24. Sly
Sully
Are you back on US soil yet?
Enzo
He’s been back for the last week, you twit.
Yes, I told you the date I was coming back, Sullivan. I’ve been back for a week, as Enzo says.
Sully
News to me. Why didn’t you call? Or text?
Must I alert you of my presence at all times?
Sully
Is that a legit question?
Nixon
He’s been too busy fucking his new wife into oblivion, Sully. Give the man a break.
Enzo
Makes sense as to why you have yet to visit your mother. I’ve had to hear about her frustrations toward you all week. She’s pissed, you know.
Luciano
Could we not talk about who Sly has been fucking, please? In case you forgot, he married my sister. Why am I getting these messages, anyway?
Sully
I put you in the chat weeks ago, bud. Welcome to the gang.
Enzo
Do not refer to us as a gang. Remove the Paladino.
Luciano
Does my presence in your chat bother you?
Enzo
Your existence bothers me.
Luciano
I’d love for you to say that to my face, Lucchetti.
Sully
I see the nuptials did nothing to ease the disdain.
Nixon
Wow, big words, Sully.
Nixon, did you already head back to California?
Sully
HAS HE NOT TOLD YOU THE NEWS?
Sully
Also are we just ignoring the fact that Luce and Zo are trying to kill each other via text message?
Are either of them consenting to those nicknames?
Nixon
I’ve decided to stick around in New York a while. I’m at the airport now about to catch a flight home, but only to send some of my shit out here. Is it cool if I use your address, Lucchetti?
Enzo
No.
Of course, amico.
Do you have a place to stay when you return?
Sully
No need to be so salty, Zo.
Nixon
I’ll figure it out.
Enzo
Don’t. Call. Me. Zo.
Luciano
While I’m stuck in this hellhole of a group chat, I might as well update you on the St. Jean situation, Sly. Would you prefer I call?
No, tell us all.
Sully
Don’t shut us out, new best friend.
Nixon
Do you have a serious bone in your body, Rochester?
Sully
Not a one.
Luciano
The St. Jeans are pushing to press charges against you, Sly. They want you behind bars for killing their piece of shit son. As of now, the police are shuffling paperwork around, buying time. But the St. Jean’s want to hang you out to dry with a premeditated murder charge.
Enzo
Not gonna happen.
How do you foresee me getting out of this?
Luciano
My father and I are working on it. Don’t worry about it for now.
Sully
See, the Paladinos are putting the feud aside. Lookin’ at you, Zo-Zo.
Nixon
You really do love to poke the bear, don’t you?
Sully
I don’t know about bears, but I love poking women…with my dick. Does that count?
Enzo
This is why no one takes you seriously.
Luciano, is it time for me to get representation?
Luciano
Are there handcuffs around your wrists?
No.
Luciano
Then no. Live life as usual. Take care of my sister. See you at family brunch, brother-in-law.