Chapter 19
“You sure went MIA last night at the reception,” Evan said to Clay as they finished their third treadmill mile of the afternoon.
They were the only two in the fire station’s workout room at the moment.
“Anything to do with our favorite dark-haired Harley rider, who, coincidentally, also seemed to be missing?”
Clay stopped the treadmill, wiped the sweat from his face with a towel, and took a long drink from his water bottle.
“Thought we were doing four today,” Evan said, still running.
Shaking his head, Clay went over to the weight machine. He started his upper body workout without a word.
Evan ran for another five minutes. Clay threw himself into another set of reps, blocking out all thoughts of Andie.
The noise of the treadmill stopped and Evan came over to the weights.
He situated himself on the bench press after making adjustments to the machine.
“I’m going to take a wild guess and say this black mood of yours has to do with Andie.
” Clay counted ten reps and then slowly released the weights.
He swigged some more water and readjusted the machine to work a different muscle.
Evan still lay flat on his back on the bench, not lifting, just watching Clay expectantly.
Dammit. Clay blew out a breath and looked at the ceiling. Eyed the punching bag hanging across the room. “I screwed up, man.”
He stretched his arms up and put his hands on the back of his head, closed his eyes, and beat himself up one more fucking time.
“Screwed up how?”
“With Andie.”
Evan finally started benching and Clay moved over to the free weights.
“What’d you do to her?” Evan asked when he paused between sets.
“Nothing.” Well, last night sure as hell wasn’t nothing. “I’ve known since I met her I shouldn’t get involved.”
“So what’s wrong with a little fun for one night?”
Clay tried a set of biceps curls and stopped when he lost count.
Evan stared at him in the mirror.
“Ah, shit,” Evan said, then switched his gaze from the mirror to look directly at Clay. “You’re in deep.”
Clay did his best to keep his expression unreadable. “It was one night, Drake.”
“You don’t do a lot of ‘one nights.’”
“Just because I’m not a man-whore like you used to be doesn’t mean I don’t know what I’m doing.”
“So what are you doing?”
Clay blew out what breath he had. “Playing with goddamn fire.”
“You care about her?”
“Hell yeah, I care about her. Some of us don’t sleep with a woman unless we care about her.”
Evan grinned. “Roger.”
“But she’s not telling me something.”
He explained about the gun, the disappearance last night, the lack of a straight answer. “She was involved with some jackass who beat her. You don’t just walk away from something like that and pick back up with a normal life.”
“See your point. But you’re falling for her.”
“I’ve been down this road before. Nothing good can come of it.”
“You mean with Robin? You think Andie’s like your ex?”
Clay considered the question. The two women were nothing alike. Except… “Andie’s used to being alone, being accountable to nobody. She doesn’t trust me.”
“Have you confronted her about what she’s hiding?”
Clay nodded. “She won’t open up and bare all.”
“Sounds like she bared enough.”
“Aren’t you supposed to grow the hell up once you get married and have kids?”
“I sincerely hope not,” Evan said.
“Then there’s the way Andie lives, drifting all over the country. That’s not normal, is it?”
“No, man. I’d advise a little caution. Before you get too involved.”
“You think I should stay away from her? Derek trusts her.”
“Derek isn’t sleeping with her. Derek doesn’t have a kid either. You have to put your daughter’s safety first.”
“I know that,” Clay said, annoyed not only because Evan was acting as if Clay was an idiot but because he’d had these thoughts already himself.
If it were just him, and Andie presented some kind of mystery, he wouldn’t let it bother him much.
She was only on the island for another week or so.
They could see each other and he didn’t have to know everything she was hiding.
He went over to the punching bag and pummeled it repeatedly with both fists.
“So what, we got the big L word here?” Evan asked.
“It wasn’t just sex.”
Evan nodded. “Happens to the best of us. Does she know?”
Clay shook his head. “We made an agreement when she came to town. I was worried about the custody hearing. She’s the one who figured out a judge could use her against me.”
“When’s the hearing?”
“Thursday.”
“What about after that? You’ll have your answer for Payton, for better or worse, but there’s no more danger of what being with Andie could cause.”
“Then she leaves.”
“You okay with that? Just letting her go?”
The thought of not seeing her again made it difficult to breathe. Even before last night, he’d gotten used to knowing she was close by whenever he walked down the stairs, past her door to the ground level. He couldn’t imagine anyone else living in her half of the duplex.
“She’s still Andie,” he said. “The woman who’d rather hop on her bike and ride away than plant any roots.”
“Then you might have to let her go.”
He just might, and that brought him right back to where he’d started. Screwed.
There were advantages to the presence of a chattering four-year-old, Clay thought as he pulled into Bud’s parking lot on Tuesday morning.
Payton, who’d insisted on tying her hair back with a bandanna just as she’d seen Andie do, had allowed him and Andie to avoid an awkward silence by grilling Andie.
She’d been fascinated to learn that girls could ride motorcycles too, and their discussion had turned into Andie’s “girls can do anything” speech.
Another message Payton’s mother had apparently never thought to deliver to her daughter.
Clay parked the truck and his eyes met Andie’s. Andie had been cordial when she’d knocked on his door to tell him her bike was ready for them to pick up. When he’d first seen her, the urge to pull her close and kiss her had overwhelmed him, but he’d held back.
Clay helped his daughter down to the pavement. Andie hurried ahead of them like an excited child herself, carrying her helmet, and Clay smiled.
The hard-edged woman squealed like a girl when Bud rolled her dark red Harley out of the garage. She showed more emotion for that hunk of metal than anything else on God’s green earth. Clay shook his head, not sure if he was amused or insulted.
“It’s cool!” Payton said, jumping up and down beside Clay.
Andie turned and held her hand out to Payton.
“You should give it a tattube of a butterfly right here.” Payton pointed.
“I like that idea, Pay.” Andie circled the motorcycle slowly, inspecting every inch, then put her helmet on. “I’m going to take it around the block. See how it rides.”
Bud nodded.
“Can I come?” Payton asked.
“I don’t have a helmet for you,” Andie said.
“Got a kid-size one you can borrow,” Bud said, walking toward a worktable that held several large parts and an assortment of helmets.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Clay said.
Andie met his gaze. “Tell you what.” She leaned down to Payton’s level. “If you can convince your dad, maybe we can ride up and down the alley one time where there’s no traffic. A slow ride.”
“Please, Daddy?”
“I’d be careful,” Andie said.
He didn’t have a chance when the two of them ganged up on him. “No more than fifteen miles per hour?”
“If it’ll go that slow,” Andie said.
“Forget—”
“Kidding, Clay.”
It was only the alley. “You hold on to Andie at all times,” he said finally.
Payton cheered and ran up to Bud to get the small white helmet he offered.
Clay went out to the edge of Bud’s lot to watch the ride, up one way, a slow turn around at the end, and back down to the opposite end.
When they rode by, Payton waved, a wide grin on her face.
As they approached the lot at the end of the ride, he went inside the garage to settle up, secure in the knowledge that Payton had survived her first motorcycle ride.
Bud handed him a detailed sales slip. Clay handed him a credit card and strolled back to the open doorway of the garage to check on the girls.
Andie removed her helmet and hung it from the handlebars, then ran her fingers through her hair. She climbed off, lifted Payton down, talking to his daughter the whole time though Clay was too far away to make out what she said. Then she pulled off Payton’s helmet as well.
Clay was about to turn around and finish paying when Payton threw her arms around Andie’s legs, full of pure four-year-old joy. Andie laughed as she picked her up, swung her around, and then hugged her. Something in Clay’s chest shifted as he watched them.
He was rooted to the spot because of the realization that struck him.
Andie was the right woman for him. For them.
He’d been so caught up in his own self-doubt all these weeks, his inability to trust his instincts, that he’d looked for all the ways she wasn’t right. Most of what he’d come up with was irrelevant. Tattoos. Motorcycle. Past mistakes.
Heck, if you went by past mistakes, Clay wasn’t the right guy to raise Payton.
But his daughter didn’t see his screw-ups from years ago.
It made no difference to Payton’s well-being that Clay had gotten caught drinking or racing on the highway or staying out all night a decade ago.
Just as it didn’t matter that Andie had been in desperate circumstances and done the wrong thing when she was younger.
All that mattered was the kind of people they were now.
There were so many ways Andie was right. She was giving and considerate once you dug down through a couple of layers of defensiveness. She might not be traditional in any way, but she was responsible, practical, down-to-earth.
She loved Payton, would do just about anything for her, and was one hell of a positive influence on his little girl’s life. Andie treated Payton like a person, not an inconvenience. She shared herself with Payton, tattoos, bandannas, and all, shared her time.
He’d fallen in love with her nonconforming ways and refusal to bend to anyone’s idea of what she should be or do. The very traits he’d told himself were reasons to stay away were the ones that had drawn him in.
And she’d been spot on when she’d told him he needed to trust himself.
He tore his eyes away from this beautiful woman and his daughter to quickly finish the transaction with Bud.
“Biker girl,” he called as he exited the garage.
Both Andie and Payton turned to him, and Payton ran over, telling him all about the ride, as if he’d missed the whole thing. He picked her up and carried her to the truck, feeling lighter than he had in weeks.
“Climb in and get your seat belt on,” he told her. He shut the door and faced Andie. “She loved it.”
“Hope so. Maybe next time we can inch up to eighteen miles per hour.”
He barely registered her joke, his mind spinning.
“The custody hearing’s the day after tomorrow,” he said. “I was wondering if you would go with me.”
“Uh, Clay? It’s me, Andie. We agreed I wouldn’t do your case any good.”
“This isn’t about helping or hurting the case. You’re important to me, Andie. You’re the one I want sitting there with me.”
She studied him, confused. “I don’t want to cause you and Payton problems. If I cost you custody of her, I couldn’t live with myself.”
“If Lipp wants to use you against me, he’s already got everything he needs. He’s had plenty of time to investigate you, find all your skeletons. He can bring those up if he wants to, but I intend to fight every last negative thing he says about you. And I’d like to do it with you by my side.”
“Why?”
He moved closer to her, lowered his voice. “I happen to care about you. Beyond the other night, beyond the mind-blowing chemistry. You’re important to both of us.”
“Likewise,” she said shyly.
“Thursday’s huge for us. If we win, I want to celebrate with you. If we lose…” It would crush him.
Andie nodded. “I’ll be there if you’re sure I won’t do any harm.”
He grasped her hand, dying to kiss her. But Payton watched them from inside the truck, and he wasn’t sure enough about where they were heading to let her witness that. Not yet.
“Thank you,” he said. “Starts at ten o’clock.”
She smiled and walked to her bike. Clay watched her the whole way, his body reacting to the sway of her hips as always. But it went beyond physical now, and he finally recognized that, embraced it.
Now the question was, could he get her to level with him about whatever she was afraid of? And just as importantly, could he get her to stay?