Chapter 19 #2
Shaking my head, I toed a few toys out of the way and headed over to her, tugging the blankets back to free her.
She flopped the rest of the way onto the floor, rolling until she faced the ceiling to blink at it a few times.
I let her stay there for a second and leaned over her to fix the fitted sheet on her mattress, tucking it back into the corners of the frame before tossing the blankets back on top and smoothing them out.
Her frown was a picture perfect mirror of her mother, dramatic and pitiful, while she stared up at me with her glassy-eyes and still slightly swollen face. “That bad, huh?”
Her frown merely deepened.
Across the way, a motion caught my attention, turning me away from her for half a second as I caught Silas settling himself against the door frame.
Lacking his coat, his toned muscles bulged slightly when he crossed his arms over his chest again.
His tattoos were dark impressions in the dim lighting from Ainsley’s single lamp in the corner, casting interesting shadows over him that made him appear both slightly ominous and alluring.
There was a subtle twist to his lips that I couldn’t help but stare at. It softened him a bit, took him away from that stone-faced demeanor he usually wore like a second skin and draped him into something more... human.
I liked it. Whatever side of Silas this was, I wanted more.
Get it together.
“All right. Up you go.” Turning back around, I tugged her up from the floor with a small grunt as she went completely limp—a cute little trick I didn’t remember either Amelia or I teaching her that had become her favorite default the second she wanted to object to the current circumstances.
She sagged like a ragdoll, crumpling into her mattress when I finally got her back onto it. Sinking to my knees, I tugged her sheet and two blankets up to cover her, rolling her onto her back in order to pull them up and tuck them under her chin.
“There you go. Sleep tight, okay?
“Bedtime book?” she asked.
“Not tonight.”
Her face scrunched up instantly.
Fuck...
I’d warned him ahead of time and here I was the one wincing at the inevitable screech that was about to assault me. “Ainsley.”
Two hundred decibels for a rocket launch, right?
This was about to be a whopping two hundred and twenty.
She sucked in a quick intake of air, her eyes growing watery again. Her lips peeled back while she worked herself back up, a strangled noise simmered in her throat right at the precipice of her wailing again only to be cut off by the sound of jingling keys.
What the—
I turned just in time to see Silas moving away from the door and heading over to us, a ring of his keys being held up in the air as he shook them gently. They clinked together in a soft array of sound, creating a pleasant chime.
“She’s not a dog, Silas.”
He squatted down next to me, one arm resting on his thigh while the wrist of his other flicked the key ring deftly. He held it up just high enough to catch Ainsley’s attention, her eyes locking onto it immediately. “Well, it’s clearly working. So, you’re welcome.”
This man...
“I’m going to take a stab in the dark and wager you’ve never been around kids before.”
“I’m around plenty of kids all day, every day at work.”
“That doesn’t count when they’re unconscious on your table.”
He shifted his gaze over to me. “I do my own rounds.”
“Yeah, and how often do you delegate the kid’s rooms to the nursing staff?”
His lip quirked up slightly, amusement trickling back into those sharp blue irises. “Only if they’re annoying me.”
“So, all of them.” With Ainsley being distracted, it gave me enough time to lean over and tap on her sound machine. The soft, peaceful noises of rainfall cut through the jingling, bathing the room in a hushed calm.
His fingers snapped around the keys, silencing them immediately.
“Mom will be here in the morning when you wake up,” I said, leaning back to smooth a hand over her forehead. Her lashes fluttered, one small sniff leaving her before she let them finally close.
Neither Silas nor I moved in the three and a half minutes it took for Ainsley to finally give in to her body’s exhaustion and let sleep take over.
But the second her chest began to rise and fall slowly, we both quietly scrambled to our feet and headed out the door, slipping through the doorway as stealthily as possible.
I snuck my hand through the crack where I’d left the door open a little to flick off the light in her room, pulling it back out with a soft sigh of relief when no other sounds other than the noise machine could be heard coming from inside.
Using my shoulder, I nudged Silas back down the hall and into the living room. He went easily, his hand shoving deep into his pocket to stow away his keys while navigating through the destruction of what I’d left the living room in before taking Ainsley for her bath.
“Sorry about the mess.” Three weeks ago, I would’ve been absolutely mortified for someone like him to see any of this, to get a small little glimpse into the truth that came with raising kids—messy and unfiltered—that not many single people got to experience before taking the faithful leap into parenthood themselves.
By now, though, I figured there was no harm in being honest. My life with my sister and niece wasn’t going to be changing anytime soon and neither was the disarray and chaos that came with it.
It didn’t seem like Silas was exactly running for the hills like I thought he would have by now and had surprised me with how unconcerned he’d acted back at the hospital.
I wanted to believe it was a good sign, that whatever this relationship between us was, wasn’t going to be done and over with in a month. I’d grown far too attached to this man to be okay with calling it quits before figuring out where he stood on the proverbial spectrum.
As much as I’d been worried about his potential indifference, all of that had been thrown out the window three hours ago.
Banning me from going out on calls by threatening to tie me up.
Who did that other than someone genuinely concerned?
He wasn’t the type to heavily invest that much in every other patient. I was a special case, and not simply for the fact of us sleeping together once before.
Things went deeper than that. They had to. I wouldn’t accept less.
Silas bent to pick up a few toys, examining them while I grabbed the empty bin over by the front window and set it down at his feet. “These are quite... colorful.”
He held a pair of soft plastic rings looped around his long fingers, all varying sizes that accompanied the yellow peg base clutched in his other hand. He tossed them one by one in the bin, managing to loop the smallest ring around the peg.
Laughing, I scooped up a few half-dressed dolls off the floor, the rest of their outfits mysteriously missing.
“Wait until you see her kitchen set. It’s got an oven, microwave, sink, and pantry.
I swear, it’s nicer than the one we actually have.
I half joked with my sister about using it as a diorama for when we remodel the kitchen. ”
“Easier than commissioning a designer to do it for you.”
“And cheaper.”
He snorted softly, bending to grab a few playing cards my niece had gotten a hold of and tossed around the living room during the movie.
Flower petals at a wedding had been the scene she’d danced around to, mirroring the flower girl walking down the aisle with her little white basket, tossing rose petals as she went.
I found it adorable how absorbed Ainsley got into things. An adventurous spirit who was determined to experience everything at least once.
Maybe in the next few years, if my sister did end up finding someone to settle down with, Ainsley would actually get to live out that little fantasy.
“I don’t hate kids, if that was what you were implying earlier.”
Turning to look back over at him, surprise danced in my chest. “I wasn’t trying to offend you or anything.”
“You didn’t.” His back was facing me while he squatted, picking up the cards one by one and stuffing them back into the holder. “But I wanted you to know, regardless.”
I worked the inside of my cheek with my teeth.
Why else would he care to tell me something like that unless he wanted to reassure me he wasn’t going anywhere?
Only a sociopath played up the future while having no intention of following through with the illusion they were creating.
Silas was far from that. I’d come to discern that much over the past few weeks of knowing him.
Deep down, he was a compassionate person who simply had an odd way of showing it.
Untailored and raw in how he saw the world, and he was never afraid of speaking his mind no matter how harsh the sentiment.
At some points, I might have appreciated his delivery to be a little more careful, but at the end of the day, the honesty was refreshing.
I had a thick skin, had to when living in the city and under the same roof as an abusive alcoholic. So, most things that came rolling off this man’s tongue hardly ever caught me in a moment of true vulnerability.
Though, I had a sneaking suspicion even if he did find himself around me when I was in the middle of some breakdown, he’d be far more tender. His care was shielded by his callous nature, yet that didn’t mean it wasn’t there.
Stepping around a few plushies knocked over on the carpet, I came up behind him to set both of my hands down onto his shoulders. He slowly lifted his head and tilted it back to look at me, curious.
“Is this you offering to babysit?” I asked, teasing. An underlying test lingered between my words.
Not that I was looking for someone to come around and act as a free babysitter while Amelia and I went about our busy lives, especially with his work schedule, however, I was dying to know where exactly his line in the sand was drawn.
How far into my personal life was he willing to invade?
How far did he want to be let in?