Chapter 28
Rani
I sat there fuming, watching Ezra storm off like our argument wasn’t even worth the time to work it out.
Men were so stupid. Why the hell did he think rejecting me was protecting me?
Where was the logic? Was it in the room with me?
No, it fucking wasn’t. I felt him close off before he left.
More brilliant logic. Because it made no sense to have your emotions available for someone to try and understand.
His wall wasn’t infallible, though. There were thousands of cracks through it, like he didn’t really want to put it down. Or wasn’t focused enough to make it solid. Maybe I’d more than pissed him off. That was hurt leaking through in a messy puddle. Fuck. I was too harsh with him.
I slid off the mattress and paced over the small rug between the bed and the old dresser.
Made of some type of ancient wood, you could tell it was well taken care of, like the rest of the cottage.
I saw the way Ezra’s eyes flashed when he dared me to take a closer look around.
He thought the lack of amenities and fresh paint would change my opinion on this life.
It didn’t. And it was insulting that he thought it would.
That’s part of why his rejection stung a bit…
okay, a lot . I knew he came from a good place, and that it was his own insecurities, his own internalized shame that sent him into a panic.
He couldn’t see the charm of his own home.
Every corner, every piece of furniture, every fucking blooming flower and vine that wound through the wide-open windows were a reflection of him.
The studious and devoted mahogany and oaks, the chaotic mismatching pillows everywhere ; even the greenery told of how life flourished around him.
He was blind to it all. But I wasn’t. I felt at home here, as much as I did in the hayloft of my family’s barn or sitting in a deep tub of saltwater.
It was him . He was where I felt the most at home was with him.
And now he wanted to take that away from me without even asking how I felt about it.
Ezra thought he was protecting me, blah blah.
I refused to accept it. His fears were based on his treatment and experiences, but it wouldn’t always be like that.
Kai and Eryn would be in charge one day, and if the djinn really did become allies, the future would look completely different.
He just had to see it. He had to want to fight long enough and take the risks worth taking.
But even if mindsets never changed, I would proudly stand beside Ezra and tell all the haters to get fucked.
Shit, I would do that right now and rabidly scream it at the top of my lungs directly in the faces of his aunt and those demonic twin siblings of his.
I stopped my pacing as determination surged through my veins like a charged bullet.
No one had ever fought for Ezra, not really.
His father built him this cottage, but put it out of sight.
Even Kai didn’t open his mouth and tell his mother to fuck off like he should have.
Every single person in Ezra’s life used him and thought that by not ignoring him, they were different than the rest.
I called bullshit on all of that.
They allowed him to stain his hands red, slice his soul to ribbons, and fill his mind with shadows all in the name of duty.
They created the monster he now saw, the one he feared would endanger me, but it didn’t bother me one bit.
I would show him the truth of who he really was, and if that meant drawing out the darkness that hid inside him, then so be it. It would get along great with mine.
Now to get him back here. Determined, I hatched a detailed plan to win my bond. It required a little acting, a white lie, and less clothing, but if I could pull it off, Ezra would be mine by morning.
Ezra
Stupid, stupid, stupid.
My legs ate up the rough terrain as I raced back to the cottage.
Stupid to not take your truck. Stupid to leave in the first place. You’re a fucking idiot.
Hurt and frustration swirled inside me, battling for dominance, but it was all pushed to the side to make room for panic and pure, unfiltered terror.
My phone remained clenched in my fist as I ran.
I contemplated chucking it, thinking somehow that would help me run faster, but I didn’t want to risk missing another call from Eryn.
I was halfway to my cousin’s wing of the manor with a plan to sneak inside and crash there for the night, when Eryn called me and screeched down the line that Rani had been attacked.
Why didn’t Rani call? Was she okay? Had she been on the phone with Eryn during the attack?
What if she wasn’t at the cottage when I got there?
I put on an extra burst of speed and prayed my last thought was wrong.
I wasn’t sure how the djinn got past my wards, but I would never forgive myself if something happened to Rani because of my never-ending string of failures.
Breaths like knives in my chest, I made it home and tore up the drive with a renewed flood of strength.
The front door was wide open. Strange, because it was the only entry to the cottage we actually kept closed.
My sneakers crunched over gravel as I crept closer.
No signs of damage or forced entry. No sounds of a scuffle inside.
Everything was in order, down to the whir of the ceiling fan and serenade of evening crickets.
As I eased through the front entry, I ripped down that wall through our bond and felt for Rani.
The silence was alarming. I almost expected fear or panic or pain; to sense nothing meant my imagination was making up all kinds of horrendous reasons for why I couldn’t feel the girl who was usually terrible at containing her emotions.
Impulse wanted me to run to the bedroom, where I last saw her, but training won out and I cleared each room before heading down the tiny hall in the back.
Each second was counted with a pounding heart and another attempt at reaching Rani through our fledgling bond.
The one I just finished telling myself, and her, that I wanted to smother for her protection.
Oh, the irony.
I could see all the way across the bedroom from the turn in the hall, and the first thing I noticed were the wide-open French doors.
Not unusual; I didn’t even think they could close anymore.
Definitely the first safety hazard I was going to fix.
Moonlight shone through the open space between flowering foliage and gauzy curtains.
I walked all the way inside, head on a swivel, but it wasn’t until I reached the bed that I heard the creak of the bedroom door slowly closing behind me.
I spun on my heel, heart lodged in my throat as I met a burning pair of storm-gray eyes, hidden in the corner. Rani stood with a coy smile, in nothing but a set of ice blue lingerie. The lace played peek-a-boo with all my favorite parts, accentuating her full breasts and those sinfully long legs.
Her skin glowed; pulsing like a beacon calling me home.
“I didn’t think I’d have to resort to drastic measures to get you to bond with me,” she said, eyes slightly narrowed. “It kind of hurts.”
I gulped, but there was no looking away. Not from her. This was a priceless work of art standing before me, and here I was, acting like an inexperienced loser who couldn’t get it together. I willed my mouth to unglue and had no control over the words that tumbled out.
“It’s because I care.” She knew what I was talking about.
My rejection. The reason I ran like an idiot, leaving her unprotected.
I didn’t deserve the relief that coursed through me as I realized this was all an elaborate trap to get my head out of my ass.
She shouldn’t have to resort to theatrics for me to have a mature conversation with her, but I wasn’t going to deny my eyes the chance to bask in her beauty.
She took a step forward with a nod. “That’s the only reason I forgave you.”
I gave her a shaky smile as I struggled to speak, to find the right words to thank her. I didn’t deserve her understanding either.
“It’s not forever,” I finally managed to say. “I just need time to fix myself. To be worthy of you. I need to find a way to destroy the monster and wash all this blood off my hands.”
Her lips pinched together in a glare, and the spicy punch of her irritation slammed into me hard enough to make me clutch my chest.
“Don’t you dare let their exigencies define you,” she thundered, teeth bared. “You’re not a monster just because they demanded you be one.”
“You don’t get it; I’m defining myself.” She drew back, surprised, and a bitter laugh bubbled out of my throat.
It sounded hollow even to my own ears. “I actually like the rush of power. I thrive on the knowledge that I’m the one eliminating the danger and keeping those I love safe.
” I pushed off the bed and moved in, closing the distance between us as I laid out all the ways I was a depraved monstrosity.
“I’m good at what I do, and that brings its own type of pleasure.
Snapping bones, smothering screams; they’re music to my ears. ”
She shook her head at every sickening truth I revealed.
She thought I was a monster because I was made into one—and that was partially true, I could admit—but I remained a monster because I enjoyed it.
She refused to cower at my approach, and instead drew herself to her full height and met my stare with a bright flare of defiance.
“Have you ever tortured someone innocent? Ever killed someone who hasn’t struck out or attacked first?”
The very idea shook me from my attempt at intimidation. I wasn’t a psycho . “No.”
“Then shut the fuck up.”