Chapter 27
CHAPTER
TWENTY-SEVEN
Sia
Why was I…smiling?
It felt weird to, and I honestly wasn’t sure if I would after I decided to approach Maxim.
But I was.
In fact, I couldn’t stop smiling. Especially when I studied Maxim beside me. We laid in the vineyard for a bit after he’d taken me, and I hoped I did everything right. The internet could only tell me so much, and being with him in that way had been different than I expected. There’d been choking involved.
There’d been blood.
I hadn’t really minded either, which was crazy, intense.
I wonder what that means.
I didn’t think too hard about that with his arms around me now. We were in his large bed, and he kissed me until we both relaxed into sleep. We’d taken a bath first, and there’d been aftercare. He enjoyed washing me and loving on me. That was so different than how he’d been outside.
I really couldn’t stop smiling. Especially since we had spent so much time in the bath. Maxim had said aftercare was very important to him, and he emphasized that again when we’d been in his tub. I’d never felt so cared for after he brought me into the house. He let me wear his shirt and everything.
My fingers grazed the dark hairs on his forearms. His hold on me was tight, steadfast. I tucked tighter into his embrace, and last night, I wasn’t sure about how I’d feel when I decided to try out what he was into. The anticipation of it all actually terrified me.
But once we’d gotten started…
Texting him had been thrilling. I’d read all about scenes on the internet. I figured I’d try that out by pretending to go missing, and I’d been exhilarated when Maxim played along. Honestly, I never felt like I had so much power. He hunted me, but I felt empowered. I got him to unleash a part of himself that was truly, well, himself.
And it’d been on my terms.
The grin was permanently plastered on my lips. Pivoting in his arms, I wanted to kiss him but didn’t want to wake him up. I was only ninety percent sure he’d go for something like last night with me. He’d been trying to pull back, and though I got the Lettie thing, I didn’t want him to retreat because he thought I’d be scared about who he was. He had a dangerous job and lifestyle yes, but if his darkness went deeper than that I wanted to at least put it out there to him that I was open to whatever that dark side was. I’d definitely gone out on a limb last night, and I was grateful I had.
I settled for playing with his dark hair instead of kissing him. He looked so peaceful as he slept, and I was pretty sure I scared the shit out of him last night by going missing. I knew I had actually because he had to make a few calls once we got inside the house. He’d snuck me into his room, then called his staff. Apparently, they’d been searching high and low for me.
It was crazy how in the beginning he acted as if he hadn’t cared for me. The urge to kiss him really snuck up on me now, but once more, I resisted. I wanted him to sleep, and he seemed to, deeply. He didn’t even move as I played with his hair.
He breathed in so deep as I did. Like he enjoyed that even in his sleep. I only let myself play for a few more moments before getting out of bed. Light was starting to appear through his window, which meant it was almost time for me to take Polly out.
I ended up putting on one of Maxim’s shirts on the way out. We’d both gone to bed naked. He’d taken me again there. We had sex the regular way this time, and it hadn’t been nearly as fun as outside.
I tried to think about what those thoughts meant as I grabbed a fresh pair of Maxim’s boxers to put on with the shirt. Outside wasn’t only fun, but there were so many things in my head I wanted to try. I was so new to all this, but I was intrigued with everything I discovered on the internet. I was so open, and I did wonder what that meant. I’d never really been physically rough with any partner I’d been with, and the prospect of that should completely horrify me.
I couldn’t help it with my history.
My thoughts continued to wander as I went outside with Polly. The house wasn’t awake yet, which meant the grounds were eerily quiet when I took Polly out. We did a long walk so I could think and get some fresh air. That ended up not being good enough because after I returned Polly inside I wanted more time. I decided to head out to the Petrov vineyards to get that, but as soon as I was there, I heard a crack in the leaves.
“Hello?” I backed up. I suddenly wished I hadn’t already taken Polly inside. There could be animals or…something. My hands curled. “Hello?—”
A hand covered my mouth from behind. It silenced my word and my scream, and I bucked.
At least, I tried to.
The world tilted, my vision clouding, blurring. I didn’t like being approached from behind and certainly not grabbed from behind. A panic attack on the horizon, I attempted to fight through it with a scream, and it audibly hit the air when I was tossed on the ground.
Pain instantly lanced my kneecaps, but I wasn’t on them long. A heavy force grappled me from behind, and I screamed again.
Oh, please, God, no.
I scratched at the earth, trying to scurry from beneath whoever was on top of me. I ended up flattening from the weight, and the panic really set in.
This can’t be happening. This can’t be…
But it was, my nails digging into the earth. A blade touched my neck at one point, and I knew I was calling out, screaming. Tears rushed my eyes, and I thought I was going to vomit. My panic literally brought chunks and bile up my throat. Whoever was on my back was going to hurt me. They were going to do terrible things, and that I knew in my heart.
My fight or flight couldn’t be helped. It didn’t matter that the person brought my arms behind me or even when they kicked my legs apart. I had to fight. I had to try , but that was made easier when the weight on my back suddenly left. The force on top of me had rolled off, and I turned around.
I blinked upon seeing the dirty man on his side. He was covered in brush and appeared greasy. He was also heavily tattooed from his face to his hands, and I realized I recognized him from the bar the night I ran away from the Petrov house. He was the man who’d hit me.
The one Maxim silenced.
He wasn’t looking at me currently. Now on his back, he scurried away with terror in his eyes. He got on his feet, but the moment he ran in the opposite direction, a blade lodged into his back.
Maxim hit him next.
He forced the man down to his knees with a single blow, another blade in his hands. He used it to stab the man in his ribs, and his eyes had changed. They’d gone darker, and when he twisted the knife, the man’s eyes beneath him changed too. They went white, blank.
Maxim didn’t relent. He twisted and twisted his blade and didn’t stop until the man fell forward beneath him. He collapsed, but even after that, Maxim didn’t stop. He took out another blade and shoved it into the man’s throat.
I covered my mouth, the blood rushing from the man’s wound over Maxim’s hand. The force had splattered blood all over Maxim’s face, but he hadn’t blinked. If anything, his eyes had gone just as vacant as the man’s but in another way. It was like he’d left his body too and became something else. Changed.
“Maxim?”
It was like my voice brought him back and all the blood faced me when he did. His dark hair was coated in it, his tanned skin. He wet his lips, and I flinched when he let go of the man. I think that had just been a natural reaction to the body, but the moment I had, Maxim cringed.
“Are you okay?” he asked me, his voice rough, unsure. The statement didn’t hold his normal confidence, and soon, he was looking at the man, at what he’d done. He faced me again. “Sia…”
“Yes, I’m fine,” I said, getting my thoughts back. I nodded. I was shaking but not because I was scared. I mean, I had been scared before, but now it was adrenaline.
Even still, Maxim put a little distance between us. He stared at the body again, but then, he was looking at me. He nodded. “Good, I…” He fingered his hair. His jaw moved. “I woke up, and you weren’t there.”
I wasn’t. I’d gone for a walk. I nodded. “I took Polly out, then went for a walk.”
His head bobbed twice in acknowledgement. He stared at the ground once more, but this time, that’d been because of me. There was a man dead before us, and I couldn’t help it.
Maxim’s lips thinned. “I don’t know how he got in. I’ll have to speak to someone. I was looking for you and came across him following you.”
This was clearly revenge of some kind, and it made sense after what happened at the bar.
I couldn’t help staring at the body. I mean, it was a body , and though I’d seen him kill before, it was still foreign to me. Maxim was still foreign to me. Who he was, was still different to me, but he didn’t scare me. In fact, the opposite.
I had a feeling that wasn’t how he perceived my reaction. A tension wrinkled his brow, and he backed up. He put more distance between us, but before he could do more, I moved.
He watched, his observant gaze on me when I not only approached him but pushed my arms around his waist.
Maxim sucked in a breath. He didn’t hold me back right away, and his blades were still in his hands. He swallowed. “You’re okay?”
I was more than okay. My fingers curled into his shirt. My head moved to nod against his rapidly breathing chest.
His head shook against mine.
“Use your words, malyshka ,” he said, and that term of endearment rolled through me. It was like an ethereal warmth, a haven. His breath went rough. “You’re okay?”
Pulling back, I looked at him. He scanned my eyes and so much worry was in his. Did he fear I had been scared by him? That I judged him for what he’d done? I could never. I pushed my fingers into his hair. “I am fine. I’m good. I swear.”
Maxim sagged in that moment. If it was from relief or something else I didn’t know, but whatever the case, he finally held me back.
He even dropped his knives.
Maxim held onto me with the force of a man who needed something. Like I was his version of an ethereal warmth.
Like I was his security.