Chapter Three #2
Tip paced away. He moved to pet Artem’s horse, Ginger. “He went to spend the night with Jathan and get wine drunk. You’ve worked for me a long time.”
It really was as bad as Quince suspected. He couldn’t lose this job. This was his home. He literally lived on property and had made this job his life. “Twelve years.”
“In all those years, I never once suspected I’d hired a homophobe. I’ll give you that.”
Yep. He was fucked. “You didn’t.”
Tip looked his way and held Quince’s stare.
Quince refused to look away. “You didn’t.”
Tip chose a spot and sat across from him. “Then what in the fuck is going in, because I got to tell you, Quince, Jathan is one of the nicest people on the planet. Being mean to him is like kicking a puppy. Why in the fuck would you say that shit to him?”
Quince took a breath. He didn’t know where to start.
Tip obviously took his hesitation as him searching for a lie. “I need you to be honest with me. If Jathan feels like he can’t come here, then I’ll be dealing with more of this—sleeping alone. I much prefer Jathan come to Artem. If he won’t because of you, then I have some thinking to do.”
There it was. His job was on the line. Quince couldn’t be a bitch. “I like him.”
Tip looked as if he waited for more, and it hit Quince. He didn’t know what Quince meant.
“I like him, like him.”
Tip sat back. “Huh. Okay. Were you one of those kids that pulled people’s hair when you had a crush?”
Despite the seriousness of the situation, Quince laughed.
“No. Believe it or not, I didn’t have much interest in anyone until I was like sixteen.
But no, I’m not the type to act like this.
I’ve never dated a guy. This has got me a little fucked up, but I tried to talk to him again before he left, so I could apologize and explain.
He wouldn’t talk to me. Not that I know if I can explain what even I don’t understand.
” Quince swiped his hand over his face. Aggravation rose inside him, making everything feel overwhelming and pissing him off.
“And you know what, if I had anywhere else to go, I’d walk away from this job right now.
I’ve worked my ass off for you for twelve years and you’re really ready to fire me over one thing.
That’s bullshit. I thought we were friends. ”
“I didn’t say that. In fact, I can’t think of many things you could do to make me fire you. This is your home. You’re more than a friend. You’re like family to me. I only meant I might have to find a way to guarantee you’re nowhere nearby when Jathan stops by.”
Quince’s shoulders dropped. It had truly been the worst day.
“I really don’t know how to fix this. There’s a reason I live out here and barely have anything to do with anyone.
I’m not good at this part of life. Part of me thinks that’s exactly what I should do.
I should just make myself scarce when he comes to visit and let it be.
The rest of me really wants to say I’m sorry. ”
“Text him.”
Quince blinked. He felt a little stupid. Jathan’s number was in his phone. Texting was so much easier than talking. He could just text him. “Yeah. Okay. I’ll try. Hopefully, he’ll accept my apology, and—at the very least—be okay with coming back out here for Artem.”
Tip stood. “I’ll leave you to do that. No doubt Artem will let me know how it goes.”
A snort burst from Quince. “I’m sure.”
“Good luck.” Tip flashed him a smile and headed out, leaving Quince to figure it out.
Quince pulled out his phone and stared at Jathan’s name. He didn’t want to do this here. Quince made his way to his truck and quickly drove around the property to his place. Once there, he decided to shower first. Only when he couldn’t avoid it any longer did Quince start typing.
Quince: So, turns out I might be a little gay.
Since the other night, I’ve had thoughts about you I’ve never had about a guy.
Too late, I realized how incredibly ridiculous my reaction was to realizing how you make me feel.
I feel so dumb. First off, you didn’t deserve any of that shit and I’m sorry.
No excuses. I’m just sorry. Secondly, how stupid am I thinking someone like you would even think about someone like me in that light?
I can’t fucking believe I automatically acted like you’d want me just because you were nice to me.
Jesus. The more I type, the more I realize you shouldn’t ever talk to me again.
I deserve your hatred. Before you block my number, just let me say I’m sorry.
Being with you was the most fun I’ve had in well over a decade.
I’m fully aware this is my loss. Good luck with the rest of the playoffs and have a great life, I guess.
Quince read the text four times before hitting send.
He knew he had said too much, but he also couldn’t think of what to cut out.
Jathan deserved a thousand-word essay on how much Quince regretted losing a friend.
If he had one defense, it was that he had always been a terrible judge of character.
It made sense he would ruin something good.
Quince headed for the bedroom. He plugged his phone in and set it on the bedside table before he stripped down to his underwear.
After climbing into bed, he stared at the ceiling.
Maybe he should have said more. He could have confessed to a million things.
Nothing changed anything, though. He’d had a shot at some level of happiness and blown it.
Maybe he should take Carey back after all.
He couldn’t say she was wrong for cheating on him.
What did he have to offer at the end of the day? Nothing.
His phone buzzed.
Quince’s gaze slid toward the device. A loud, annoyed sigh burst from Quince.
It was always like conjuring up the devil with Carey.
He had dumped her a million times and taken her back every time, so it was fair for her to think he would do it again.
It wasn’t like he felt anything for her anyhow beyond the fact that she was familiar.
She was someone he didn’t have to work for.
He snagged the phone. In no universe did he expect to see Jathan’s name, but there it was.
His hands shook as he opened the message.
Jathan: Can I call?
Well, shit. So much for texting being easier.
Quince: Yes.
His phone rang almost immediately. He took a steadying breath before answering. “Hello?”
“Hey.”
“Hey.”
Silence dragged between them. Still, Quince felt better knowing Jathan was on the other end of the line.
“So, I’m a little drunk. I apologize now if I say anything totally dumb.”
A smile exploded across Quince’s face. “I kind of like that about you. Everyone is pretty serious around me all the time. I thought you didn’t drink.”
“I don’t. It didn’t take much to get me here.
” Jathan paused. He heard Jathan blow out a sigh.
“So here’s the thing. When I asked you to dinner the other night, I really kind of meant the offer as a date.
But then I got worried you didn’t see it that way, so I decided to pull back and just accept whatever because I really don’t have any friends, so that was good too.
Does that make any sense, or am I just rambling? I feel like I’m rambling.”
Just like that night, Quince hadn’t stopped grinning like an idiot from the moment Jathan started talking.
“I get what you’re saying. When I left, I couldn’t stop smiling, thinking about how much fun I had and how great you are.
I don’t really have friends either, so I was ridiculously excited.
But then I started looking way too closely at things and I realized I wanted more.
Then I panicked, and I always fuck things up when that happens.
I guess my point is, I genuinely like you a lot.
If we can be friends, then I really want that. ”
“What if I want more?”
God. He would not be a fucking coward and regret it for the rest of his life. “Then I really want that too, but I’ll take whichever you choose because I was serious. I’ve never been happier than I was the other night. You’re really amazing. I loved spending time with you.”
Another bout of silence fell between them. He might have thought their call had dropped if he didn’t hear Jathan moving around.
“So, what are you wearing?”
A bark of laughter burst from Quince. Lord, he was so much fun. “Sorry. I just got a sudden image of Artem sitting there, listening in horror.”
Jathan laughed. It was a sexy sound. “Nah. I ended up drinking his wine. Since he was sober when I got your text, he decided to go home. I’m surprised he lasted as long as he did. He wouldn’t do well sleeping away from Tip.”
It was a little horrific thinking about Artem reading his text alongside Jathan, but whatever. At this point, he had already humiliated himself all over the place. “Yeah. Even if he’d gotten drunk, Tip probably would’ve come to get him. He doesn’t like to share.”
A sexy chuckle caressed his ear through the phone. “You never said what you’re wearing. Was that intentional?”
Damn. Now that he had Jathan talking sexy in his ear, things didn’t feel that strange after all. He was an adult. Quince wanted what he wanted. He wouldn’t back down. “No. I just got into bed before I got your text, so I’m in my underwear.”
“Wow. You meant it. You’re really willing to go past friendship.”
Quince smirked. Now he felt like the man he truly was. He wasn’t weak. “If you’ll actually go for someone old like me, then hell yeah. What are you wearing?”
Jathan’s laughter was everything. “Sadly, I’m fully dressed. The room is spinning quite a bit. I really hate drinking.”
“Keep one foot on the floor.”
“Solid advice.” Jathan sounded tired. “I gave my court-side tickets to Artem and Tip.”
“How are you getting to the game?”
“It’s not that far, so I’m driving.”
Quince felt good on the inside. Warm. He didn’t care about any fucking tickets. “Then you can celebrate with me after you win.”
“I’d like that.”
“It’s sounds like you’re falling asleep on me.”
“That sounds nice.” He honestly sounded half asleep. “You have a great chest. I bet it makes an amazing pillow.”
“You should find out sometime. Right now, you need to go to bed before you pass out. We can talk tomorrow.” When Jathan was sober. He hoped Jathan remembered this and didn’t wake up still finished with him.
“Okay. Quince?”
Quince smiled. It sounded in the voice. “Yeah?”
“I’m glad you’re still my friend.”
He still hoped to be more. “Me too.”
“Goodnight.”
Quince really didn’t want to hang up. “Goodnight.” With nothing left to do, Quince hit end. For much longer than he cared to admit, Quince held his phone and stared at the ceiling. It had been a day. For the first time in a long time, he couldn’t wait to see what happened tomorrow.