Chapter 17
Knox
After three rounds with Quincy, I should’ve slept like the dead.
I didn’t.
Tryst number three had been just as out of this world as the first two, but as soon as Quincy had dozed off and my orgasm bliss faded away, anxiety set in.
Two hours later, as the sky was starting to lighten, I was still lying in my bed, lost in worries, with Quincy a couple of inches away.
I couldn’t regret what I’d done, but I needed to not do it again. Sleeping with the nanny wasn’t okay. Yes, it was consensual. Yes, Quincy had initiated it, not me. But giving in wasn’t smart.
As a caretaker of my daughter, Quincy was a godsend.
I couldn’t afford to screw that up in any way.
I knew there was an end date of January, and I’d have to find a new caretaker by then, but right now, the less upheaval in Juniper’s and my life, the better.
I was a man of routines, even though I worked for myself.
Juniper and I were still establishing routines, and Quincy was part of them. A big, crucial part.
I couldn’t afford to have feelings screw anything up. Even if we were to agree this was just a convenient physical relationship with no future, feelings could get hurt.
I rolled away from Quincy, putting more space between us, hoping she wouldn’t notice. It would’ve helped if she’d gone back to her own bed afterward. This sharing my bed was too intimate. It made it seem like more than just physical from the get-go.
The room was light enough now I could see pretty well. Quincy could wake up any minute. With the thoughts that had been rolling through my mind, that could only be awkward.
After ensuring she was still asleep, I rolled off the mattress as noiselessly as possible.
She didn’t stir, so I crept to my closet, pulled on some workout clothes, grabbed my running shoes, and exited the closet.
My gaze automatically went to Quincy to make sure she was still asleep.
I came to a full stop as I took in the sight of her.
Fuck, she was gorgeous.
She faced this way, and the blankets had dipped to reveal her bare breasts and slim shoulders. Her blond hair splayed over the pillow like golden silk. Her face was peaceful, her long lashes resting on her pretty cheeks. She looked so fucking young.
Not looked. Was. She was so fucking young.
The discomfort deep in my gut intensified.
Everything else aside, I was too old for her.
Fourteen years was almost old enough for me to be her father, for fuck’s sake.
She might say she didn’t care, but I sure as hell did.
She hadn’t even hit her thirties yet. The thirties were when people settled in and really started to figure themselves out.
Quincy still had so much of her future ahead of her, so much to figure out. I didn’t want to shut any of that down.
I made sure the monitor was on. Quincy was on Juniper duty, and I needed to get out of here.
After closing the bedroom door behind me, I went to the kitchen, put my shoes on, and took a windbreaker out of the coat closet.
I walked down the hall to the nursery, cracked the door open to check on Juniper, and assured myself she was still sound asleep.
I knew without a doubt that Quincy would handle her if she woke up.
I closed the door again, headed back through the kitchen, and went outside.
Normally I worked out at the gym, but there had been no “normal” since Juniper had showed up, and I hadn’t exercised at all. I considered hitting it today, but being penned in had about as much appeal as letting a semitruck run me over. I needed air and space.
I locked the door and inhaled deeply, hoping for relief from the shit storm in my head.
Oxygen did nothing for it. After stretching, I took off at a jog down the side of Lake Road.
It didn’t take long for my lungs to complain, but it felt good in a punishing way.
When I got to Henry’s and the intersection of Main Street, I kept going straight, avoiding the heart of town, toward the Honeysuckle Inn.
I wasn’t going to stop by the inn that had been my home for three months, not at this hour and not when it was a safe bet Cash was there. I’d see Ava soon anyway.
At the driveway to the inn, I turned around, increasing my pace. The pain took my mind off my situation. This time when I hit Main, I turned right and ran toward the square. The time was only about six thirty a.m., but there were people out and about, most of them exercising or walking dogs.
I pushed myself to get to the far side of the square, my out-of-practice lungs screaming at me and my legs starting to shake.
Worried I might embarrass myself if I didn’t rest, I headed toward one of the benches in the square and sat my sweaty, panting self down.
I leaned over with my elbows on my thighs, thinking I was a dumb ass not only for sleeping with my nanny but also for trying to kill myself with hard exercise after weeks off.
I let my head droop between my shoulders, too exhausted to people watch and not wanting to run into anyone I knew anyway.
I was starting to breathe evenly when I felt someone sit on the other end of the bench. My head still down, I caught sight of a jogger stroller with a toddler asleep in it. He had dark hair and cheeks as chubby as Juniper’s and couldn’t have been much older.
I straightened and glanced next to me, marginally surprised to see a young, fit guy instead of a woman.
“Hey,” he said with a friendly smile. “Want one?” He held out a full bottle of water, a half-full one in his other hand.
“Thanks, man.” I gratefully took it, screwed the top off, and guzzled half of it. “It’s been a few weeks since I’ve worked out. I managed to leave home without anything.”
“The stroller makes it easy to bring multiple,” the guy said.
“How old’s your boy?”
There was a strange hesitation before he said, “Eight months.”
“I have a five-month-old girl.”
“Congrats.”
“Same to you,” I said. Then for some reason, I continued, “I just found out about her a couple of weeks ago when my ex dropped her off with me and ran.”
“You must be Knox Breckenridge.”
I whipped my head toward him, taken aback.
“There was something about it on the town app, appropriately known as the Tattler.”
I nodded. “Right. That. Yeah, I’m Knox.” I reminded myself this was what I’d signed up for when I’d moved to a small town.
I’d been a doubly hot topic for being related to the Henry family and for having Juniper land in my life.
I didn’t spend much time on the app other than to see what the specials were at the restaurants.
“I’m Max Dawson.” He held out a hand, and I shook it.
“Pleasure.”
“This here is Daniel.” Max leaned forward and straightened the blanket on the infant. “He’s my cousin’s son. If you spend any time on the Tattler, you might’ve read that my cousin and his wife died a few months ago. They’d named me as guardian, so I’ve been making the shift from uncle to dad.”
I blew out another breath, finally feeling like my lungs were functioning again. “Damn. I’m sorry for your loss and his.” I nodded toward Daniel. “That’s a tough situation.”
“Yeah. Thanks.” He stared at the baby, seeming lost in memories. “I guess you and I have something in common. Instant parenthood.”
“I guess we do. I’d say we should run together, but I normally go to the gym. I don’t have a jogger for Juniper yet.”
“I go to the gym sometimes, but there’s no childcare this early.”
“Right. I hadn’t thought of that. I have a nanny.”
“I’ve thought about trying to find one. It doesn’t seem like an easy task in a town this small. How’d you find yours?”
“Sheer luck,” I said. “She was a server at Henry’s. Right after I found the baby, I headed to the restaurant because I was late for a meeting. I know, makes zero sense, but I wasn’t thinking straight. Quincy was working and knew what to do with a baby. I had no clue.”
“Quincy. That’s not Quincy Yates, is it?”
“It is. You know her?”
“Everyone knows the Yateses. I teach at the high school. I had her in class my first year of teaching.”
“Oh, yeah?” I did my best to act nonchalant, but my guilty conscience wouldn’t let my brain forget about the naked woman likely still in my bed.
“She’s a great girl. Took care of her younger siblings all the time, from what I understand, so I imagine she’s a damn good nanny.”
“She is. I don’t know what I’d do without her.”
All the more reason not to sleep with her again.
Max checked his watch. “It’s about time for me to head home so I can get ready for work.”
“I need to do the same,” I said, and we both stood.
“Hey, a group of us single dads get together once a week to play darts or pool or watch a game. You should join us Saturday. We’ll be at Chance Cordova’s. Have you met him?”
“He’s the marketing guy for the brewery, right?”
“That’s the guy. His daughter is thirteen.”
I grimaced at the thought of raising a teen girl. “I thought a baby was difficult.”
“Tell me about it.” Max glanced down at Daniel, who was starting to stir. “You want to give me your number, and I can send his address?”
He pulled his phone out, and I rattled off my number. We said goodbye. Then Max took off with Daniel at an impressive pace. I gave my lungs and legs a pep talk and started toward home, thinking this get-together sounded like exactly what I needed. A single dad posse.
Maybe if I made more friends and got out of the house more frequently, I’d have an easier time keeping my mind off my nanny.