Chapter 37
Emalyn
“Are you sure this is okay?” Ronan’s mom asks him again, nervously handing over an overnight bag.
“I promise. You go take some time for yourself or hang out with friends. Dante will take you wherever you want to go, right?”
He narrows his eyes on Dante, who somehow ended up with the job of driving Ronan’s mother around town and buying her anything she touches, taking her to pedicures and dinner before a hotel room to enjoy herself and the spa.
“Right.” Dante clears his throat, using one finger to adjust his collar. For some reason, although he looks polished, there’s an air of danger that lingers around this man. More sophisticated than a wolf in sheep’s wool, less obvious. Yet, Ronan trusts him implicitly.
She leaves, after a few more hugs and reassurances, until Dante all but ushers her out of the building. I don’t miss the way his hard eyes soften, ever so slightly.
“Come on.” Ronan jerks his head toward the living room for James to follow him. “Come meet my nephews.”
The boys are staying with us while Alli and Tate are on their honeymoon, and they’ve made the living room the central hub for gaming. They have multiple consoles going and a stream of junk food. James’ eyes light up. Hudson is the first to notice him.
“Oh, hey, man. I’m Hudson.” He jumps up to fist bump, “What’s your name?”
“James.”
“Nice. This is my brother, Matty.”
“Hey.” Matty nods his head and tosses him a controller. That’s all it takes for them to chat away.
Ronan widens his eyes at me, gleefully pleased at how easily they got on. We expected some awkward hovering near the door or stumbling over words.
After about three hours, the gleeful expression melted into concern.
“We should get them off the screens.” I mutter toward him without looking away from them. They’re locked in.
“Ok. You tell them,” He nods, hands on his hips. My head turns to him slowly.
“What? Why would I be the one to tell them?”
“Cause you can threaten them with your shoe like you do to me. They’ll listen. You’re terrifying.” I shoot him a look and he quickly amends, “and beautiful. See? Now go handle those boys.”
Inhaling a deep breath, I stand in front of the TV. “Hey, time to shut it off, guys.”
They just lean around me, somehow not messing up on their game.
“Come on,” I urge, “The sun is shining. Let’s go outside and throw the ball with some of the other kids.”
They still ignore me. Which is very unlike them, considering who their parents are. They’re just in a trance, trying to beat this level together.
“Should we let them finish this one?” I ask, easily defeated and slumping into the barstool beside him. They know I’m not going to wield any shoes at them. That’s reserved for Ronan, and mostly because he likes to be on the other end of my shoe throwing.
“No.” Ronan’s shaking his head, a new determined look crossing his face. He squeezes my shoulder as he passes me and leans down to say, “We’re the grownups and they just have to listen.”
Rounding the counter and marching over, he pulls the plug on the T.V and is met with groans and Hudson standing up throwing his arms in the air.
“We were so close!” He groans dramatically on an exhale. James’ eyes ping pong between Ronan and Hudson, waiting to see how this will go and it breaks my heart. Ronan doesn’t notice, maybe because it’s been so long since he’s been in that position.
“I understand you guys want to beat that level. Let’s go spend some time outside and later we can try again.” He says calmly, never raising his voice. “Maybe we can play some basketball downstairs.”
“Oh, that sounds good. I’ll bring down some snacks too.” I say, already heading to the kitchen to chop fruit. The boys grumble the entire time they put on shoes and grab water bottles.
“Okay, let’s go party-people.” Ronan claps his hands together and leads everyone out.
The boys race to the elevator that takes us down to the courts while Ronan carries the picnic basket in one hand and wraps the other arm around my shoulders, pulling me close.
“Can you shoot a three?” Hudson asks James, who shrugs.
“I don’t know. It probably depends on how high the goals are.”
When we get down to the bottom floor, they take off to the rec rooms.
“Wow, enjoy it while you can. Before you know it, they’ll be off to college.” An older woman says with a smile as she passes us and exits through the doors.
Ronan frowns, glancing back at the kids, then me, before realization dawns on him. There on the side of the court, he sets the picnic basket down and pulls me to him.
“Oh, Sunshine.”
“It’s okay, Ro. Really.” I murmur, squeezing him back. “I accepted the no kids thing a long time ago.”
“It can still hurt, baby.”
“It really fucking does.” I sniff and pull away because this really isn’t where I want to get lost in my emotions.
The kids end up playing three against three with some other kids from the building, so Ronan and I sit along the edge, backs leaning up against the wall.
He pulls my feet into his lap and rubs gentle circles on my shins.
“You know… I’ve never really cared to be a Dad.
Didn’t have a good one and didn’t want anyone to depend on me like that.
” He murmurs, peeking at me. “But I would. For you. If being a mom was something you wanted to give a go, I think we’d be able to really love our kids.
If they feel even a sliver of the love you give me, Sunshine, they’d be the most loved kids on Earth. ”
My chin drops to my chest as I look down at my fingers.
“I can’t have kids, Ronan.”
“Emalyn. Look at me.” He cups my jaw, making me look at him. His expression is softer than I’ve ever seen it. “There is more than one way to be a mom. But only if it’s what you want.”
I open my mouth to speak, but he covers my mouth with one finger.
“Don’t answer yet. Let’s just talk about this in therapy— separately and together.” He brushed a curl behind my ear, “It’s only you for me, no matter what you decide about children, okay? I’m yours.”
“I love you, Ro.” I lean in, ready to kiss him when there’s a commotion.
Hudson and another boy are rolling around on the court in a mini-brawl.
“Oh shit.” Ronan jumps up, and I'm right behind him as he peels Hudson and the boy away from each other, keeping an arm on each of their shoulders as he demands, “What happened?”
“He called me the ‘B’ word!” The boy points to Hudson. Ronan looks to Hudson, who tilts his chin up.
“Motherfucker doesn’t start with a ‘B’,” Hudson squints his eyes as Matty snorts. James stands back, looking nervous. I go to him, placing a hand on his shoulder.
“Hey, why don’t we bust open this picnic while they sort that out?” I ask in a soothing voice, leading him away. He nods, following, but I don’t miss the way he swallows and glances back again.
“It’s because of me.”
“Hm?” I ask, pulling plates out of the tote bag.
“It’s because the kid was calling me dumb and making fun of my shoes.” He mutters, wiggling his foot that has a hole in the toe. It’s a hole smaller than a dime. “Hudson was standing up for me.”
“Good,” I say, placing food in front of him. His eyes flick to mine. He looks wary, as if trying to decipher if this is a test.
“Good?”
“Yep. You deserve to have friends in your corner. Although he shouldn’t cuss and tussle with them.” I shake my head. “Still, he’s a good friend. Looks like he’s decided you’re one of his.”
James grins, looking back over his shoulder. Ronan is bent down to Hudson’s height, looking him over. Hudson just tosses an easy grin and a thumbs-up over Ronan’s shoulder.
I shake my head, laughing silently.
“He’s crazy.” James laughs.
“Just like his Uncle Ronan.”