Chapter 9 #2
The gentle action from this bulk of a man was such a contradiction that all she could do was stare at him. Take in his features, the warmth in his eyes, the insistent set of his chin, the alluring stubble.
“You were mad at me,” she said.
“I owe you an apology. I can’t tell you how terrifying it was to hear my own address on the speaker at the station. I was out of my mind when we got there. My anger wasn’t directed at you…or it shouldn’t have been.”
Andie hadn’t known Clay would respond to the alarm, hadn’t given it any thought. Hadn’t realized firefighters would show up along with the paramedics.
“I admit I hesitated to call you this morning. If I hadn’t, though, she might not be alive right now.” His voice was rough, ragged. “I don’t know how to thank you for reacting so fast.”
She started to shake her head, but he grasped her wrist and gave her a stern look.
“It made all the difference in the world. She could’ve been so much worse off if you hadn’t called immediately.”
The terror from earlier bubbled up and nearly suffocated her. Her tears finally overflowed and ran down her cheeks.
“It’s not adequate,” he said, “but thank you.”
She saw such sincerity in his eyes, through her damn tears, that she could’ve collapsed in relief. “I’m…” Her voice wasn’t working right. She cleared her throat. “So glad she’s okay.”
Saying the words out loud released the last of her pent-up fear, and she did the worst thing she could do at that moment. She started crying in earnest. Not just little sniffs and sharp inhales. Oh, no. Her shoulders shook and all the emotions came out in ugly sobs.
Clay pulled her to him, wrapping those mammoth arms around her. She buried her head in his shoulder and fought for control to avoid waking up Payton. He was the last person she wanted to break down in front of.
He pressed his lips to her hair. Andie kept her face down, taking long, unsteady breaths, trying to fight through the emotions that had blindsided her.
As she gradually calmed down, she became more aware of the man who held her.
He caressed her back with long, slow strokes, up and down.
His chin rested on the top of her head. The chest beneath her face was solid, reassuring. Hard. Alluring.
She stirred, suddenly overly conscious of the heat where her body aligned with his—her abdomen and thighs were pressed into him. Even though he wore long pants and a fire department T-shirt, she could feel the muscle, the ins and outs of his body, as if he were unclothed.
Bad line of thinking, she realized as her body reacted.
Andie reached between them to wipe her eyes.
When she looked at him, his gaze bored down on her.
Before she could school herself and do the smart thing, he glanced at her lips and she was screwed.
She wanted his mouth on hers again. Couldn’t have walked away from it if the building had been in flames.
Except…apparently he could, because he raised his chin, then looked beyond her to his daughter. Andie backed away, feeling like an idiot for wanting so badly what he’d just passed up with no problem. Again.
The nurse who’d shown Andie to the room breezed in. Clay turned to her while Andie tried to shake off his effect on her.
“All set to go,” the nurse said. “Dr. Milton signed everything. We just need to review Payton’s care instructions with you.” She set down a stack of papers next to Clay.
Andie half listened as the nurse gave him directions.
Payton stirred while the nurse was still talking, and Andie was surprised when the girl reached out for her and asked her to pick her up. When Andie lifted her, Payton threw her skinny arms around her neck and hugged her tight.
“When we get home,” Andie said quietly, “I have something for you to borrow.”
“What’s borrow?”
“It means you can use it for a few days and then give it back to me when you don’t need it.”
“What is it?” Payton asked, lighting up despite exhaustion.
“His name is Lyle. He’s a teddy bear who loves to get hugs.” She rested her forehead on Payton’s. “Interested?”
“Lyle?” Payton giggled. “Okay!”
“Okay then.” Andie closed her eyes and breathed in the baby shampoo scent of the girl’s hair, never once before having guessed that hugging a child could be so…comforting.
When she opened her eyes, she caught Clay’s gaze on her but couldn’t read his thoughts. His arms were crossed, and he rubbed his chin with one hand—a capable, strong hand that captured Andie’s attention like it hadn’t before.
The nurse left and Andie carried Payton over to Clay. His daughter tried to spring toward him, making her difficult to hold on to until Clay stepped in. Andie’s body brushed his as she handed Payton over, and she was overwhelmed by the idea of the three of them.
Andie quickly relinquished the little girl, weak and nauseous at the direction of her thoughts.
Once Clay had Payton, Andie flipped her arm over so she could see the long white scar there.
The scar—one of them— caused by Trevor. It was a reminder, whenever she needed it, of what could happen when you trusted someone.
She was leaving in three weeks. Because she wanted to. Leaving these two people, both Payton and Clay, wouldn’t be easy, but it would be necessary.
She rubbed the raised scar, over and over.