Chapter 28
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
HOLDEN
W e’ve been here for an hour, and I’ve never experienced so much amazing, organized chaos.
Children run around, yelling and playing in the yard. Babies fuss and are passed around from one set of arms to another. Jake and his girlfriend, Katie, are cozied up on a chaise lounge, talking and giggling together.
My girl is talking with her mama and two of the other wives, and I’m standing by the grill, nursing a beer, talking with Rem and Ryan.
“I know it’s a family day,” I begin, “but I’d like to talk business for a second, if you don’t mind.”
“I don’t mind,” Rem says and glances over at Ryan, then back at me. “Privately?”
“Ryan’s fine. Hell, bring the other brothers over if you want. I don’t have any secrets.”
Rem turns the ribs on the grill, shuts the lid, then picks up his beer and gives me his attention. “Let’s talk.”
“You might think I’m insane.”
Ryan laughs, and Rem just nods. “Probably. But it’s okay.”
I push my hand through my hair, look out over their property, and then back at Remington. “I want to figure out a way to combine our ranches.”
Ryan immediately sobers, and Rem’s eyebrows climb into his hairline.
“Why?”
I take a deep breath, and then I just start to talk. “I don’t want to sell. I love my property, but there are still a lot of ghosts there, and I’m working on clearing those out. I’m almost there. I burned the buildings, and I’ve already made plans to move pastures around. Now we know that the asshole set traps, and those are gone. I’m not so sure that the property lines are correct anyway.”
“We never stole?—”
I cut Remington off with a shake of my head. “Not you. My father. His father. I’m sure they moved fences here and there, likely by a lot. Assholes.”
“Is this one more fuck you to your dad?” Ryan asks.
“Oh, without a doubt. If he were alive, that fucker would kill me just for being here, let alone talking about merging my ranch with yours. It’s not a financial thing. I have plenty of money. My operation is solid. It’s really the principle. It needs a change. It’s been over the past month or so, since Millie, that I’ve realized how isolated we are on our ranch, how much damage he did. It could be so much more.”
“I actually don’t hate this idea,” Remington says, rubbing his hand on the back of his neck. “Expanding and combining beef production could be huge. We’d be the largest cattle ranch in Montana. Not to mention, you have a lot more water on your land than we do. It would benefit the cattle.”
Ryan hasn’t said much, so I turn to him. “Thoughts?”
“If it’s something you both want, I think you’d be stupid not to do it. It’s too beneficial for both sides.”
“I’d want to make sure that my men have jobs.”
Rem frowns. “We’d be partners, Holden. I’m not going to fire your men, and you can’t fire mine.”
I blink at him. “Partners.”
“Like you said, I’m not buying you out. We’d be merging.”
I nod slowly, surprised that they’re so open to this idea.
“I think we should have more conversations,” Ryan says. “Speak with attorneys, get projections, that sort of thing, and go from there. Think it over.”
“It’s definitely not something to decide over Sunday dinner,” I agree with a chuckle. “But I’m glad I brought it up. I’ve been thinking about it for a few weeks now.”
“Definitely worth thinking over,” Rem agrees.
Millie wanders our way, holding a fussy Lottie. “Ryan, I can’t get your daughter to stop crying.”
“Did you pinch her?” Ryan asks her as he takes the baby and bounces her against his shoulder. “Did Auntie Millie pinch Daddy’s sweet potato?”
“No, moron.” Millie rolls her eyes and then runs her hand over the baby’s head. “She was just sad. Weren’t you, pumpkin? Don’t be sad. Don’t be a sad girl. Aww, you’re so sweet.”
She’s smiling at that baby, making funny faces, and it makes my stomach clench. I want babies with this woman. I want to be here, with her family, and maybe my girls, too, with our kids playing.
I fucking want all of it. Everything I thought I’d never have in my life.
“Hi.”
I look down and grin at a little brunette, who’s missing her two front teeth and smiling up at me.
“Hi there. What’s your name?”
“Daisy.” I squat next to her so I can look her in the eyes. “Brady is my daddy.”
“I knew that. How are you? Are you having a good day?”
“Yeah, it’s always fun out here. We have a house on the ranch, too, but you can’t see it from here. It’s new. We just moved into it. Daddy got me cows.”
“The black beef cattle?” I ask her.
“No, my own cows. Highland cows. Mini ones. Mom told him I could have one , but he got me three. ”
I grin at her. “Cows get lonely.”
“That’s what Daddy said. Anyway, you looked sad, so I wanted to say hi.”
I frown at her. “I looked sad?”
“Kinda.” She shrugs, and then Holly calls her name. “You can sit by me at dinner.”
I grin at her and tug on her braid. “That’s the best offer I’ve had all day.”
She smiles that big, toothless smile again, and then she runs off.
“Well, that was cute.”
I look over at Millie and find her smiling softly at me.
“You’re just a chick magnet, aren’t you, husband?”
Ryan smirks, and even Remington grins at me. I see that Millie’s holding the baby again, and I cross to her, pat the baby on the back, and lean in to whisper in my wife’s ear.
“I’m going to put a baby in you the first chance I get, wife.”
Millie blanches, Ryan and Remington bust up laughing, and I simply grin at her.
“Geez, hold a baby for five minutes, and men start getting ideas. I’m going to find the girls.”
She’s not scowling when she walks away from us, and from the flush on her cheeks, I’d say she doesn’t hate the idea.
“You know, I don’t think I’ve ever seen my sister get as flustered as she does with you,” Ryan says, clapping me on the back. “Way to keep her on her toes, man.”
Remington takes the ribs off the grill, and before he can take them inside, we hear tires pull up at the side of the house.
Remington and Ryan share a frown, and unease moves down my spine.
“I’m about to get my ass handed to me, aren’t I?” I ask them.
“No. This is my fucking house ,” Remington says, anger in his voice. Before he or anyone else can go see who it is, although we already know, John walks around the back of the building.
He grins, obviously happy to see everyone. He hugs the grandkids when they rush over to say hello before they run off to play in the treehouse that Ryan bought them last Christmas.
“Wait for it,” I whisper.
And just then, he spots Millie. His face falls in surprise, but then his eyes narrow, and he skims the area. When he finds me, his face turns to stone. He straightens, snarls, and turns to leave.
“Dad!” Millie calls out, but he doesn’t even look back at her.
“Enough,” I mutter and hurry past her, squeezing her shoulders as I pass. “John. Mr. Wild.”
“Fuck off.”
“Stop. I’ve fucking had it with you hurting my wife.”
I hear the gasp behind me, but I don’t turn away from him. John stops and swings around to stare at me.
“You what ?”
“All you’re doing is hurting my wife, and I’ve had enough of that bullshit. So, let’s have this out. Right now.”
“You piece of shit. ”
“Dad!” Millie cries. I can hear the tears in her eyes, and when I glance over, I see that Chase is holding her, and I’m relieved to see that she’s being taken care of. There’s a crowd gathered, but aside from Jake and Katie, the kids aren’t around, and that makes me feel better.
“WHY DID YOU MARRY MY DAUGHTER?” John roars, getting within three feet of my face. “Of all the people in this town, why my baby?”
“Because I had no fucking choice!”
I rub my hand over my face and pace away from him. It’s time to just come clean. To spell it all out. Because nothing will be resolved here if I don’t, and Millie needs her dad.
“There are two reasons for that.” I glance her way, and she nods, still crying against Chase. “The first one being that I fell in love with her eight years ago. It was sweet and amazing, and I would have married her then.”
I push my hands through my hair, pacing.
“But my fucking father found out and threatened to kill her and my sister if I kept seeing her.”
John growls. Joy cries out. There’s more sniffling happening behind me.
With my eyes on John’s, I continue. “He would have done it. You know it, and I know it.”
“Fuck,” John whispers.
“So, I had to break it off with her, but she’s so damn stubborn, and she was young and sweet, and I had to hurt her. Fuck, I had to break her heart, and it destroyed me. But I had to hurt her to save her. She couldn’t be anywhere near me.”
Stomach roiling, I look at my wife again, and she’s smiling at me through her tears.
“And then the son of a bitch died.”
“So, you swooped in and took her,” John says.
“No.” I shake my head. “It’s way worse than that. So much fucking worse. In the will, he added a clause that stated I wouldn’t inherit the ranch unless I got married within sixty days of the will reading. He left my sisters nothing. ”
“You got married to my daughter to inherit your fucking ranch?” John bellows.
“John.” This is Joy, her voice hard. “Let that man speak, or I swear to God, you’ll be sleeping with the chickens for a month.”
“There is no one in this world that I would marry. No one. Except Millie. Jesus, I’ve loved her for the better part of a decade. And my sisters deserved so much more than what that bastard left them. So, I talked to Millie. I never lied to her. I never tricked her. I told her everything.”
John looks to Millie, who nods.
“And she agreed.”
“How much did he promise to pay you?” John asks her, his face bright red. “Because I’ll fucking double it to get you to leave him.”
“Dad,” she says, wearily now.
“Are you telling me that you won’t divorce him?”
“Of course, I’m not going to divorce him!” She comes down the steps toward him, so full of fire and indignation. “Jesus, I love him so much I might die. And this is not one of those but Daddy, I love him moments. Although, I do. But I love you, too! Why can’t I have both of you in my life? What could he have done to you that makes you hate him so much?”
“It wasn’t him,” John growls, and the pit in my stomach grows as he turns to glare at me. “Your fucking father killed my cattle every chance he got. He wanted Joy back in the day, and when she said no, he threatened to rape her. Threatened to kill her.”
“Jesus,” Remington mutters.
“He set traps on my land,” he continues, on a roll now. “He told everyone in town that I poisoned his cows. That I shot his animals. That I hit on his wife. Jesus.”
Shaking my head, I shove my hands through my hair again. I believe every word.
“That’s something he would do.” I nod at him. “He killed my mother.”
Dead silence.
“What was that?” John narrows his eyes at me and steps closer.
“Pushed her down the stairs. He did that a lot, liked to push her down the stairs. She wasn’t even forty and could barely walk a straight line from all the tumbles she took. But the last time? Well, she broke her neck on the second to the last step. I heard it snap.”
“Fuck me.” I think that’s Ryan.
“I was holding my infant sister, Charlie, at the time, feeding her,” I continue. “Dad laughed. Told me to call someone to come clean it up.”
Millie slips her hand into mine and holds on tight, and John’s gaze falls to our hands, then back to my face.
“Do you think you can hate him more than I do?” I ask, still on a roll. “He beat the shit out of my sisters. Tortured their animals. Why do you think I only have horses and cattle? It was fucking physical and psychological warfare in that house, every motherfucking day. So, I’ll ask you again, do you think that you can hate him more than me?”
John’s breathing hard, and he surprises me. “And what did he do to you?”
“It doesn’t matter?—”
“Yeah, it fucking does. What did he do to you , Holden?”
“Anything and everything he wanted to. I was his punching bag. I was the one he threatened to keep the girls in line. I was the one who worked twenty-hour days because he didn’t want to hire enough help. But in the end, he took Millie away from me. Because I couldn’t have anything good, and it certainly wasn’t going to be a Wild woman.”
I can feel the wetness on my cheeks, but I don’t care. I can’t stop talking. I can’t keep the secrets anymore.
“He left my sisters penniless. And he fucking killed. My. Mom! I buried her myself because he refused to pay to have it done. And when that asshole died, I burned it all to the goddamn ground, and now everything he thought he loved will be shit on by the cows he didn’t even respect enough to treat with any kindness. I married the love of my life, and I’m finally in control of the ranch that I’ve been running for eight miserable years.
“Oh, yeah, after he made me give up Millie, he decided that I must have too much time on my hands if I had time to date. So, I did it all after that while that pathetic excuse for flesh did nothing. ”
“Why did you do it?” Chase asks.
“Because of his sisters,” John says, his voice softer, the fight gone from his body.
“Yes, sir.” I nod stiffly. “He always said, it’s really easy for girls to get lost. To be forgotten. Because no one gives a shit about them anyway .”
“Jesus.” Millie leans her forehead on my biceps.
“But I give a shit. Those girls are my world. They’re all sweet and good people, and if it meant I endured torment every day from the likes of him, it was worth it to keep them safe.”
“You were a child raising those girls,” Joy whispers.
“I was never a child.” I clear my throat and then nod at her. “Ma’am.”
John tips his head back and takes a long, deep breath, then lets his gaze fall to Millie before he looks back at me.
“Is someone going to feed us, or what?”
“Dinner’s ready,” Erin announces. “I’ll go get the littles.”
I hear the commotion of people shuffling away, but Joy joins John, Millie, and me and links her hand with her husband’s.
“It’s time to let this go, John,” she says softly. “For yourself.”
“I need to know one more thing,” he says, turning to look at me. I’m surprised to see that his eyes are glassy. “You say you love her, but—” His lip wobbles. “I need to know that you’ll never put a hand on her.”
“Never.” I hold my hand out to shake his, and he looks at it in surprise. “I swear to you, I would never hurt her in anger. I swear it on my mother, Mr. Wild.”
His eyes bounce to Millie once more, and then he shakes my hand, and Millie dissolves into tears. I wrap my arm around her and tug her into my side, kissing her head.
“I don’t deserve your daughter,” I admit. “But she’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me, and I waited an awfully long time to make her mine.”
“Come on,” Joy says, tugging on John’s hand. “Let’s go eat. Let’s go be with our family. Our whole family.”
John nods and pats me on the shoulder as we follow the girls inside.
“Next time,” he says gruffly, “bring your sisters with you.”
I blink rapidly and then look over at him. “Sir?”
“John. Not sir. And if we’re having family dinner, we’ll have the whole family here. That’s how we do things.”
He winks at me, never cracking a smile, as he walks into the house and scoops up August, hugging the little boy close to his chest.
I have to take a minute to pull in a breath.
“Are you okay?”
Millie wraps herself around me in a hug, tucking her head under my chin. I hold her close and breathe her in.
“I’m…lighter.” I’m fucking exhausted. I’ve been put through the emotional wringer. “And I think things are going to be okay with your dad.”
“You told me you’d win him over.” I can hear the smile in her voice. “You were right.”
“I was only ever worried about winning you over, Rosie.”
“Well, you’ve got all of us, husband. Take it or leave it.”
I laugh and kiss the top of her head. “I’ll fucking take it.”