Chapter 29
MILLIE
Shade drops me onto the mattress at the same time his words hit me.
I blink softly at him as he stands at the end of the bed, his huge frame hovering. I crawl back toward the headboard and claw at the blankets beneath me. The pressure between my legs is taunting me as I fight the urge to spread them in an invitation.
There’s desperate, and then there’s desperate. I don’t want to be the latter, and if I let him see how badly I really do want him—this—right now, I can’t guarantee that he’ll want to stay in here with me. Coming on too strong feels like the one thing that will have a man like him slipping away.
Instead, I try to slow my racing heart and watch him with a calm expression.
His jeans are already open, his black underwear showing where the zipper’s undone.
One tug on his belt loops and he’d be stripped of the jeans completely, but he keeps them on.
He keeps his eyes fixed on me, pupils expanding quickly.
It feels like minutes pass before I finally crack. “What are you doing?”
“Waiting for you to let me know you’re sure about this before I keep you pinned beneath my mouth for the next several hours.”
My lips part, a surprised breath escaping me. “Hours?”
His body lurches forward as he glares, but not at me. Shade curls his hands into fists before bending to push them into the mattress. My blood sings when I let my thighs relax and part slightly. He snaps his narrowed eyes to where I wanted them, and I bite my cheek, spreading my legs another inch.
“Millie,” he warns, voice garbled.
I shake my head, leaning up on my hands. “Teach me. Show me how to be comfortable enough to share this type of intimacy with someone.”
“Christ. That’s what I’m going to do, princess. Just need to try and not lose it in my pants first.”
My skin flushes worse than it already was. “You always say that.”
“Because you’re constantly pushing me there.”
“I’m not doing anything,” I say, lowering my voice.
“You do everything. Just don’t know it.”
“What if I want to watch you . . . lose it?”
Shade tips his head back and stares at the ceiling for a minute before tugging his shirt over his head and tossing it away.
The ring in his nipple becomes obvious now, and I fixate on it.
Then, I force my eyes away to the tattoos running up and down his torso before disappearing around his back and out to his arms. Blue, green, yellow, orange.
I wouldn’t be surprised if he bleeds colours.
There’s a blank chunk of skin over his sternum, though. An empty canvas amongst a lifetime of artwork. I stare at it as he settles his knees onto the bed and moves toward me.
“Why is it empty?” I ask, unable to help myself.
He hovers above me now, bulging biceps bracketing my head. “Haven’t found the right design yet.”
I touch his side, letting my nails follow the curl of the snake’s body from his hip to his back and then his middle. Shade tenses as I trace the tattoo, his jaw working as he stares down at me. His hips lower, pinning me into the bed.
Eyes flaring wide, I look up at him and hold still.
The entire length of him is obvious, pressing between my legs and pushing my dress up my body.
The corner of his mouth lifts as he leans to the side and brings a hand down to grab my dress, yanking it higher.
It clings to my waist, leaving my panties bared.
“Tell me what you want,” he says, gripping my thigh and guiding it around his hip. “This? Or something else?”
I choke on a reply when he presses against my panties, rolling against me. My eyes shut, my body starting to grow so tight I shake. Fingertips brush my jaw, then beneath my chin, before he’s pinching it.
His voice is airy, loose. “Eyes open as you tell me what you need.”
“Shade,” I whine, the sound so unfamiliar I force my eyelids open to make sure it didn’t come from someone else. “You know.”
“I do. But you still need to say it. Give me permission.”
Instead of speaking, I slide a finger through his belt loop and pull him harder against me, brows knitted together. I rub against the bulge he’s still grinding against me and exhale heavily.
“Words,” he asks, a bite to the word.
Frustration burns through me at my inability to ask for this. “How?”
“Tell me to get between your thighs and make you feel good, princess. Tell me how bad you want my tongue sliding through your pussy, licking up the mess you’ve made for me.”
“Please,” I whisper, my voice filling with embarrassment. “I can’t.”
He presses harder between my legs, gritting his teeth when I grab his side. “You can. The only thing stopping you is your fear of saying something wrong.”
I lose the ability to breathe for a few seconds when he takes my hand from his side and brings it to his crotch, pressing it hard against his erection. My fingers flex around the thickness, involuntarily squeezing.
“That’s for you. I want to taste you so fucking bad, Millie, that I’m going to need to get myself off while I do it so I don’t lose my goddamn mind and end up doing something I shouldn’t.
Nothing you say could change that or make me hesitate once I hear you tell me I can.
You’ll need to pull me away from you when you’ve had enough because I won’t want to stop,” he declares, eyes so dark they’re almost black.
“Oh, my God,” I breathe out, my core pulsing.
“Almost, but not quite.”
I focus on the heat of him beneath my palm and hold his stare. The need in his eyes is almost violent as he jerks in my hold, grinding into my hand.
“Please . . . please taste me, Shade. Lick my pussy,” I whisper, every muscle in my body locking up.
A rough, desperate groan floods from his lips before he’s pushing himself down my body.
My panties don’t last longer than a second before he has them ripped from me and on the floor beside his shirt.
I gasp and cry out as he takes both of my legs and shoves them up my stomach.
He keeps them there with a forearm tucked beneath them both and brings his mouth to my centre.
Hot breath fans across my sensitive skin, and then he hisses, “Prettiest pussy I’ve ever fucking seen, Millie. It’s perfect.”
The first swipe of his tongue through my flesh is electrifying, but the next—
“Shade!”
My hands move on their own. I slap at the mattress and tug the blankets viciously.
He spits on me, and every muscle in my body starts to quiver.
I can only see the mess of black hair from where he’s buried his face between my legs, and my legs block the rest of the view. He doesn’t let them go, though.
The first breach of his finger comes as he sucks on my clit, finding it without hesitation. I know he’s trying to make it easier to fill me, and it’s working. The pleasure is so strong it’s nearly too much.
“Taste even better than you look,” he grunts, swirling his tongue around my clit. “This is princess pussy, Millie. It’s too fucking rich for me, but I’m going to ruin it anyway.”
I moan low and long, nodding despite knowing he can’t see. It’s better this way. I can’t see his expression as I clench around his finger, needing more. Just . . . more.
Shade teases me with his teeth, the new sensation forcing my body to jerk against the bed, my legs straining where they’re pressed to my front. He growls against my core and wiggles a second finger in along the first. The stretch is what I was looking for.
“Want you to come like this before I fuck you with my tongue.” The demand scrapes up his throat, sounding painful. “Get my fingers wet before I let you gush all over my face.”
His dirty words ripple through me, pressing down on sensitive places that I didn’t know existed before right now.
I’m moving my hips now, rolling and jerking as I try and force his fingers deeper, wider, and his tongue faster.
He doesn’t make me beg. Reading me as if he’s inside my head, he gives me what I need without hesitation.
“Shade,” I warn, teeth tearing into my lip.
He moves his hand faster and taps the top of my walls.
I open my mouth, but no sound comes out.
Pleasure snaps at me with a ferocity that doesn’t leave me any time to prepare.
It’s savage, all teeth and brutal strength as it attacks me, ripping me open with an orgasm and leaving me scattered on the bed in pieces.
Shade moans against me, continuing to keep my clit trapped between his lips before finally releasing me. He lets go of my legs, and they fall instantly. Running his tongue over my swollen skin, he gently spreads my thighs and brings his second hand between them.
His dark eyes watch me over my stomach, the shine of my arousal on his nose and cheeks so obvious even with his tongue running over my slit. He pulls his fingers from where they’ve become wedged inside of me and sucks them off before lowering his mouth. I hold my breath, watching his every move.
“Do that again,” he pleads, his body shifting.
My core tightens viciously when his jeans slide down his thighs and settle at his knees. His boxers stay on, but he pulls his shaft out from inside of them. I gasp when I see the four black barbells along the underside where the empty holes used to be.
I tremble into the mattress, my thighs lifting slightly as I feel myself growing wetter. “What . . .”
Shade shuts his eyes for a moment, his hand gripping around his length, covering the piercings before gliding up once.
Without answering me, he releases himself and swipes his fingers through my pussy, covering them in my arousal.
Then . . . then he’s spreading it along his shaft, making it glisten.
When he opens his eyes, they snap to mine, dark and greedy. Desire leaks from his expression, and I know I look the same. By the time I let my breath go, it’s nothing more than a low noise of need.
“Give me one more, Millie. Then, I’ll let you run that pretty tongue of yours all over these piercings. Make you taste them so you don’t fucking forget this cock,” he grits out, stroking himself again, this time not stopping.
I don’t bother telling him there’s no way I could, even without the piercings. He already knows.
Lowering himself to his front, he blows on my pussy and uses his free hand to spread me. The first swipe of his tongue over my entrance is intense. I’m already so sensitive after one, but it’s not possible to turn down the promise of another.
Slowly, he digs his tongue inside of me and spears it deep. I keep my eyes fixed down my body, to where he has his shut, his mouth busy and arm jerking with his firm strokes. In this position, I can’t watch as he pleasures himself, but the noises he makes . . . I’m going to come too fast. Too soon.
His nose bumps my clit when he sucks at me and groans, lapping at my entrance with a vengeance. Like he’s desperate this will be the only time I let him do this.
My stomach burns at the reminder that he’s right.
“Millie,” he spits against me, eyes flashing up. “Need it. Need you to give it to me before I blow on my fucking sheets.”
A sharp lash of desperation and fear of losing my chance has me moving.
I bury my fingers in his hair and give it a brutal tug.
Shade curses and has no choice but to abandon my pussy and crawl up my body.
He keeps himself hovered above me, his fist still gripping his cock.
Adrenaline forces my demand up my throat, the threat of only getting one chance at this with him controlling me.
“Let me feel the piercings. Rub them over me,” I ramble.
His jaw looks rigid enough it could snap as he pries it open. “Jesus, Millie. Fuck, I can’t.”
“Yes you can. I trust you.” I curl my thigh around the back of his thigh and pull him forward. “Please.”
“Don’t. Move,” he demands sharply, already moving between our bodies.
His hand falls from his shaft. Hips together, he slides the length of him through my slit, getting it wet before retreating and doing it again.
I scrunch my face together and let my mouth fall open as I feel the piercings running along my pussy, each one bringing with it a new sensation.
My clit pulses, getting the perfect amount of pressure with his every glide.
“I’m—Shade . . .” I moan, tasting another orgasm on the tip of my tongue.
His eyes flash, mouth lowering until our lips brush, touching but not pressing. “Give it to me. Let me feel it like this.”
“Kiss me first,” I whisper.
He doesn’t hesitate. It’s brutal, another reminder of what we’re doing. There’s anger there, frustration too. I don’t know who it’s coming from, and right now, I don’t care. My core tightens, and then I’m coming, my hips lurching down violently.
Shade’s feral curse steals my breath as I feel the pierced tip of him press against my entrance. It doesn’t go inside. He brings his hips back, and before I can blubber an apology, there’s a new wet sensation against me. I roll my lips and watch as he comes, coating me in it.
“Shit. Shit,” he grunts, falling back onto his heels.
I can’t look away as he strokes himself a few times, more milky liquid spilling out the tip and down his knuckles. His hips jerk every few moments, and then he’s stilling.
I’m unable to think, let alone speak. He focuses on me, his chest heaving.
“You gonna punch me, princess?” he asks lowly.
My frown is immediate. “For what?”
“Getting too close.”
“That was my fault. No punching necessary,” I murmur.
He shakes his head, hair drooping over his forehead. “That was fucking reckless. Both of us were.”
My chest flushes as I push myself up the bed and close my legs. He watches me move, too freaking tuned in to me to miss a thing.
“It was only once. We won’t do that again.”
A muscle in his jaw ticks before he slowly gets off the bed. “Only once.”
“Right?” I ask before I can stop myself.
Idiot. Colossal idiot.
Shade freezes, turning his head to look at me. The coolness in his expression is all wrong. It’s a warning, and I hate the way I want to push right past it.
“Right, Millie. Your list is finished. That’s it. We’re done with the lessons.”
I don’t have anything to say. And when he realizes that, he heads for the bedroom door.
“I’ll clean up and bring you a towel.”
“Sure.”
Then he’s gone, and I’m alone, left to reel in silence. What could go wrong with that?