Chapter 22
On the day of the picnic, Derek saw Linney head out for her daily paddle. The weather was glorious—perfect for the surprise birthday celebrations—without a cloud in the sky. Ivy had pestered him all morning, so after lunch, he finally gave in and picked up his phone.
Would you like a helper? Ivy wants to cook with you and I have some errands to run.
Send her over—door is open!
Derek had gotten awfully used to having his best friend next door. He watched his daughter skip across the lawn and up onto the porch, and a lump formed in his throat. He wasn’t the only one who would miss Linney when she went back to Damascus in a week. Shaking it off, he called out to Leo, who climbed into the car with him and they headed into town. They picked up ice for the cooler, juice for the kids, and some pop for the adults. Then they headed to the beer store.
“Daddy, what’s Auntie Linney making?” Leo tugged on Derek’s hand as he paid for the beer and coolers.
“Salad, I think. And maybe something from Syria. Why?”
“She makes yummy things.”
Derek nodded, amused at the innocent, but honest, assessment of his culinary skills.
“Do you think she’ll make apple crumble?”
“You can ask her when we get home, okay?”
That satisfied Leo and they packed up the car and headed back. Derek put the drinks in the fridge and the ice in the freezer before he and his son went to Linney’s.
“Knock, knock,” he called out, rapping on her screen door and then opening it.
“In the kitchen,” he heard Linney reply.
She’d made falafel, and Ivy was scooping watermelon with a melon baller, to make salad with feta and mint. Linney had sliced apples and now was making crumble topping.
“Your daughter’s going to need a dip in the lake before we go.”
Derek had to press his lips together to keep from laughing. The kitchen was a mess. Ivy was sticky and pink from the watermelon juice dripping down her shirt—and her face. Beside her, Linney stood in front of her stand mixer . Several strands of hair had escaped from her ponytail and were now hanging down on each side of her face. She looked like she’d had quite an afternoon.
“She’s not the only one,” he joked, using his thumb to wipe flour from her cheek.
Linney flushed. “I’m … I’m not used to having so much help in the kitchen.” She made air quotes around the word help.
“Is that for crumble?” he asked, hopefully pointing at the mixing bowl.
She nodded and Leo cheered. She knew it was a favourite of both father and son, so of course it was on the menu.
Derek took charge. “Okay, kids, let’s leave Auntie Linney to finish up, and we’ll see her at the picnic. Ivy, don’t touch anything!” he added as he picked his daughter up off the kitchen stool and set her on her feet. “You’re going right into the bath.”
* * *
When the kitchenwas finally clean, Linney changed into a sundress and put on mascara and a little bit of lipstick, probably the first time she’d worn makeup in the last five weeks. She left early so she could help Anna set up. Danny had found out about the party, but Emma and Gabby were still keeping him away so he wouldn’t see the decorations.
They were not quite finished when Kirsten pulled in with Will and Elise. Elise was a medical sales rep who Kirsten knew from the hospital. She had a large territory and travelled around it from her home base in Bridgegrove. She wore a sundress like Linney, but where Linney had hers paired with a pair of practical flat sandals, Elise wore three-inch espadrilles, and a face full of makeup. She brought an orchid for the host and was happy to sit in a lawn chair while the rest of them scurried around with last-minute preparations.
They heard a car in the driveway and quickly Emma and Gabby appeared. “Is everything ready?” Gabby asked. Receiving confirmation, she continued, “Okay, Dad, you can come back!”
Danny came through the house to rousing birthday greetings from family and guests. Anna delivered a beer and a kiss.
“Derek and the kids?” he asked his wife, knowing they were meant to be there.
“I’m sure they’ll be here soon. You remember how we were always late when the girls were young,” she reminded him. “And there were two of us!”
Soon enough, the last guests arrived. “Sorry, everyone,” apologized Derek. “We had a temper tantrum to deal with.” Leo’s sulking face made it clear who his father meant. “But we’re here now. Happy Birthday, Danny!” He gave him a clap on the back and looked around, his eyes stopping on the man and woman sitting next to Kirsten. He let go of his children’s hands, getting ready to meet the unfamiliar guests. Ivy made a beeline for Linney and Leo dropped to the ground melodramatically.
Linney jumped up to make introductions. “Derek, this is Kirsten’s friend Will. And this is Elise.”
“Good to meet you both,” he said, shaking hands.
“Elise works in medicine, Linney continued. “I’ll get you a drink and you two can get to know each other.” For a fraction of a second, Linney saw the equivalent of a thunderstorm in Derek’s eyes, but he recovered and started making forced small talk.
* * *
He was tryingto be friendly with Elise. He honestly was. It wasn’t her fault she was here, but Derek was beyond furious that Linney was setting him up, at Danny’s birthday party of all places. She was trying to foist a woman on him when he’d been abundantly clear to all of them he had no interest in dating.
“Thank you,” he said through gritted teeth when Linney returned with the cold drinks. There was no way she couldn’t know he was annoyed at her.
Before too long, Anna fired up the barbecue and soon hotdogs, hamburgers, and corn were on the grill. Leo joined Gabby on the swings, but Ivy wanted to stay where she was. It wasn’t lost on Derek that it was in Linney’s lap his shy daughter was opting to find comfort, with all the barbecue activity.
It turned out Elise liked her beer and was on her third before the food was ready. She was getting loud and had touched his arm one too many times for his liking. Ivy hadn’t left Linney’s lap. This was going to be a problem in a week when Linney left again. His head felt like a band was being tightened around it.
The day went from bad to worse when Leo tripped and skinned his knees, howling as blood dripped down his dusty shins.
“Excuse me,” Derek said to Elise. “I’d better deal with this.” He scooped up a wailing Leo and took him into the house.
Kirsten followed behind him. She wanted to make sure it was just a scrape and nothing more serious. She found the pair in the powder room, Leo sitting beside the sink with his Dad pressing damp washcloths on each knee. “Everything okay?” she asked. “Can I help?”
Derek didn’t turn around. “Leo’s fine. We don’t need any more help today, thank you very much.” His voice was tense. He wasn’t going to let any of them off the hook.
“We just thought?—”
“None of you thought. I said no. More than once.”
“But—”
“But nothing. Go back out there and just let me take care of my son.”
Kirsten rejoined the picnic where people were loading plates with food. Everything smelled delicious, and she was going to join the line when she realized Linney was sitting off to the side with Ivy.
“Everything alright?”
“She says she doesn’t feel well, and I think she might be a bit warm.”
Kirsten lay her hand on Ivy’s forehead. “Hmmm. You might be right. But for now, if she’s happy with you, let her stay there. I’ll get you some food.” She knelt beside Ivy. “Do you want something to eat?” Ivy shook her head.
Linney hummed to the little girl while stroking her hair. Suddenly, Derek appeared in front of her.
“Come on, Ivy, let’s get some supper.” Ivy shook her head again. “Ivy, I’m sure Auntie Linney wants to eat too.”
“It’s fine, Derek. Kirsten’s getting me something.”
“No, you go and eat. She’s my daughter.” He picked Ivy up and set her on her feet, taking her hand and leading both children to the food tables.
“Daddy, I feel icky.” Derek turned his head just in time to see his daughter throw up on the grass.
People sprang into action. Anna took Leo off to get food and to distract him. Kirsten, who was closest to the kitchen got a wet cloth, while Linney tried to console Ivy, who was crying now. Danny brought her some water to drink.
“Well, folks, I guess my evening is over,” Derek said, his voice tight and clipped. “Elise, I’m sorry for this. It was good to meet you.” He picked Ivy up and went to get Leo. “Danny, happy birthday, and my apologies for all the drama.”
“Do you want me to come with you?” Linney asked.
“I am perfectly capable of taking care of my family,” he said in a forced, formal tone. “You should stay and get better acquainted with the new folks.” And with that, he strode off.
Derek settled Leo in front of the television and put Ivy in the bath. He gave her some medicine and put her to bed. Heading downstairs, he apologized to Leo for having to leave. “I didn’t get any of Auntie Linney’s apple crumble,” the little boy whined. Ivy threw up twice more before midnight, and after Derek changed the bedsheets, he sat on the landing, head in his hands, emotionally exhausted from the day.
What had his friends been thinking? No woman wanted to deal with two young kids—look at what a disaster the day had been. Derek was angry with all of them. He didn’t want to open himself up to being hurt again. It was just too hard. And Linney, who they had all gotten used to being next door would be leaving soon.
* * *
“How’s Ivy?”Linney asked the next morning when she stopped by. Derek stood in the doorway with a tea towel over his shoulder and circles under his eyes. He didn’t move out of the way to let her in.
“Twenty-four-hour bug,” he said with a yawn. She’ll be fine.”
“Can I help with anything?”
“We’re good. I think today the three of us will just have a quiet day .”
“Oh.” Linney was a little hurt to be shut out when they’d spent so much time together. “Well, if you change your mind, I’m right next door.”
Derek nodded. “We’ll be fine. Thanks for coming by.” He closed the door.
To take her mind off the confusing frostiness she felt from Derek, Linney reluctantly started to think about work. She was well-rested now and full of ideas for stories she wanted to pitch when she got back. She went into town and picked up several little gifts for Hassan’s son from the dollar store and some locally-made lavender soap for his wife.
Her vacation was hurtling to a close and she really felt it when she handed a cheque over to Danny for the renovations.
There was one last dinner for Derek and the kids, including all their favourites. “I’ll give your dad the recipe for apple crumble,” she promised Leo, and she read Ivy three stories before bed. “I’m going to miss you guys so much,” she told them both and showed them where she was going on a map. “Promise me we’ll do video chats so you don’t forget who I am.” She turned her attention to Derek. “I have to go and finish packing. You’ll come over after they’re asleep?” He nodded.
Derek knocked on her door an hour later. “I can’t believe you won’t be here tomorrow,” he said, taking a mug of hot chocolate as they settled themselves on the porch swing.
“I know. The time has gone by so fast. Too fast. I’m starting to understand why you’re so happy here. And yet …”
“And yet what?”
Linney shifted in her seat, tucked her hair behind her ear, and made one last attempt. “I know you were angry when we tried to set you up. But, Derek, I say this as your friend. You can’t sit here every night by yourself. You?—”
“Enough, Linney,” he exploded at her. “I’ll date when I’m good and ready. Whenever that is. But it’s not now.” Derek yanked at the neck of his T-shirt. It suddenly felt like too tight.
“Come on. You’re stuck. It’s time,” she shot back, her voice rising. She needed to make the point to push Derek out of his comfort zone. “You’re acting like a monk. You’re hiding. You can’t live like this, with just the kids for company! You need someone. They need someone.” Linney held her breath. Had she gone too far?
Derek turned purple and Linney could see the veins in his neck.
“Do not bring my kids into this. I live for those kids. I have turned my life inside out for those kids. It isn’t easy being a single father.” He slammed his mug on the table and hot chocolate sloshed out, leaving a sticky mess as he continued, his temper getting the better of him. “And you’re one to talk. You date guys old enough to be your father, and Ernst is no closer to being there for you than Mac was. So don’t be lecturing me!”
The chair legs scraped on the floor of the porch as Derek stood up suddenly, grabbing the baby monitor and striding down the steps. At the bottom, he turned around. “And speaking of my kids, I need to get home to them. Have a good flight. I don’t want to talk about this ever again!”
Linney just sat there. She knew she’d been pushing, but she never expected Derek would react like that. She was angry and hurt by his attack on her too. It hit closer to home than he knew. She tossed and turned that night, uncomfortable with what they’d both said. When she got up in the morning, the car was gone from Derek’s driveway. She left goodbye notes for the kids on his porch and texted him before she left Silver Lake and again from the airport, but she got no reply.
* * *
Derek fumedfor weeks about the way he and Linney parted, but he couldn’t bring himself to apologize. But after one of his monthly sessions with Dr. Aslan—he’d continued therapy when he moved to Silver Lake— he finally conceded that maybe she had a point. When school started, Ivy joined Leo at the local primary school. She was in junior kindergarten, the smallest one in her class. Leo, a year ahead, looked after her in much the same way his father had looked after Linney.
“So maybe she was right,” Derek told Danny sheepishly, at lunch a few days later. It had been a while since they’d talked and between the harshness of Linney’s words, and Dr. Aslan’s gentle probing, he was finally starting to admit he was lonely. There was a hole in his life that he was almost ready to think about filling. “If you have anyone in mind, you can introduce us. Just don’t say anything to Linney.”
“You really should end this silence between you.” Danny was well aware from his wife that they weren’t speaking.
“She pushed too hard, and at the wrong time.”
“She just has your best interests at heart. We all do.”
Kirsten set Derek up with a locum doctor who had come to Silver Lake to take over while one of the emergency room doctors spent a year with Doctors Without Borders. Misty wore suits with tight pencil skirts and high heels that made her a little exotic for Silver Lake. She and Olivia were cut from the same cloth, so Kirsten thought Derek would like her.
They met for dinner after her shift at the hospital. Emma was babysitting. Derek couldn’t believe how loud his heart was thumping as he waited for his date to arrive. It was ridiculous to be so nervous. When she approached the table, he stood up and took her coat. Kirsten had good taste, he had to admit that. He could appreciate Misty’s good figure and expensive salon hair. She’d worn high heels and a pair of expensive-looking black pants. An emerald green sweater with a deep v showed off her assets.
Derek ordered a glass of red wine and she did the same. He soon learned that Misty could carry on conversation enough for both of them. When she did stop long enough to let him speak, she laughed at his jokes and it was clear she was enjoying the date. He wasn’t sure if he was, but he’d promised Kirsten he’d try.
“Oh, Derek,” she breathed, placing one dainty hand on his chest as they said goodnight at the door. He was surprised by the touch.
He gave her a chaste kiss. “Thank you for a lovely evening.”
“I had a good time, Derek. I hope we can do it again sometime soon.”
He felt flustered and wasn’t quite sure what to say. “Umm. Sure. I’ll give you a call.”
The next morning, Danny dropped by the law office with a pair of double doubles. Sitting opposite Derek, he took a swig of his sweet milky coffee.
When Derek didn’t offer information, he came out and asked. “So, how was the date?” Derek raised one eyebrow but said no more. “Come on!” Danny cajoled.
“Let’s just say it wasn’t as easy as I remember.”
“How hard could it be? Kirsten wouldn’t set you up with someone bad. Pretty woman, good conversation.” His eyes twinkled as he added, “A hot kiss at the end of the night, maybe?”
Derek rolled his eyes. “Okay, she was pretty. Great career. Laughed a lot.”
“And?”
“And nothing. It just felt weird. The last woman I was with was my wife. And we all know how that turned out.”.
“They’re not all going to be like Olivia. Give this one—Misty, right? — another chance. What do you have to lose?”
“We’ll see,” Derek replied unenthusiastically.
“I’m going to hold you to that,” Danny said, standing up. “Gotta run. The Henderson house won’t build itself.” He turned to go, throwing his parting words over his shoulder. “Derek? I’m glad you’re getting out there.”
Surprisingly, Derek and Misty did go out on another date—three more, in fact, and he did kiss her several times. But he felt nothing, and he didn’t want to lead her on.
“It’s been fun,” she said when he told her. “But I’m not surprised. I could never live full time in a place as small as Silver Lake and I’m not sure you can live anywhere else. I hope you find someone here one day.” She reached up and kissed him then turned and left him sitting in the bar. Derek ordered a beer. Misty hadn’t been right for him, but at least he’d gotten his feet wet. He wouldn’t be so quick to shut down the idea again.
Christmas came and went but the longer he and Linney didn’t connect, the harder it was for Derek to pick up the phone. Even texting felt wrong now. Derek’s mood was as grey as the weather. Silver Lake had several blizzards and everyone was suffering from cabin fever. The schools were closed for several days because of the storms.
Leo lost his first tooth that spring and another soon afterwards. Derek almost picked up his phone to send Linney a picture of his gap-toothed smile. But he couldn’t. It had been too long. Surprisingly, Ivy lost her first one just a few months later and he tooth fairy began making regular visits to the Blake household.
One evening, after Derek tucked a loonie under Leo’s pillow, he turned the TV on and started flipping through the channels. When he reached TCN, he stopped and leaned forward when he heard a familiar voice talking over pictures of a refugee camp.
Linney’s face appeared on screen to wrap up the story. She looked tired, Derek thought, as he scrutinized her face. He knew she wore makeup to cover dark circles under her eyes, but he knew her so well, he could still tell. It was in her voice and her eyes too. It must be difficult over in Syria.
“For TCN News, I’m Linney MacDonnell, in Aleppo.”
Derek’s eyebrows raised. So not Damascus. He wondered how long she’d been there. He hoped she was safe.
The news anchor introduced the next story and Derek turned off the TV with the clicker—it hadn’t left his hands. He looked at his watch. The sun hadn’t come up yet over there. Too early to text. He wanted to wait until Linney would be able to reply. Tomorrow or the next day. They’d reconnect and he would apologize. And then everything would be right again.