Chapter 38
CHAPTER
THIRTY-EIGHT
Sia
I threw up that night, violently. In fact, I was so sick I sent word to Sophia that I wouldn’t be down for dinner.
I couldn’t face Maxim.
I couldn’t face anyone, and he came by my room later that night. I’d been scared at first that he’d just barge his way in, but he didn’t. He knocked. He respected me, and when I told him through the door I missed dinner due to my period he gratefully hadn’t stayed long.
What a cop out.
Was I aware I’d chosen the weak way out to avoid him that night? Yes, but I didn’t have the strength to speak to him.
I was too busy throwing up.
I had nothing left by the time I peeled my eyes open the next morning, and the only thing that got me out of bed was Polly. I took her out, got her fed and watered, then she came back with me to my room. We didn’t leave all day. We barely left for two days.
And Maxim was gone.
I’d gotten word from Val that he’d been called out of town on business and wouldn’t be around the house. He hadn’t even said goodbye, and I didn’t know how to feel about that. He’d done nothing but insert himself in my life for what felt like forever and now that he was gone I should be relieved.
I should be.
I shouldn’t feel frigid. Like I was two seconds from breaking knowing he wasn’t near. I hated that he’d filled a void once he’d returned from his last trip, and it hadn’t mattered that I was pissed off at him.
The only thing good about him being gone was that I could avoid school for the rest of the week without him questioning me. I couldn’t take the risk that Professor Handler would be there.
I’d been so stupid.
Of course, I knew that running into him was a possibility. I knew that he taught at that community college, but I figured I could avoid him by taking night classes. He was a daytime professor like he said, and I should have been able to avoid him.
You’re so stupid.
I felt ill every night I thought about him, and it was only Maxim’s return the following week that made me finally get ready for school when it was time. Maxim would ask if I didn’t go, so I was at his car at the usual time.
“Mr. Petrov is at Peters & Burg tonight, Miss Reynolds,” Jonathan, Maxim’s gardener, said. He smiled at me. “I’ve been instructed to take you to class myself this evening, if you’re ready.”
Jonathan was one of Maxim’s larger gardeners, and I didn’t miss the nine millimeter strapped to the man’s hip when he opened the door for me. Pretty much all Maxim’s hired help was strapped though. I guess it came with the territory regarding Maxim’s business, his life.
I guess Maxim was done playing pretend regarding school. He’d obviously had no interest and was only going to prove something to me.
I wasn’t sure what, and I hated that my heart did something when Jonathan told me he wasn’t around tonight. The only reason I found out Maxim was home at all was because I wasn’t sleeping lately and saw him roll in around three this morning.
His Mercedes had crept up the driveway, and I cracked opened my door with bated breath when he walked past my room. His head had been low, his hands deep in his pockets, but he hadn’t stopped. He kept walking right on past my room. He said nothing.
I guess he really was playing pretend, and I was too. I’d been pretending in my own way, and I think for a very long time.
I nodded at Jonathan, feeling haunted when he took me to class. Seth quickly got me updated on what I’d missed in class when I texted him from the car that I was coming back tonight, which was how I found out Professor Langston was still gone. Apparently, he was on paternity leave because he and his wife adopted a new baby.
This was great news of course, but it also meant our biology class had a temporary professor placement. The very thought made me sick. The placement could still be Professor Handler.
I lingered outside of the biology department after Jonathan dropped me off. I didn’t dare go inside but I needed to at least be on campus until my classes ended. Word might get back to Maxim that I didn’t go.
I didn’t know why I cared about that, and eventually, I decided to move away from the biology department buildings entirely. I thought I’d burn some time by going to the library or something, but I pulled a huge idiot move when I let Seth and our study group pass me.
“Sia, hey!” Seth said, and I silently cursed myself. I shouldn’t have been anywhere near the biology department if I didn’t want to see anyone I knew. Seth grinned. “So glad you’re feeling better. You’re on your way to class, right?”
I wasn’t, but I didn’t have a choice now.
Smiling, I nodded at them all and headed back toward the biology department with them. I felt more ill with every step and thought I’d faint by the time we all made it to our room.
I sat in my usual seat with shaking legs and ignored the fact that Seth approached Maxim’s seat.
“You know when Max will be back?” he asked, looking like he wanted to place his bag down on the desk, and I tried not to cringe that he shortened Maxim’s name. I didn’t know why that bugged me.
Probably because it bugged him .
I wasn’t dumb. I knew how much Seth and his sunshine energy pissed Maxim off. Maxim Petrov was a dark cloud and anything bright and sunny was seen as a threat. They were a violation that needed to be upended.
I told Seth he could sit there of course. Maxim wasn’t coming back.
I’d been lost when Seth continued to speak to me. I was lost in my head and couldn’t focus at all. It wasn’t until he mentioned Professor Handler’s name that I came back to the present…
As well as something else he said.
“Yeah, I guess they found his body over the weekend,” Seth said, and I had to do a double take. Surely, I hadn’t heard Seth right, but then some of our other friends chimed in and crowded around us.
“The news said it was a homicide. No leads, and it sounds like it was gruesome,” Georgia, one of our other study group members, said. She shivered. “The news didn’t give details, but some influencers I follow got the tea. They said Professor Handler was castrated. His hands were cut off, his eyes and tongue carved out... I couldn’t believe it when I heard it.”
Our group was abuzz, and my swallow was hard upon hearing what she said. My ears sparked hot. “His tongue?”
“Yeah, and like? What the hell?” Seth got his books out right around the time another professor came into the room. He announced himself as Professor Spears, and that he’d be taking over for the rest of Professor Langston’s paternity leave.
No one was really listening though. The room was just as abuzz as our group. Seth shook his head, his head low in my direction. “Someone out there is really fucking sick to do that to him.”
You should agree with him.
“Yeah,” I said.
You should nod.
I did that too, and my short responses seemed to be enough when Seth redirected his attention to the front of class. Eventually, our new professor got everyone to quiet down when they were clearly talking about a murder.
“Someone out there is really fucking sick…”
Sick was a grown man who preyed on children. Sick was when someone seemly kind brought a young girl into his home and pretended to be her savior. He pretended to save her from the system by giving her a safe home with him and his wife. And also sick was someone who snuck into that young girl’s room every night for a year…
He did until she made him stop.