Chapter 31
Chapter Thirty-One
Izzy
It’s the headlights I notice first. My stomach knots.
The new house is nicer than the old one. A little smaller and homier, and there’s hidden tech everywhere—even the fridge is connected to Wi-Fi. While the other house had sort of a farm kitchen feel, like it was designed by a company, this one has darker wood cabinets, and light-colored countertops and fixtures gives this place a cottage core vibe.
Is Lance with them? More importantly, did I put on deodorant this morning?
I fail the sniff test and head to the bathroom to get ready. I leave when I feel satisfied with the woman in the mirror. Her hair isn’t a knotty mess, her lips are shiny. Leggings and one of the cuter shirts I packed finish the ensemble. Just enough to make it effortless and casual, like this is how I always look.
Now, I wait.
I feel like my whole adult life I’ve been waiting for something, something unknown and hazy and out of reach. But since coming home, the layers of that haze have lifted. And while I still can’t see clearly, I know I’m getting closer.The garage door opens, and Drew pushes past me.
“LANCE!” Drew sprints from the kitchen and throws his arms around Lance. My heart twists again. I know I missed him, but I didn’t realize how much he meant to Drew. The instant smile that makes the whole room brighter appears on Lance’s exhausted face.How can someone appear so good and so rough at the same time. His skin has a sickly pale sheen, making the dark circles under his eyes more prominent.
“Hey, Champ. How’s it going?”
“Awful. I’m reading Where the Red Fern Grows, and I don’t think these dogs are going to make it. And Specs only plays the Kidz Bop versions of songs and won’t stop for Slurpees.”
Lance flinches. “Which we don’t do because we can’t eat or drink in the company cars.”
Drew blinks for a second and continues in a slower and more practiced tone. “Yeah, I know. I’m just saying it would be super cool if Specs did do that. Not because it’s something we’re used to, but because it’s a cool thing to do.”
Alana steps from behind Lance. “Good save there, kid.” She seems tired too, and she’s wearing the same clothes as yesterday. Did she go back to the office? The hospital? Did she even sleep?
“Are you coming to Family Day?” Drew asks. He’s still standing very close to Lance but speaking to Alana. “Maria is supposed to be singing a song about a tree.”
Alana grins. “I’ve got two god kids in that play. And you think I’d miss the chance to watch Ian make horse sounds on stage? Never.”
She walks to the kitchen, and we follow. Alana moves around the space like she’s lived here her whole life. Finding plates and the stash of cheese in the fridge, she cuts small blocks and arranges them into a smiley face.
Today she seems a lot less threatening than she did the last two times I met her. I can’t tell if this is fake, and she’s doing it to make everyone feel safe, or if she’s in a good mood. “Hey Champ, why don’t you go grab your new PlayStation from the car, and I’ll help you set it up. Maybe I’ll even let you give me a tutorial on Minecraft.”
Proud to have a job, Drew rushes off, popping a cube of cheese in his mouth.
Once the three of us are further away, Lance snaps, “Two fucking weeks.” Lance runs his hands through his hair.
“You’re fucking lucky it’s only two weeks.”Apparently they were in a heated debate before they got here.
“But why? You need me.”
“Do you want the reasons in alphabetical order or relevance? You know what? You don’t get a choice.” Alana counts on her fingers, “One, after a traumatic event—like a resuscitation—no agent is allowed to return to the field until they get a psych eval from Dr. Gate. And since she’s in Texas for two weeks, you’re going to have to wait. Two, you violated basic protocol and put yourself at risk by not carrying the medkit. Three, you were released from the hospital two hours ago. Four, you’re being an asshole, and between Majesty, Izzy, and various other death threats landing on my desk, I’ve got too much to worry about without adding you to the mix.”
Death threats? Me? I swallow, and the motion is not unnoticed by Alana, who starts to rub her temples.
“Two week’s suspension—paid. And I don’t give a shit what you do.”
“Fuck you,” Lance says, pacing back and forth.
Alana exhales and continues her circles on her brain. “And since you’re suspended, you can’t use the company cars, so you’re stuck here until I leave in the morning.”
Oh, that sneaky, lovely, amazing woman.
Lance slams his hands on the counter and braces his weight, his back muscles tense. “You’re being unreasonable. You need me on staff.”
“Oh, I am well aware, but you’re a liability right now, and I don’t have the energy to care.” She rolls her eyes at me as if to say, ‘What the hell? How much clearer do I need to make this?’ “Now, I’m going to hang out with Drew and decompress for a little while. Believe it or not, I need a break too.”
I mutter, “Thank you,” and she nods, but Lance’s back is still to us. I wrap my arm around his waist. “Let’s go upstairs.”
“But…”
“Alana will keep Drew occupied and safe. She also doesn’t CARE what you do.”
He sighs, “Oh.” A few seconds later he lifts his head and makes eye contact. “OH!” Jackpot. He whips around to find Alana, and looking as contrite as he can, says, “Sorry.”
Alana gives him the finger. “Go fuck your girlfriend and come back in a better mood.”
As she turns to head into the living room, I grab Lance by the wrist and drag him upstairs. It’s so weird how quickly a place becomes a home once he’s with me. His lips brush softly against mine. He tastes like coffee, and I melt a little.God I’ve missed him. He’s been consuming my thoughts, but I didn’t realize how much until I had him in my arms. I want to take my time with him. Not a hot and frenzied moment, but something slower and sweeter. Something that lets him know exactly how much I’ve been thinking about him. He goes to kiss me again, but I pull away and rest my head on his chest.
“You okay, Izzy?”
I love the way my name sounds on his lips.
“Uh-huh,” I say, not releasing my hold on him. His heart races, pounding in my ear. My hips start to sway from side to side. I reach my arms up, resting my hands on the back of his head, and thread my fingers through his hair.
He stiffens, but not where I expect him to. He holds his breath. “What are you doing?”
“Holding you,” I whisper.
“Why?”
I don’t know what hurts more, that he doesn’t know why I would hold him or why I would need him to hold me. I try not to let the sting of rejection hit me. “You’ve had a bad week, and my ex is trying to destroy my family along with bringing a new drug into the country that could kill a bunch of people. Plus, you could’ve died. I need this as much as you do.”
“Sorry about all that,”he sighs. “I don’t think I’ve ever missed anyone as much as I missed you,” he pauses, “and Drew.” His grip around my waist tightens, and his scent fills my nose. God he smells amazing, woodsy and spicy with a hint of mint. His heartbeat pounds slower now as we sync up our breaths.
I’ve never done this before. Hold someone. Sure I’ve been hugged before, but always in a platonic sort of way. But this feels different, grounded and stabilizing. He holds me until I lift my head up off his chest and meet his gaze. It’s electric. The way he looks at me, my stomach flips, and I can feel it in my core.
Before I know it, my lips are on his, tasting, teasing and crashing. He grips my ass and lifts me as I wrap my legs around his waist. Seconds later he has me pinned to the wall, his hot breath on my neck as he rakes his teeth across my skin. I gasp when he presses his erection between my dampening thighs. I want him. Here. Now. And for longer.
He whispers, “I’m yours,” and I’m a goner.
Mine. He’s mine, and I’m his. I’ve never been more sure of anything as I am of this.
“Bed,” I say.
Later, our clothes are scattered on the floor, and he’s inside me, kissing me between thrusts and whispering how good I feel. My brain has completely shut down, only flashes of color and back arching pleasure consume me. We lock eyes as our orgasms slam into us, violent and wonderful, gasping between breaths.
“Welcome home,” I murmur as he collapses on top of me.
He lifts his head up, his hair falling over his hazy eyes. “I don’t want to leave ever again.”
My heart clenches because I know he will. And I don’t know how much longer I can stay.