Chapter 18
JARED
It’s been hours since she left. I can’t settle myself down.
When I realized I couldn’t feel her in my chest, I couldn’t relax.
So, I paced. I paced inside that bunker until it felt like I’d come close to using up all the oxygen in that small space.
I went outside and found her clothes, so I knew she’d shifted and gone for a run.
Because normal shifters need a run to clear their head, so I’ve heard.
But it’s been hours. Two, maybe three. And not being able to feel the connection to her in my chest after how upset she was is fucking with me. After just a couple of days of it being there and feeling strange and out-of-place it now feels wrong that I’ve got no sense of it.
And it’s been raining all night. Torrential downpour shit. So much that the floor just inside the bunker doors is soaked with half an inch of water.
Along with feeling wrong that I can’t feel her presence in my chest, I crave her scent.
There’s a big difference between the active scent of someone close by and the scent lingering where they’ve been. And not having her close has me feeling like I’m in the wrong skin. The blood in my veins even feels wrong right now.
Fuck it.
I don’t know how far she ran or how hard it’ll be to pick up her scent. With the amount of rain relentlessly pounding the ground out there, there won’t be tracks. But there’s no other option for me. I need to find her. Feel her presence in my chest, fill my senses with her scent.
***
It’s easier than I expected to find her.
Because I’m supposed to find her. And it rocks me straight down to my unstable foundation.
Despite the rain and the mud, it was a clear trail to where she is and where she is … it’s where I need to be.
It’s in the Arcana Falls village.
And now that I smell her nearby, I also feel her in my chest.
Maybe she went home because she’s done dealing with me and my bullshit.
I find myself standing outside the gas station. She’s here. But the place is closed, and all the lights are off.
Whoever is watching the footage of the surveillance cameras here might be tweaked at the sight of me. A guy running in a pair of shorts and sneakers with a muzzle on his idiot face.
Then again, anyone who would be watching would know what’s going on with me. My mate is here on the edge of the village, so I suspect as long as I don’t shift and go deeper into their town they won’t have to take me out as a potential threat.
She’s in the level above the store. There’s a small parking lot here so it’s all crystal clear now. Linc parked my trailer here, she asked questions he didn’t answer to her satisfaction, so the little brat got nosy.
I move to the back of the building where there’s a door.
It’s unlocked. I open it to a small entryway and a flight of stairs.
And this pisses me off. I know for a fact by the scents that this is her home.
I sure hope that upstairs door is locked.
There’s a table with a basket holding some mail.
Hooks on the wall holding hoodies, a jean jacket, and a leather jacket.
A shoe rack filled with her shoes. Flip flops.
Sneakers. Two pairs of high heeled shoes.
My erect dick cramps painfully with a vision of her long, shapely legs, a pair of these on her feet.
I’m ready to snap when I get to the top and find the top door also unlocked. Yeah, there’s surveillance outside, but it’s also the gateway to the village, making her the most vulnerable to outsiders.
I’m not prepared for what I see when I open the door. Also not remotely ready for how it makes me feel.
It’s reminiscent of the dollhouse my father built my sister. But every inch of it smells like Cicely.
It’s ultra-feminine, as if a Barbie doll lives here.
There are more throw cushions than a furniture store all over a sectional pink couch that takes up most of the living space.
The little kitchen looks like it came out of a magazine from the fifties with a rounded fridge, antique stove, and purple countertop.
Fucking purple. There’s a small diner-style studded table and chairs set done in pale pink.
In the middle of it sits a flowering plant in a sparkled gold vase.
The space is spotless. And full of colorful or sparkled accessories.
There’s a door open with a nightlight shining, and I make out a shower curtain the same color as her eyes, covered in smiling dolphins. I grab a towel from the hook and dry the rain from my body.
An oriental style room divider sections off where I know she now sleeps.
She’s on her side, sleeping in a nest of more damn pillows.
Nude. Wearing an ankle bracelet, and nothing else.
She’s freshly showered, smelling like berry-scented soap, and though she sleeps on top of the colorful quilt, it looks like she took the time to create a wall behind herself.
A wall of pillows against her back, resting on her.
As I absorb this, the foundation of my existence is rocked even further. In her nest, she created a shadow of my form. Because I should be here, behind her, holding her, a wall at her back protecting her and making her feel safe.
Fuck.
Fuck, fuck, FUCK!
And my chest as well as my gut feels almost right for the first time in hours.
Or maybe for the first time in a long while.
Because something is abundantly clear. Knowledge of why I exist. They say an alpha’s mate is made for him.
But the truth is that I’m made for her. I exist for her.
To warm her body, to provide for her needs, to serve her every want and need. This strong, beautiful female owns me.
I undress other than the muzzle and pluck the pillows off her body, tossing them before shoving some others aside.
I climb in, slide one arm under her and use the other to pull her small, warm, perfect form close.
***
I wake up feeling unusual. Warm. And except for this fucking thing on my face, right. I feel right in a way I didn’t know was possible. Because I’ve woken underneath the perfect blanket. She’s directly on top of me.
I’m on my back now instead of spooning her. But she’s here, now with her head on my shoulder, her hand on my chest. Our legs are twined together. And her beautiful icy blue eyes are open. Both my arms are wrapped around her.
She’s blinking, biting her bottom lip. Her eyes change. She sees I’m awake. And the softness in her gaze just about undoes me.
My left hand, already on her sweet ass reflexively squeezes.
Fire lights in her eyes and her hand slides up my pec to my neck.
“You can’t kiss me with that thing on your face,” she whispers.
“Also means I can’t bite you,” I rasp.
She pouts. And for some reason, laughter bubbles up from my gut.
Now there’s surprise in her eyes. She moves quickly, straddling me, rubbing the slick heat of her wet pussy up my already hard length.
“I like that sound,” she says.
I groan at how good this feels.
“I like this sound, too,” she adds.
She glides her hips back down before tipping her pelvis, angling herself to make sure my dick slides where it belongs.
Fuck, that feels right.
I grasp her hips and hold on while she rides me. She rides me slowly, with intensity and purpose in her eyes and in her movements. It all feels incredible.
“I want you to kiss me,” she whispers, pressing her lips against my neck as her fingernails trail up the back of my head. She’s got one of the straps.
“No,” I deny. “Not safe enough.”
“Jared,” she pleads.
“No,” I deny again. “You don’t even have the taser or the stun gun here, do ya?”
She pouts again.
I turn her to her back and rearrange her legs so they’re up high over my shoulders, and I thrust my hips forward, planting myself inside.
She arches, whimpering. “Yes. This.”
I set about both punishing and rewarding my stubborn mate, putting all my power into each hip thrust. She takes her fucking without complaint.
In fact, every stroke is met with the tightening of her sweet inner walls.
I revel in the feel of it, in how her legs are covered in goosebumps.
At how she looks at me, heat and emotion in her gaze as she reacts to the sensations she’s feeling.
I see her emotions, I feel them, and she’s happy.
She’s happy I’m here, happy I came for her.
I didn’t think I could give her anything good, but see and feel how much she needed this gesture from me, my demonstration that I want to be close to her.
For me it’s not just a want, it’s a need.
One I tried to deny. I’m not strong enough.
But fuck… I don’t want harm to come to her.
She grabs the cage of the muzzle as she comes, body shuddering, convulsing as she whimpers my name, calling me baby over and over.
Fuck, if I could only take this off and taste her skin. Suck her mate mark. Suckle between her thighs, feeding from her, believing that sweet honey will heal everything that’s wrong with me.
I rub her clit with one hand, twist her nipple using the other, and my knot goes frigid for a beat before it appears, making us moan in unison.
Her leg muscles contract and so do the muscles in her tight, hot pussy. I’m with her, both of us moaning, and the bliss goes on and on until ice shoots through my knot before turning to heat as my essence floods her.
When my knot releases, I roll to my side and pull her tightly to my body, tucking her head under my chin, wrapping my arms around her.
She squirms closer, one arm wrapping around my back before she sighs dreamily.
“Your apartment is fuckin’ ridiculous,” I mutter.
She goes stiff before she backs up enough to singe me with an indignant glare. “You. You’re ridiculous!”
I snort as she slaps my shoulder, trying to hide amusement behind a cute scowl.
I quip, “Like a Barbie doll lives here or some shit. Please tell me you didn’t decorate this joint yourself.”
“Every. Fucking. Inch.”
“Questionable taste.”
“In men too, apparently,” she fires back.