10. Ethan
10
ETHAN
I reluctantly pulled away from Lily and left her sprawled on my bed. I grabbed my pants and shirt and yanked them on hastily as I headed for the door and slipped out. I knew when Mom moved in here that it would be a lot of work, and most nights, it didn't bother me at all, but those nights, I didn't have anyone over. Tonight was the first time since the switch happened and Dad went to the home where I felt emotionally burdened by Mom's presence here.
I walked up the hall barefoot, fixing my shirt so I looked presentable as I headed toward her room. Having my mother live with me hadn’t been any issue at all before now. I knew she needed me, and I'd decided to make that sacrifice. She and Dad took care of me all the way through medical school and for a few months after residency when I was looking for my full-time position at St. Anne’s. Now it was my turn. I just wished it wouldn't affect my time with Lily.
"Hey, Mom," I said when I walked into her room. She was sitting up after I'd already helped her lie down for the night.
"Oh, Ethan, I'm so clumsy. I dropped my medication and I can't find it. Can you please help me?" She looked down at the carpet beneath her feet and frowned, and I sighed.
"Yes, I can help." I walked over to her and dropped to all fours as I swept a hand under the edge of her bed. She was used to getting her own medication, but there were nights when her arthritis flared up and I had to open a bottle or, like tonight, she dropped something she needed. She couldn't get down on the floor anymore without help getting back up, so it fell to me to aid her on nights like this.
"I'm so sorry, dear. I didn't mean to interrupt your evening with Lily." That was the good part about having her here and not Dad. She was at least considerate about my time and privacy and felt bad for imposing on me. Dad would have milked it for all it was worth. But his health conditions demanded twenty-four-hour care, which I couldn’t provide, and he refused to have nurses come into his home. So he stayed at the retirement village.
"It's okay, Mom. I understand, and so does Lily." I found the pill bottle and picked it up. There was no way she could have gotten it herself, and with it being her blood pressure medication, it was important. I was glad I snuck away to help her. I handed it to her. "Do you need anything else?"
"Nothing in particular. How are things going?" She opened her bottle and fumbled out a pill, and I watched her hand shake with a tremor, something that had been getting worse for a few months. I wanted her to get checked out, but she insisted she was fine.
"Uh, pretty decent, actually." I wasn't going to tell her we'd just had sex, but I thought that classified as "pretty decent". I sat on the edge of her bed while she took out her other medications and swallowed them with a sip of water, one by one. When she was finished, she set the glass down and patted me on the knee.
"Now see, when she left a few years ago, you were so distraught. But I told you that love finds a way, and if she was The One , she'd be back."
I had told Mom about Lily, almost every detail of it. She knew the depth of mourning I'd gone through when Lily left, and she knew how excited I was when I found her again. We had dinner together a few nights ago when she was in a good spell, and she encouraged me to go for it. I didn't need that encouragement, but having it was special.
"You did say that." I smiled and laid my hand on hers. "How did you know Dad was the one?"
She chuckled, a dry sound that I hoped wasn't going to turn into a coughing fit. "Oh you just know, kiddo. You just know." She patted my hand and closed her eyes. "I was a waitress and he was just another customer, but every time he came in, I'd get butterflies in my stomach. He was so shy with me, always fumbling his change and making small talk, but one day, he asked me out for a soda, and the rest is history."
“And how did you know you were in love?” I asked, and she must have known how I was feeling. I had spent so long in a state of depression and loneliness. With Lily here, life changed.
"When I realized I couldn't picture my life without him in it. I had always been alone and fine, but when I met your father, everything changed. That's how you'll know, when you can't imagine waking up without him by your side." Mom yawned, and I thought about what she said. I already didn’t want to wake up without at least knowing I’d see her at work again. The way she vanished five years ago left me with a bit of PTSD that she’d just up and leave again.
"I'm a bit tired now. Can you let yourself out?"
"Of course." I leaned over and kissed her forehead. "You rest, okay? I'll come by tomorrow with more soup."
"You're a good boy," she mumbled as she lay down. I flipped off the light on her nightstand and walked to the door, pausing to look back. I didn't know how many more talks like that I'd get with her, and I treasured every single one.
As I shut the door quietly behind me and left the room, a smile played on my lips. Love did find a way, just like Mom said. Lily was back in my life, and I wasn't going to let her go again. And I knew, deep down in my bones, that this time, we'd make it work.
With Mom tucked in, I returned to my bedroom hoping to see Lily sleeping peacefully and waiting for me. But the light was on, the bed empty. There was a note scrawled on a sheet of paper on my pillow. I walked over to it and picked it up to read it. My heart simultaneously soared and sank.
Ethan,
I had a great time tonight, but I can't stay here. My own personal responsibilities call and I have to go home. I'm sure you understand.
But I would love to do this again sometime. Give your mom my love.
XOXO
Lily
I smiled at the note knowing my gut was right. Lily wasn't just back in Denver. She was on her way back to me. It made me so happy that I tossed and turned for hours just thinking of the future and how things might develop with her. My heart was full, despite my bed being empty, because I knew it was only a matter of time.
Love finds a way…