Chapter 3
Saranna
Isat there, stunned out of my mind.
He couldn’t have surprised me anymore if he had slapped me.
In fact, I still might have been more surprised by his words than a handprint on my face.
Because for all that I knew of Roman, with his piercing gaze and broad chest and brisk manners, him ever deeming me important was not likely.
And yet, he said as if he meant it.
No, I knew he did.
But I couldn’t figure out for the life of me what that meant to me, or how to go about making this work.
Because that saying a little too late? Yeah, I was there.
Not that I didn’t want him, but I couldn’t risk a second burn.
“Stupid,” I muttered to myself. Because I was going off on a tangent that probably wasn’t even true. I was reading far too much into his words and had no right too.
I knew Roman saw me as a friend, at least sometimes, so that would be how I was important, nothing else.
It had to be nothing else. Or I knew I would be trying stuff again and I had no right. Once was my mistake, twice, and well I’m an idiot of epic proportions.
And I was not an idiot.
“You okay over there?”
I snapped my head around to look at him, capturing his gaze as he glanced at me yet again and I offered him a shrug.
“Sure.”
“Talking to yourself, Saranna, is not healthy.”
“Yeah, well, what part of my life is, huh? I mean, I negotiate deals with drug lords, cartel, mobsters, and politicians, all who would probably rather see me dead than anything else. My best friend is a mob boss, I live alone, and have more fun with plastic vibrators than actual men because they’re scared of my family.
“So, why not talk to myself? It seems of everything I listed, that might just be the wisest choice I could make.”
Before I could blink, he pulled the car to the side of the road, threw it in park, then turned to face me, resting his arm along the back of the passenger seat. I cocked my brow at him, wondering what he could possibly say now.
“You could have any man you wanted, you know? Most aren’t scared of Marcell or what he could do to them. Most are scared of you, in fact. Trust me, Saranna, you need a man who is willing to go toe to toe with you, not back down in fear.
“Until you find that man, the toys will have to do. But make no mistake, Saranna, when that man comes into your life, he will push you in ways you didn’t even know you needed. You’re far too strong and set in your own ways that a man like that will scare the crap out of you.”
I licked my lips and gave him a smug look, leaning into his space.
“I thought I found that, Roman, but it seems he wasn’t up to the challenge after all. But I do need to beg the question after that speech of course. What would you do when I found that man and allowed him into my bed, into my life, and paraded him around the family? Will you tolerate it?”
His eyes narrowed as his hand cupped the back of my neck, his fingers entangling in my hair and the whimper of pleasure that slipped through my lips brought him up short.
He could toss out everything he wanted, could pretend that he had no problem with me finding someone to spend my lifetime with, but it was evident he couldn’t stand it.
He just wouldn’t do a damn thing about it for whatever fucked up reason he had going on in his head.
“Thought so. Take me home,” I ordered, leaning back in my seat and crossing my arms.
Spending more time with him would only kill me, I knew this. I was walking a tight rope I didn’t feel like I could handle. And it wasn’t an end where I would die, but it’s an end that my heart would never be the same if I slipped one way or the other.
And I had no doubt that I was going to slip.
Twenty minutes later, we pulled into my parking garage, and I got out, feeling Roman behind me, but I was still trying to gather myself after his comment.
“You know, you should let me go in first,” he muttered, following me into the elevator.
“Because so many people do things to the staff around here, right? I mean, it’s going to happen,” I answered, heading down to my apartment.
“It’s a high-end place with people all around, but that doesn’t make it safe.”
I paused at my door and turned to face him, crossing my arms.
“I think you’re a little overzealous in this, Roman. I have a doorman and a clerk at the front desk; they were both there. It’s the same one I see all the time.”
With that, I slid my key into the lock and then froze, but the lock had already been turned. I swallowed hard before I felt his body against my back.
“What is it?”
“The lock is flipped.”
Before I could do anything else, he pushed me behind him and then opened the door. I clutched the back of his jacket as I followed him in then gasped at the scene before me.
My couch had been ripped in shreds, paintings were slashed and flipped on the wall, my curtains were torn and discarded on the floor.
“Fuck,” I moaned, looking at the mess then running to the kitchen, and seeing the same thing.
“What were they looking for? They had to know you weren’t here.”
I walked into my guest bathroom, seeing it torn apart as well, then into my own room.
“I can’t….I can’t believe this.”
“Do you believe the threat is a little more real now?” he asked and I turned to glare at him. “Do you know what they were searching for?”
“I have an idea,” I muttered, going back into the kitchen. I grabbed a chair, then went to the cabinet above my stove and opened the fake door inside, pulling my briefcase out of a hidden compartment. “This,” I told him, jumping down.
“That has everything, doesn’t it?”
“All my paperwork and all my thumb drives.”
“They’ll be back, and they’ll kill you if they have to,” he told me, catching my eye. “Pack your bag, you’re leaving.”
“And just where the hell do you think I’m going, Roman? This is my home.”
“You’ll stay with me, it’s the only safe choice, because they won’t know I’m the one on the job,” he said and I felt the shiver race down my spine.