27. Hudson
HUDSON
I’ve had these feelings about her for a long time.
Way before everything in Chicago went wrong.
Long before she ever landed here.
I’ve gripped my own cock in the shower more than once, and come with her name on the tip of my tongue.
Back then, she was just a distraction I couldn’t get out of my head.
Her wild red curls and those blue eyes would catch my attention for a second, and then I’d spend the whole night trying not to think about them.
That never really worked.
Now she’s on my lap, kissing me like this isn’t completely fucking insane.
And somehow, walking away feels impossible.
Her soft lips brush against mine again, slow and careful. I feel tension building in my chest.
This is a really bad idea.
For a thousand reasons, I should stop.
But I don’t.
My hands settle on her hips, holding her exactly where she is.
What the fuck are we going to do?
Her question from earlier keeps echoing in my mind, and I still don’t have an answer.
I have to go back to the team in more than a week.
Even with this entire situation ready to explode in our faces, part of me still wants to get back to hockey.
I’ve been playing well again and enjoying the game.
Everything else is a serious clusterfuck.
Lucian is still stuck in that house, acting like he doesn’t know a thing.
Martin is probably watching his every move by now. He’s probably even more volatile since he doesn’t know where I am.
If I go back, he’ll try to make an example out of me.
Normally, I wouldn’t care what’d happen to me.
But it stopped being just about me the moment Eva and Lucian got pulled into this.
Damn it.
The thought of either of them suffering for my mistakes makes guilt twist inside me.
Meanwhile, Eva is soft and warm, and it’s impossible not to notice how tempting she is.
She runs her hand through my hair, her fingers curling at the back of my neck, and I tense up all over.
“Hudson.”
My name sounds way too intimate when she says it.
“You shouldn’t be doing this,” I say to her.
My voice is rough.
“Probably not, but I want to,” she says.
I should get up and walk away before I do something I’ll regret.
Instead, I slide my hands up her back, feeling her smooth skin. She sighs against my mouth. I swear I could lose control just from that.
My cock is already hard between her thighs, every shift of her hips making it worse.
Each time she kisses me, I feel my self-control start to fade.
I know I should slow down.
But I don’t.
I gently help her lie back on the couch.
Her red curls spread across the dark cushions, framing her flushed cheeks and hooded eyes.
I can’t help but notice the freckles that dust the bridge of her nose and cheeks.
“You’re fucking beautiful,” I whisper as I run my thumb along her cheek.
Then I slowly undress her.
I’ve seen her naked before, but it’s never felt this way.
She’s never been this open, this trusting.
Never this flushed with wanting.
She’s never looked at me like she wants me just as much as I want her.
I press my forehead to hers for a moment, trying to steady myself.
“Tell me if you want me to stop.”
“Keep going.”
That’s all I need to hear.
I kiss her deeply, and she melts into me, letting out a soft sound that nearly wrecks me.
“Can I taste you?” I ask softly.
I want this to be her choice.
I need to know she wants me too.
Eva looks into my eyes for a long moment, then nods.
Then she spreads her legs, already wet for me, and my control slips another inch.
I lose myself in the taste of her.
The broken little sounds she makes nearly undo me.
“Let me touch you,” she rasps, moving her hands to my waistband. My hard cock bobs as I pull down my boxers. She grips it, stroking me as I pant, biting back the urge to come just from her touch.
“It’s been a while,” I admit, gritting my teeth.
A sexy as hell smile tugs at her mouth. “You’re overdue.”
But I pull back before I lose control completely.
I’m not ready for this to end yet.
I want to make her come.
I stand and help her to her feet. Pulling her close, I run a finger from her clit to her ass. She moans, sagging against me as I slip two fingers inside.
I don’t want to stop touching her.
The second I let myself have her, something possessive unfurls inside me. I want more of her than I should, more than I have any right to want.
I pull back just enough to look at her. She makes a soft sound of protest low in her throat that nearly undoes me.
“Don’t,” she whispers.
I kiss her firmly before she has a chance to say another word.
She lets out a small, surprised breath and instinctively curls into me as I lift her and carry her down the short hallway to the bedroom.
The lamp by the bed fills the room with a warm amber light. Outside, rain taps gently on the large windows that look out over the lake. The sound is soft and steady in the background.
I lower her onto the mattress slowly, keeping one hand under her back so her weight doesn’t press on the healing cuts on her stomach.
Still, she winces a little.
My stomach tightens right away.
“Too much?”
“No,” she whispers quickly. “Don't stop.”
Her hair falls messily around her shoulders, and her cheeks are flushed.
Bruises and healing cuts still show on her skin.
I force myself to move carefully.
She trusts me—the thought hits me harder than I expect.
I kneel between her legs again, hands sliding slowly up her calves and thighs, giving her time to stop me if she wants.
She never does.
“You’re staring,” she murmurs, trembling.
“I'm aware.”
I still don’t look away.
Her silken fold is glistening with heat that drives me fucking insane.
I kiss the inside of one knee first, then the other. My mouth trails upward slowly.
Her fingers slide into my hair when I kiss the underside of her breast. The shaky breath that leaves her mouth makes my cock ache.
“Hudson,” she whispers.
My name sounds wrecked and wanted coming from her.
I drag my mouth across one hardened nipple and feel her whole body arch slightly beneath me.
“You have no idea what you do to me,” I mutter against her skin.
She lets out a weak laugh that dissolves into a moan when I suck gently at her breast again.
The sound nearly wrecks me.
Carefully, I press kisses along the places that aren't bruised.
Her thighs spread wider for me without hesitation.
That nearly destroys the little restraint I have left.
My hands tighten slightly against her skin. I look up at her once before leaning in.
The first taste of her makes my head go light.
Her breath catches sharply when my tongue slides inside. I groan quietly against her.
Fuck, I don’t think I could ever get enough of this.
I lick and suck at that sweet space between her legs. My thumb vibrates against her clit, my tongue slipping deep inside her slick pussy.
One of her hands fists the sheets while the other grips my hair harder, pulling me closer.
I pull her tighter against my mouth.
Her back arches instantly.
The movement pulls at her abdomen hard enough for her to suck in a sharp breath.
I immediately flatten a hand gently against her hip.
“Easy,” I murmur against her. “Let me take care of you.”
She’s already trembling.
Every reaction pulls me deeper.
Her moans. Her thighs twitch around my shoulders.
My name breaks apart on her tongue like a prayer.
Suddenly, she’s writhing beneath me, moaning, hips rocking helplessly against my mouth.
“Hudson—”
Her voice breaks.
I feel her tighten around my fingers before the shudder tears through her as she comes.
I glance up just long enough to watch her.
Her head tips back, red hair tangled across the pillows, mouth parted, so fucking beautiful it almost hurts to look at.
I keep going, slower now, drawing it out until she’s squirming, laughing weakly, and trying to push at my shoulder.
“So good,” she gasps.
I taste every drop of her release until she stills. Her breathing is heavy, her eyes unfocused.
I finally pull back, breathing hard myself.
“I want you inside me,” she says, reaching for my cock, which is now wet with precum.
The words hit me hard enough they nearly break my composure.
My gaze drops instinctively to the fading bruises on her stomach.
Wanting her isn’t the problem.
The problem is that I want her too much.
Her hand slides between us, wrapping around my cock and stroking me once, twice.
And I almost cave.
I grab her wrist gently before she guides me any farther.
“I want that too,” I say honestly. “Too fucking much.”
“Then why are you stopping?”
“Because I know exactly what happens if I lose control now.”
I’m already too close.
I rest my forehead against hers.
“Your body’s still healing,” I murmur. “I won’t hurt you.”
Her eyes search mine.
I swallow hard.
“I won’t,” I repeat more firmly. “Ever.”
Something in her expression softens.
Tears spill down her cheeks suddenly, and panic flashes through me instantly. I move up to kiss them away.
“Hey,” I whisper. “Don’t do that.”
She laughs shakily through the tears.
“You’re very confusing.”
“Yeah,” I mutter. “I know.”
Her hand finds me again.
“Eva,” I warn.
She fists me, her hand moving up and down my shaft as our foreheads meet. Tension coils hard in my gut until it aches.
My hips start moving against her hand before I can stop myself, and she watches all of it with flushed cheeks, swollen lips, and those dark blue eyes fixed completely on me.
The orgasm tears through me hard enough to make my arms shake.
For a long moment, neither of us moves.
The room stays quiet except for our breathing and the rain against the windows.
I finally pull back enough to really look at her.
Flushed, sleepy, and thoroughly undone beneath me.
Her body still bears evidence of everything she’s survived, but none of it diminishes her.
If anything, it makes her look stronger. Untouchable in a completely different way.
I head to the bathroom before I say something stupid.
When I come back with a warm cloth, she’s already half asleep.
“You don’t have to?—”
“I know.”
I clean her with quiet care.
She shivers a little when I wipe away the mess on her skin, and I press a kiss to her knee afterward without thinking.
“You okay?”
She gives me a sleepy nod.
“Yeah.”
I toss the cloth aside and climb into bed beside her, pulling her carefully against my chest.
She melts into me immediately like she’s always belonged there.
The thought arrives instantly.
Mine.
I shut it down just as fast.
Outside, rain continues falling softly over the lake.
Inside, her breathing slows little by little until she’s asleep in my arms.
And holding her there in the dark, skin against skin, with her warmth wrapped around me, makes me realize I’ve never felt anything remotely like this in my entire life.