Chapter 33 Drew
Drew
Drew woke up to the sight of the early-morning light pouring through a gap in the curtain and the sensation of Ari’s breath against his chest. She was fast asleep and looked more peaceful than he’d ever seen her.
A ray of sunlight landed on the side of her face, coating her skin with a soft, golden glow and bringing out all the shades of brown in her hair.
They were both wrapped up in a thick, white wintery duvet, and although Drew’s eyes were still relaxed enough to let him go back to sleep, the sight of her made him feel wide awake.
Ari, he thought, sounding out the letters of her name in his head.
It felt like liquid gold. Every part of her did.
The sound of her laugh. The way her presence lit up a room.
The look she gave him when she was trying to figure him out.
Looking down at her peaceful, sleeping face, he could imagine that in a world in which they had more time, it would be pretty easy to fall in love with her.
The thought should have startled him, but it came so immediately and without question that he knew there was no point in fighting it.
His life was too much of a mess for her, and he knew she was too bright to let herself pretend that this thing between them could be anything more than just a moment.
It was a winter romance that seemed magical under the moonlight but wouldn’t make sense once spring began and the impossibilities of a relationship were exposed to the light.
But that didn’t stop him from wondering what life would look like if they were going home to the same city.
He absentmindedly ran his finger over her cheek, tracing the shadows that a distant tree left on her skin as the early-morning light shone in.
“Are you watching me sleep, Drew?” she said softly, her eyes still closed. Her voice was sweet in the morning, soft and gentle.
“I didn’t want to wake you up,” he said softly as he watched her eyes open.
Her head was still comfortably tucked between his shoulder and chest. He wondered how long they could stay like that, how much longer they could live in the moment before it had to end.
He got his answer when Ari’s alarm began to ring.
Upon hearing it, she opened her eyes, left his embrace, and sat up. His chest felt much colder without her.
“Is that your alarm to go to training?” he asked as she rolled over to the bedside table to turn it off.
“No,” she said, wearing an embarrassed smile. It was cute, he wanted to kiss it.
“What is it?” he asked, smiling back at her, amused by her refusal to make eye contact with him then.
“Don’t judge me,” she said.
“I would never,” he said as she shuffled to his side of the bed. He stretched his arm out, an open invitation, and she rolled back over to him, getting comfortable in the space between his shoulder and chest that felt like it had been created just for her.
She looked up at him and smiled.
“I get up every morning at six a.m. to take a walk and listen to a self-help book. But not in a listening to Rich Dad Poor Dad and The Law of Attraction kind of way,” she insisted.
“I’d still like you if you listened to Rich Dad Poor Dad every morning,” he said.
“It’s sports biographies to help me become a good captain.
It’s corny, but I’m trying to be the best I can for the team, you know?
” she said, her eyes wide and earnest. How she looked when she started talking about the things she loved made his heart swell.
As she explained what she was reading, that early-morning thought came back to him.
And this time, he was certain. Drew could definitely imagine himself falling in love with Ari one day.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” she whispered suspiciously.
“You know why,” he said.
“I’m going to need you to spell it out.” She smiled.
“Because I like you,” he said plainly. Her eyes lit up as she looked over at him.
“I think I like you, too,” she said with a small smile.
“But? There’s always a but,” he said, sensing her hesitance but trying to keep it light.
“There’s no but. This is all that matters right now,” she said, resting her head on his chest. The two of them lay in bed and looked up at the ceiling in quiet contentment.
Skin to skin in the early-morning light.
After a moment, she turned around to face him, tilted her head until they were looking straight into each other’s eyes.
She used her fingers to trace the lines and contours of his face before settling on his lips and kissing him until he felt deliciously dizzy.
When they pulled apart, he felt words he couldn’t say rise to the tip of his tongue.
Stay, we could make it work, I’ve wanted this since the night we met.
He wanted to run his fingers through her hair, sleep in late, and spend all the time he possibly could with her.
But after a few seconds, she pulled away, got out of bed, and headed to the bathroom.
When he heard the sound of the shower turn on, he rolled out of bed and put on some clothes.
He walked across the room, and opened the curtains, letting the golden early-morning light fill the room.
Drew knew he was in trouble. There was no going back from a feeling this real.
He wanted to honor the rules of their arrangement and convince himself he could still play pretend.
But there was nothing fake about the way he felt about her anymore.
He wasn’t sure his feelings for her had ever been anything less than completely real.
He was trying to find the words to tell her he couldn’t pretend to be her boyfriend anymore when the bathroom door opened, releasing a cloud of minty shower gel–scented steam and Ari wrapped in a teeny-tiny towel.
She looked perfect. Like what were they doing getting dressed up to start the day when she looked that good perfect.
He’d seen her body only once, but it would probably be imprinted on his mind for the rest of his life.
By the time his gaze returned to her eyes, there was a little smirk on her face.
She could tell he’d been checking her out. But then her face turned serious.
“We have a problem,” she said. He was slightly alarmed by her tone.
“Are you okay?” he asked, his mind immediately running to worst-case scenarios. But she shook her head and smiled.
“Wearing last night’s dress while trekking through the snow the morning after isn’t my vibe. Especially in a hotel full of journalists. Do you have anything I can borrow?” she asked.
He got up and walked over to his wardrobe.
“I could lend you a Team USA hoodie,” he said with a smile as he walked to his wardrobe and pulled a hanger.
“The girls would kick me off of the team if I showed up to practice in that,” she said, shaking her head.
“A Team USA T-shirt?” he joked.
“They would revoke my citizenship,” Ari said, laughing as she walked over to search the wardrobe with him. She was still so fresh out of the shower that he could see the steam evaporating off her skin and small droplets of water rolling down her shoulders.
“How about this?” she asked, pulling out one of his old USC sweaters.
“You can take this too,” he said, handing her a fresh pair of tracksuit bottoms before going to the bathroom to brush his teeth for four minutes longer than he needed to give her space to change.
“Okay, I’m ready. Ta-da!” she said when Drew knocked on the door and came back out.
He was greeted by the sight of her spinning around and waving her hands in the air while wearing his clothes.
Everything was too big, but it suited her perfectly.
For a moment, he imagined what would have become of them if she’d gone to college in California.
If he’d met her for the first time on campus wearing that same red hoodie.
All the alternate realities flashed in his mind for a moment.
All the lives in which they’d met sooner and didn’t live on different sides of the world.
She was still here, just a few yards away from him, but he could already imagine how much he would miss her once this all ended.
“Are you okay?” she asked in amusement, no doubt catching the faraway expression on his face.
He wasn’t okay, but he nodded anyway. It was a violation of their most important rule, but he couldn’t tell her the truth without the risk of coming on too strong.
She gave him a funny look, as if she didn’t quite believe him, and then began to walk around the room, picking up her scattered belongings.
“I’ve got to dash. I need to listen to two chapters of this book before training,” she said as she collected the clothes that had gotten lost last night and put them in her bag.
“I could come. We could get breakfast,” he began. He could hear the earnestness in his voice. It had been about a week, and he was already down bad.
“Drew,” she said softly, looking over at him. She didn’t need to say anything else for him to know she wanted to just let things stay as they were. He nodded. It would be foolish to try and make it last.
“I’ll see you around,” she said, putting on her shoes and coat. She left the room before either of them could change their minds.
Drew flopped back on his bed and stared at the ceiling, realizing he was in trouble.
Because Drew was falling for a woman he would know for only a few more days.
Someone his sister hated who lived a whole ocean away.
It was supposed to be a relationship with a clear expiration date, doomed to end before it could begin.
But as he sat up, looked through the window, and watched the golden early-morning light cast its rays against the snow, he couldn’t help but smile.
He shook his head and laughed. This was definitely going to hurt.