Chapter 16
Noah eased the heavy door open. The quiet was so eerie that cold bumps the size of fire-ant hills rose up on Tertia’s arms. Higgins jumped down from Ophelia’s lap and stuck his nose out of the room, cocked his head to one side, then walked out into the kitchen with his tail high.
“The cat has spoken. The storm has passed,” Noah said. “We can go see if anything else has been dropped in the yard other than the bull that’s in my truck.”
Tertia followed him out. “We can be glad that tornado season will be over when your café is built.”
“Our café,” he reminded her.
“Hey,” Jake raised his voice. “You want me to bring Rocky out?”
“Yes, please,” Noah yelled back. “Just set the cage on the dining room table. So far, so good. I’ve still got a house.” He opened the front door. “But the porch roof is gone along with the posts, and so is the bull. I guess he was just visiting.”
“Or maybe he heard Rocky whistling, and he doesn’t like country music.” Tertia wished she could put the words back in her mouth. “I’m sorry. That was too soon.”
“No, it was not,” Noah said. “I need something to make me smile. I’m lucky that anything is standing at all, and that the storm didn’t take my truck along with the bull. The porch can be rebuilt.”
“My daddy can help with that,” Tertia said. “He’ll be so glad that Ophelia and I survived the storm that he will be glad to fix your porch. He’s amazing when it comes to construction.”
“That would be great, but I don’t expect any repayment for getting all of us to safety,” Noah said. “Right now, I should probably take y’all home. When daylight comes, I’ll help get your truck up out of that ditch, Jake.”
“Thanks…again,” Jake said.
“No problem. Do you have another vehicle to use?” Noah asked.
“Got an old work truck that we use out in the vineyard,” he answered. “I just hope there’s grape arbors left standing.”
Tertia stepped out onto the concrete porch and looked up to see stars and the quarter moon in the sky. The storm had passed, left damage behind, and evidently jumped the river into Oklahoma. “If debris wasn’t strewn all over the yard, I’d think this fresh air was simply coming off a summer rain.”
“I hope those three funnels didn’t tear up the Paradise,” Ophelia said.
“Or worse yet, the barn. Luna will cry if that fancy gazebo Daddy is building for her wedding is destroyed.” Tertia took a deep breath of the cool air. Then she stepped off the porch onto the soggy lawn and opened the truck door on the passenger side. “How can everything be so calm after what just happened?”
“Mother Nature has a wicked sense of humor,” Ophelia answered as she got into the vehicle right behind her sister. “Noah, you really don’t have to take us home. Tertia and I could walk from here.”
Noah shook his head. “I wouldn’t garner many points with Miz Bernie if I let you walk home barefoot, and besides, there’s no telling what’s lying around out there that you could get hurt on just walking down the lane and across the road.”
“What makes you think…?” Tertia started.
“I’m not blind, even though you did try to knock one of my eyes out when we were kids.” Noah chuckled. “It didn’t take a brainiac to be able to read her expression when I picked you up this evening. I hope I get some points when she finds out Tertia and I rescued you this evening.”
“We can only hope, and I did not try to blind you. I just aimed at the biggest part of you, and back then that was your head since that held your ego,” Tertia told him.
“Bernie likes me, but like I said before, I’ve got to win over Pepper,” Jake said as he slid in beside Ophelia.
Noah got into the truck and started the engine. “I’d be glad for any help you might give me.”
“Same here,” Jake said.
Noah backed the vehicle up and then started driving down the lane, only to brake when he was about halfway to the road. “Looks like one of Remy’s cows got loose or got…” He paused.
“That’s not a real bull,” Jake said. “That’s the one that was in the back of your truck earlier.”
“Well, we aren’t going anywhere until we move him.” Noah turned off the engine.
All four doors opened, and they eased out of the vehicle onto wet ground.
“Hey, we can do this,” Jake said. “You ladies can stay in the truck.”
“That feller looks heavy, so we’ll help,” Tertia told him.
“Or we can walk across the road and down the lane and Jake can crash here,” Ophelia added.
“Nobody is walking anywhere,” Noah declared. “That big bruiser can’t be all that heavy. After all, he flew through the air like a big old marshmallow.”
The bull’s feet were planted in mud four inches up on his legs. Jake and Noah tried to push him out of the way, but he didn’t budge. Ophelia and Tertia got in between the two men and pushed hard, but the bull stood his ground.
“What’s that thing made of?” Ophelia gasped.
“Well, it dang sure ain’t marshmallows,” Tertia huffed.
“Metal of some kind,” Jake answered breathlessly.
“We’re not moving him this way,” Noah finally conceded after they had tried several times.
Tertia bent forward and put her hands on her knees. “He’s as stubborn as Aunt Bernie.”
“Yep,” Ophelia agreed. “What are we going to do with him or with her?”
“Y’all will have to figure out what to do with Bernie, but I’ve got an idea for the bull,” Noah answered. “I’m going to attach a chain to him and use the truck to pull him out of the way. If he survives the move, I’ll find the café that he left behind and tell them they can come take the critter home.”
Noah jogged back toward the house, circled around behind it and came back with a long length of chain. He got inside the vehicle, put it in reverse, and then turned it around. Then he and Jake looped one end around the bull’s horns and attached the other end to the truck.
Jake stood to one side and motioned for Noah to go forward until the chain was tight, and then held up a fist and raised his voice. “We’ll push while you pull.”
Noah gave him a thumbs-up and eased forward, but the bull didn’t move. Jake made a motion for him to go faster. The truck tires spun in the mud, but the bull still didn’t budge.
“This puts a whole new meaning to the word bullheaded, doesn’t it?” Ophelia panted.
“One more time?” Noah yelled out the still open door.
“Yes,” all three of them hollered back.
He gunned the engine, and the tires finally got some traction. The bull let go, but it seemed like he was a real animal and didn’t appreciate his horns being chained. As if he was trying to shake the chains off his horns, he weaved back and forth from one side of the lane to the other, and then came to rest in the middle of Noah’s front yard.
“We did it!” Jake said.
“You did it,” Ophelia said.
“Couldn’t have…” Jake started and then stopped talking.
“A hand please,” Ophelia said from a facedown position in the mud.
“I’m so sorry,” Jake apologized and extended a hand toward her. “When it let go, I ran along behind it. I didn’t know that you’d fallen.”
The mud made a sucking sound when Ophelia and Tertia sat up. Ophelia put her hand in Jake’s and tried to stand up, but she slipped and pulled him down with her.
Tertia managed to get up on her own, but when Noah ran over to her, his feet went out from under him, and he sat down hard. Tertia landed in his lap and wiped her hands on his shirt. “I would sure appreciate a good hard summer rain right now.”
“I hope this is the end of bad luck.” Jake rolled away from Ophelia and got to his feet. “Let’s try this again.”
Tertia pushed away from Noah and stood up. “I want a long bath and a warm bed after all this.”
“What happened?” Noah asked as he managed to get up on the second try.
“We pushed, and the bull danced across the lane,” Jake said, “and both of these ladies decided to try a mud bath to finish off our evening. You know the rest of the story.”
Tertia looked down at her clothing. “I’m just glad you’ve got leather seats.”
“Are you sure you want us…?” Ophelia started.
“Yes, I’m sure,” Noah answered before she could finish and pointed at his vehicle. “I was planning to have it detailed this week anyway. Climb in and we’ll have you home in a few minutes.”
Yeah, right,Ophelia thought, but she didn’t say it out loud. Murphy’s Law stated that if something could go wrong, it would—and they weren’t home yet.
“Less than five minutes,” Tertia whispered as they slogged through the mud to the vehicle and got inside.
“Don’t count your chickens before they are hatched,” Ophelia replied. “If Mama or Ursula were writing what we’ve gone through tonight in one of their romance books, their editors would say that it was too much.”
“The truth is stranger than fiction, right?” Tertia asked.
“Oh, yeah,” Noah agreed.
He drove the rest of the distance down the lane and across the road. Pecan tree limbs were tossed about, but nothing that the truck couldn’t drive over—until they got to the last tree in the row. Noah braked hard and brought the vehicle to a long, sliding stop not six inches from the huge tree that had been uprooted and was blocking any vehicles going to or from the Paradise.
“The chickens ain’t hatched yet,” Tertia groaned.
“Where’s a chicken?” Jake asked.
“I jinxed us when I said that we were only five minutes from home,” Tertia admitted.
“And I told her not to count her chickens before they were hatched,” Ophelia added. “But we’re only a little way from the house, and I will watch where I step. We can crawl over the tree trunk and walk the rest of the way. Thanks for getting us this far, Noah.”
“Us guys aren’t going to leave you until you are safely inside the house.” Jake got out of the truck for what seemed to Ophelia like the hundredth time and rounded the back end to open the door for Ophelia. “Guess the last obstacle in this horrible date is that we have to…”
“Shhh…” Ophelia put her hand in his and hopped down to the ground. She didn’t even look over her shoulder at the mess she and Tertia were leaving in the back seat, but just headed toward the tree. “It’s still a few yards to the house. And Mama says that in her books, the hero and heroine do not take a picnic to the river, sit down under a willow tree, and fall in love. They have to work for a happy-ever-after.”
“But we didn’t have a picnic or a willow tree, and we’ve had plenty of obstacles. Does that mean there’s a happy-ever-after in our future?” Jake put his hands on her waist and lifted her over to the other side.
Noah followed his lead and did the same thing with Tertia. “I will call it a happy-ever-after if Tertia will agree to work with me when we open the café.”
“I thought you didn’t like blond-haired men,” Ophelia said in a low voice while the two guys were climbing over the tree trunk.
“I didn’t,” Tertia replied, “but a woman has the prerogative to change her mind.”
“He seems really nice,” Ophelia said.
Both guys had joined them before Tertia could say another word. Ophelia was surprised that one or both of them didn’t fall and break a bone, or at least turn an ankle. After all, Murphy’s Law had done a fantastic job that whole evening.
“Good lord, what happened to y’all?” Endora gasped when they came through the door. “Did you get caught in the middle of that tornado?”
“Kind of,” Ophelia answered.
Mary Jane came out of the living room and pointed at her daughters. “You two get on upstairs and get cleaned up,” she said. “I didn’t know you were going to do mud wrestling.”
“Neither did I. Are you sure that you are even Ophelia and Tertia, or are you a couple of vagabonds?” Luna asked.
“We’re sure,” Ophelia answered and turned to face Jake. He didn’t look as bad as she did, but he wouldn’t win the audition for a men’s soap commercial. His boots sloshed with every step and his whole backside was a muddy mess. Noah hadn’t fared much better. Little mud balls hung on strands of his blond hair and his formerly white shoes were now brown and very wet.
“There’s a tree over the road on this end of your lane,” Noah said. “If any of y’all need to get out of here tonight, I’ll be glad to give you a ride. You might need to bring a couple of towels for the back seat since they’re both pretty muddy.”
Remy came out of the living room with Ursula at his side. “Thank you and yes. That would beat us having to climb over the fence and walk home across the pasture.”
“Us, too,” Shane answered. “We drove Luna’s vehicle over here when the sirens went off, so if we can just get home, I’ll bring my truck back tomorrow morning to help get the tree cut up and moved.”
“Okay then,” Joe Clay nodded. “Noah will take everyone home, probably one group at a time, and then whoever isn’t working tomorrow will meet back here to clear the path. And I appreciate all of you guys offering to help.”
Bernie joined them from the living room and frowned at Noah. “Dolly just called to check in and said there is no church tomorrow. There’s a tree blown over the doors, and all kinds of debris in the parking lot.”
“I’m free to help most of this week,” Noah offered. “When we get your place cleaned up, Joe Clay, we should go help take care of the church. We’ve all got trucks to haul the wood away, or folks who have fireplaces might even come and get it.”
“Noah’s porch is gone,” Tertia blurted out. “I told him you could help, Daddy, since he kept us all from getting blown away.”
“Then we’ll help get that put to rights after we clean up our place and the church,” Joe Clay said. “Now, you girls go upstairs and clean up. We’re going to make a pot of coffee to share with these guys when they get back from taking everyone home.”
“No argument here.” Ophelia glanced over at Jake. “I’ll see you in a little bit. Oh, and Daddy, Jake’s truck is sitting in a ditch with a flat tire. Y’all might help him drag it out and take it to the winery.”
“And thanks for the offer of coffee, but we aren’t fit to stay,” Jake said. “We’ll get these folks home, and then get on to our own places to get a shower.”
Bernie laid a hand over her heart. “What happened to all of you? I want the truth, but not until y’all look like human beings again.”
“Yes, ma’am.” Tertia nodded.
“But you aren’t going to believe all of it could happen in one evening,” Ophelia threw over her shoulder and led the way upstairs.
“If we go home now, we won’t get to hear the story,” Luna said.
Tertia stopped on the first step and turned around. “We’ll tell it again tomorrow.”
“I’m not waiting until tomorrow,” Endora declared. “I’ll make hot chocolate and get out the peanut butter cookies. Y’all don’t take forever in the shower.”
“While you do that, I’m going to wander around outside for a few minutes and see if there’s roof damage on the Paradise or if there’s anything ruined out in the barn,” Joe Clay said.
Luna and Shane were halfway out the door, but Luna turned back around. “Daddy, take pictures, so I’ll know that my gazebo is still standing. I won’t be able to sleep if you don’t.”
“I promise I will, darlin’.” Joe Clay followed them out.
“Do you think Aunt Bernie will be nice now that Noah is offering to help so much?” Tertia asked when they reached the top of the stairs and were walking down the hallway toward the bathroom.
“Maybe after we tell her the whole story,” Ophelia replied as she peeled off her muddy dress, stopped by her room, and put it in the dirty clothes basket. “If that comes clean, I doubt I will ever wear it again.”
“It’s a bad-luck dress, isn’t it? Just like this shirt and jeans I’m wearing.” Tertia had already removed her muddy shirt and jeans and was headed toward the bathroom with them in her hands. “I’ve got dibs on the bathtub first.”
“You’ve got dibs on the shower,” Ophelia snapped. “There’s no way I’m waiting an hour to get this washed off my body. If this is what a mud bath feels like, I never want to do one. Besides, do you want to sit in brown water when this mud washes off us?”
“You got a point there,” Tertia agreed. “I hope we don’t stop up the plumbing.”
“Shhh…” Ophelia shushed her. “After tonight that could happen.”
While Tertia took a shower, Ophelia did what she could at the bathroom sink. Her sink had never had so much dirt washed down it in all the years that she lived in the house before moving out to join the air force. When she looked at her reflection, even after cleaning up as much as she could, she wondered if Jake Brennan would ever ask her out again.
“If he doesn’t, I’ll just have to take the initiative and ask him,” she muttered, “but if the second date is anything like this, I’m going to tell Aunt Bernie that she was dead wrong about him being the one.”
Tertia got out of the shower and wrapped a towel around her body and another one around her wet hair. “I’ve never appreciated being clean so much in my entire life.”
Ophelia reached inside the shower curtain and adjusted the water. “If Noah asks you out on a real date, would you go with him?”
“I’m not sure,” Tertia answered and disappeared into the hallway.
Ophelia’s curly hair was matted with mud, so it took her a little longer than usual to get it all washed out. She shampooed, conditioned, and repeated the whole process a second time before she finally felt that she had gotten her hair clean. There was mud under her fingernails, in her ears and even caked between her breasts. She lathered up three times before the water running down the drain was clear. Then she stepped out and wrapped herself in one towel and put another one around her head turban style.
She went to her bedroom and pulled on clean underwear, a pair of dark-green sweatpants, and an air force T-shirt. She took time to towel dry her hair and pull it up in a wet ponytail. When she finally made it down to the kitchen, everyone was gathered around the dining room table, including Tertia.
“Okay, we’re all here now,” Mary Jane said. “Ophelia, start at the beginning and tell us what happened.”
“Why does she go first?” Tertia asked.
“Because she’s older than you,” Endora answered but she stared right at Bernie. “But before you start, I want y’all all to know that I was really scared tonight, but I’m using the experience to write a story about how our cats and Pepper learned to be nice to each other during a big storm.”
“Yes, they did, and I am proud of Pepper.” Bernie shot a dirty look across the table at Endora.
“Okay.” Ophelia sat down in the empty chair beside Jake. “Here goes. The rain hit about the time we got to Nocona…” She went on to tell her story up to the point when she and Jake were stranded in the ditch.
“My turn,” Tertia said, and she finished up from that time, telling all about how the bull had flown through the air and was now standing in Noah’s front yard. She embellished the rest of the tale with a good deal of exaggeration all the way until they had to jump over a tree that made those in Redwood National Park look like toothpicks. Even Aunt Bernie was giggling when she finished talking.
“Now, can either Mama or Ursula use all that in one of your romance books?” Ophelia asked.
Ursula shook her head. “No one would believe all that could happen in one evening, not even in a whole fiction book.”