Chapter 63
P issed as hell, I march into the green room, pick up a chair, and hurl it across the space. My vision is tinted red after seeing Peace chatting with my old man like he’s her new best friend. The chair hits where I aimed, shattering the mirror. Good. That way. I don’t have to look at myself.
A tech runs into the room. She skids to a stop seeing me with my face contorted with rage and my hands balled into fists at my sides. Emitting a squeak, she hugs her laptop to her chest, spins around, and scurries away.
“What the ever-loving fuck?” Carson steps inside, but unlike the tech, seeing me pissed off doesn’t faze him. He’s seen my anger plenty over the years when I didn’t have Peace.
“What’s going on?” he asks me, his black brows drawing together.
“I need a drink.” I yank a hand through my hair.
“If that’s the case…” The plunge between his brows deepens. “Then you need to call your accountability partner right now.”
“No. Give me a moment.” My chest heaving, I think about Peace and how disappointed she’d be if she ever saw me wasted. My mind also goes to Harmony and her recent scare. I’m angry, furious at Peace for talking to my father, but I don’t want to scare her. “I’m okay.” I pull in a measured breath and let it out. Then do another.
“You don’t look okay,” he observes, unimpressed by my breathing technique. “Thought you’d be happy and all that shit after having sex with Peace last night.”
“It was only the one time,” I remind him, bitterness seeping into my tone. “I told you she agreed.”
“Maybe you should tell her you changed your mind.” He cocks his head. “If you still want her.”
“Of course I still want her.”
“Okay, then what’s the problem?” He spreads his hands wide. “Why shouldn’t you fuck her again? Get her out of your system.”
I’ll never get her out of my system. Frustrated by that knowledge, I want to throw something again. “Do you know why she’s talking to my old man?”
“No clue.” His blue eyes narrow. “You should ask her.”
“She looked upset.” I shake my head. Leaving her this morning like I did, I forfeited the privilege to ask her anything. “He probably told her some shit about me.” I wonder if he found out we were together last night and warned her away. It probably won’t take much for her to never want to see me again. I should want that. It was why I left her the way I did. I should let her go. I rake a shaky hand through my already disheveled hair and admit, “I left her this morning without saying anything.”
“Ouch.” He makes a face. “Sex was that bad, huh?”
“That good.” I give him a look. “She was amazing. The best I ever had.”
“Ah.” His blue eyes widen with understanding. “She’s smokin’, that’s for sure, but I gotta say I never would have guessed the librarian had a wild side.”
“Gentlemen.” Melinda taps her cane on the doorframe and steps inside the room before I can lay into Carson for noticing that Peace is hot. “I use that term loosely given the destruction of property inside this room.”
“I’ll pay for it,” I grumble.
“Your advance is already in jeopardy. So is your career, Mr. Jackson. But apparently, that hasn’t sunk in.” Her cane swishes back and forth across the rug as she comes closer. For some reason, Peace follows Melinda into the room. Avoiding eye contact with me like I did with her earlier, she stops when Melinda does directly across from me.
With Peace close, I can’t think about anything or anyone else. I stare at her, wanting to reach out and touch her but settling for watching her. She pushes her glasses up her nose, not even glancing my way once. Apparently, she doesn’t have the same fascination with me that I have for her.
“Which makes me more certain of my decision to send Peace on the road with the band,” Melinda continues and snaps her wand shut.
“What?” I exclaim, and Peace finally looks at me. I jolt, feeling that eye contact everywhere. My blood heats as memories from last night assault me.
“She’s agreed to be my eyes and ears on this tour.” Melinda points the end of her folded up wand at me. “You should know that Peace will report back to me if there are any issues.”
“You’re working for the label?” I ask Peace, hardly able to believe it, but it’s Melinda who answers me.
“Peace is interning with Black Cat this summer. In her interview, she expressed an interest in new band development. I assigned her to your band weeks ago.” She aims her violet-blue eyes at Peace. “Didn’t you tell him?”
“No, she most certainly did not.” I frown at Peace. “And you had plenty of time to confess last night before you asked me to fuck you.”
She flinches as if struck, her cheeks turning a brighter shade of pink than her tee.
“I trusted you.” I pin the blame on her when the person I’m really mad at is myself for not being good enough for her. “Of all the people in my life, I never thought you’d lie to me.”
“I didn’t lie.” She shakes her head.
“You failed to mention critical information,” I snap and shove away the disappointment that she wasn’t upfront with me. She trusted that I’d take care of her last night, but she didn’t trust me enough to tell me the truth. “Same fucking thing.”
“You had sex with Bo?” Melinda asks Peace, her nose wrinkling.
“Yes,” Peace whispers.
“That’s unfortunate and highly unprofessional.” Melinda frowns, her displeasure with her intern obvious. “Should I find someone else for the job? Can you remain unbiased?”
“Of course I can,” Peace replies, but she doesn’t appear as certain as she sounds.
“Can you stay out of his bed?” Melinda’s gaze remains locked on Peace. She can’t see, but I get the feeling that in a lot of ways, the exec sees better than all of us.
“It was a one-night stand, and it happened before I officially started the job today.” Peace wraps her arms around herself. “I promise it won’t happen again.”
Fuck me. Her saying it won’t just makes me want her more. Even knowing she lied to me doesn’t put a dent in my desire.
“All right.” Melinda nods. “I’m going to expect you to keep your word.” Her phone buzzes. She withdraws it from her shoulder bag and plays the message. “The driver for Shooting Star has arrived.”
“You ready to catch your plane?” Melinda shifts her focus to me and Carson.
“We’re ready,” I confirm and look at Peace. “But you don’t seem to be. If you’re going with us, where’s your bag?”
“I didn’t bring it because…” Trailing off, she looks at her toes.
Fuck that. “You’re gonna have to look at me, sweetheart. Deal with me.” And fuck this entire situation. “You gotta up your game.” Whatever game that might be. “If we’re going to be working together.”
“I’m not playing games.” Her head snaps up and her beautiful eyes flare. “I’m just here to do my job. I can do it professionally. Work with you and not sleep with you again.”
“That won’t be a problem for me, either,” I lie, then lie some more. “Been there, done that and all.” I can speak words that aren’t the truth, but my body can’t lie. Just imagining having her again, my cock gets rock-hard.
Get a grip, Jackson. I tell myself her lying to me is the perfect excuse for me to be an asshole to her. If I continue to treat her badly, she won’t want to be near me. She’ll do the job of staying away from me for me. I don’t think I can manage it on my own.
Wanting Peace but not being able to have her, it’s going to be heaven and hell with her on tour with me.