Chapter 14
Maya
Every word out of Soren’s mouth takes me by surprise, but none more than the inclusive term let’s. As in us. As in together. He’s staying. When he shouldn’t.
“What do you mean?”
“Let’s Elf this place.”
I bite the inside of my cheek. “Did you just use a movie as a verb?”
He scratches his beard, hiding a smile. “Affirmative.”
“I always knew you were a big softie.”
He tilts his head to the side and frowns. “Don’t you ever say that again.”
“Now that I know how much you love it, how can I resist?” I chuckle. “But I’m in. Where do we start?” I should shove him out the door, but here I am, laughing with him again. Heaven help me, maybe I want him to stay for Christmas.
“Hmm…” Soren drums his fingers on his leg. “Lego scenes? Wood carvings?”
“Are you adept at creating immaculate designs with either of those materials?”
“Not particularly,” he admits, already sensing the major flaw in his plan.
“I have a better idea. Follow me.”
He practically jumps out of his seat. Is he… excited?
I stand much more slowly since my headache is returning.
I leave the room, aware of how closely he follows.
His gaze burns through my spine as we walk up the stairs to the smallest top floor.
I open the last door on the left, then lead him to the small attic right across the tiny hallway from my cubicle of a room.
But… I’ve lost him.
“What’s in here?” he asks.
I whirl around to see him reaching for the doorknob to my room.
“Nothing!” I dart in front of him, ducking under his arm and plastering myself to the door to prevent entry.
“Ah,” he says in an irritatingly knowing voice. “Your room. What? Do you still have pictures of the Jonas Brothers on your wall?”
I jut out my chin. “I could. They’re making a comeback.”
He still hasn’t removed his hand from the doorknob, so by default his arm is around me. I can’t take a full breath or my chest will brush his.
“There was only supposed to be one room up here,” he says, as if thinking out loud.
The floor was remodeled to make two rooms, mine being far smaller than the other. It was like they forgot they needed a place for a nanny and dug out a cave for one as there are no windows or a closet. But how did Soren know this? “Did you study the blueprints or something?”
“Yes.”
“Well, aren’t you a thorough thief?”
“Preparation is the key to success.”
“And how is that working for you now?” My eyes glint, but he doesn’t take the bait, only smiles.
“I’m getting much more than I came for.”
“But not what you need.”
“I haven’t given up hope yet. Let’s see what’s behind door number two, shall we?
I put my hands on his chest and shove, but he doesn’t even budge. Instead, he turns the doorknob.
“Stop!” I press myself against him, but I feel like a mouse trying to stop a giant. I grab both sides of the doorway, using my body to hold him back.
“What are you hiding from me, Maya?” His voice is deep and husky, and all of the sudden I can’t hold on anymore, because I don’t want to.
He doesn’t deserve to have exclusive access to my life, but it only matters if I let it.
I have a million things I’m hiding from him, but none he will stick around long enough to care about.
“Fine.” I release the doorframe. “Nothing will stop you from taking what you want and destroying my life again, will it? So if that’s what will make you happy, then do it.”
His hold on the door drops, and he steps back, his expression hardening. “You seem to think I didn’t suffer.”
I don’t want to think of him suffering the way I did eight years ago.
I’ve tried so hard not to think of him at all.
But now my mind won’t stop replaying the past, wondering where I went wrong.
Because that is the only solid explanation I’ve come to.
I wanted too much from him, and he couldn’t take the pressure. “I know you didn’t.”
“You don’t know everything, Perfect Perry.” His detached tone rakes against the inside of my rib cage. He reaches for the doorknob again, but this time he pulls the door shut behind me. “Relax. Your Jonas Brothers poster is still safely rolled up on the bed.”
I cross my arms as a chill sweeps over me. “Good. That’s where I like them.” I open the door a crack to lock it and shut it again, but when I turn around, Soren is by the other door, waiting patiently, but avoiding my eye.
I walk across the hall and open the door, flicking on the lights to reveal the madness.
“What is happening here?” Soren asks, stopping just inside the doorway.
I glance around the room that’s so crowded and colorful it’s nauseating. “I think this is where they keep everything they’ve outgrown. That or Bella ordered things and hid them here.” That’s the only explanation for some of it.
“She can do that?” he asks, stepping into the room and wandering through the maze of crazy.
“She has her own credit card.”
“Of course she does.”
“She has a five-thousand-dollar monthly limit.”
“That’s it? Are they monsters?” He chuckles, knocking on the head of a life-size Chucky doll. “All we need is a Santa hat, and this can go by the fireplace.”
I hate that doll. But… “She would love it.”
“All right. You grab the unicorn, and we’ll make it a sleigh.”
After an hour of lugging oddly shaped, oversized toys down from the attic, we have a life-size toy box. A dream for any child—minus the ten-foot skeleton decorated with lights and the Chucky turned Santa.
There’s a small carousel, two of the three seats occupied by a giant teddy bear and a smaller stuffed gorilla.
We pushed the couches and chairs out of the way, and in their place is a full-size bounce house.
Not one of those little five-kids-max ones.
This one is top dollar. There’s a small pool filled with a couple of inches of water and floating Barbie heads.
To top it off, there’s a small climbing set and a rope swing Soren looped around a banister from the second floor. Over, under, and around everything are all the Christmas lights we could find.
“It’s insane. And perfect,” I say, stepping back to take in our work. My heart is beating hard with the joy and the satisfaction of pulling this off.
“Are you going to hide in the giant stocking?” he asks, holding it up.
“No way. That’s where she kept the snake after she attempted to kill Mrs. Murray. They never found the snake after that.”
“Yikes.” Soren grimaces and drops the edge of the stocking on the floor. He tugs on the disk swing, ensuring it’s safe, then sits on it, holding the rope. I walk over and give him a shove. He’s heavy, and I’m weak, so he doesn’t swing far. He hops off and brings it to me. “Your turn.”
“I’m not a child.” I laugh.
“But something tells me you could use some fun.”
I could. I really could. But I’ll feel ridiculous. “It might hurt my head.”
“I’ll get you some more medicine.” He grabs my hand, and for a moment I forget all the reasons I’ve been pushing him away.
His touch is gentle, and I give in to its spell.
I sit on the disk, and he grabs the rope, pulling me back.
And then he lets me go. I haven’t been on a swing for years and am surprised when my stomach swoops like I’m on a rollercoaster instead of a child’s toy.
A laugh bubbles up, and I lean back, enjoying the ride. This is oddly stress-relieving.
The disk spins, and as I come back around, I face him.
“I like when you smile… and you aren’t trying to kill me.” He grabs the rope, then catches me around the waist, holding me in place.
“Maybe you should stop giving me reasons to want you dead.”
“I don’t know if I can; I’m pretty irritating.”
My lips twitch, and I fight back a snarky response and allow myself to meet the gaze of the man I once loved.
How we’ve changed since then.
Without warning, he releases his hold on me, and I fly away from him. Watching him slip away feels familiar and disappointing in a way it shouldn’t.
My head has had enough thinking and swinging. I put my feet on the floor and step off, keeping hold of the rope as my dizziness fades.
“I’m not perfect, you know.”
“Oh, I know.” His lips quirk. “I saw your little ‘bad girl’ earring.”
I choke on air meant to revive me and focus on his taunting eyes. “My what?”
He steps closer, brushing the hair over my left ear. “This one.” His featherlight touch brushes the top of my ear. “And these.” He tugs lightly on my gold hoops.
“These are common piercings.” I stutter on the words as butterflies race down the left side of my body.
“Not for you.” His eyes are intense, like he can see more than he should—probably because he can. I’ve always been terrified of needles, so getting not one, but three holes in my body took some bravery.
“I remember everything.” His words from earlier hit me again, harder this time.
“Is there a story there?” he asks so softly it’s like a caress, a gentle nudge to open up. He knows me, and it feels good to be remembered, even if I’m still mad at him.
The distance between us grows smaller, but I’m not moving.
My eyes find his lips. What would it be like to kiss him after all this time? Would it be a raging fire? Or would there only be ashes where there used to be flames?
I want to test the waters—grab his hand again, run my fingers over his jaw.
“Maya…” His voice is low and rough, desire hidden within the resistance. But he won’t let himself give in to it. I can see it in his hesitancy to really touch me. Just like last time, he’s already one foot out the door.
I take a step back, ripping myself out of his magnetic orbit.
“My roommate stole my boyfriend,” I blurt.
Soren blinks. “That’s… terrible?”
I keep backing up, and as I go, my mouth spews words I can’t keep inside.