, even if right now it’s hidden beneath a tailor-made suit.
“Anything your little heart desires.”
God, I missed this. I missed him.
I slide off the desk and start putting myself to rights when I notice the newly extended leg slit in my dress. “Whoops.”
“Shit. Did I do that?” Eddie squats down, examining the popped stitching. “I guess there isn’t a needle and thread around here.”
“You can sew, too?”
He shrugs, intent on repairing my dress. “I like fixing things.”
“God knows you fixed me,” I tease. “I had a feeling that slit would end up creeping higher on my leg. Just didn’t think it would happen quite like that.”
“Didn’t hear you complaining.” He stands and pops me back on the desk, a wickedly sinful glint in his eyes, as he once again guides my legs around his waist.
Round two? Yes, please.
He slides a hand along my jaw and I grab his fingers between my teeth, swirling my tongue around the tips. “Complaining? Are you kidding? I’m already craving more.”
Seems Eddie likes that response, as he claims my mouth in a bone-melting kiss.
I’m all too happy to get in on the action, my hands twisting his shirt, my hips angling upward as his fingers slide beneath my already damp panties and find their mark.
I whimper, desperate for more, but unlike before, Eddie is taking his time now.
He eases me back on the desk, his hooded gaze unyielding as he strokes me, his fingers spreading me wide. “Fuck, you’re so wet. I need inside you again.”
My head falls back as I writhe against his hand, begging for more.
Good thing he didn’t bother to zip up as he frees his cock and slides it against my slick skin. “You ready for me, baby?”
“Please.” I moan his name, my body throbbing as he sinks inside me.
My God, how is it even better this time?
Maybe it’s the slow teasing tempo, his thumb circling my clit as he pushes me to the edge. Maybe it’s the look on his face as he watches me come apart beneath him.
Maybe it’s how he stretches me, plunging deep into my heat.
But I’m right there. Right there—
“What’s back there?” A voice says on the other side of the door. “It’s dark down here.”
A banging noise follows from an adjoining room, bursting like an unwelcome guest into our moment.
Looks like playtime is over. We’re still safely hidden from view, but it’s only a matter of time before someone bumbles in to find us splayed across the desk.
Before someone sees us.
A flash of fear scratches the edges of my mind like nails on a chalkboard. Mr. Howard, Deirdre’s attorney, is at this party. A man who has warned me on several occasions to cool things with Eddie.
I’m guessing an electric, breathless romp is not what he meant.
Eddie drops his head with a sigh. “Fuck, I don’t want to go back out there.”
“Tell me about it.”
“But we better get back before Nolan sends a search party after us.” He drops a kiss to my lips and pulls me to a sitting position. “I’m sorry, beautiful. Promise I’ll make it up to you.”
Thank God for those wet wipes. We’re making good use of the things.
A few minutes later, we look respectable again. Well, almost. Still have this slit to deal with and it’s barely this side of legal now.
Thankfully, I’m a planner. I pull a small safety pin from the desk drawer and fasten the slit. There, no one will notice.
“Look at you, prepared for any situation.” He traces idle patterns across my shoulders, his fingers warm against my skin. “Come on. Let’s go sample some of Nolan’s overpriced fucking hors d’oeuvres. Time to play nice with the locals. Even good old Uncle Ted.”
I pause, shooting him a curious look. “Who is Uncle Ted?”
Eddie shrugs, fixing his tie in the dusty side mirror. “Deirdre’s uncle.”
No, no, no. It can’t be the same man, can it?
“Why… why is he here? Does he work in the film industry?”
Eddie scoffs, dragging a hand through his hair. “Not hardly, although he’s dramatic enough. He’s a judge.”
Jesus Christ. He’s not just a judge, he’s the judge. The man Mr. Howard mentioned could make Eddie’s life hell on earth should his niece give the word.
If good old Uncle Ted sees Eddie and me together now, it’s all over. There’s no way to hide the desire simmering between the two of us, or the faint mark he’s left on my neck.
Double shit.
I dab at it with my powder, but it’s still visible. Pulling my hair to one side, I hide the evidence. For now, at least.
“Fuck, I’m sorry. Got a bit exuberant.” Eddie drags his fingers through my hair, adjusting it slightly. “There. Can’t see a thing.”
But that doesn’t make me feel any better.
I have zero clue what Uncle Ted looks like. Hell, for all I know, maybe it was him tripping about one room over, or worse, peering through the door slats at our intimate rendezvous.
Panic drips over me like boiling water, scalding away everything but fear.
I need to get Eddie out of here. Now.
“You better go. I’ll be out in a few minutes.” I motion toward the door as I search for my other shoe.
Eddie grins. “We don’t have to rush out of here.”
Actually, we do. Sprint is more like it.
“I’ll wait for you.”
“You can’t,” I blurt. “We can’t walk out together.”
I freeze, gripping my heel in my hand, my eyes locked on his concerned expression, and realize I don’t deserve a man like Eddie Landry.
Knowing my luck in life, I never will.
“Kiki, it’s fine. Even if someone saw us, it’s no big deal.”
“No one can know, Eddie.” I shove on my shoe and rush to the mirror to ensure my makeup isn’t smudged. “We can’t be seen together. Not now.”
A scoff flies past his mouth, confusion twisting with the affection carved across his face. “Are you serious?”
Actually, I’m three seconds away from a panic attack, but he doesn’t need to know that. I point to the door again. “I’m very serious. Get out there, and if anyone—anyone—asks where you were, make something up, but don’t mention you were alone with me. Promise me.”
Eddie closes the distance between us, his hand locking around my wrist and pulling me flush against him. He grasps my chin, ensuring I have nowhere to hide. “Are you kidding me? I came inside you, Kiki. For all we know, I just got you pregnant and now… now you want to pretend this didn’t happen?”
No, I want to spend my life with you, have a beautiful baby with you, and love you every day.
But that isn’t an option. Not for a woman like me.
Ashes, ashes, we all fall down.
But I won’t let them take you down with me, Eddie.
I’ll burn alone.
“We don’t want the wrong people to see us together.”
I pray he reads between the lines, realizes what I’m trying to say. That it isn’t safe. That loving me may never be safe.
The fire in Eddie’s eyes extinguishes, leaving only dark coals to glower at me. “Let me guess. Don’t want darling Nolan to know you’re fucking the help. Is that it?”
The man couldn’t be further from a bullseye if he tried.
But then I realize, we never talked about my life. About the demons closing in ranks. About why I need to maintain distance.
“Nolan? No, that’s not it—”
But Eddie is done listening. His nostrils flare as he releases me, shoving back a few steps.
“Damn, I missed that one, but it makes sense. After all, he’s got the big house, the deep pockets and all those fancy Hollywood connections.
Let me ask you though, is he just filling a void, too, or is he actually worthwhile enough for you to stick around? ”
Tears fill my eyes, my mind struggling to find any plausible explanation that doesn’t involve telling him the truth about Deirdre.
Oh, I’m not trying to protect her, but destroying their fragile coparenting setup will only hurt Theo, and that I won’t do.
I’ve hurt enough people.
Eddie paces in small circles, agitation wafting off him like smoke. He grinds to a halt, thrusting a finger toward me. “Stop crying, Kiki. It won’t work on me anymore. What is it about me that you despise so damn much?”
The tears spill down my cheeks, my vision blurring the raw edges of the heartache playing out in real time. “I have never hated you. You mean everything to me. I lo—”