16. Heaven
CHAPTER 16
HEAVEN
H e’s going to shoot me.
Everything in my body turns to ice as I stare at him. I can’t lunge at him because he’s so fucked up, he’ll pull the trigger. His pupils are too big, and he’s probably coked up too, or worse.
“Conor,” I say, raising my hands, trying to think my way out of this.
“Make a move, you bitch. Go on. I wanna pull this trigger so fucking badly, you have no idea!” Conor starts to laugh. “Maybe I will. And then everything’s gonna be mine.”
Before I can say a word, a gun cocks behind me.
“Conor,” Matteo says, his rich voice cold and hard and flat. “You pull the trigger, you even think of pulling the trigger, and everything will be yours for exactly half a minute. Because I’ll shoot you. I’ll shoot your dick off first, then I’ll shoot you in the throat, and while you’re writhing in pain and drowning in your own blood, you’ll want to beg for me to finish you. And I’ll make you wait until the last second, stretch out that pain before I end you.”
Conor’s hand wavers a little.
Matteo continues in that same tone. “Or maybe I’ll shoot off your dick and pump you full of some of these drugs laying around in here to keep you awake and call in one of my…specialists. She likes to play. And she knows how to keep you alive and in agony while carving pieces of you from your body. Break your bones, pull out your fingernails. Pluck out your eyes and slice up your tongue. She’ll make anything Dominguez might do seem like a walk in the park.”
A dark stain appears in the front of Conor’s jeans, and the room starts to stink with the stench of piss.
“So be a good boy and drop your gun, otherwise I’ll make all your nightmares come true.”
Conor’s finger moves off the trigger.
“ Amore mio , take the gun from the bastard.”
I don’t need to be told twice. I snatch it from his hand and hold it, the strength going from my legs.
Matteo is there, his body against mine, the gun in his hand steady and sure and trained on my brother.
“You’re bleeding, Heaven. Are you okay?”
I give a quick nod.
“Do you want him alive or dead?”
“He can live for now.”
“Unless he pisses me the fuck off again. Are you going to do that, Conor?” Matteo asks.
Conor pulls the pen out of his shoulder and glares. He’s fucked up, that’s more than obvious, and I’m sure Matteo knows. But I also suspect he’d kill my brother without a second thought if he wanted to.
Conor flings the pen down and takes a swaying step toward Matteo. “You think I’m afraid of you? You think I’m intimidated by your fucking army and your family? Well, I’m not.”
“I think you’re stupid and a waste of my time, and if you’re not scared of me, then you’re even stupider than I thought. I can and will kill you if I choose. So leave your sister alone.”
Conor’s face flushes, his eyes glassy. “This organization is mine.”
“Only if I keep you alive. Then it’s half yours,” Matteo says. “And soon it’ll be half ours .”
A tiny shiver runs through me when he says the word ours .
Suddenly Matteo slams the gun into the side of Conor’s skull, and he stumbles, falling to the floor and clutching his head. Matteo kicks him in the face and then, as Conor howls, writhing on the floor, he presses his shoe down, hard, against my brother’s neck.
“Take your broken nose as my wedding gift to you. I’ll protect your pathetic ass from Dominguez, but there’ll be rules. And I’ll be informing your father of this incident, along with the rules.”
He stares down at my brother and perhaps I should do something, say something, but honestly, I’m enjoying seeing Conor get served his ass.
“Rules are, no stealing. You steal from your family, you steal from me. You step out of line on the job, look at the wrong person in the wrong way, and you’ll feel the pain from me and my people. You’re meant to be an underboss, not a fuckup, so act like one.”
“I don’t do what you say, brother.”
Matteo presses harder on Conor’s neck and he gurgles. “Yes, you do. I own you. I’m protecting you, that’s true. But I’m protecting your whole family, and accidents happen. Get your fucking act together.”
“Matteo.”
Conor’s face is turning a mottled brick color, his fingers grappling weakly against Matteo’s foot and his eyes are starting to bulge.
After the shit he pulled I want my brother to suffer, but I don’t want him dead, no matter how much he deserves it. He’s flying high, fucked up out of his skull, and while that’s no excuse, this isn’t normal Conor behavior.
“Matteo, you’ll kill him.”
“Maybe I should. The world won’t miss him.”
“He’s my brother.”
Matteo presses harder and then sighs, lifting his foot, and Conor gasps in ugly deep breaths of air. My fiancé still doesn’t let him up, resting his foot on my brother’s upper chest instead.
“Your sister has a heart. I don’t. I don’t give a fuck if you live or die, Conor. But for her I’m giving you a chance. Just the one. But know this, next time you so much as look at your sister wrong, I’ll fucking make good on my promises.” He kneels down next to Conor, who is still groaning. “ Brother ,” he says, contempt dripping from his words. “You just make this whole thing too easy for me.”
I frown. What’s that supposed to mean?
Before I can ask, or say anything, Matteo straightens up and sticks his gun back into the waistband of his pants before dragging me out of the dingy building by my uninjured arm.
He cuts a look at me. “Do not fucking speak.”
Once we’re back in the car, he examines the slash on my arm, but I pull away, trembling. Not over what happened in there, and not because of the fierce anger emanating from Matteo.
No, I’m trembling because of the soft touch of his hand on my arm, the concern in his face, the shift in the air between us.
Something changed back in there, and I’m free falling.
Deliberately, I focus on what happened with my brother. And I close my eyes a moment. “Conor?—”
“Is fucking lucky I didn’t end his pathetic life.” Matteo’s voice is quiet, but it’s pure, ice-cold steel and it makes my pulse flutter for reasons I don’t comprehend. “And you? I should punish you within an inch of yours for disobeying me.”
“I don’t follow your orders, Matteo,” I say, looking at him.
“Take off your jacket.” He leans forward and opens the glove box, pulling out a small first-aid kit.
I frown. “I don’t need?—”
“Choose your battles wisely, Heaven. This isn’t a good one, and neither was that.” He’s eased the jacket off me and is now examining my arm. And I’m…letting him. “You don’t think he’d have killed you?”
“Honestly? I don’t know.”
“There was coke, bud, and crystal in there. From the smell, they were also smoking the coke. Turning it into crack. Add the booze, and...” He applies some alcohol and I hiss. Matteo smiles, but then it fades. “Next time I make good on my promise. No one dares hurt what’s mine.”
My heart’s thumping a wild beat against my ribs. “That’s what I am? Your property?”
“I’m not a modern man in that respect, amore mio . I’m possessive, and I want you in one piece.”
A strange look comes over his face, but it’s gone so soon I probably just imagined it. “Good to know you’re at the caveman stage.”
“It’s not deep enough for stitches,” he says, patching me up like an emergency medical technician.
“What a pro you are at this.”
He shrugs. “Occupational hazard, I guess. I think the biggest danger to you is probably tetanus.”
“I’m up to date on my shots.”
“Good,” Matteo murmurs, running his fingers over the bandage, his blue eyes dark. Heat coils in my belly. “You’re okay with all this? Back there?”
“No.” I swat his fingers away as they run lightly along my cheek. A hint of a smile appears as Matteo drops his hand to my thigh. “That might have been fueled by drugs, but the sentiment was all him. He’s dangerous to the whole family business.”
“Then we do something about it.”
I nod.
Matteo shifts in his seat, the medical kit between us as he lifts his hand and cups my chin, easing my face toward him. His mouth brushes mine and then he kisses me, so soft and sweet I’m tumbling through the air. When he lifts his head, he doesn’t say a word.
How he can be so cool, so calm, so untouched after that kiss is anyone’s guess. Me? I’m a maelstrom of emotion inside, and there’s nothing to cling to.
Except, perhaps, my anger. “Take me to my father. He needs to hear about this, all of it. The money, the attack, everything.” I tug at my ponytail, waiting for Matteo to start the car. The rush of anger comes fast and furious, immersing me in Conor’s toxic aura. “What are you waiting for? We need to handle this now.”
But instead of starting the car, he touches my hand.
“Matteo,” I say. “Let’s go.”
He shakes his head. “No. If you think he doubted you before, he definitely will now if you go in there on a rampage.”
“Are you fucking kidding me?” I pull free of his touch. “I’m just supposed to forget about it?”
“Not at all. You need to be calm when you go to him.”
“You’re the one who threatened to chop Conor into little pieces.”
A ghost of a smile touches his lips. “I didn’t threaten. And it isn’t the point. It’s all a game, Heaven. I know how these things work. Declan knows Conor is a fuckup. But you won’t gain anything by shoving that into your dad’s face. He doesn’t need anyone to tell him what a liability Conor is.”
“Then how can he possibly think that Conor can run things?” I clench my hands into fists. “Conor said I’d never be boss, that Dad’s never giving that role to me. What if he’s right? After everything I’ve done, could my father really fuck me like that and put that asshole in charge? I could have let you kill him.”
“And I would have,” Matteo says. “In a heartbeat. Men like Conor are liabilities. But he’s your brother and you said no. He’s also high as fuck. Let me ask you something.”
“You can ask, but there’s no guarantee I’ll answer.”
“Has he done this before?”
“No.” There have been fights and arguments but… “That was something new. I’ve seen Conor in most states, but that…that was different.”
“Conor is digging his own grave,” Matteo says darkly. “So far into the ground that he’s going to hit the Earth’s core. But this is, as I said, a game. And it’s a man’s game whether you like it or not. You have to play by the rules, Heaven.”
“I don’t want to.”
“Got that, loud and clear. And yet you are. You don’t want to be here with me and you fight the entire time, but you understand your role and the sacrifices you need to make. You running your mouth to Declan makes you look bad, not Conor. It tells your father you can’t handle dissent in the field; worse, that you can’t handle personal shit with your brother.” He runs a hand through his hair and a thick lock falls over one of his eyes. My fingers itch to push it back, to run down the side of his face, to stroke the back of his neck and?—
No. I don’t want that at all. I clench my hands harder, the pain from my cut bringing me back down. “That’s bullshit.”
“Yes,” he says. “It is. And it’s how things are done. You go in there complaining?—”
“Not complaining, informing him.”
“Complaining is what it will seem like, Heaven. What’s that Irish saying about wisdom and knowing what you can and can’t change?”
I stare at him. “God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, accept the things I can’t, and the wisdom to know the difference?”
“That.”
“I might be Irish Catholic, but I’m not religious?—”
“For fuck’s sake, amore mio , I’m trying to tell you something. Understand that at its core and you’ll be able to take what’s yours.”
My heart lurches. “Who are you and what have you done with Matteo?”
“Maybe it’s you, Heaven. And you know I’m right. Besides, we’re going to be married. I want success just as much as you do.”
Things have shifted and I don’t know what to do with it. If I didn’t know better, I’d say what happened in there cracked something open in Matteo, and maybe, just maybe there’s a glimmer of something good. Like this, I could learn to not hate him. I’m already attracted to him, but maybe he isn’t such a sleaze. And maybe I can find a way to take something pleasurable from this forced union.
And he’s right. I know it. Anything I tell Dad will be twisted by Conor, who won’t emerge until he’s no longer on his bender. And I’ll look hysterical. Fuck.
“Conor expects you to run right to Declan. Don’t do it. Don’t give him the satisfaction. Guys like Conor always fall hard if you lead them to the edge of the cliff.”
“Okay.” I swallow hard. “Let’s go home.”
“Home,” he says, staring at me. “That sounds good.”
He starts the car and heads down 11 th Avenue.
When we finally pull up near his loft in SoHo, Matteo eyes me. “Heaven, you’re an asset to your family. Conor’s full of shit. He didn’t know what the hell he was talking about, and pretty soon, it won’t matter anyway.”
I frown. That’s the second time he’s said something off. “Why do you keep saying that stuff? You were hired to keep us safe from the cartel. But you keep talking like there’s something else going on.”
Matteo’s back stiffens and his jaw tightens. “No. Guys like Conor can’t be saved. They always fall because they’re never smart enough to learn from their mistakes. They just keep making new ones that are more dangerous than the last ones.”
“That’s not it.”
“Don’t read into things that aren’t there, Heaven.” He gets out of the car and comes to my side, holding out his hand as I open the door.
I ignore it. “Or maybe I’m seeing stuff you don’t want me to know.”
He says something in Italian and I’m pretty sure he’s swearing. Matteo hustles me across the sidewalk and up the stairs to the Fort Knox door. Once we’re inside, he pushes me back into it, and that hum of awareness revs right up to high.
“You see things that aren’t there. Your fucking brother pulled a gun on you. Sliced you with a broken bottle. I should have killed him where he stood.”
I shouldn’t be turned on right now, I know that. But I am. If he slipped his hand down into my jeans, he’d find me wet and possibly willing. I narrow my eyes, needing to fight, to find my self-control. This man is dangerous in more ways than I ever thought.
“You can’t,” I say softly, the taunt clear. “Because ultimately, you’re just an employee.”
“Don’t fuck with me, Heaven. And don’t think you can play me. You’ll never, ever win.”
I run my fingers down his torso, over the muscles hidden by his clothes and down the front of his pants where I wrap them around his growing hard-on. “But I can, because this makes you weak.”
“Watch it, Heaven. As I said, actions have consequences.”
“You talk the talk, Matteo, but really, you’re just the grunt worker. The muscle. The meat without a brain. Is that why you want me? Not just to fuck, but to run things?”
He takes hold of my wrist, but he doesn’t pull my hand free. Instead, he pumps it up and down on him as he grinds into me. “Depends on how you’re going to run things. If it’s you getting me off, then I’m down. If you think you can order me around, oh, amore mio , you’re a fucking fool.” He dips his head against my ear, his tongue tracing the delicate, sensitive skin. “And I don’t think you’re anything near a fool.”
“Let go of me.”
“Get on your knees, Heaven. Put that mouth to good use. I bet it feels like heaven fucking your throat.”
My knees tremble and my blood throbs in my veins. I realize with horror he’s no longer working my hand. I am, and I’m seconds from doing what he said.
I want to taste him.
I want him in me.
With some kind of superwoman effort, I let go and shove him hard.
Matteo doesn’t move.
I lift my hand to slap him, to try anything at all to get him away from me before I lose the last shreds of my control.
But he captures my hands, squeezing my wrist as he brings my palm up to his mouth. He licks the center, his blue eyes glittering with savage intent, and I’m so turned on I can barely breathe.
“Here’s what’s going to happen. We’re moving the wedding up. You’re mine, Heaven, don’t forget it.”
“This isn’t the Dark Ages.”
“And never try and hit me again, not unless you want to play. I always play to win, and you might not like what I do to you.”
“Threats, Matteo?”
He grins, and it’s heated and wild and devastating, and liquid need spreads through me. “Promises, Heaven. I can give you orgasms. I can force them. I can withhold them, too. Remember that.”
He steps back and releases me and suddenly I can breathe again.
“You won’t ever be touching me.”
“We both know that’s a lie. And I think I’m going to need to show you exactly how serious I am, Heaven. Tonight, you’re going to learn your lesson.”