Chapter 47
I remain awake after Peace drifts off. With her curves pressed against me, there’s no way I’m falling asleep. On my back, I try to breathe evenly. I don’t want to wake her. Staring up at the stars, I trace my thumb in a circle on her shoulder. She seems to like that and lets out a low moan in her deep sleep.
Hearing that, I’m not sleepy at all. My body becomes a live wire. My mind surges from thought to thought. I am who I am. I know I must let her go. But I don’t want to. The idea of leaving her again rips me up inside, now every bit as badly as before.
“Bo,” she breathes out my name and burrows even closer. In her sleep, with her guard down, her desires mirror my own.
“It’s okay, sweetheart.” I press my lips into her hair. It’s satiny soft and smells like roses.
“Missed you,” she mumbles. Her closed lids flutter, but she doesn’t regain consciousness.
“I missed you too,” I admit softly. “So much.” No day went by when I didn’t think about her. Without her, my life is a black hole in space: dark, silent, and empty.
I watch my breath lift a gossamer wisp of her hair. Looking at her, warmth like the birth of a new star lights me up inside. Darkness and silence eclipsed; I hear music in my heart like I did the very first time I saw her. But it’s not guitar chords this time. It’s an entire symphony.
Peace Jinkins enchants me. She’s otherworldly with the moonlight lovingly bathing the beautiful contours of her face. Not thinking only heavenly thoughts, I let my gaze drift lower. Her womanly curves stretch the confines of her sexy cropped top and tiny striped shorts. Lust thunders through me, and my erection begins to throb.
She presses closer, seeking my warmth in her sleep. It might only be the cold that motivates her. But I believe it’s more. The things we have in common that bonded us as kids remain. On some level, she still trusts me, but unlike before, I keep running into an emotional barrier. It’s my fault a barrier is there. I could break through it. But there’s no time. I must go soon.
She grabs a fistful of my shirt as if she senses my unease and knows that my departure is imminent. What I want to do and what I must do are choices at war with each other.
“Stay,” says the devil that looks a lot like me in a leather jacket. “You can be her friend again.”
“You’ll only hurt her with your temper,” chimes in the angel on my other shoulder that looks a lot like Peace, only she’s wearing her sexy pajamas to tempt me.
“I’ve stopped drinking,” I tell the angel. I do a much better job controlling my temper when I’m with her.
“She’s sweet.” The angel’s expression softens, looking at Peace. “Too sweet. You shouldn’t be lusting over her. Peace Jinkins is your friend. She’s not a groupie.”
Nothing about me, the world of rock ’n’ roll, and the woman I’m holding seem to fit together. Nothing about Peace and me ever seemed to add up either, but yet we did. We still do at least from my side. I feel better after spending a few hours with her than I have in all the time we’ve been apart.
“Maybe I don’t have to give her up,” I mutter. “Maybe I can be better, fix the broken parts of me.”
“Bo!” Carson suddenly shouts. I snap out of my thoughts and turn my head. My eyes widen. Bursting through a break in the hedge, he’s only in his boxers and sopping wet. “Come quick.” He points at the lake, a black expanse in the distance. “I need your help.”
“What’s wrong?” My heart racing, I extract myself from Peace. Finding a nearby blanket, I toss it over her.
“It’s Harmony.” He latches onto my arm. “She’s not breathing. I’m afraid I killed her.”