Chapter 3
Ellis worked to maintain her composure as she stood in front of Keele. It was difficult. She wanted to flee.
He didn’t seem angry exactly, but he also didn’t appear pleased. And why would he be? She’d completely misrepresented herself.
Compounding her humiliation was the fact that she’d actually thought she’d been successful in her endeavors. With each day that passed since she’d taken the position, she believed she could maintain her disguise and conceal her true identity, that she’d fooled her employer and everyone else.
But she had not. She would have to come up with another way to earn money. She didn’t think she could attempt this sort of arrangement again, nor did she want to. It had been a huge risk, and she’d failed.
“How did you know?” she asked softly, abandoning the effort to lower her voice.
“Something about you just wasn’t quite right,” Keele replied, uncrossing his arms. His features were enigmatic.
She still couldn’t tell precisely how he felt.
“You have feminine mannerisms, and there’s your feminine handwriting.
And you like books with a feminine bent.
In addition to having read The Captain’s Daughter, I noted you took novels from the library this week that are of the same romantic nature.
” He gestured toward the cases where such books were kept.
“I believed you when you said these things were due to having four sisters, but—and this isn’t something a gentleman should say—when you bent to retrieve your notebook a short while ago, it became blatantly obvious that you are, in fact, a female. ”
Heat flamed Ellis’s cheeks. Could he see her embarrassment behind her beard? She hoped not.
“I didn’t think of that,” she said, wondering how she could have disguised her backside, if that was indeed to what he was referring. She narrowed her eyes at him as she sought to confirm what he meant. “Are you saying my posterior is too feminine?”
“I don’t know that it can be too feminine,” he replied.
“But it is not the backside of a young man. That much I know for certain.” His gaze found hers for a brief but rather heated moment, then he quickly looked away.
“We should not continue discussing that. I didn’t mean to cause offense, but I had to call you out. You understand?”
Ellis exhaled. Her shoulders drooped slightly, but she worked to straighten her spine. “I knew this was a terrible risk, and I probably shouldn’t have taken it. However, I am in need of employment, and I knew I could do this job.”
“In fact, you can,” he said. “You do it incredibly well.”
“Thank you.” Pride helped to lift her shoulders and her spirits.
He surveyed her as if she were a puzzle he needed to work out. “I’m confounded as to why you would take such a risk. Why disguise yourself as a man to be secretary to a marquess?”
“Because I possess the skills to do the job, and being a woman with those skills would not allow me to obtain such a position and, more importantly, the salary that comes with it.”
“You’ve a valid point.” He went quiet for a moment, and Ellis’s insides churned. Whilst he didn’t seem angry, she wasn’t sure what to expect. “Was the letter from the Duke of Henlow real? The seal on the envelope appeared to be his.”
“Yes,” she replied evenly, though her heart was pounding. “My family is acquainted with his.”
“Did you actually work for him?” Keele asked with more than a hint of skepticism.
“His Grace offered to write me a letter of recommendation. It is not my place to quarrel with what he wrote.” Ellis was skirting the truth and might earn the marquess’s ire, but she wasn’t going to admit that she hadn’t worked for Henlow. Keele could deduce what he liked.
He regarded her somewhat dubiously, and Ellis became certain that was the end of things. As it should be. How could he trust her to work for him now?
She took a deep breath to try to calm her racing pulse. “I’m sorry I lied to you. I will pack my things and be on my way.” She took a step toward the door, but he held his hand up in front of her.
“I didn’t ask you to go. Just because you’re a woman doesn’t mean you can’t work for me.”
Ellis stared at him. “That would be highly irregular and unacceptable. Furthermore, I lied to you. I wouldn’t blame you for not being able to trust me in your employ.”
Keele cocked his head and lifted a shoulder. “It would be irregular, and whilst many would not find it acceptable, it is acceptable to me. What is your real name?”
Ellis’ breath snagged in her lungs. It was one thing for him to know she was a woman, but if he learned she was also the former companion to Lady Minerva Halifax—rather, Lady Minerva Pierce now—she would be completely exposed.
He would certainly tell his friend, Sheff, and Sheff would tell Min.
Ellis was trying to forge a new path away from her past. She didn’t want to see any of them yet.
She also didn’t want to chance the duchess discovering where she was or what she was doing.
There was every reason to believe she would do her best to ruin things for Ellis, as she’d done since she’d been forced to accept Ellis into her household.
“Would you mind if I didn’t say?” she asked. “I’m no one important.”
“I should at least like to know what to call you,” he said.
“Ellis is fine. It’s an old family name.” That much was true. Well, it was an adopted family name, anyway.
She studied him a moment, surprised at how easily he accepted her gender and that he wanted her to remain in the position. “You really want me to stay on? I’d prefer to continue my disguise.”
He nodded. “I won’t tell anyone. Though, I imagine it’s difficult keeping yourself in disguise all the time.” He grimaced. “I’m surprised you agreed to live here. You can’t ever be who you really are.”
Ellis smiled and saw the flicker of surprise in his gaze. “It’s actually wonderful. Just now, it’s quite nice to be someone else.”
His brows drew together as he contemplated her with sympathy. “You’re in hiding, then.”
That was precisely what she was doing. “I suppose I am.”
“Perhaps that’s why you don’t want me to know your real name.
” Keele exhaled. “Very well. You may hide here for as long as you need, provided you continue to excel at your job. My retainers would keep your secret, but I agree it’s probably best if you just maintain your disguise.
And I won’t tell the Laceys, of course. Is that why you looked distressed when you were invited to the meeting tomorrow?
You didn’t want to leave the house and risk being seen for who you really are? ”
“You noticed that bothered me?” Ellis shook her head.
“You are far too astute, my lord. I believe it is best for my disguise if I encounter as few people as possible. I actually welcomed your offer to live here. Not only does it save me money, it’s simpler not to have to go back and forth between dressing as a man and a woman. ”
“I’m glad to have helped inadvertently,” he said with one of his rare smiles.
Ellis found herself staring at him, thinking he was remarkably handsome in a dark and predatory way.
It was his nose and the rough planes of his face.
His features were strong and commanding, and his eyes were an impenetrable steel.
“So you’ll continue as my secretary?” he asked.
She noted that he hadn’t addressed her lying to him. “You don’t care that I misrepresented myself?”
“Without knowing the details that are motivating you to hide, I still accept that you were trying to find the best possible position for yourself and that you were induced to present yourself as a man to achieve that end. I actually admire your courage. Have you lied about anything else?”
She shook her head. “Nor will I.”
“Good. I am more than satisfied with your work, and I would like you to continue,” he replied firmly. “I will do what I can to help keep your secret, because I have a vested interest.”
“Thank you.” At last, her pulse began to move at a normal pace. “I won’t disappoint you.”
“How are you bathing?” he blurted.
Warmth flooded her face once more. Why had he thought of that? “I haven’t yet taken a proper bath,” she admitted. “I know of the bathing chamber on the lower ground floor, off the servants’ hall. I thought I would use that.”
He cocked his head. “How will that work? You’ll go downstairs in your disguise, remove the hair from your face to wash, then replace it to go upstairs? I can’t imagine you sleep with the fake beard. That sounds very inefficient. And how will you wash your hair? I assume you’re wearing a wig.”
She was surprised at how thoroughly he’d thought about her disguise and the problems she would encounter here.
“I am. I thought about cutting my hair, but if this didn’t work out and I had to be a woman again, I decided that would be bad.
I’ve been pondering how I will wash my hair,” she admitted. “I’m sure I’ll think of something.”
“No need,” Keele said, lifting his hand. “You shall use my bath chamber. I’ll arrange it with Alvin. Are you already fetching your own water to wash?”
“I am,” she replied.
He shook his head. “That won’t do.”
Ellis was surprised at his strong reaction. “Why? Because I’m a woman?”
He stopped and stared at her, his features blank. “Yes.” His brow creased as if he realized how absurd that sounded.
“I’m already doing a man’s job,” she reminded him.
“And better than most men,” he muttered. “Your point is well taken. You may continue to fetch your own water. However, filling a tub is too much. I will instruct Alvin to prepare a bath for you.”
Ellis could imagine the young footman, as well as the rest of the retainers, wondering why the secretary was permitted to bathe in the lord’s bath chamber. “Don’t you think your household will find this arrangement strange?”