Chapter 34
34
Three.
That’s how many times I’ve been to the studio this week.
It’s empty, and I’ve yet to select a name.
Damien came home yesterday with a new name brainstorming notebook , as he called it.
Ten.
That’s how many times I’ve begged my mother to see the studio, but she refuses. She won’t even let Lanie come.
My back is against the mirrored wall, my knees pulled to my chest, and tears fall down my cheeks as I stare ahead at the blurred moving traffic.
Fucking broken.
That’s been my state nearly every day.
This should be the happiest time of my life, but instead, I’m falling apart.
My gaze slips to the door when it opens. Damien’s loafers squeak against the hardwood as he moves across the room toward me. His perfect face falls slack when his eyes meet my sorrow-filled ones. I peer down, an attempt to hide my pain from him .
He places my dance bag on the floor before sitting across from me.
“Baby,” he whispers, his voice hoarse, “look at me.”
I shake my head, glaring at the floor as if it were my worst enemy.
“I can’t,” I sob. “I want this. I want it so, so bad , but I can’t have it.”
He scoots closer, our knees brushing.
I shudder when he slides his hand between my thighs to capture my face in his hand. My chin shakes as he lifts it with two fingers.
He waits until I meet his eyes before brushing his knuckle against my cheek. “Yes, you can. You deserve this, Pippa.”
I shake my head violently.
“Do it for you. I’ll be by your side every step of the way.”
“My mom and Lanie—they’re all I have,” I cry out. “My dad left. Her family disowned her. We’re all alone, and now, I’m turning my back on them. Hurting them .”
A slight wince crosses his face at what I said. “That’s where you’re wrong, baby. You also have me.” Another brush of his knuckle. “Amara, Antonio, Emilio, Julian, all the dancers who will come in here. You’ll change their lives and give them the same dream as you—to dance. Good things will come from this.”
“They’re your family.” I sniffle and use my arm to wipe away the snot under my nose. It’s gross, but Damien doesn’t even cringe at it.
“If they didn’t care for you, they’d refuse to be around you. Emilio wouldn’t have texted me, worried, telling me to get here to you. They might not show emotion, but they care. I care .”
“My mom?—”
He presses a finger to my lips. “She’ll be hurt at first, but eventually, she’ll realize you did what’s best for you. When Cernach screws her over, you’ll have this for her to fall back on.” His hand runs over my face once more before lowering to my trembling hand. “Come on. Let’s see your dance. Break your new studio in, baby.”
My breathing hitches when he rises to his knees, unzips the bag, and then helps me lace up my pointe shoes. I timidly smile at him while he helps me to my feet, doing the same. He makes sure I’m stable before setting me free.
Crossing his arms, he gives me a head nod and rests his back against the wall, waiting.
I inhale.
Exhale.
Inhale. Exhale.
A grin breaks out across his face as I start to dance.
I shut my eyes, swaying into my own world.
A world of peace and passion and love.
A world I wish I could stay in forever.