Chapter 33
Emma
As Emma approached her quaint cottage, a wave of unfamiliarity washed over her. It was unlike her to return so early, and even her beloved companion Riley seemed taken aback by her sudden appearance. The dog lay asleep in his bed, only stirring awake when Emma shut the door behind her. With a wag of his tail, Riley bounded over to greet her, offering the type of comfort that only an animal could provide.
Emma set her keys and purse down on the living room table before making her way to her bedroom. The clothes she had worn that day, a pencil skirt and blouse, now seemed suffocating and restrictive. She needed to escape their constraints and the painful memories they held. Quickly changing into a comfortable, oversized t-shirt and sweatpants, she gathered her long hair into a messy bun, desperate to erase any traces of the hurtful words Jeremiah had spoken to her earlier.
Emma sunk to the floor, leaning against her bed, and closed her eyes. Riley sensed her distress and sat by her side, placing his paws on her lap, and licked her face. She reached up with both hands and rubbed behind his ears as she leaned her head on him.
“Thanks, boy. I love you too.”
This wasn’t the first time Riley had been there for her. Many times, Chad had left her in tears, especially on their anniversary when he served her with divorce papers. Riley was a constant for Emma and had a charming way about him that always brought her reassurance.
Her mind raced as her thoughts tumbled over one another, unable to slow them down. Emma’s deepest fear had been confirmed: Jeremiah had discovered the truth about her and Luke and he was far from accepting it. The future she had envisioned with Luke crumbled, leaving her heart aching with the weight of reality. As if that weren’t enough, she knew it would only be a matter of time before the entire town was aware of the events that transpired in her classroom today.
Knock. Knock. Knock.
Riley barked and sprinted to the door. Emma stood up and followed behind him. Who could be knocking? Who even knew she was home? She didn’t want to talk to anyone.
Knock. Knock. Knock.
Emma stepped over to one of the front windows and pulled back the curtain only enough to peek outside. It was Luke. Of course, it was Luke. He’d probably already gone up to the school and heard about everything that had happened.
Knock. Knock. Knock.
“Emma, I know you’re in there,”
he said through the door. “Can you please let me in so we can talk about this?”
Emma walked back over to the couch and sat down, curling her feet up under her. Although it broke her heart to leave him standing there on the porch, she couldn’t face him right now.
She continued to ignore his knocks and Luke eventually got back in his car and drove away. She just needed time, she told herself. And she needed ice cream.
Emma walked into the kitchen and grabbed the entire carton and a spoon. She took it back out to the living room, sat down, and turned on the TV. She’d been so busy with her dog treat business and going out with Luke, her Netflix queue of shows to watch had been sorely neglected. Turning on a housewives reality show, she peeled off the top of the ice cream. It was time to take it easy.
She stayed on the couch all afternoon watching episode after episode of rich women in pretty dresses yelling at each other. As the evening rolled around, she had already binged two full seasons. Emma didn’t care much for the show, but at least it took her mind off things. The entire time, Riley stuck close to her side, knowing something wasn’t right with her.
The next morning, Emma woke up with a stomachache from eating too much ice cream and mentally wasn’t ready to go back to work. She wasn’t ready to face everyone yet, especially if they all thought what Jeremiah had said was true. And she didn’t want to break down in front of her students again, which she knew would happen one hundred percent. It might be better for her to stay put for another day and let it blow over.
After she got out of bed and made Riley’s breakfast, she sat down at her kitchen table and watched him eat. Her phone was left on the table and she was almost scared to open it. She had put it on silent when she got home yesterday and hadn’t checked it since. But if she wanted to take the day off, she would have to call Principal Kennedy.
Grabbing the phone, she ignored the texts, missed call notifications, and went straight for the stored number for Hadley Cove High. She’d never called out from a job a single day in her life, and she was nervous to do so now.
“Hey, can I speak to Principal Kennedy please? It’s Emma Wright speaking.”
“Oh of course, Ms. Wright, you poor thing. I’ll patch you through,”
the secretary said in a pitying tone.
Emma took a deep breath, trying to focus on how she was going to phrase her words.
“Emma, hello,”
Principal Kennedy answered. “How are you doing?”
“I’ve been better,”
she said. “That’s why I was calling you. I don’t think I’m ready to come back yet.”
“I understand. Why don’t you take a couple more days to yourself and I’ll check in at the end of the week. How does that sound?”
She smiled, grateful for his understanding. “That would be wonderful, Mr. Kennedy. I’m sure I’ll be back to normal by next week.”
“Wonderful. And if you would just email me your lesson plans for this week, I’ll see that the sub gets them.”
“I’ll do that right now, Mr. Kennedy. Thank you so much.”
“You’re welcome, Emma. Get some rest and don’t worry. Everyone will forget what happened in a few days.”
Emma let out a sigh. “I hope so.”
As she hung up, a weight lifted off her shoulders. It was a relief knowing she wouldn’t have to plaster on a brave face and go on as if everything were okay. Over the next few days, Emma stayed cooped up with Riley, only leaving to take him out for walks and exercise. She kept getting texts from Lisa, Kara, and Luke, but she ignored them all.
Lisa: Emma? Are you okay??? I can bring over some dinner later if you want...
Kara: Let me know if you need anything. I can be at your place in an instant.
Luke: Emma, please talk to me. I’m worried about you.
She wasn’t in the mood to talk. Riley was the only company she wanted to keep for now. Perhaps at the end of the week she’d feel different, but for the time being she was content with her hermit status.
Emma felt terrible for not answering Luke, but she wasn’t ready to do what she knew had to be done. She couldn’t come between Luke and his son’s relationship, even if she was the happiest she’d ever been with anyone.
As Emma’s thoughts wandered, she thought that maybe fate had other plans for her. When Chad came along, she was certain she would spend the rest of her life with him. But somewhere along the way, it changed. By the time they ended, he had made her feel worthless. Now, a small voice in the back of her mind whispered that Chad had been right all along: no one else would ever truly love her. It would have only been a matter of time before Luke realized he had made a mistake and left her, like Chad had done. She couldn’t bear the thought of being hurt again, and so she made the difficult decision to push Luke away. It was better to end things now, before she was left heartbroken once more.
A tear trickled down her cheek as she thought about ending things with Luke. Although they’d only been together a short while, it felt like they’d shared a thousand moments that she’d hold on to forever. Emma had fallen deeply in love with him, but now she to fall out of it.
How do even do that—fall out of love?
To ask one’s heart to deny the very thing that has awakened their soul is a task that borders the impossible. It’s like asking the sun not to rise, or the tides not to ebb and flow. Love is a force of nature that cannot be contained or controlled. It’s the spark that ignites a fire within us, and once lit, it is not easily extinguished. To deny the pull of our heartstrings is to deny our very nature, and to do so is a feat that few have been able to accomplish.
As she slipped on her bathrobe, Emma walked over to the couch and flipped on season three of a reality show to distract herself from her thoughts. But it was no use. Tears streamed down her face, soaking the throw pillow beneath her head. Riley jumped up and licked away her tears, then nuzzled his head against her chest. Emma wrapped her arms around him, seeking solace in his affection as she postponed the inevitable. She knew that she would have to end things with Luke, maybe not today, but soon.
As if on cue, her innermost insecurities began to echo louder, whispering that she was not worthy of the love and happiness she so deeply desired. The thought of losing Luke, the man who had made her believe in love once more, stirred an unfathomable sadness within her, leaving her with a loneliness that seemed determined to be her lifelong companion.