25. Chapter 25 - Cole
I ’m pacing the bedroom when Emiliano comes in, but I ignore him as he stands by the door, watching me. He looks regretful, but I don’t care right now. He’s not budging, and I want to know why. Need to know. Is there something going on between Natasha and him? Was there ever? The thoughts are plaguing me, and I can’t let it go. I fucking can’t. It feels like my suspicions are right and he just doesn’t want to come clean. But why?
Emiliano walks toward me, stopping right in front of me, and I stand still and look at him. He’s looking into my eyes, searching frantically, then runs a hand down his face. Frustration bleeds from his every pore. I can practically taste it, but I’m putting my foot down. I’m not going to give him any part of me until he tells me what the hell is going on. He’s hiding something—I know him well enough to be able to tell. And it doesn’t bode well with me. He doesn’t trust me. Or he simply wants to keep me in the dark. I don’t know which is worse.
“Come here,” Em whispers, stepping toward me and closing the distance between us, even though he’s the one who asked me to come to him. His hand wraps around the back of my neck, bringing our faces together until our foreheads are touching. “Please don’t be mad at me.”
“Too late,” I mutter.
“ Baby ,” he murmurs, and my stomach flips. “I can’t stand this distance between us.”
“Then tell me the truth.”
“I can’t,” he says, and he sounds pained by it. “You have to trust me. You need to let this go.”
I laugh, trying to pull away, but he just holds on to me tighter. “You want me to fucking trust you?!” Our eyes connect, his brown ones dilating as he stares at me, licking his lips. I definitely don’t look down at them, and I most definitely don’t have the urge to kiss him. “Give me one fucking reason why I should trust you.”
“Because I—” He gulps. “When have I ever lied to you?”
“Right now.” I huff. “You’re lying by omission.”
“Fuck,” Emiliano says under his breath, leaning into me even more. Our noses bump and our lips brush. I have the urge to close my eyes, to eliminate the distance between us. Obliterate it. But I won’t. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what to do.”
“How about you just tell me?” I ask him slowly. “How about you just fucking trust me?” My voice breaks, and I hate it. How weak I feel around him. How easily he can just take me apart. “How about you trust me?”
“I do trust you,” he says with conviction. But I don’t believe him, so I shake my head. “But this is bigger than me. This involves more than just me.”
“Who, then?” I ask through gritted teeth. I’ll take any answers.
Emiliano sighs. “I really can’t tell you.”
I nod, reaching back and peeling his fingers from my neck one by one. He makes a pained sound when I put distance between us, but I’m not going to cave. No matter how much I already miss his touch. How badly I crave it. “Then that’s settled. Find me when you’re ready to talk.”
I take a step away from him, then another, and his eyes water. This is just as hard for me, but I breathe through the sting in my own eyes. I can’t think too hard about this or I’ll break down. Am I doing the right thing by shutting him out? By pushing him away? What if I fucked up? What if he’s never ready to talk? To come clean? Fuck.
“Where are you going?” he asks as I go into our closet and begin to look for black clothes. “What are you doing?”
“I’m going to take out Andrey tonight,” I reply, letting my clothes drop to the floor and replacing them quickly. He stares at me and takes a step forward, but I shake my head. “Maybe anyone else I can find.”
Emiliano narrows his eyes. “I forbid you from taking Natasha.”
I laugh loudly. “Is this the Don talking now?”
“Absolutely,” he says through gritted teeth. “You will do as I say.”
“Hmm.” I nod. “Yes, sir,” I say sarcastically.
“I fucking mean it, Cole,” Emiliano snaps, and I shiver a little. I love when he bosses me around, when he uses his stern voice on me. But I can’t be weak. So I ignore my body’s reaction and attempt to move past him. He stops me, getting in front of me. Our chests brush against each other’s, and he cups my cheeks roughly and pulls me into him. “Please, don’t go yet. Let me make things right.”
“No.” I shake my head quickly, not wanting to have a change of heart.
Before I can wrench away from his grasp, he slams his lips to mine. I’m powerless to stop him, and I just melt into his embrace, my hands gripping his hips and pulling him into me. I’m falling apart right in front of him. He’s fucking wrecking me. When he thrusts his tongue between my lips, I moan. He groans. His hands tighten on my face, and mine tighten on his hips.
Just as he begins to rut against me, I pull away roughly, putting some much needed distance between us. “This changes nothing,” I say, walking past him and putting on my shoes. He lets me, standing back, his chest heaving.
Emiliano doesn’t say anything as I exit our bedroom, and he doesn’t chase after me. I can’t deny that I feel disappointed. I don’t know what I was expecting, really. Goddamn, I’m worse than a woman.
Shaking my head, I grab my car keys and get in the elevator, pushing the button to go down to the parking garage. It’s going to be a long time before I can take care of this—taking Andrey. I have to wait until midnight probably, when it’s dark out and no one will see. I’m not going alone either. I don’t want to put myself in a vulnerable situation, considering there are guards at the house and Andrey fights dirty. I mean, so do I, but at least I know what to expect.
I text Luca, and he agrees to come with me, along with more men. We won’t have issues. They’ll be outnumbered, and I breathe a sigh of relief. Luca’s quick agreement was probably from Emiliano telling him to come with me. Even when we’re fighting, he’s still trying to protect me. It shouldn’t make me all warm inside, but I can’t help it. I’m so far gone for this man.
* * *
Fourteen hours later, I’m strolling into Andrey’s home. My men took care of the guards, and now Luca is standing by my side as we walk through the huge house. We’re quick, yet quiet, and we have to go through the living room to make it to the stairs that lead to the bedrooms. Just as we’re walking into the living room, I see Andrey sleeping on the couch, the television on at low volume. I smile, because this is just too fucking easy. Why are there no guards inside? Doesn’t he know he’s vulnerable? That he should sleep with one eye open? This is a fucking war, and he just made this the easiest kidnapping known to mankind.
I take the syringe out of my pocket and walk quickly toward him, Luca taking out his gun and pointing it right at Andrey’s face. I stab his leg with the needle, unloading the thick liquid into him, and he wakes with a gasp. We make eye contact and his eyes widen like saucers, but just as he’s about to scream, Luca shoves the gun against his temple. He immediately slumps against the couch once more, and I count to ten. Then he’s out, his eyes closing, his body relaxing.
“Good,” I mutter, and just as I’m about to go up the stairs to see who else we can take with us, Luca stops me with his hand on my arm.
“Don’t,” he says slowly. “He’ll have your head.”
I grin manically. “It’ll be worth it.”
“No.” Luca sighs. “It won’t be.”
I deflate. “Fine.”
From there, I lift Andrey, hoisting him over my shoulder and walking out of the house. Fucker is heavy, his dead weight making me struggle slightly, but then I’m tossing him into the back of the van. I can breathe again in relief, and Luca notices. He grins, and I grin back.
“This ends now,” I say softly.
“Yes, it does,” he replies as we get in and pull away from the house.
I can’t help but notice that it was all too easy. He was too confident in his guards. Didn’t even sleep with a gun next to him. But now I know what this is—when I kill Andrey, everything is going to fall apart. The war will get worse. The Pakhan will seek retribution, and I’ll be targeted. Which means everyone needs to die. Everyone —if we have a chance of making it out of this and making new alliances. I don’t know how we’ll manage that, how we’re going to achieve a new alliance with them, but I’m sure we’ll figure it out. It can’t be that fucking hard. In fact, I’m sure the Pakhan’s brother will be thanking us for giving him the opportunity to rise in rank and become the leader.
I tie Andrey up, getting his hands and feet. After all, I don’t know how long he’ll be knocked out for. The time varies from person to person. Before long, we’re pulling into the warehouse, but I’m exhausted, so I just delegate everything to Luca. I’ll come back tomorrow after I’ve slept off my anger. When I’m not so emotionally fucked up.
Getting in my car, I drive on auto pilot. I barely remember how I made it home before pulling into my parking spot. I stay in the car for another five minutes, debating if I should go inside or get a hotel room. But the need to be close to him wins out. I’ll just stay in my old room for tonight. So that’s what I do, going up the elevator until I’m standing in the penthouse’s living room. I toe off my shoes and place them in the coat closet, then tiptoe my way across the living room and to the hallway.
Once I’m in my room, I leave the door open, knowing if I try to close it, I’ll alert Emiliano of my arrival. The last thing I want to do right now is deal with him. I take off all my clothes and slip into my bed, getting comfortable under the sheets. Just as I close my eyes, I feel the bed dip behind me. I freeze, my breath stuttering in my lungs.
Emiliano buries his face into the crook of my neck and inhales, plastering his front to my back and throwing his arm over my waist, pulling my body into his. I can’t move, can’t even breathe. He presses a soft kiss to my neck, his lips lingering, and I close my watering eyes to keep myself from breaking down. It’s only been a few hours, and I fucking missed him. The heat of his body against mine. His hand in mine. His lips. Everything. I hate fighting with him. Can’t he fucking see that? He’s breaking me.
“Wherever you go, I’ll chase you,” Emiliano whispers against the shell of my ear, and I whimper. “You’ll sleep in my fucking arms, or you won’t sleep at all.”
“You’re crazy,” I mutter under my breath, and he chuckles, his warm, minty breath hitting my cheek as he leans over me.
“For you,” he says softly, and my stomach flutters. “You make me this way. Out of my fucking mind for you.”
I’m silent, not knowing how to reply without showing him all my cards. I’m weak for him and he knows it. But being weak is one thing, and being a fucking pushover is another. I won’t be that—not even for him.
Emiliano turns my face toward his and presses his lips to mine softly, a kiss that ends way too quickly. But I don’t chase him, don’t go back for seconds. He doesn’t seem to be deterred by that though. Instead, he presses his nose to the back of my head and inhales deeply, groaning.
“I can’t live without you, Cole.” I blink furiously at his words, willing myself not to cry. I won’t fucking do it. A tear definitely doesn’t slip down my cheek. At all. “Please don’t make me.”
I want to say never. I want to reassure him. Instead, I close my eyes and snuggle deeper into his arms, letting sleep take me under.
It’s better this way.