CHAPTER 24
C HAPTER 24
R AIDER LOVED IT HERE. It was beautiful. More than that, it felt right somehow.
Seth didn’t seem to feel the same way. He wasn’t easy here. He was on alert. Suspicious.
Eating in the pergola, he’d picked through his food like there would be something in it. There hadn’t been of course.
Everything was fine. This was paradise.
They were walking now along a grassy path that had appeared as they’d left the pergola. As Tarjan had promised, it led back to their room. When the familiar steps appeared, they didn’t go in. They detoured along another path to a reclining couch softened by plump cushions and overhung with sweet-scented jasmine.
Seth sat first, leaning back against the high back. The couch was wide enough for Raider to sit between his legs and lean back against him.
“How can you not like it here?” Raider asked. “Look at it.”
Their spot overlooked a cliff. Nearby, a waterfall tumbled down into a pool beyond their sight.
“You want to stay here?” Seth asked, sounding wary.
“I didn’t say that. But isn’t this what you wanted? A safe place?”
“Do you really think it’s safe?”
“Safer than anywhere else we could be.”
Seth’s chest rose against Raider’s back. He let out a heavy exhalation. “Maybe.”
“Just enjoy the moment, Seth.”
“I enjoy you .”
Raider chuckled. “That’ll work too.”
Raider let himself relax and go quiet. This was everything he wanted. The feel of Seth’s body. The certainty that he would get to enjoy it in all the ways he wanted. Which meant there was no hurry. Right now, he could simply enjoy this.
Raider had one hand resting on Seth’s thigh, right over where the wound had been. Seth’s fingers were tracing idly up and down his arm.
Seth asked softly, “Can I talk to you, baby?”
Raider’s heart skipped. It was something serious or Seth wouldn’t ask like that. And he was asking. If Raider said no, he knew that Seth would respect it and let his questions go, at least for now. But they did need to talk. About a lot of things.
“Yeah, Seth, you can talk to me.”
“It’s a difficult subject.”
“I can tell. What is it?”
“You told me you were on your own at ten.”
Raider’s heart skipped again. Somehow, he hadn’t expected that. “Yeah?”
“Will you tell me what happened? Your life before that.”
“I feel like you have some reason to ask beyond mere curiosity.”
“I do, yes, and we’ll get there, but I need to know if you’re okay with talking about this.”
Raider took a deep breath. “Yeah, I’ll tell you. I, um … it’s a little complicated. I kind of have to start with …” Raider felt his chest tighten.
“Take your time, baby. We can just sit however long you want.”
Raider sighed and relaxed against Seth. He watched the waterfall and listened to the birds. The tightness eased and the words came to him.
“My mother came from a wealthy family. She was young when she got pregnant with me. Unwed. Her father found her a husband, to cover the shame, but it wasn’t cheap. The man who married her did it for the money, of course. And she was very beautiful. I’m sure that didn’t hurt. But he still hated her. In public, he called her his honored wife. In private, he called her a whore.”
Raider fell silent, stuck there.
Seth’s fingers had stilled on Raider’s arm. “And you?”
“He mostly ignored me.”
“Mostly?” When Raider didn’t respond to that, Seth asked in a measured voice, “Did he hurt you?”
Raider shrugged. “Sometimes.”
Seth’s fingers clenched on Raider’s arm and he drew in a harsh breath. Seeming to realize what he was doing, Seth relaxed his grip and soothed the spot.
“And your mother?” Seth asked, still measured.
“He didn’t hurt her, not physically.”
“No—I meant, didn’t she protect you?”
“She had her own troubles. Her own misery. She kept waiting for her lover. My father. But he never came.”
“Who was he?”
“She never said, not to me at least. If she told her husband, I don’t know.”
Seth was silent for a while, but Raider could practically feel him thinking. Then Seth asked, “So how did you end up on the street?”
“He threw me out. He said I was old enough to make it on my own. He was right. I was.”
“For fuck’s sake,” Seth muttered. His arm wrapped around Raider’s torso and held tight.
Raider swallowed a knot in his throat. “Why are you asking?”
Seth took a deep breath and let it out. Like he was readying himself. “Baby … the way your body heals. The way your eye glows sometimes—I mean, you know that it does, right?”
Raider tensed. “I’ve been told that, yeah.”
“Why do you think that is?”
Raider abruptly lost patience. “Why do you think that is, Seth? You obviously have something you want to say—”
“Hey. Easy.” Raider didn’t realize he’d pulled forward until Seth grabbed his shoulder.
Raider twisted to look at Seth. “Just spit it out.”
“This isn’t an accusation. I want to talk to you, but not in that kind of tone. Please. Will you tell me what you know? Because I can tell there’s something.”
Raider untwisted so he didn’t have to look at Seth. “All I know is that something’s wrong with me. Not just the quicksilver. Something deeper. I don’t know what it is, but I can feel it. Something … not right.”
“You say that like you think it’s bad.”
“Well, it doesn’t feel good. It’s like I’m always … out of step. Out of place. For some reason, here in Jannat, I don’t feel it the same. Maybe because there aren’t other people around? Except you, and that’s different. Seth, please, whatever you’re trying to say, just say it.”
“I’m sorry, I’m not trying to make things hard. I just needed to know where you were with this before I imposed my own guess. But it’s more than a guess. Raider … I’m pretty sure your father was djinn.”
That took a moment to trickle in. Then, “ What? ”
“I think that’s why Tarjan started watching you. It began after the scorpions. They’re … well, essentially from what I read, they’re the first guardians of the djinn lands. It was after them that you started seeing Tarjan. And your eye, your real eye, it’s like theirs. And the way you heal—”
Raider got up from the bench and stood looking down at Seth. “You’re saying this like you’re not surprised. Like you knew already.”
Seth sat up. He looked like he was choosing his words carefully. “You know I told you how I talked to Julian? About the quicksilver?”
“What about it?” Raider asked shortly.
“One of the things that came up was something Kahzir wrote. About you. About you not being … human. At least not entirely. That was Kahzir’s speculation as to why you survived what he did to you.”
A shudder went through Raider, his body remembering things that his mind would not allow.
Eyes worried, Seth stood from the couch. Raider turned away and walked to the edge of the overhang, looking down to the frothing white where the waterfall hit the pool. Beside the overhang, a spiral stone staircase led down. Seth came to stand beside him. Raider crossed his arms, not wanting to be touched. Seth seemed to sense that.
Seth asked, “What are you thinking?”
“You already knew about this.”
“Only Kahzir’s speculation, which Julian told me. At the time, I assumed that you knew too and weren’t ready to talk to me about it. But you didn’t know.”
“I only knew there was something off about me. I never let myself look at it too closely.”
“There’s nothing ‘off’ about you, Raider.” When that got no response, Seth said, “Look, I didn’t feel like I could keep this from you, once I realized that you probably didn’t know.”
“And when did you realize that?”
“When I was talking to Tarjan. I could see it in his eyes. The knowledge. And I didn’t see it in yours.”
Raider tightened his crossed arms. He didn’t know how to react to this, didn’t know how to feel.
“Raider—”
“Is this why you got distant with me? After you talked to Julian. I knew something was wrong.”
“Damn it, no. The only thing that was wrong was that I was keeping things from you. And not just this thing but also my plans, as you now know. I felt guilty. That’s what was wrong. And … yeah, okay, I assumed you knew and didn’t trust me enough to tell me. I was trying not to let that bother me, but it did.”
“But that wasn’t even true.”
“I know that now. I made that up in my head. Because I’m paranoid. Because I always feel like you don’t really trust me.”
Raider’s shoulders hitched. “I do trust you, Seth.”
Seth studied him. “There’s a but. I can tell there is. You trust me in most ways … but . But what?”
Fuck, did Raider really want to talk about this? No. Absolutely not. But he needed to.
“You’re not the only one who’s paranoid, Seth. I … look, just let me say this, okay? Don’t get mad or interrupt me, or I won’t be able to finish.”
“Okay. I’m listening.”
“I do expect you to leave me. I know ,” Raider added quickly, “that you’re not going to. As in … I mostly know. But there’s this part of me that knows I’m not worth keeping. It’s one of so many reasons that I never stay anywhere. I always expect to get thrown out. I always expect other people to look at me and suddenly realize that I’m trash.”
Raider sucked in air around the constriction in his throat. He wheezed, “Don’t interrupt me. Just give me a second.”
“I’m right here,” Seth said in a strained whisper.
When Raider felt like he could continue, he said, “I always knew that Hassan would get tired of me eventually. I was a pretty toy for him. He told me that he loved me, which made me think I loved him. But he wasn’t actually that nice to me. He could be really shitty and mean, but I was used to that and didn’t expect anything different. I’m not saying he was a bad person. He wasn’t. I’m just … fuck, I know I’m tangling things.”
“That’s okay.”
“I guess … I just can’t get this part of me that says, Seth is going to realize what you are , to shut the hell up. And I know that’s coming from me, not you, but … fuck, it’s there . In my head. In every fiber of my being. And … shit, give me a second.”
Seth waited quietly. Patiently. There was a settled-in feel to him now. It hadn’t been there before. But he seemed to understand, finally, fully, that none of this was about him.
Raider went on, “And there’s this part of me that thinks …” He drew a shaky breath. “That thinks that what Kahzir did was … not right , I don’t mean that, but more … I guess, why wouldn’t someone do that to me? I mean, why not? I … ah, fuck, I don’t know what I’m saying now. It was so clear at first and now … shit, I don’t know.” He burst out, “I feel worthless. That’s what I’m saying.” Then, “Fuck, I hate talking like this. I don’t always think like this. Mostly I don’t. Not actively. But it’s always there somewhere. In the background.”
Raider felt dizzy. He felt sick. He bent over, bracing his hands on his knees as his stomach churned. He’d never admitted any of this before. Not to another person. Barely to himself.
Raider wished he felt like crying. He wished he could release everything that easily. But he couldn’t. He’d confessed, but everything was still there, as deeply entrenched in him as the quicksilver.
Seth seemed to know not to grab at him. Instead, he reached out and laid his hand on the back of Raider’s head. Seth was silent for a long while then said, “I don’t think I’ve ever had so many people that I want to kill.”
As Raider straightened, Seth’s hand drifted from the back of his head to his nape then around to rest lightly on his throat.
“Is that your way of arguing with me?” Raider asked. Seth shifted to stand directly in front of him. His thumb stroked along Raider’s jaw. Raider tried to meet his eyes but couldn’t.
“I’m not going to going to argue with you, baby. There’s no arguing with feelings. And there are a lot of things that have happened in your life, a lot of people, that have put those feelings in you. I know they won’t be easy to dislodge, but I’m sure as hell going to.”
Raider swallowed hard. “You’re so damn confident.”
“Yes. Because I know how much I love you, even if you don’t quite realize it yet.”
Raider lifted his eyes to Seth’s. In those emerald depths, he saw that love. He knew it was there, that it was real, and a little more of it worked its way into his heart.
Raider asked, “Do you remember when you asked me why I wanted such rough sex with you but only with you?”
“Yeah, baby.”
“And I told you it was because I felt safe with you.”
“I remember.”
“And it is that, but it’s more than that. With you, I can be honest. About what I want and what I need. I trusted you, instinctively, from the beginning. My body trusted you. Words have been harder, because my head gets in the way. But my body knew you from the start. It’s why I need you all the time. When you’re inside me, I’m completely honest. When you’re inside me, I’m completely myself.”
Seth’s eyes shone with tears. “Raider … that is exactly how I feel when I’m with you.”
“I fucking love you, Seth.”
“Goddamn it,” Seth choked out, “I fucking love you too.”
They crushed their lips together. The kiss was so deep, so consuming that Raider lost himself in it—and was glad of it. This was what he needed. The space that Seth made for him to let go.
Seth grabbed at Raider’s hips then his ass, hauling him in. Their cocks brushed through Raider’s silk sarong and the heavier material of Seth’s pants.
Seth grabbed one of Raider’s legs, hauling it high. Raider jumped up, hooking both legs around Seth’s hips, amazed as always by how strong Seth was. No one had ever held him, carried him like Seth could.
Raider felt Seth moving, but he didn’t care where they were going. All he cared about was the friction and pressure of Seth’s body against his. He breathed in the masculine scent of him, felt the heat and tension that promised him everything he needed.
Then Seth was climbing the steps. Raider moaned as his cock rubbed against Seth’s powerful torso. Seth walked to the bed and laid Raider down. Seth kissed him then drew back a little to look at him.
“Gods, you’re beautiful,” Seth breathed, touching Raider’s face. “So fucking beautiful. I can never get enough of you.”
Raider tightened his legs around Seth’s waist. “Don’t be gentle. I need to feel you. Every bit of you. I need it again and again. Fuck me all day.”
Seth closed his eyes and ground his hard cock against Raider’s. “The things I want to do to you …”
“Do them. I don’t want anything to exist but you.”
“But what I want to do—”
“Don’t tell me. I don’t want to think or decide. Just do it. Anything. Everything. I trust you.”
Seth grabbed Raider’s wrists and hauled them up above his head. He pinned them there with one hand. His other hand reached between their bodies. As Seth worked at his belt, his hand pressed into Raider’s balls through the sarong. He groaned and arched.
Seth pulled his belt free and reached up to Raider’s pinned wrists. “You know your safe word,” he said. When Raider nodded, Seth wrapped the belt around his wrists—and bound them to the decorative balustrade at the head of the bed.
Raider’s pulse quickened. Seth kissed his lips, clearly giving Raider a moment to say the word. But Raider had meant what he’d said. He didn’t want to decide anything. He needed Seth to decide. He needed Seth to take him where he had to go.
Seth drew back and stood from the bed. Eyes locked on Raider, Seth unbuckled his vest and shrugged it off. Then he bent to remove his boots and socks.
Raider squirmed, tugging against the belt, frustrated by the lack of contact. “Seth, come on .”
Unlacing his pants, Seth smirked. “I like this.”
“I bet you do.”
Seth’s cock sprang from the opening of his pants. “A lot,” Seth added as he took his huge, swollen length in hand and gave himself a slow stroke.
Raider arched on the bed, desperate for Seth to touch him.
“Oh, baby, you’re beautiful like that.”
“ Seth. ”
Seth pushed down his pants and stepped out of them. Then he went hunting. He opened a cupboard and made of sound of satisfaction. He returned with a bottle and set it beside the bed. Then he crawled onto the mattress and settled between Raider’s legs.
Setting his hands on Raider’s thighs, he slid them up under the sarong. Raider’s cock was tenting it, blocking his view of Seth’s hands as they reached their destination. Raider moaned as Seth’s thumbs rolled across his swollen balls.
Seth massaged around Raider’s groin, driving him wild with stimulation while neglecting his cock. Then Seth rocked back on his heels, leaving Raider panting and frustrated.
Seth, on the other hand, looked very pleased with himself. He reached for the knot of Raider’s sarong and untied it. He dragged the material across Raider’s cock as he freed him. Raider closed his eyes because it was too much to endure—then he shouted as Seth’s mouth closed on his cock. He drove up into Seth’s throat, fucking Seth’s mouth with desperate strokes—until Seth forced him down and drew back. Raider gasped and strained.
“Seth, I need—”
“You’ll get everything you need. Have some damn patience.”
“I do not have patience.”
Seth chuckled. “Isn’t that the truth?” Seth picked up the bottle of oil and poured some into his hand. He slicked his cock, closing his eyes in obvious pleasure.
Raider lifted his legs, intending to hook them around Seth and haul him in, but Seth grabbed and twisted him until he was half on his side, one leg hiked up to expose his ass—and Seth’s oiled fingers speared into him.
Raider cried out at the sudden intrusion then moaned as Seth hit his sweet spot. Raider’s cock jerked up against his belly.
“Do you have any idea how much I think about this perfect hole? Do you have any idea what it feels like? The way it stretches to take me. The way it clenches around me. Fuck, baby, I’m dripping for you. Are you dripping for me?”
Raider moaned, unable to answer with words. When he felt Seth’s fingers against his lips, he opened his mouth and tasted the salty-sweetness of precum.
“That’s what you do to me,” Seth rumbled.
Raider sucked at Seth’s fingers, so turned on he couldn’t think as Seth’s other fingers worked inside his ass.
“That’s it,” Seth praised, “that’s better.”
He took his fingers away from Raider’s mouth but kept his others in Raider’s ass as he reached up to release his bound wrists. The freedom was useless. Raider couldn’t think anymore. He could only feel—and all he felt was Seth.
With those fingers still in his ass, Raider found himself flipped onto his front. His hips were lifted. He gasped as Seth’s fingers vanished—then shouted as Seth’s huge cock took their place. The intrusion was heavy and hard and had him shaking with the mix of pleasure and pain. The penetration went on relentlessly until Seth’s pelvis hit his ass.
“Fuck,” Seth gasped. His hands ran up Raider’s back then down to his hips and thighs. “Fuck, that feels good.”
Raider moaned as Seth took a firm hold on his hips, drew back, then thrust deep. Raider’s cock slapped up against his belly.
Then Seth started to really fuck him. He thrust hard and deep, hitting Raider’s prostate, shattering what remained of his thoughts. Raider gave himself over to the brutal pounding and the erotic sound of Seth’s oiled cock pumping inside him, the feel and sound of Seth’s balls slapping against him. He let himself moan and shout as the pressure built inside him. His balls ached for release. He hadn’t even touched his cock. He couldn’t even think to do it. He just let Seth fuck him.
Seth hauled him up, banding an arm around Raider’s chest. The movement shifted Seth’s cock inside him. Raider screamed at the explosion of his orgasm. He thrashed so hard that Seth bore him back down. Pinning him, Seth fucked him with hard, brutal thrusts that had him screaming into the pillows as his orgasm continued to rip through him.
When he collapsed, gasping and whimpering, Seth stilled. His cock remained rock hard in Raider’s ass.
“Oh fuck,” Raider gasped. “Fuck.” He shifted, overstimulated by the intrusion. Seth’s hands pinned his shoulder blades.
“Fucking hold still. You’re not done. But don’t move or I’ll start fucking you again.”
Raider moaned, overwhelmed.
“That’s it, baby. Be still. You can handle it.”
Seth started to pet him. His hair. His back. His hips. And still that huge cock was inside him—and had him hardening again.
Raider moaned as his cock stiffened, as the heat sparked in his blood, as his balls ached again.
“Yeah,” Seth said in a gravelly tone. “That’s what I thought.”
Raider let out a ragged sound as Seth’s cock dragged back through his channel then punched deep again. Seth pounded his ass, ruthlessly hitting his prostate until Raider was screaming out a second orgasm.
Seth shouted as his hips snapped forward and his cock kicked hard inside Raider, flooding him with cum. “Fuck!” Seth barked as his hips snapped forward again, his cock still kicking hard. “Shit!” His hands clenched brutally on Raider’s hips as he strained. Raider moaned mindlessly as Seth’s hard release milked every drop from him and left him spasming through heavy aftershocks.
He could feel Seth’s aftershocks too as Seth leaned down, resting his forehead between Raider’s shoulder blades.
When Seth withdrew, Raider cried out at the sudden emptiness. Hot semen spilled down his thighs.
“Gods, I love the sight of that,” Seth rasped, his hands kneading Raider’s ass. “Now come here, baby, and let me hold you for a while before I fuck you again.”