Chapter 32
Ididn’t realize I had fallen asleep until I open my eyes. With a stretch, I turn onto my back and find that Javier is gone. I wonder if he’s already on his way to the city, and the thought of being here alone for an indefinite amount of time fills me with dread.
Getting up from the bed, I make my way to the Jack and Jill bathroom that connects mine and Javier’s rooms. His door is open, and with just a quick glance, I can tell it’s been emptied of his belongings.
I pull the waist of my sweatpants down and reach into them for my cock, aiming at the bowl.
“Ah, you’re awake.”
Javier’s voice makes me jump, pee hitting the back of the toilet.
“Holy shit,” I exclaim, re-aiming.
He’s next to me, lingering in the doorway as his gaze lowers to watch.
“You mind?”
He grins. “I definitely don’t.”
I look back at the toilet to make sure I’m not making a mess, then my eyes flicker back up at him to find him still engrossed in the action.
“You got any other kinks I should know about?”
He laughs. “Plenty. You’re probably not ready for them.”
I finish up and flush the toilet, moving to the sink. “Does that mean you’ve been holding back on me?”
Javier walks in, coming to a stop at my back, his hands resting on the counter as he traps me between his arms.
Through the reflection, he stares at me.
“Until recently, you hadn’t had sex in years.
I don’t know what teenage experiences you had, but those were teenage boys.
I’m not sure you’re ready for me to unload all of my fantasies, fetishes, and kinks on you.
Most of what I’m into is normal to me, but you might be scandalized. ”
I shut off the water. “You do remember the scourge, right?”
He leans in and kisses my neck. “Oh, that’s right. We should put that to use soon.”
I tilt my head to the side as a sign for him to keep doing it. “So, tell me something you think would scandalize me.”
“There’s nothing specific, carino,” he says, biting down on my flesh.
“I’m just a little rough. Spanking, choking, hair pulling.
I want to see you gag on my cock until tears stream down your face.
I want to edge you until you’re begging me to fuck you.
” His hands slide around my waist, dropping to my cock, massaging it outside my pants.
“There won’t be much I’ll be opposed to. ”
“What if the roles were reversed?” I ask, arching my back and pushing my ass into him. “What if it was you who was gagging? What if I was choking you?”
He grins, his chin resting on my shoulder. “I guess you’ll have to try it out.” He steps back and spanks my ass. “Now, go get packed.”
“What?” I ask, turning around and drying my hands on my pants.
“Pack your stuff. We’re gonna leave soon.”
“I’m going with you?”
He gives me a look like he thinks I’m ridiculous for thinking otherwise. “Of course. I’m not gonna be able to be here, and you’re not staying by yourself.”
“Where will I stay?”
“At my house.”
My brows lift. “Oh.”
“It’s safe and I’ll get to go home to you when I’m not working.”
I nod and he struts toward the door. “I’ll meet you downstairs.”
“Okay.”
As I start gathering my belongings from the bathroom, I try not to dwell on how I’ll get to go home to you made me feel like a jolt of electricity just ran through my body.
After double and triple checking my room and bathroom, I take my suitcase downstairs and find Javier sitting in the accent chair with his ankle resting on his knee, and a cup of coffee in one hand while his other holds his phone.
I think briefly about how domesticated he looks. A regular man drinking coffee while entertaining himself on his phone.
Then he sees me and stands up, his holster already in place, ink crawling down his muscled arms, leading to hands that are responsible for the deaths of many people. No, he’s not a regular man, and I find myself glad that he’s not.
“Ready?” he asks, placing his coffee mug on the table and pocketing his phone.
I start moving, my feet carrying me toward him like they have a mind of their own.
He looks only slightly confused as I get closer without responding to him.
I wrap my arm around his back, pushing him into me as my other hand brushes across his jaw, cradling his face as I lean in to press my lips against his.
What I thought would be a quick peck, transforms when I realize I’m not ready to pull away from him. He puts his hands on my hips, holding me tight, and I part his lips with my tongue, tasting the sweetened coffee flavor inside.
Javier moans into mouth, pulling away to say, “Keep it up and we won’t be able to leave.”
I smile, resting my forehead on his. “Sorry.”
“Never apologize for that.”
Stepping away, I say, “Yes, I’m ready.”
“Okay. Let’s get on the road then.”
An hour into the drive, as I’m staring out the window, I feel Javier’s hand land on my thigh. He gives it a squeeze, and my stomach flips, chest warming. God, he’s already made me a fiend. A simple touch and I’m ready to strip down.
“You okay?” he asks.
“Yeah. Just thinking,” I reply, covering his hand with mine.
“We have to see your dad first.”
And any thought of stripping goes out the window.
“All right,” I say.
“Before we go to my place, we can stop by yours so you can get anything else you might need.”
I perk up a little. “Okay, thanks.”
We’re outside Crest Haven by about forty minutes, but Javier takes a left turn heading east toward the coast.
“I have a question,” I say, cutting into the silence.
“Okay.”
“You told me you went to St. Joseph’s because of a work related thing. Now that I know what work you do, can you tell me the issue that brought you in?”
Javier’s quiet for a few seconds. “I knew I was the reason your dad was getting pushback from people. And,” he pauses, like he’s contemplating telling me something. “Well, Cortez had mentioned in passing that he wouldn’t see the issue if I did join the family.”
“Wha—” I start.
“Hold on,” he says, squeezing my thigh. “It wasn’t a conversation.
He didn’t formally ask me. He was ranting about something someone said, and it felt sort of like a flippant response.
It stuck with me a while, and because I knew that our exclusive working relationship was causing issues, I wondered if maybe this was something I needed to reevaluate.
My proximity to him was bringing in issues he didn’t need, and I was thinking maybe I could do something else.
Plus, I’ve been lying and hiding my whole life, just like you. ”
“But you’ve dated women before, right?”
Javier glances at me. “Well, I don’t date, but yes, since I’m also attracted to women, being seen with them has helped, but it also means I don’t get many opportunities to explore my attraction to men.”
I angle toward him in my seat. “How many men have you actually been with?”
“A few. Mostly when I leave town.”
I nod. “Okay, so, you were feeling torn about working exclusively with my dad?”
“That, and because of the comment he made, I knew it had the potential to grow into a bigger issue.”
“So, you were just seeking guidance?”
He glances over and grins. “I was leaving the store and walking back to my car, saw the church steeple across the street, and thought of my dad and how he would tell me that if Mami wanted to go to church, I was to go with her. He would say, ‘she finds peace there. I don’t have to understand it, but if she wants you to go, go.’”
I smile. “So, you went with your mom?”
“Not always, but yes. I guess at that moment, I wondered if I could also find peace there.”
“I’m not sure I helped you with finding peace.”
He laughs. “That’s not altogether your fault, but I did end up telling Cortez I didn’t have interest in having a bigger role than I already do. I told him I’d leave if it meant calming the storm, but he wouldn’t hear it.”
I nod, but can’t help but dwell on the fact that my dad was willing to make so many changes for him.
He must respect and like Javier as much as Javier respects and likes him.
If he were to not only find out about Javier’s sexual preferences, but also what we’ve been up to, I worry it would ruin their relationship.
I shake my head, choosing to worry about that another time.
“Can I ask what happened to your parents? Or is that—”
“It’s fine,” he replies. “My mom was killed in a car accident. She was on her way to church, and a drunk driver slammed into her.”
“Oh my god,” I whisper. “That’s awful.”
“It’s just another reason I question the existence of an all-good, all-knowing, all-powerful God.
Because she was a church going woman. She did nothing wrong.
She left my father when she found out what he did.
She took care of me and prayed every day.
At meals, at night. She was the best person I’ve known. Why her? Why like that?”
I know he’s not truly asking, and I can feel the pain in his words. A lot of people question their faith in times of tragedies. Nothing I could say would make him feel better, so I keep quiet.
He lets out a huff. “Anyway, that happened when I was thirteen. I was with my father full-time after that, and that’s why I am who I am now.
But, yeah, Dad lived until I was twenty-six.
He was killed by a low level member of the Cattaneo family up near New York.
It wasn’t even work-related. They were both at the same night club, and according to witnesses, my dad stepped between him and some girl he was harassing.
The man was drunk and furious because he felt he was humiliated, and then in the early morning hours, my father was found dead behind the club.
No cameras were running, because it’s a Cattaneo owned business, but we knew who was responsible. ”
“When was that?”
“Six years ago.”
“But you got the guy who did it?”
“Yeah. Your dad took me out there. We didn’t tell anyone. We didn’t have permission. We staked out for several days, waiting and watching, following him around to know his routine. When we knew we could get him away from any witnesses, we acted.”
“I’m sorry.”
He shrugs. “That’s life. You live, you die, and you try to have some fun between the tragedies and heartbreak.”
Javier’s playing it off well, but I can tell he’s affected. I do him a favor and change the subject.
“I feel like I failed as a priest when it came to you.”
He chuckles. “I don’t think any priest would’ve had much luck with me.”
“Not if you would have been as flirtatious and vulgar with them like you were with me.”
The smile he sends me makes my heart thump in my chest. “Is that what I was doing?”
“Don’t act like you don’t know what you were doing.”
“Well,” he says, making a turn before glancing my way with a mischievous grin on his lips. “I have a confession.”
I cock my head. “Oh?”
“Forgive me, Father,” he teases, bringing my hand to his mouth where he plants a kiss on my fingers. “But before my second visit to the church, I looked you up.”
Our connected hands come to a rest back on my thigh. “What?”
He shrugs. “I was curious. I needed to know who I’d be talking to if I went back. I saw your name on one of those brochures, so I looked you up. Found a social media page for the church which had photos and videos.”
“You’re a stalker,” I tease.
“That’s the best thing I could be,” he says with a laugh.
“So, you knew what I looked like.”
“Yes. And I liked what you looked like.”
I bite down on a grin. “You also knew I was a priest, and didn’t know I’d be into guys.”
“What do I care?” he says with a shrug. “I wanted to flirt. I hardly get to with men, and I knew you couldn’t say anything.”
I shake my head, but a smile remains on my lips. “And then you followed me to the bar and surmised I was gay because I didn't look at the women.”
“Pretty much.”
“Well, I guess I should be flattered.”
We turn onto a dirt road in the middle of nowhere, and Javier pulls off onto the side. I look around, trying to figure out where a house could possibly be, but then he’s tugging on my shirt, pulling me closer to him.
“Oh,” I manage to get out before his lips collide into mine, his tongue sweeping into my mouth with a desperate need.
He holds the side of my face, kissing me passionately and robbing me of breath and senses. I reach for him, hating the seatbelt that’s keeping me restricted. I touch his chest and then his thigh. My palm skates over his crotch and he moans into my mouth.
Javier pulls away first, then comes in for another quick peck.
“Had to do that. We’re almost there and I needed it out of my system.”
I touch my lips. “I think I need to get more out of my system.”
He grins. “Later. At home.”
My teeth sink into my bottom lip at the promise. “Okay.”
We get ourselves together and then he pulls back onto the road.
We travel almost two miles until he makes a turn that leads to a large house.
Before we can get to the driveway, we come up to a sturdy, metal gate.
He gets out and unlocks it, pulling one panel open so we can drive through.
Once we’re in, he closes and locks it back up.
The house sits far back on the property, giving whoever’s inside enough time to see if anyone ever comes through the gate, and to prepare as needed.
When we get closer, I see several cars, and lots of powerful, scary-looking men. These guys are definitely in the family, and based on their expensive apparel, they’re more than soldiers.
Javier glances at me. “He’s having a meeting with his top guys. He wants to introduce you.”
“Oh, God.”