Julia
JULIA
T here are pink macarons and crystal chandeliers everywhere I look.
I love this place. It’s a tiny shop and the treats are far too expensive for what they are, but it’s the vibe I truly love.
I scoot my silver stool closer to the small round table and unpeel the wrapper on my cupcake as I listen to Suzette.
“I want to know every detail,” she says with barely contained joy.
Kat glances between the two of us and so far, she hasn’t touched a thing on the etched tray in the center of the table.
I know there’s something there that would make her smile, but she’s not interested.
I bet she and her husband had another fight.
I wish they wouldn’t; they love each other.
It’s been obvious to me since the day she met him.
Clearing my throat, I avoid replying to Sue’s comment.
I can feel both sets of their eyes on me, but I don’t look up.
It’s too pretty in here to feel this anxious.
My eyes settle on the crystal flute of pink champagne and I take a quick sip, tilting my head up to gaze at the carved tin ceiling.
Everything in here is pink, silver, shiny and new.
So beautiful to look at, but useless in saving me from this conversation.
“How could you not tell us?” Kat’s voice is low but not scolding, more surprised than anything.
She’s still standing with her purse on a stool and I don’t think she has any intention of sitting down in the least. Until she does, plopping down with her eyes boring into me.
“I want to know who you’re seeing,” she adds with a pout.
The disappointment in her voice makes my appetite for all things sweet and scrumptious vanish. I knew this was coming. You can’t just take off from Katerina Thompson and not have her chew you out later.
“It wasn’t meant as an insult,” I start to tell her. It’s not like I was trying to upset her, she should at least know that for a fact.
“It’s because you would have stopped her,” Sue interjects before shoving a tiny cupcake into her mouth and biting it right down the middle. She has no shame and gives Kat the answer as if it’s obvious. Which it is. If I’m an overthinker, Kat is a second-guesser.
“Of course I would have stopped her.” Her wrath is directed at Sue now and to be honest, I’m grateful. Sue can handle it. She stares Kat right in the eye as she pushes the other half of the cupcake into her mouth with her pointer finger.
Kat justifies her stance. “She was drunk and how many one-night stands have we regretted right after?” She has a point, I’ll give her that.
“It’s not that I was keeping it from you,” I say. There’s a small plea in my voice for Kat to calm down. “I was …”
“You were keeping it from me,” Kat says, finishing my sentence for me.
“Only until it was over,” I say as my face scrunches with guilt and I hide behind my drink.
“Oh hush,” Sue says easily and then nods at me. “Good for you for going out and dusting off those cobwebs.” I snort a small laugh and my shoulders shake from it. “He’s cute too.”
“He’d better be,” Kat says beneath her breath, pulling out a bottle of water from her oversized leather hobo bag.
Sue rolls her eyes and says, “You going to track him down and beat the crap out of him if he isn’t?
” A smile forces its way onto my face and I try to make it go away, but it’s not happening.
Kat side-eyes Sue for a moment before returning to her water and taking a sip.
With that, the tension vanishes. Kat gets why I didn’t tell her, I know she does.
And I get why she’s upset. It’s a simple squabble that’s over the moment Kat reaches for her own cupcake.
“So, your first one-night stand. How does it feel?” Sue asks.
I could write a whole book on the effects I’m feeling right now.
The guilt, the anxiety. But the other things, the bit of liveliness and …
is it pride? Is that what it is? Knowing that I was wanted and desired like that by a man like Mason.
And that he still wants me. Yeah, that’s a bit of pride, which is odd to be feeling over this.
“He texted me this morning.” I sway a little in my seat, picking at the hem of the tablecloth. “He wants to go out tonight.”
Sue’s eyes go wide. “Really?” She grins in slow motion and then makes a face as she wipes her fingertips on her napkin.
“What’s that for?” I ask her.
Sue shrugs and says, “Nothing.”
“That’s not a nothing look,” I tell her right back. “That’s a something look.”
Kat reaches for another cupcake, listening intently.
“You must’ve been good.” Sue pops a piece of macaron into her mouth all the while smiling. The tiered tray was filled with an assortment of sugary treats when Sue arrived, but it’s almost empty now except for the large cupcakes.
My mouth opens some and I have to force it back shut. By the heat on my cheeks, I imagine I’m beet red. Yeah, it’s definitely pride.
“So, what’d you tell him?” Kat says. “Don’t worry, I won’t try to stop you,” she adds with an asymmetric smile.
I’m embarrassed that I first told him I was busy and then suggested the exact time and location he said originally when he told me it was my call, so I just cut to the chase. “I said yes.”
“You said yes to a date for tonight that was asked today?” Kat asks with a raised brow. Yup, she’s just like me.
“I did,” I answer slowly as Sue claps her hands and leans her head back with laughter. She’s so loud that a few customers in line at the counter look back at her.
“I love her. This is just too good to be true.” Sue’s smile just gets bigger and bigger until she spots the last tiny cupcake.
“I know how it sounds but I told him no at first, and then he said he was available whenever I was ready.”
“So then you said yes.” Kat nods her head and I nod in return. I can see the wheels spinning.
“I want to go out and see him again. It’s that simple.”
Kat hums, her eyes narrowing like she’s thinking far too hard, biting her tongue, or both. She finally settles on her response, asking, “So you like him?”
She’s awarded another nod from me as I say, “I do. At least I like the way he makes me feel.”
There’s another hum from her and Sue shakes her head, opting to finish her drink rather than contribute to the conversation.
“You have fun tonight,” Sue says with a wink. I give her a small smile back and kiss her cheek before she leaves us so she can get to her meeting on time.
Maddie’s not coming to this little cupcake brunch so it’s just me and Kat now. I don’t like the feeling that I need armor to have a quick chat with one of my closest friends. I bite the inside of my cheek as I watch Sue leave, the bells hanging above the door ringing as I shift on the stool.
“Kat, look?—”
“Nope,” she says and holds up her hand. “It’s fine.
Last night was fine. Tonight is fine.” Her eyes are closed as she speaks.
She nods her head as if she’s convincing herself, moving the purse from on top of her stool to the one Sue was sitting on.
She has to shift in her seat to tug down her black pencil skirt.
Her white blouse is nearly see through, but she still resembles the epitome of professionalism.
She’s always put together and on top of everything.
“I know last night isn’t something you would do,” I start to say and Kat nods slightly. “I know it upset you for me to leave and not tell you.” I lean forward, putting my hand on the table, closer to her.
“I think I overreacted,” Kat blurts out before I can say anything else.
She doesn’t meet my gaze at first, but then she lifts her eyes to mine.
“It really is okay, all of it, and I’m not trying to make you feel bad.
” Her words come out with sincerity and it surprises me how much I needed that.
“Or slut-shame you or anything like that. I’m happy that you’re happy.
I’m just nervous that he’s taking advantage of you, or that you’re going to get hurt …
” I brace for what I know is coming as she lowers her voice and says, “You know, so soon after everything.”
“I know. Thank you.” My voice cracks some and I look for my glass, but then find it empty. I run my fingertips down the stem, feeling overwhelmed again with a mix of emotions.
Guilt comes out to play more than the rest. It’s not her making me feel guilty. It’s the thought that I should still be mourning.
“Am I a bad person?” I ask Kat, finally pulling my eyes from the empty flute to her.
“No,” she answers with sad eyes, taking my hand in both of hers. “I didn’t mean to make you think that?—”
“You didn’t,” I say and wave her off the path she’s going down. “I was just thinking this morning … about …” About Jace. I don’t say it out loud.
“Just tell me that he’s not going to make you miss your deadline.” Kat deflects, sidestepping this conversation and creating an out for me. God, I love her. She’s my editor and this manuscript is due in two weeks.
A smile grows on my face, but it’s not genuine in the least. Not because of Kat or Mason or any of that.
It’s the use of the word deadline . I know for a fact I’m going to miss that deadline.
She doesn’t need to know that, though. “He won’t get in the way of that.
” I shake my head cheerfully, my hair swishing against my shoulders.
“Okay then,” she says as she raises her brows and finally picks up a cupcake.
Not the small ones from the tray of random sweets, nope, Kat goes for the largest cupcake with hot pink icing and an Oreo stuck in the center.
“Please tell me you’re at least using condoms until you get back on the pill or something. ”
I know she meant for that to be funny, but when I give her a side-eye and a shrug, she practically chokes on that Oreo.