Chapter 19 Cole
COLE
“Fuck, I did it. I hit submit!” I say excitedly to Bash, who presses the submit button at the same time.
“Oh my god, I can’t believe we actually did it. We applied to nursing school!” Bash lifts his hand into the air, which I eagerly high-five.
A few days ago, Bash and I were discussing our plans for the future while waiting to go onstage at Peaches.
We got onto the subject of nursing and realized it was something that we were both interested in.
After looking at the closest university’s website, we saw that there were applications due soon.
Deciding it was fate and something we could do together, we made plans to meet up and send in our submissions together.
It’s exciting and nerve-wracking at the same moment.
I don’t even know if I’ll get in, but it’s thrilling to think about what I want to do later on.
Right now is the perfect time to do this in my life because of my schedule at Peaches.
I know going to nursing school will be most weekdays, so having a job that allows me the freedom to actually attend school is such an amazing thing.
Bash and I won’t find out for a few weeks if we were accepted, and the program is going to take us a couple years to complete, but knowing I’m working toward something has me so excited about what the future holds.
Slamming down the lid of my computer, I squeal, jumping off the couch. “Can you imagine if we get in together?”
“It’ll be nice to have someone to do this with. The classes are going to be hard as hell; I already know that. But we can be study buddies!” Bash’s excitement is infectious, and it’s making me even more pumped. “We need to celebrate!”
He rushes over to his refrigerator, pulling out a pitcher of something green. He takes two glasses down from the cabinet, then fills each one to the brim.
“What is it?” I ask, placing the glass under my nose and inhaling. If I know Bash, this drink has a shit ton of alcohol in it.
“It’s a green apple sangria. So damn delicious and refreshing. It’s my go-to drink now. And it doesn’t even have a lot of alcohol in it.”
Taking a sip, I choke on the amount of liquor in my cup. “Uh. Yeah, sure, I barely taste the alcohol.” I cough, wondering how the hell he thinks there’s barely any liquor in this.
“Come on, let’s go sit on the couch.”
Bash and I grab our glasses while he circles back to grab the pitcher. We relax on the sofa, my glass getting refilled a couple of times as we’re talking.
“Okay, can I ask you a personal question?” I ask, laughing, the alcohol truly taking over.
“Oh god,” he groans. “No, I won’t have sex with you.”
“What? No, that’s not it. I have Oak for that. I wanted to ask you about what happened with your stepbrother. I was so curious before, but I didn’t have the courage to ask.” Waving my glass of sangria in the air, I smile. “Hello, courage.”
“Oh, it was a while ago. My father married his mom when we were teens. Things happened. Then stuff went down. I ended up living with my grandma.”
“Because of your stepbrother?” I ask, taking another sip of my drink. “Did your parents find out? Did they kick you out?”
“Kind of? It was a mix of things. I try not to think about it, to be honest. I was sixteen when it happened, and I haven’t seen him since.” He shrugs his shoulders, glancing to the other side of the room.
“Damn. Are your parents still married?”
“Yep. I still see my dad sometimes, not because I want to, though. My grandma still tries to get us to talk, but eh, screw him.” He gulps down his drink, then reaches out, grabbing the pitcher and filling up his cup.
“I’m sorry.”
“You have nothing to be sorry for. Besides, I’m doing just fine.
” He lifts his glass to mine, and we tap them together, saying “Cheers” in unison.
“Wait!” Bash yells, sitting up, his glass of sangria sloshing all over the sides.
“Oh, shit, dizzy.” He collects himself, then scoots closer to me, getting right in my face.
“Did I or did I not hear you correctly, saying you have Oak for sex when I turned you down?”
“Well, first, you didn’t turn me down because I didn’t ask or imply I wanted to have sex with you.”
“Why wouldn’t you?” He smiles, gesturing up and down his body. He’s wearing a matching purple fishnet skirt and crop top, which he can absolutely pull off. I can admit he’s a good-looking guy, but I can’t imagine trying to have sex with him.
“You’re cute, but I’m okay.”
He giggles, waving his hand in front of my face. “Wait, you still haven’t answered me!” His body wobbles, and he sits back down on the couch. “Shit, I may be drunk.”
Laughing, I shake my head. “Same. But fine, I’ll answer you. Oak and I might have started having sex.”
“Might? What the hell? There is no might. It’s either you’re having sex, or you aren’t. Might? Psh. What the hell is might?”
“Okay, we started having sex.”
“Oh my god,” Bash squeals, jumping up onto his knees and leaning closer to me. “Tell me everything. The last time we talked about you and Oak, you thought I was crazy for saying you should try to kiss him.”
“I honestly don’t even know. One night, we joked about how everyone always thinks we’re together, and one of us suggested we kiss. And we loved it. So then someone might have suggested a little bit more, and then the next thing I know, I’m riding his cock almost every day.”
Bash spits out his drink, hurrying to wipe up the mess he just made. “Shit, sorry, but oh my god, Cole! When did this happen?”
“Right after we talked about it, honestly.”
“Damn,” he murmurs, smiling brightly. “I’m so damn jealous. Oak is hot as fuck. So, does that mean you’re dating?”
“What? No, we’re not dating,” I say, flabbergasted.
“So, what are you doing? Just hooking up? That’s okay too.”
“I wouldn’t say it’s hooking up either. I don’t know what to call it exactly.” I say, my fingers drifting along the rim of the glass. We never talked about what we’re actually doing. All I know is I don’t plan to stop, and I hope he doesn’t either.
“Okay, let me ask you this,” he says, scooting closer to me. “How does he make you feel?”
I think about Oakley, and a smile crosses my face. “He’s my soulmate, my other half. I wouldn’t want to live this life without him.”
“It sounds like you’re in love with your best friend.”
“Of course, I love him.”
“No, Cole.” Bash snickers, smacking my chest. “In love with him. Like you want to be boyfriends. Kiss him, love him, spend the rest of your life with him.”
Nodding my head, I smile, because that sounds perfect. “That sounds like what I’ve always planned to do.”
“Okay, what if I say this? What happens if you’re having sex, kissing all the time, and then Oakley gets a girlfriend? Or hell, even a boyfriend, since apparently he likes men too. How would you feel then?”
I think about what would happen if Oak told me he found someone he wanted to be with for the rest of his life.
If he wanted to kiss them every day. Or fuck them.
Or shit, have them fuck him. What if there was someone else who longed to cuddle all night?
To wake up to in the morning or try to surprise at random times.
My stomach twists, and tears prick my eyes at the thought of losing Oakley.
“Fuck. I’m in love with Oak. I’m in love with my best friend, aren’t I?”
“Yeah, sweetie, you are. You let your best friend fuck you, and now you’re in love with him.”
“Oh, god.” I roll my eyes, shoving at his shoulder.
“That’s not what happened. I’m pretty sure I’ve always been in love with him.
” Which is true. What I’m feeling for Oakley isn’t something new.
I’ve always loved him, but now I see how deep I love him.
The fact that there has never been another person for me and how every decision I’ve ever made in my life has included him should have clued me in a long time ago at how much I’ve loved him.
“I think you have been, hun.”
“I need to tell him.” Jumping off the couch, I stumble, tripping over my feet, catching myself on the sofa. “Shit,” I mutter, frantically smacking around my jeans, trying to find my phone. “I need to go tell him.”
Bash reaches out, trying to grab hold of my arm, but misses as he giggles. “I agree, but you can’t drive. We both drank way too much to operate a vehicle right now.”
“Damn it, you’re right.” Pulling out my phone, I swipe up on the screen, trying to call Oak.
“Well, shit, you can’t tell him over the phone either,” Bash huffs, trying to snatch the device away from me.
“No, shit. I’m going to call him and ask him to pick me up. Or should I Uber? Fuck, I need to see him.” Unlocking my phone, I pull up my contact list, clicking on Oak’s name.
“Hey, baby.”
Baby.
Fuck, he melts my heart. I don’t even remember when he started calling me baby, but it seems so damn natural falling from his lips. Like he’s always called me that. Damn, I must have been really fucking oblivious to never realize I’m in love with him.
“I need to see you.”
“Is everything okay? What’s wrong?” His voice becomes panicked, things scattering in the background as he starts moving around.
“I drank too much with Bash,” I chuckle, shaking my head. “So, I can’t drive. But I want to see you.”
“Do you need me to come and get you?”
“Yes, please. I’m at Bash’s.”
“I’ll be right there.”
Hanging up the phone, I turn to Bash, who’s staring at me intently. “He’s on his way. Fuck.”
“You’re not going to tell him at my apartment, are you? Like you’re going to wait until it’s just the two of you at your own place. Because if you start fucking on my couch, I can’t guarantee I won’t stay and watch.”
“Well, duh. Because if I tell him and he says he doesn’t feel the same, I’ll be crushed. I don’t need you witnessing that.”
“Trust me, honey, I doubt he’ll say he doesn’t feel the same.”