Chapter 13
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
MILLIE
“ L et me see it.” I try to scramble out from under him, but Holden holds firm, his blue eyes hot on me. Jesus, my body is on fire . He makes me feel things that I’ve never felt before. I didn’t know it was possible to freaking feel like I’ll combust if he doesn’t fuck me. “Holden, let me at your cock.”
“Fuck, I love your mouth.” He bites my lower lip, then soothes it with his tongue. “I know you have questions, and I’ll answer them after I fuck you, Rosie. After I’m inside of you, and I make you come again.”
“Let me have a peek.” I bite my lip, and his eyes fall to my mouth. “ Please. ”
He pushes up onto his knees and holds his big, hard dick in his hand, and I can’t take my eyes off of the metal shining at the tip.
Two bars, one on top of the other, just under the head of his cock.
“Fucking hell, that had to hurt.”
“That was the point.”
I frown up at him, and he shakes his head. “Later. We’ll talk later , baby girl.”
He leans forward and rubs himself through my wet slit, and I inhale sharply as pure electricity shoots through me. And when those metal balls rub against my clit, I’m pretty sure I see stars. I might even get a glimpse of heaven.
“I’m being rewarded,” I mutter before I bite down on my lip, trying to catch my breath.
“What?” He laughs and tweaks my nipple as the head of his cock continues to do amazing things to my core.
“Rewarded. For the dry spell. Jesus Christ, Holden.” I reach for him, and he covers me again, smiling down at me as he rests himself at my opening. “Please, I need you inside of me. Right now.”
He kisses me, his tongue pressing inside my mouth as his cock slowly, ever so damn slowly, fills me up, and we both let out a long, low groan. He’s finally here, and I feel like I could cry. Just sob and weep for all the years we’ve missed. He lowers his head and rests his lips against my own.
“You are the sexiest woman I’ve ever fucking laid eyes on.”
And then he’s moving in and out of me in the most delicious rhythm. My hips move with his, as if we’ve been doing this together for years, as if no time has passed between us at all, and he buries his face in my neck, his breath hitching.
“God, I missed you, baby girl.” He nibbles on my skin, just below my ear, and it pushes me closer to my own release. “You’re so fucking incredible. So beautiful.”
“Oh, shit.” I feel it moving through me again. I may not have had sex with a man since Holden, but I’ve given myself orgasms over the years. Plenty, if I’m being honest.
But they’ve never felt like this .
“I’m gonna come. Oh, shit, Holden.”
“Yes, baby. Come for me. Come all over me, my precious girl. My Rosie.”
His voice, combined with the way that metal is massaging inside of me, and just everything , is my undoing.
I explode, clinging to him, my legs wrapped around him. I push and tighten and lose complete control of myself as I have the most incredible orgasm of my life.
“That’s my girl,” he croons, but his voice is tight, and I want him to go over with me. I want him to let go.
“Come,” I whisper in his ear. “Inside of me.”
His breath catches, and he thrusts three more times before he comes with a roar, rocking into me as he spills himself inside of me.
I love it when he collapses on top of me, breathing hard, giving me his weight, if only for a minute before he rolls to the side, bringing me with him. We’re still linked, and I can feel the metal drag along my flesh, and it makes me tighten around him again.
“God damn,” he mutters, tracing my lips with his fingertip. “Are you okay?”
“Am I okay ?” I look up at the ceiling, taking stock. “No. I wouldn’t use that word at all. Not okay . I’m…well-fucked. I’m…humming. I’m really happy.”
His smile is bright and proud, and he kisses my nose and then my lips. “I’m going to clean you up before we make an even bigger mess.”
He pulls out, making me whimper as my nerve endings wake up once more, and with a smirk, he walks out of the room, giving me a stellar view of his impressive ass.
When he returns moments later, he has a warm cloth with him, and he gently wipes me off, then tosses the cloth into my hamper, and we snuggle down under the covers.
“Questions,” I begin, and he chuckles.
“Hit me with them. I’ll answer anything, you know that.”
I curl into him, my head on the crook of his shoulder, and wrap my arm around his middle, and he presses his lips to my forehead. His fingers drag up and down my spine, and it makes me want to purr. Lying next to him, naked, feels luxurious, and I take a second to just soak it in.
“You’re not asking,” he murmurs before pressing his lips to my forehead and leaving them there.
“There’s no rush.” I nuzzle his chest. I know that I’m not typically super affectionate, but I can’t seem to keep my hands and lips off this man. It’s…comforting, being here in his arms. “You know I’m going to ask about the piercings.”
“I figured.” His fingertips drag up and down my spine again and then into my hair, and I push into his fingers, as if I were a feline.
“And the tattoos. You’ve done a lot to your body since I last saw you naked, Holden.”
“Hmm,” he agrees. “How deep are we getting here, Rosie?”
“You were just so deep inside of me that you practically pierced a lung, so I’d say we can get pretty personal.”
That makes him laugh, and then he rolls me to my side and kisses me softly and slowly.
“You’re funny,” he murmurs softly, nuzzling my nose. God, cuddly Holden is awesome. “You’ve always been funny.”
I love lying here like this, with just the soft glow of the bedside light on, under the covers with this man. It feels so sweet and intimate, and I hope we do it often.
“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.” I cup his face, and he turns to press a kiss to my palm.
“It started with the wild rose tat,” he begins as he takes my hand in his and links our fingers, then holds them close between us. I can’t get enough of how his inked skin looks against my untouched flesh.
“When did you do that?”
“About a month after I ended things with you.”
My eyes widen in surprise. “Holy shit, Holden.”
“I was missing you, and it hurt. So, I decided to get something that hurt physically so I could try to mask the pain in my heart. And that’s how it went for eight long years.”
I swallow hard, trying to will away the tears.
“Every time the missing you got to be too much, I’d get another one. And another, until the sleeve was finished.”
I’m tracing the ink with my free hand, listening intently. He did all of this because he missed me?
“Why the piercings, Holden?”
My gaze finds his again, and he looks so unbearably sad that it takes my breath away.
“The first one was when you graduated college, and I couldn’t celebrate with you. During the month we were together, I’d decided that when you graduated, I’d take you wherever you wanted to go. Europe, or somewhere tropical. I didn’t care. It was about you and what you wanted.”
“We were together before my sophomore year, Holden.”
His eyes just hold mine, and my heart aches a little more.
“And the second?” I ask when he doesn’t answer.
“When you bought the coffee shop. I was so fucking proud of you, Rosie. So proud. I wanted to throw you a big party and make a fuss, and I had no right to do that. It wasn’t my place. And that fucking killed me.”
“You brought me flowers,” I whisper, unable to look him in the eyes. “Beautiful flowers, and I called you an asshole.”
“Hey.” His fingers are under my chin, and he tips my face up to look at him. “Baby, don’t do that to yourself.”
“I was so mean,” I whisper. “And you were so nice to me. But I was confused, and I didn’t trust it. And even though it happened years before, I still wanted to punish you for being such a jerk.”
“I deserved it.” He kisses my lips tenderly, and I can’t help but think that he didn’t deserve it. I just didn’t know any better.
“And the hand?” I ask when he pulls back. “Your sleeve used to end at your wrist, until last fall.”
“I thought you were fucking Bridger.” It’s said so simply, I have to pause and take in the words.
“You got your hand inked up because you thought I was fucking someone else?”
“Yes.” His blue eyes don’t leave mine. He doesn’t look away or flinch or waver. I swallow hard.
“Holden, let me get this straight. For the past eight years, you’ve purposefully inflicted pain on yourself because of me ?”
“No.” His hand rests on my throat, so gently that that alone brings tears to my eyes. “I did it as a punishment for what I put you through and as a way to dull all the other horrible shit in my life.”
“Your father.”
He narrows his eyes. “He was a huge part of it, yeah.”
“God, I feel so guilty . ” I move into him, wrapping myself around him in a tight hug. I can’t get close enough to him.
“Shh, baby. No, don’t feel guilty. It was all my own doing.”
I shake my head and pull back to look up at him. “I flirted with you like crazy at that farmer’s market. I basically made you take my phone number.”
“Are you under the impression that I don’t know how to say no when I’m not interested in a woman?” His eyebrow lifts, but it doesn’t make me feel better. “Millie, I knew going into it that my father would be pissed. We both did, but we did it anyway. And I wouldn’t change it. Well, I would change how it ended and what he did. But I can’t.”
“I’m so sorry.” I take his face in my hands, desperate to make him see how much regret I have. “That you went through all of that. I’m so sorry , Holden.”
“Baby girl.” He kisses me and then simply pulls me against him, his hand covering the back of my head as he hugs me close. “Please don’t. I’m okay. I’m here with you, and that’s all I ever wanted.”
“I want to kill him,” I admit into his neck as I shudder with pure rage. “Over and over again. He should have to suffer, for what he did to your sisters, to you, to us. Jesus, I’m so fucking pissed.”
Holden sighs and kisses my temple so tenderly. “We need to move on, Millie. We can’t stay stuck here.”
“I know. It’s really not healthy.” I plant a kiss on his neck and then his jawline. “I do have a confession, though.”
His eyes narrow. “I’m listening.”
“Although I don’t love the reasoning behind the ink and the piercings, they’re hot as fuck.”
That devastating smile spreads over his lips, and I push him onto his back, covering him with my body.
“Now, enough serious stuff for a minute. I have some time to make up for.”
He doesn’t argue. In fact, he doesn’t say anything at all as I kiss over his shoulder and down his pecs. My hands roam over his washboard stomach and down to the perfect V that makes up his hips.
I may not be experienced, but I’m not a kid, and I’m not shy with Holden.
He’s already hard again, that silver metal winking at me as I take his cock in my hand and press the tip against me, then lower myself onto him.
His hands span my hips, and when I start to raise and lower, he guides me effortlessly.
“Fuuuuck,” I moan, loving the way it feels from this angle. So deep, hitting places that he hasn’t before, and I can’t help but let my head fall back as I ride him.
“You’re a goddamn goddess,” he growls as one hand cups my breast, rolling the nipple between his fingers. “Look at you. My God, just look at you.”
His words only make me feel sexier, and I move faster and reach down to cover my clit with my fingers, and his eyes go black.
“That’s it, baby girl, fucking touch yourself.”
I clench around him, and he bares his teeth.
“Good girl. Oh, baby.”
I love it when he talks to me when we’re having sex. It makes me hotter. Makes me move harder and faster, and suddenly, he sits up and wraps his arms around me and kisses me as we make love, sitting up in the middle of the bed.
“Go over,” he whispers against my lips. “Come for me, baby girl.”
I couldn’t deny him if I wanted to. This orgasm rolls through me like thunder rumbling lazily in the sky, and Holden’s eyes close as he rests his forehead on mine and follows me into his own climax.
Just when we’ve settled back into bed, and we’re about to fall asleep, my back pressed to his front and his arms wrapped around me, he whispers, “I have a question for you, Rosie.”
“Okay.” My voice is soft, and I sound very satisfied. “Ask me.”
“Why no one else?”
I don’t tense up. I don’t try to come up with excuses. A week ago, I would have done both of those things, but too much has happened for half-truths or evading.
“Because they weren’t you.”
His arms tighten around me, and I catch another glimmer of metal in the moonlight.
Our wedding rings, where our hands are linked together.
“Sleep well, husband,” I whisper.
“Goodnight, wife.”
I wake up to an orgasm.
“What the fuck?” My hips buck, and my hands instinctively reach for Holden’s hair. His face is planted in my core, licking and sucking on my clit, and his fingers are already inside me, and I don’t even know how we got here.
“Good morning,” he growls against me. “Time to wake up, baby girl.”
“ Fuck .”
“Oh, we will.” He grins up at me as his fingers work faster, and then he’s crawling over me, easily slipping inside. When he’s balls-deep, he kisses me long and slow. “Had to make sure you were ready for me.”
“I think that’s a yes.”
He’s moving in long strokes, filling me up and pulling away, over and over again, and the friction from his metal is delicious .
He takes my hand and pins it above my head on the mattress, and, using that as leverage, he moves faster and harder.
“Mine,” he growls in my ear. “Tell me you’re mine.”
“Yours.” I swallow hard, so lost to him I can’t think straight. “Always.”
After just a few more thrusts, we’re both coming apart at the seams, and then he picks me up and takes me to the shower.
He’s quiet as he washes me, and then himself, and rinses us both before lifting me against the tile and fucking me again. I’m so sore all over, but I can’t tell him no because he’s looking at me as if he can’t get enough of me.
As if I might vanish.
“I’m right here,” I assure him, framing his face in my hands and kissing him gently as he continues to thrust into me against the wall. “I’m right here. ”
He groans and kisses me hard, rocks against my clit, and sends us both over into another climax.
“We’re going to be late,” he says, but he’s leaning on both hands flat against the wall, breathing hard and staring down at me.
“Don’t pull away from me.” I frown up at him. “I feel you shutting down, and I won’t have it, Holden.”
“I’m not.” He pulls me to him and hugs me close as the hot water continues to spray against us. “I promise, that’s not it. Last time, the morning after was my worst nightmare, and?—”
“Never again.” I shake my head emphatically. “It’ll never be like that again. You’ll see me later today. I promise.”
He kisses the top of my head and then my forehead before sighing and letting me go.
“Thank you.” He turns off the tap and reaches for a towel, making sure that I’m dry before he uses the same damp towel on himself.
Before long, we’re dressed and ready to leave the house for the day.
“Are you planning to walk to work?”
“Yes.” I lift my chin, almost defiantly, at my husband. “It’s a nice day out there.”
“Then I’ll drive beside you and make sure you get there safely.”
“You’re not going to drive three miles an hour next to me.”
He puts his hat on his head and smirks down at me. “Watch me.”
“Holden—”
“I don’t think that’s my name anymore.”
I frown at him. “Are you having a stroke?”
“I think I liked the other word better. Right before we fell asleep.”
I blink, thinking back, and then sigh. “ Husband , I’m perfectly capable of walking to work.”
“No.” He kisses me hard and then shoos me— shoos me!— out the door to his truck. “Humor me, baby girl.”
“You’re really overbearing, you know that, right?”
He just shrugs, and then we’re on our way to my shop. He pulls up to the curb out front, and before I can jump out, he grabs my hand and tugs me to him, kissing me hard.
“Have a good day, wife.”
I grin against his lips. “You, too. See you later.”
After one last peck on the mouth, I hop out and unlock the door. Once I’m safely inside, Holden pulls away, headed for the ranch.
My body is sore. I’m not used to any of what we did last night, but it’s not a bad sore. It’s…satisfying . I even have rough spots inside my thighs from Holden’s scruff, and while it’s not exactly comfortable, it’s a fun reminder of what he was doing down there.
I take two steps farther in and then stop. The hair on the back of my neck stands up.
Something isn’t right.
Immediately, I pull my phone out of my pocket and call my brother. Chase is a cop in Bitterroot Valley, and I know he’ll be here ASAP.
“Millie?”
“I know we’re not great right now, but something isn’t right at my shop.”
“Two minutes,” is all he says, and then disconnects.
Should I call Holden back? That seems silly, since I don’t even know for sure if anything is wrong. It just feels off.
I open my phone and discover that Big Jerk has been replaced with Your Husband , and it makes me grin. Quickly, I shoot him a text.
Me: Hey, something’s weird here. Chase is on his way. Just wanted to tell you.
As soon as that’s sent off, Chase is standing at the door, dressed in his uniform. He must have gone to work early today.
“Hey,” I say as I open up for him. “It’s probably nothing.”
“What’s wrong?” His eyes are already skimming the area. “Is something out of place?”
“I don’t know. I got three steps in, and it felt weird, so I called you. I know that’s lame?—”
“It’s not,” he interrupts and kisses me on the forehead. “Always trust your gut, Mill. I’m going to look around, okay?”
I nod, grateful that he’s here.
“Thank you.”
I wait for him by the front door, and after about five minutes, he returns, shaking his head. “I don’t see anything out of order. The back door is locked. Did you see anything on your cameras?”
He insisted that I have security cameras installed at the front and back doors when I bought this place.
“No, nothing was triggered. It’s probably all in my head.” I take a breath, and then I can’t help myself. I hug him. “I’m sorry, Chase.”
“No, I’m sorry. I should have called you before. I’m just too stubborn.”
“I don’t know how Summer puts up with you.”
He chuckles and lets me go. “Me neither. Are you okay?”
Suddenly, there’s knocking on the door, and I whirl around to find Holden there, eyes dark, his whole body tense.
“Oh, I texted him,” I say as I hurry over and let him in. “It’s nothing. Chase looked around, and there’s nothing wrong.”
“Are you sure?” Holden asks my brother, who just nods soberly. Holden turns to me and frames my face.
“I just had a weird gut feeling after you left, but I was wrong. You didn’t have to come back.”
“Baby girl, you texted and said that something was wrong, and you called your brother, the cop. Do you think I wouldn’t immediately get my ass over here?”
I bite my lip. “Well, yeah, I guess you’re right. I shouldn’t have texted.”
Chase laughs behind me, and I turn to scowl at him.
“Good luck with her,” Chase says as he walks past us to the door. “She’s a wild one, you know.”
“Thank you for coming,” Holden says.
“She’s my sister, dude. Of course, I came. I’ll see you later.”
He waves, and then he’s off, and Holden is still tense as he stares down at me.
“You can go to the ranch.”
“You scared me,” he says softly. “And before you say something stupid, yes , you should have called me.”
“Aww, that’s sweet.” He narrows his eyes, and I laugh, then boost myself up on my toes and kiss him. “Now, you go to work so I can, too. Everything’s fine here. Nothing even tripped the cameras. It’s just my crazy imagination.”
“First, I’ll have a look around.” I start to object because Chase just did that, but Holden shakes his head and glowers at me. “You stay here.”
“Okay. Overprotective much?” I mutter as he walks away. I prop my hands on my hips and nibble my lip. I kind of love that he rushed back here after my text. It makes me feel…cared for. After just a couple of minutes, Holden returns, more relaxed now.
“I didn’t see anything.”
“Told you.”
“You’re my wife,” he says as he pulls me into his arms. “I’m glad your brother came right away, but I’ll always make sure that you’re safe, Rosie.”
“Maybe it was an excuse to get your fine ass back here so you’d kiss me some more.”
He grins against my lips and obliges me, dipping me back and devouring my mouth, making my head freaking spin.
“Mmm. Yeah, it was totally a ploy,” I murmur, making him chuckle. “Now, go to work, babe, before I take you into the back room and have my way with you.”
“I don’t know who babe is.” His eyes narrow on me, smoldering in a way that makes my thighs clench with anticipation.
“Holden.”
“Try again.” He cocks an eyebrow.
“Big Jerk.”
His lips twitch, but he shakes his head no.
“Husband, you need to go to work now.”
He growls and kisses me again, and when he pulls away, my head is spinning even more than before.
“Go.” I point him to the door and give him a little push. “I’ll see you later.”
“Call me if you need anything. ”
“Yes, yes, I will.” I make a motion with my hands, shooing him out. “Have a good day.”
“I’m going to spank you later, just for that.”
“You can try, husband. You can try.”