14. Siena
Siena
S printing in five-inch spike heels is not advisable, especially when you’re wasted and in a packed club with sticky floors slick with spilled booze, spray paint, and God knows what else.
It’s immediately clear that I didn’t think this through. I ricochet off the hard shoulders of people crammed into the space, a pinball in a neon-lit machine.
But thank God it’s so crowded. I’m not small, but I’m smaller than Matti, and I slip between people more quickly. Unfortunately, he’s far more graceful than I am.
When I slam into some random guy’s back and start to fall, the stranger turns just in time to catch me.
“Whoa there,” the stranger says, his grin a blur in my alcohol-fogged vision. My buzz, which I thought had burned off the second I saw Matti, swoops back in and takes over my brain. The guy’s face is indistinct, but his teeth are very white.
“Let go of her,” a voice growls behind me. I know who it is without turning around.
I lurch away from the stranger, ready to forge forward, but Matti is faster. His arm clamps around my waist, yanking me back against his solid chest.
“Nope,” he snaps, and spins me around so I’m facing him then throws me over his shoulder before I can get a word out. “MOVE!”
People must obey him because, unlike me, he doesn’t bounce off bodies or get stuck in the crowd as I desperately reach for the hem of my dress and try to pull it down over my ass, screaming at him to put me down.
Within seconds, he’s across the club and stepping through the sliding glass doors onto the terrace, where the night air slaps me with a cold blast. He lets me slide down the front of him, steadying me with an infuriating grin when I wobble on my heels.
I’m drunker than I thought because the second my feet touch the ground, I take advantage of his unguarded stance and punch him square in the stomach. Even through the alcoholic haze, it hurts me way more than it hurts him.
“Ow, fuck,” I hiss, shaking my throbbing hand. His abs are like granite. “What the hell do you have under there? Titanium? Jesus.”
He smirks, and fury detonates through me. I lift my hand to slap him, but he catches my wrist midair, raising his eyebrows at me. “Calm down.”
“Calm down? CALM? DOWN? When in the history of the fucking world has telling someone to calm down actually worked? Fuck you, Matti. FUCK. YOU.”
“Fuck me? If that’s what you came here for, kitten, you didn’t have to dress like a whore to get my attention. But you have it.”
His tone is so smug, and I refuse to look at the smirk on his face, keeping my eyes about a foot lower.
Bad idea. His chiseled torso is glistening with sweat, and his jeans are slung low on his hips, showing off that lickable deep V that disappears into his waistband. Fuck, his body was built for sex.
Heat begins to creep through me, flushing my cheeks and I jerk my gaze back up to his face, noticing the backward cap, the way the streetlight highlights his grizzled jaw line. Jesus Christ, I’m way too drunk to maintain my composure around this ridiculously beautiful man.
His eyes sparkle, and he licks his lips, sending a surge of electricity through me. I drop my gaze again, back to his chest—and that’s when I see it. Bloody claw marks. A red smear on his neck. I step toward him, squinting my blurry eyes, looking closer.
It’s fucking lipstick.
“You’re disgusting,” I growl. “And she’s fucking perfect for you.”
“What are you talking about?” Confusion flickers across his face before he scowls at me.
“Where do I start? Lipstick on your neck, her fucking claw marks on your chest. Did you tell Olivia to bring me here just so you could flaunt your fucking rich bitch girlfriend in my face?”
Every time I exhale, I feel like I’m going to vomit, a combination of too many shots with Olivia and sheer exhaustion with the man in front of me, not to mention my inability to get him out of my brain for more than thirty seconds at a time.
Meanwhile, he’s fucking the Wicked Witch of Tribeca, apparently right on the dance floor by the looks of it. Fucking perfect.
He rubs his hand on his neck, then looks at it, grimacing when he sees the bright red lipstick on his fingertips. “It’s not what you think.”
I roll my eyes and feel my stomach roll with them. “Said every dipshit caught cheating ever.”
“Cheating?” His voice is a blade, slicing right through me, and I blanch, trapped by the dark intensity of his stare. “We’re not together, kitten, so I can’t cheat on you, and if you think I’m the type of man to betray his woman, you don’t know me at all,” he sneers.
I have to step back to steady myself, almost knocked down by his words. His woman. He would never betray his woman. But I’m not her, so that doesn’t apply to me. Another wave of nausea washes over me.
When I don’t respond, he bends down to my level, looking me in the eye. “I told you to stay the fuck away from me, Siena. What are you even doing here?”
“Of course, I see. It’s my fault, right? My fault for showing up and catching you—” I stop myself.
What the fuck am I saying? He’s not mine. He made that very clear. And I’m way too drunk to be having this conversation. I hold up my hands, trying not to fall as the terrace seems to tilt.
It’s impossible to keep the sarcasm out of my voice.
“Wait. I’m sorry. Forgive me. You’re right.
It’s not cheating. Because you have made it very clear all along that you are a fucking asshole who apparently likes to fuck me and a line of other females waiting their turn for the ‘honor’ of sucking your dick. ”
I say the last words mockingly, putting honor in air quotes, and stumble back.
He grabs me and holds me upright, his lip twitching. “Nice to know you think it’s an honor to suck my dick. Why are you here?”
“Not here for you, asshole,” I say, trying to wrench my arms out of his grip. He doesn’t let go. “Olivia invited me. I didn’t know you’d be here.”
He raises an eyebrow. “You didn’t know I’d be at the building I own? The building I live in?”
Valentina mockingly pointing out that I don’t even know where Matti lives flashes across my drunk brain, and I bare my teeth at him snarling like an animal.
“I didn’t fucking know you lived here. You never brought me here, remember?
You had to keep your side piece hidden from your woman,” I say, jerking my head toward the club where I assume Valentina is waiting for him.
We stare at each, scowling, our shared gaze an electric wire practically crackling with intensity.
The wind blows, cutting through my buzz, leaving me shivering. “Fuck, it’s cold. Go fuck yourself, Matti.”
I turn toward the doors, but he’s faster. He steps up behind me, wrapping his arms around me and pulling my back flush against his bare chest. “No fucking way you’re going back in there dressed like that.”
“Says the guy who’s half-naked,” I snort, irritated but considerably warmed by the heat emanating off his skin.
I ignore his erection growing harder by the second against my back.
“And I look hot as shit. This outfit is perfect for my purposes. Maybe I need to take a page out of your book and go find my next fuck,” I snarl.
“Exactly my point.” His voice is low and gravelly, his lips next to my ear, as he slides one hand down over my hip.
He feels so good, his arms wrapped around me, and his sexy voice, that I start to melt into him, hallucinating that maybe he means that he’s my next fuck.
I catch myself and angrily squirm hard, fighting to break free from his grasp.
“Your girl is in there without you with her tits hanging out. Why don’t you go find her, spank her for dressing like a whore in public.
Does she like it when you use your belt, too? ”
His hand freezes on my hip, and he tightens his grip around my waist, his cock instantly like iron. “Do you like it when I spank you with my belt, kitten?”
I have to remind myself to breathe as heat flushes my skin red. Shaking my head as if I’m shaking off his ability to fuck with me, I try to pry his fingers off my hip. “It’s none of your fucking business. We’re not together, remember? You just fucking said it. Let me go, Matti!”
His voice hardens. “Not until you listen.”
It’s literally useless to waste my energy fighting against him. He’s way too strong, and I’m fading fast. “Fuck! What?!”
“Valentina is not now, nor has she ever been my woman.” He sucks in a deep breath and lets it out with resolve. “I would never cheat on you.”
“I didn’t mean ‘cheat’—” I hiss, but he cuts me off.
“Regardless, the lipstick, the scratches: she’s a drunk mess, and even if she weren’t, we are not together. I’m not sleeping with her.”
“Riiiighhhttt,” I slur, my knees buckling.
He whips me around to face him, and everything spins hard and fast.
Shit, I’m going to throw up.
Planting his hands on my shoulders, he ducks down to my height and turns me until I make solid eye contact with him.
God damn, his blue eyes are so fucking gorgeous. His mouth… I want so badly for him to fuck me with that mouth…
“Siena! Do you hear me?” His eyes are searching my face, and my mind rewinds through the past thirty seconds like a slide show, playing back what he said and processing it.
Not sleeping with Valentina, wouldn’t cheat on me.
“Yeah, except you forgot one thing,” I say, holding up one finger and tapping his cheek.
He clenches his jaw, glaring at me. “What’s that?”
“You fought for her . You protected her . That guy at the bar attacked Valentina and you stepped in and stopped it—even though you know she deserved what she had coming! And I didn’t! I didn’t have any of it coming.”
His expression goes from irritated to confused. “What? I don’t know what you’re talking about, Siena.”
“I didn’t do anything, nothing at all except love you— ” He blinks, his eyes widening, and his mouth drops open slightly.
It takes me a minute to register the look on his face and realize what I said.
I back pedal hard. “ Love being with you , I just loved being with you, okay, and you let that asshole take me. Beat me. Rub his disgusting dick all over me.” I choke back a sob.
I’m definitely wasted, because I never cry.
Never. “You didn’t protect me. But you’ll protect her. ”
“Fuck, Siena—” His face is pale, stricken, and he looks like he’s the one who’s about to throw up. “Baby—”
“And not only did you let it happen, you threw me out afterward,” I say, pressing my fingers to his gorgeous lips.
My voice drops to a hoarse whisper. “Threw. Me. Out. Put me on a plane with her so I could see who you really love. Mocking me. Letting me know you could never love a mess like me when you can have someone as glamorous as her. Because that’s the difference, right?
You like fucking me, but you love her? You’re the kind of guy who protects the woman you love.
Which means you never loved me. I mean, of course you didn’t.
You barely know me. And I barely know you.
I don’t know why I feel so—” I stop my drunken rambling, swallowing hard, my vision watery as I stare into his blue eyes that are darkening by the minute.
Why can’t I shut the fuck up? I can’t stop myself from whispering, “Do you kiss her like you used to kiss me? Fuck, I’m so stupid. ”
I turn and fall to my knees, puking on the sidewalk. God, it feels like my stomach is turning inside out as I retch and retch until everything comes up—the tequila, the hamburger, probably even the pizza I ate when I was 10. Ugh, gross.
I feel Matti crouching beside me, holding my hair and rubbing my back. “I’m so sorry, baby,” he whispers so softly that it sounds far away, like a dream. “I’m so fucking sorry.”
Too sick to care that Matti is seeing me in this disgusting state, I stay on my knees, heaving in breaths. I don’t know how long I’m there before I realize that he’s gone.