Chapter 14
Tore Hansen
Ihad known from the start that I wouldn’t be getting any sleep, especially because when you were my height and size, sleeping anywhere but a king size bed would always prove difficult.
Plus, I could feel Effie’s concern radiating off of her, and it was making me anxious, my eyes on the large medical center window as quiet breathing sounded around me.
Our group had all but taken over the center, along with Aaren and his pack, who were now sleeping on the floor of the room Ruby was in.
I hadn’t fully agreed on calling them, but no one else had seemed to feel the same.
I also had almost insisted on going home, but when Effie told me she wanted to stay, I knew there was nothing to do but give her exactly what she wanted. Effie’s loyalty despite her having been wronged so often was something I found beautiful.
Currently, my mate was curled up with her head on my lap and stretched out along the large bench, her light breathing letting me know that she was not sleeping well either.
I had a feeling that she was waiting for any sign of Ruby’s health improving, and until that occurred, she would be at least partially awake.
My fingers brushed through her silky hair, and I considered wrapping it around my fist just to see what it would look like, but I knew that would result in imagery I couldn’t afford.
Like the idea of my hand gripping her hair while I bent her sweet ass over and railed into her.
A rumble escaped my throat, imagining just how good she would look, especially looking back at me with those massive, heat-filled eyes.
Shit. I really needed to figure out how to get myself under control.
“Tore?” Effie looked up at me with a sleepy expression, stretching her arms above her head as my eyes darted down her frame.
A growl caught in my throat, wanting desperately to cage her against the bench and run my lips over her soft skin until she was squirming underneath me, begging me to make her come.
Though she never had to beg me to do that—it would be a goddamn honor.
“Lil bit.” I brushed her hair gently through my fingers. “Are you uncomfortable? I can move off the bench.”
“No.” She offered me a small smile. “I like laying on you.”
Fuck. I wanted her to lay on every inch of me.
Don’t get me wrong, I understood why Caedmon needed her at night—the fucker barely slept, and I knew he had nightmares—but I wanted to be selfish as well.
I wanted to wrap her up and bury my nose against her neck so I could sleep completely surrounded by her scent.
Effie frowned then. “Is she okay? Have we heard anything?”
“Nothing yet.” I shook my head as she slowly sat up and looked around, her eyes focused on the large window I’d been staring out.
“It’s snowing,” Effie murmured. “That’s beautiful.”
It was beautiful. The medical center was placed near the pier, so you could see the light snow falling over the frozen lake.
It wasn’t a storm or anything like that, so nothing obstructed the snow from falling from the sky in cascading patterns.
Effie was staring at it with longing, so I urged her to stand as she offered me a confused look.
Shrugging off my jacket, I put it over her delicate shoulders and led her into the hallway outside of the small waiting room we’d been resting in. The medical staff had pretty much closed that area off, so when we stepped into the main lobby, the front attendant looked up in surprise.
“We are just stepping outside for a minute,” I explained. Effie was tucked against me, her gaze completely on the glass door up ahead. I could practically feel the excitement radiating off of her.
“Just knock when you need back in, we lock the doors at night.” She offered an understanding smile, and Effie nearly sprinted out the door, my smile growing.
The minute the door opened, a wave of cold air greeted me and breezed through her hair.
I couldn’t contain my chuckle as Effie did a little spin and put her arms out, as if catching the snow. This was worth the lack of sleep.
“Now this”—she motioned skyward—“is the type of snow my wolf and I can agree on. It’s so peaceful out here.”
It was. It was that peaceful silence that always accompanied snow, and the sky was almost light, filled with heavy clouds, as each snowflake fell down onto my gorgeous mate.
The streets were empty, and everything seemed to freeze in space as Effie walked towards me, my heart squeezing almost painfully.
Damnit, the woman was so perfect.
This was how I always wanted to exist, with this peace and happiness on Effie’s face. When she stepped up into my space, my fingers crawled onto her hip.
“Why are you smiling?” she teased.
“Because I love seeing you this happy,” I admitted easily.
Her eyes went wide as she leaned into my chest and nuzzled against me. “Thank you.”
“Thank you?” I frowned in confusion while cupping her jaw. “What for?”
“For caring about how happy I am,” she whispered softly. “I’ve never really had that before.”
Intertwining our fingers, I gently led her down the snow-covered path that followed the large pier area, my nerves acting up as I considered asking something I’d wanted to know for a bit now.
“You said you don’t remember anything before the Whitepaw Pack?”
Effie’s eyes shaded with sadness. “Sometimes I feel like I remember flashes of moments…but then when I try to focus on it, it's like I am misremembering. It always feels out of reach.”
“What’s the first memory you have?”
“Walking alone in the city.” Her lip dipped as she tried to hide it. “I was so cold and in so much pain. I was so happy to find myself in a warm building that I passed out in the foyer.”
I didn’t like that at all.
She continued, “Sometimes I wonder if there has been someone out there looking for me…but that is probably just me being hopeful.”
“Hopeful?”
“I’ve never had a family. Not a real one.” She shrugged, her face portraying her sadness. “But I try to tell myself I am not missing out on too much.”
I hesitated. “Having a family can be good, but at the end of the day, they make mistakes and have motives like the rest of us.”
“Motives?” Her brow dipped.
“Yeah,” I sighed. “When I killed my sister’s mate, my parents sent me away because of the backlash they were getting.
Instead of getting upset about her death, they were more worried about the balance in our pack and mourned her quietly.
Now they want me to come home, but not for the right reasons.
I don't want anything to do with that pack. Not then, and definitely not now.”
Effie looked up, seeming to consider something. “Do you… Do you regret killing someone?”
That wasn’t the question I’d thought she would ask, but one I was happy to answer nonetheless.
“No,” I answered immediately with a quiet tone to soften the impact. “I would kill anyone that hurt someone I loved. I can’t regret that.”
Effie squeezed my hand. “I understand that. I shouldn’t, but I do… The idea of anyone hurting you guys makes me so angry.”
My chest squeezed, realizing what she was implying as I pulled her to a stop and grasped her jaw lightly.
“Lil bit, if anyone ever tried to hurt you, they would be dead. I am barely hanging on from killing Dr. Hastain, and all he did was say some stupid shit.” That wasn’t including Gerald, who I very much planned on paying a visit to.
Her eyes widened. “You would kill him for me?”
“Effie, you have no idea what I would do for you.”
She should, though. She really, really should.
Effie’s lips pressed together as a pink flash went through her eyes. “Is it bad that I want to know?”
“No.” I brought a thumb against her lip and brushed over it gently as she trembled, the scent of her desire wrapping around me.
She swallowed. “You said everyone has motives.”
“They do,” I admitted.
“What’s yours?”
“To make you happy,” I immediately said before exhaling. “To figure out what makes you tick, to be a good mate… Fuck, just to give you whatever you want Effie. I have no idea what you’re doing to me, and I have no idea how to make sure I don’t fuck up—”
Effie went up on her toes and slammed her lips against me, pulling a throaty rumble from my throat.
I fucking loved that she was becoming more confident in physicality, because I needed all of it from her.
Everything from holding her hand to falling asleep together with her body curled up against my own.
I pressed a hand to her lower back to pull her fully against me, my hard cock pressed against her soft stomach. I cupped her jaw and deepened the kiss as she let out a small whine from her throat.
That sound fucking rocked me to the core, and I backed her up until she was against the wall of a nearby building. The way her hands gripped my sweater was eager, and I had to fight the urge to tug off her clothes just to have more access to her skin.
When I finally pulled back, her breathing was fast and her pupils blown as she looked up at me with snow-covered lashes. Her cheeks were flushed, and I couldn’t help but press my lips to hers once again, needing to taste her one last time.
“What was that for?” I asked while pressing her forehead to my chest, a hand wrapped around the back of her neck and holding there.
“I just needed you to know how much your words meant to me,” she whispered before offering me a small smile.
“I never thought I would have this with anyone, let alone someone as perfect as you… I don’t want to lose you, Tore.
I am worried that you guys will leave SFU and go back to your families, and if that happens, I have no idea what I would do. ”
“I will never leave you, and you will never be alone again,” I vowed.
Effie nodded as her eyes flashed again, her hands tightening on me.
“What?” I could feel her energy hyping up.
“My wolf wants to shift,” she said with a small, almost embarrassed, smile. “She is very eager to meet you, especially because she said our human conversations are boring.” I wanted nothing more than to meet her wolf—I had since first being able to sense her under Effie’s skin.
I barked out a laugh and stepped back. “Shift then.” Looking around, I added, “Do you need to change out of your clothes?”
“No.” She shook her head as magic suddenly began to radiate off her, pink and blue surrounding her, as she closed her eyes.
When she shifted, I felt my magic surge out and spread, the snow seeming to grow harder and more icy…
Before Effie appeared out of the glowing light that had me absolutely transfixed.
In my time at SFU, I had seen many individuals shift, but I had absolutely never experienced anything like Effie’s transformation into her animal counterpart.
Goddess, she was fucking adorable.
I’d known Effie was a type of arctic wolf, but the tip of her tail and ears were painted in colors similar to her hair, the wind ruffling them as she opened her eyes to reveal a bright pink, curious gaze.
I crouched down as she approached me, the snow crunching under her small paws as she tipped her small head up.
“You are perfect.” I ran my hand around the side of her body as she let out a small bark and nuzzled her head against my cheek, making my chest warm. When she suddenly jumped back and started running in the snow, a chuckle left my lips, loving how happy she seemed.
I jogged after her down the pier, and I realized that for the first time in a very long time, I felt happy too. Unapologetically happy and relaxed.
So much so that when she finally shifted back, I caught her up in my arms, both of us falling back into the snow. I rolled us so that she was on top and her legs came on either side of my hips, her smile intoxicating and eyes filled with so much happiness that it killed me.
A wave of emotion slammed into me, and I found myself saying words I never would have expected. I should have though. I should have because of the strength of emotion I felt towards her.
“I’m in love with you.”
Effie’s eyes widened. “What?”
I swallowed the concern that she would reject me, knowing it was a possibility, but wanting to say it anyway.
“I know it’s too soon, but I’m falling in love with you.
Fuck, I am in love with you, Effie. I just can’t get enough of you…
I don’t know how else to say it besides that I’m in love with you. ”
Her eyes welled with tears. “I’ve never had anyone say that to me.”
It was that simple though.
“Tore,” she whispered, “I’ve never been in love before.
I don’t know if I am doing any of this right…
But I feel a connection with you that I didn’t think was possible.
I think about you all the time. I always want to be around you, and I find myself wanting a family with you, with all of you… I love you, Tore. I really love you.”
“Fuck, Effie,” I groaned, tightening my grip on her. “Those words out of your mouth are fucking perfection.”
“Yeah?” she teased, leaning down and nipping my lip lightly as my cock pulsed underneath her.
“Now what is this about a family?” I rolled her over and caught her against the snow as she stretched underneath me, my knee pressed between her legs.
Her cheeks flushed. “I mean…I would like to have a family one day together. Not because of all this weird mating stuff the President keeps talking about, but because I want to never be that alone again. I want to experience all the holidays and fun stuff that I see in movies, also.”
“In the movies?” I murmured, still caught up on her wanting to have kids with me one day… I couldn’t even tell you what the hell that did to my head.
“Yeah, I never have had a Thanksgiving or real Christmas.” She shrugged. “Plus I like the idea of having little ones that we can protect.”
A rumble broke from my throat. “You would have babies with us?”
“I mean, I’m sure there is some stuff that comes first…” She blushed. “But yeah.”
Fucking hell. That did so many different things to me, I couldn’t goddamn handle it. I brushed my nose against hers. “Effie, I am going to keep my promise and give you whatever you want, always.”
Especially if it meant tying her to me forever.