Chapter 29
Never Had A Choice
? Slow Dance in Headlights - MaRynn Taylor
Ruby
Araindrop hits the windshield as the first tear falls. I rub my hand over my heart in hopes that it might ease the hollow ache in my chest, but it doesn’t. I know it won’t.
Another mile marker passes in my rearview. The sky opens up and rain pelts down against my truck in a heart-wrenching symphony. The pain grows the longer I drive.
I think back over the last few months with Liam, every quiet moment and reverent touch. For a short while, the dreams I’ve had for so long felt real and tangible.
I’ve fallen impossibly deeper in love with this man, despite his reluctance to open his heart. He knows me, inside and out, and has for a long time. For the life of me, I can’t figure out why I didn’t see this coming.
His words still echo in my mind like a phantom pain, but it’s not what he said that holds the answers; it’s what he didn’t say.
“I’m not good for you,” he had said.
The truth lurked just beneath the surface, buried under the hurt and pain he keeps hidden from the world—but not from me. “I’m not good enough for you.”
If he could see himself through my eyes, maybe he wouldn’t be so quick to cast aside everything we’ve cultivated together—this beautiful life we could have if he’d give in to it.
When I’m outside the ranch gate, something inside me snaps—the final thread keeping me from running back to him.
It’s not the hurt or distance that makes me turn the truck around; it’s the realization that I broke a promise I made to myself. I said I would choose Liam every day if that’s what it takes, and at the first sign of trouble, I ran.
Liam’s spent most of his life putting everyone else first—it’s why he all but shoved me out the door. He thought he was protecting me, but I don’t need protecting. I need him.
He’s letting his past come between us, and I can’t allow that.
“Where do you wanna go, Goldie?”
Home.
Hope blooms in my chest as I approach my destination—closer to the man I love wholeheartedly and without reservation.
My pulse races. I turn onto the side road and make my way up the driveway. I’ve been gone for less than fifteen minutes, but it feels like hours.
I put Dolly in park and rush up the cobblestone walkway.
The rain pours down as I step onto the stoop, drenched from head to toe.
I don’t know how long I stand there, water droplets and tears mingling, and cold water seeping through my clothing.
Headlights illuminate the brick facade as Liam pulls his truck into the drive, making me feel like an utter fool for not noticing its absence in the first place.
His boots splash in the wet earth as he steps out into the storm. “What are you doing, Ruby?” His voice is strained, and I don’t have to look up to know his restraint is paper-thin. “Come inside.”
“No.” If I had any self-preservation, I would listen, but I’m nothing if not stubborn. My entire body shakes as the cool air hits my damp skin. “I’m here for you, Liam.”
His hands flex at his sides like he wants to reach for me. He doesn't. Instead, he crosses his arms over his chest and studies my mascara-streaked face. “I told you, I can’t give you what you need.”
For the first time, my confidence falters. I blow out a heavy breath before I speak. “Don’t I get a choice in that?”
He takes a tentative step in my direction, then another until we’re less than a foot apart. My stomach dips as he reaches for me, but he pulls back before closing the distance.
His hand flexes at his side. “You would choose me?”
I finally meet his hopeful eyes, and something like longing pierces my chest. My forehead creases as I place a hand over his heart.
We’re both soaked through. It’s not the rain or the cold that has me trembling now, but my body’s visceral reaction to the rapid beating of his heart in perfect time with my own, like we’re two halves of a whole. “Every time, Liam. Don’t you see that?”
He reaches up to brush my wet hair away from my forehead, gently gliding his fingers along my cheek. I lean into his touch, savoring it like it could be my last.
“Why?”
“I’ve always had a team of people deciding everything for me: the label, my agent, my manager, the press.
I can’t even put on a pair of shoes without someone’s unwanted opinion.
But this?” I place his hand over my heart.
“This still belongs to me. Except it doesn’t because I gave it to you years ago and you didn’t even notice.
” I scream the last sentence, letting every ounce of pain radiate through me.
A crack of thunder reverberates through me, but it’s got nothing on the intensity of Liam’s gaze. My chest heaves with each ragged inhale.
He doesn’t speak. I had hoped he would hear my words and ask me to stay, but my faith wanes with each passing moment, each lingering touch, and each stuttered breath.
He shakes his head. My hope shatters.
I open my mouth to speak, but nothing comes out. I don’t want to be this weak girl begging to be loved. That’s not who I am—or maybe it is, and I just needed the right person to break my heart.
I let his hand drop and take one measured step back. When I look up, his expression is a mix of awe and indecision.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn't have come back.” I turn to leave, but he grabs my wrist to stop me.
I don’t dare move. He skates his thumb along my pulse point. Can he feel how hard my heart is beating?
“Goddamnit, Ruby. It’s impossible to do the right thing with you.” He’s on me like a shot, lifting me into his arms and shoving my back against the truck as he crushes his mouth to mine.
It’s not a soft kiss—it’s messy and passionate, and I want to fucking drown in it. The rain continues its assault, but I’m too caught up in Liam to care. I can’t tell if the goose bumps are from the cold or the man who is so thoroughly devouring me.
I pull back, gazing into the vibrant green depths that have held me captive from the moment I laid eyes on him.
Breathless, he brings our foreheads together. “I was too busy giving you my heart to notice I was already holding yours. I won’t make the same mistake twice.”
I palm his cheek, reveling in the sense of rightness I feel when I’m with him.
“That heart is the reason I fell in love with you in the first place. Your protectiveness, your willingness to put others before yourself. But there has to be a line, Liam. You can’t safeguard the world at the expense of your own happiness.
And that happiness… it’s inextricably linked to mine, now.
Your burdens are my burdens. I know you pushed me away out of some misplaced sense of guilt, but I won’t let it happen.
This thing we’ve built, it’s worth fighting for. ”
He kisses me again, but this time it’s slow and deliberate. My hands slide into his hair as I cling to him like I might die if I let go, and he holds me much the same.
When my feet finally touch solid ground again, and we regain some sense of composure, I wrap my arms behind his neck in the glow of the headlights.
“Dance with me,” I whisper.
“Here? Now? It’s pouring.”
“I’ve always wanted to dance in the rain with the man I love.”
Liam effortlessly twirls me under his arm and dips me backward. I squeal at the sudden movement, worried he might drop me, but when I look up into his eyes, I know without a shadow of a doubt he’d never let me fall.
He tugs me upright and wraps his arms around my back, swaying. “I’ve always wanted to be the man you love.”
“I do love you, Liam.”
“God, you have no idea what it’s like to finally hear those words.”
I smile. “Yes. I do.”
“I love you so fucking much.” He kisses me again. Softly. Deeply. Breathlessly.
We’re completely soaked through by the time we make it inside. Thankfully, no one's home, so we strip out of our clothes right there in the entryway.
Liam looks at me like he wants to eat me alive, and I can’t say I’m opposed to the idea, but my body is covered in goose bumps, and I’m shivering uncontrollably.
He lifts me into his arms bridal style and carries me up the stairs, depositing me in front of the sink. I glance at the tub longingly, but Liam shakes his head. “Next time. We need to warm you up.”
He starts the water and checks the temperature. Once he’s satisfied, he guides me under the hot spray and wraps me in his arms as the water washes away what little doubt remains between us.
“Say it again,” I whisper.
He sweeps the wet hair away from my forehead and trails his fingertips down my face until his palm tenderly cradles my cheek. His eyes meet mine. “I love you, Ruby. I’ve loved you for a decade. I’ll love you for a lifetime if you’ll let me.”
I lean into his touch and place my palm over his heart. “If I let you? What if I say no?”
“Then I’ll love you anyway. I don’t think I ever really had a choice.”