Chapter 11
Siya stood at the sink and slid the ice-cold mask from her face. Discarding it, she began washing away the remnants of leftover fruit pulp from her face. As she patted her face dry with a folded towel, she noticed that the puffiness and redness tinting her cheeks were slowly fading.
She could hear voices buzzing with activity beyond her room. Laughter echoed loudly, then softened under a careful shush. Someone called out for the placement list. She could hear it all, just not the voice she truly missed. His voice.
Her pulse flickered with the memory of last night.
She’d expected lethargy, fatigue or dire exhaustion, all of which she usually dealt with after an anxiety surge, but oddly enough, all she felt was an echo of how safe she’d felt with Abhay.
For the first time in years, she had shared the weight she carried with someone and not braced for rejection.
Siya remembered the low cadence of his voice when he had told her to breathe with him, and the quiet authority in the way he spoke her name gave her a dark thrill. Her palm tingled with the memory of how steady his heartbeat had felt against it.
The scent of his cologne crashed back into her, and she remembered how his thumb had trailed on her collarbone. Her breathing grew heavy, and a flare of heat pooled in her lower belly. She knew just how dangerously easy it was to give in to the dark promises his gaze held.
Enough, she scolded herself. The kind of mistake he made does not just vanish because he smells heavenly, she reminded the face staring back at her. Red veins still circled the whites of her eyes, but she hated seeing a shadow of hope reflected in them.
So, she grabbed onto the anger and betrayal that haunted her and used it to fill in the cracks in her armour he’d made in just one night.
While it did not erase the memory of his thrilling touch as he’d pinned her wrists, or the way his muscular body had held her all night, it served as a temporary shield against his charms.
She quickly checked her phone and saw Kashvi still hadn’t replied to her text. That worried her.
When she opened the bathroom door, she found Meera sitting on the bed, one leg tucked under another. She was stirring coffee in the mug she held, and her smile brightened up the room. Relief moved through Siya so quickly that her knees nearly buckled.
‘What are you doing here?’ she asked as she crossed the rug, the plush pile tickling her toes, and took a seat beside Meera.
‘Where else would I be? It’s not every day that my best friend throws an engagement brunch. Besides, someone had to make sure that if the bride wants to run away, she has help,’ Meera said, and lightly bumped her shoulder against hers.
‘Am I that obvious?’ Siya asked, taking the cup of coffee Meera passed on to her. She inhaled deeply and the hot vapour warmed her cold face.
‘What can I say? It’s the way you look at people like you’re planning for a war that makes them move out of your way. You could try smiling. Maybe it’ll help,’ Meera said, taking a small sip.
Siya let out a soft sigh and blew on the steam. ‘That’s impossible. I was born with this face.’
They shared a short, merry laugh and the rigid tension slowly melted from her body. She could breathe easier just by being in Meera’s company.
‘How are you?’ Meera asked after a beat.
Siya hesitated, then lifted one shoulder in a small shrug. She had an upcoming day full of practiced lies and scripts to follow, but she’d be damned if that day began by her lying to her childhood friend.
Before Meera could ask further, Siya decided to deflect from the topic. She traced a thumb along the rim of the mug as she casually asked, ‘Have you spoken to Kashu?’
Meera gave her an exasperated look, like she’d caught onto her trick. But Siya took a deep breath when she let it go.
She patted the cream garment bags perched beside her and said, ‘Your assistant dropped off this brunch dress at your apartment last night. She didn’t know you’d moved in here. I stayed over with Kashu last night, so I thought I’ll bring these along.’
The dresses were glinting with colour and stones but her focus was stuck on what Meera had mentioned. A rush of emotions stung her eyes as Siya rasped, ‘You stayed with her last night?’
‘Of course I did,’ Meera stated as a matter of fact.
She slipped her arm and looped it with hers.
‘She’s my baby sister too. I knew the first night would be the toughest so from here, I went straight to your place.
I wasn’t about to leave her alone with nothing but stale takeout dinner and her chaotic thoughts. ’
‘I didn’t even think of asking someone to stay with her. I just…’ Siya trailed off, feeling the familiar bite of guilt.
‘No, don’t do that. You can’t always be the one who stays strong. It’s okay to fall apart sometimes. You were surviving your own storm so it’s allowed that you missed a few things.’
She sniffled and rested her head on Meera’s shoulder. Thank god she had her friends who could step in. A flash of Abhay’s penetrating, whiskey eyes burst into her mind, and she quickly stomped it shut.
She leaned back enough to look at Meera and asked, ‘I hated leaving her like that. Is Kashu okay?’
Meera made a snorting sound. ‘She was too quiet for my liking, so I bullied her into eating parathe and curd with me. You know how she hates that. But she did take her revenge by forcing me to watch the worst horror movie ever made, so don’t feel too sorry for her.’
Siya laughed under her breath. It seemed like her baby sister was living up to her reputation of being a difficult child, and for that, she was proud of her. ‘She’s lucky you were there to put up with her.’
‘I put up with both of you,’ Meera sighed, wiping off non-existent sweat from her forehead. ‘Isn’t that why you gifted me the “mom of the group” coffee mug for my birthday last year?’
‘Hey! That was Swayam’s idea. He is the one liable for the damages caused, not me.’
‘Okay, miss lawyer. We have a deal that you’ll represent me when I sue him. Anyway,’ Meera said and pulled out a velvet box from her purse. ‘Kashvi sent these. She has also sent a message, asking you to wear these. She plans to give a taste of rebellion to your father.’
Siya opened the box and found the pearl drop sapphire earrings that once belonged to their late mother.
A tear-shaped sapphire was hung below a big pearly strand and the pair had been among her mother’s favourites.
She’d always made sure to wear these at every milestone celebration.
Kashvi had inherited them when she turned eighteen.
In all the chaos, Siya had prioritised focusing on only the matter at hand, but looking at the earrings brought forward an aching loss she tried to live with. Her mother had been a ray of sunshine in her life, and despite being forced into getting married, Siya wished her mother could be here.
Siya accepted it with her heart full of love. The garment bag caught her attention and she fidgeted with its zipper. ‘Did you see the dress Dad’s stylist chose? How is it?’
A mischievous glint sparkled in her eyes as Meera tugged her by the hand and pulled her into the closet. She hung the dress on a rack and said, ‘This isn’t what she chose but before I tell you the full story, you’ve got to see the dress. I’ve waited all night to show you.’
She furrowed her brows, confused by Meera’s excitement but as soon as she pulled down the zipper, Siya understood. Her breath caught in her throat, eyes fixated on the beauty in front of her.
The sundress was the icy blue colour of the winter sky.
The satin soft fabric had a sheen woven into the threads, making it sparkle under the sunrays seeping in through the glass skylight.
Thin straps of crystal beads framed the neckline and the bodice was form-fitting, flowing down to her knees in shimmery waves.
It looked straight out of a fairytale, modified for the comfort of a modern woman.
She reached out and let her fingers slide along the satin, and it was so silky that it felt as if she were playing with water.
She assumed Meera had chosen it for her and said, ‘Mihu, this dress… I’m speechless. You’ve picked a damn winner. If I had to face the cameras, the scrutiny of the public, and glares from my family, this is the dress I could do it in.’
Meera shook her head and said, ‘It wasn’t me.’
Siya blinked. ‘Then who? Kashu picked it?’
Meera slowly shook her head again, a small smile playing at her lips.
Siya looked at the dress, really looked at the dress. The colour of the fabric tugged at a faint memory in her mind. The realisation sank in slowly.
Four years ago, on that ballroom balcony where she met Abhay, she’d worn a saree of this exact shade. She could still remember his warm lips moving against hers as he had her pinned to the wall.
A lump of desire formed in her throat so suddenly she practically choked on it. She tried to exhale through it as she lowered herself on the velvet cushion. Had he picked this exact colour to remind her of that night?
She breathed. ‘Why did he…? When did he even…?’
Meera admitted. ‘We were having dinner late last night when Abhay came by your apartment to check up on Kashvi. He made sure she was okay, insisted on checking the door and window locks, and then offered to bring her back here right away. He said he’d put together a new room for her without needing to move her stuff and no one would know she was staying here. ’
Siya gasped lightly, clutching the robe at her chest. ‘I can’t believe he did that.’
Meera nodded with a soft smile. ‘But Kashu refused. She said that the apartment is home for both of you, and at least one of you should be living there. Abhay played the “I’m the elder one so I know better” card that you use on her and insisted that she come with him right away.’
A reluctant smile curved up her lips. She raised a brow and asked, ‘How did that work out for him?’
‘As well as it works out for you,’ Meera giggled. ‘He got a lecture for five minutes on how that concept is one of the core problems of our society. By the end of it, he had held up his hands in surrender. It was very fun to watch.’
‘I bet,’ Siya said, and all of a sudden a sliver of energy raked around her heart. She would see her sister soon, and she couldn’t wait to get a firsthand account of how she had handled Abhay.
‘She rolled her eyes when he tried to tell her she could call him anytime. She tried to act casual but I could tell it mattered to her that he cared.’
After putting her to bed, Abhay had gone over to make sure if her sister was okay? Siya tried not to let it affect her, but whether she liked it or not, the knowledge sank into her like a pebble. ‘How did he even see this dress?’
‘When he turned to leave, he noticed the dresses hanging on the back of the door. He looked at them for a moment, then told me he’d love it if you wore the blue colour.’
Her eyes drifted back to the dress. She reached out to touch it again as if the dress were tugging her closer. The icy blue glittered like a waterfall under the light, and the colour now felt too familiar for comfort.
‘I hate that he did this,’ Siya whispered and pulled her hand back.
Armed with decades of their crazy friendship, Meera could understand her silence just as well as her words. ‘Do you hate it or you think you should hate it?’ she probed.
Siya shrugged in response, unwilling to voice the truth. ‘He seems to be handling all of this well.’
Meera paused while hanging the rest of the dresses and said, ‘Maybe on the surface. But his eyes… they don’t match his smile.’
She wanted to dismiss it, but the thought lodged itself deep into her mind. The thought of him being in pain pricked her heart like countless needles, but so did the memory of when she’d found out she was falling for the man who broke her trust.
‘Or maybe he’s just good at pretending,’ she murmured to herself.
‘Maybe,’ Meera echoed, but she didn’t sound convinced.
But Siya knew just how excellent he was at pretending and she had no intention of forgetting that betrayal simply because his arms felt like home.
Her instinct screamed at her to rebuild the walls.
If she didn’t stop herself, she might begin to believe there is something real between them worth holding on to.
The corner of her mouth lifted in a sharper smile as she made up her mind. ‘I know exactly what to do.’
Meera tilted her head, studying her closer. ‘Should I be worried, girl?’
‘Only if you like peace and quiet,’ Siya replied, and rose from her seat.
Meera laughed and shook her head. ‘That ship sailed the day Raghav introduced us to those idiots. Now I know better than to expect peace. Get ready. I’ll pick out some other dress for you.’
‘What’s the hurry?’
‘I left Abhay downstairs with a clipboard he does not technically own, overseeing every little detail. I think he scared the caterer into rearranging the fruit platters. Let’s try to show up on time for his sanity,’ Meera chuckled.
She gave Siya’s shoulder a light squeeze and walked out of the room. Once alone, the dress pulled Siya’s attention back to it, and the feminine urge to wear it and glide down the stairs overwhelmed her. But she held on to her decision.
If she chose to wear this blue someday, it would be on her own terms.