Chapter 5 #2
“Help!” I yelled, although if Tom hadn’t opened the door, maybe that was because he’d been caught and turned and was now one of the deteriorating creatures like the ones before me.
Was I really going to die like this? I couldn’t have an unresolved marital issue hanging over me before I died. I hadn’t told Hazen that I loved him.
A zombie lunged at me with snapping teeth, but he was still five feet away, so I just flinched back and bumped into the steel door. It was a very solid door.
A black figure in a rippling coat dropped down from above me, landing in a fancy crouch to my left. She raised her head and then gave me a smile that showed her fangs. Her dark hair was slicked back, and her all-black shiny outfit was like cyber vampire.
I screamed and stumbled away from her, then lurched back from zombie grasping hands. “No. There are no vampires, just zombies. Vampires don’t exist. There is no way my luck would be that bad.”
“You smell like you’ve been marked. They won’t ever stop hunting you now that you’ve gotten their attention.
Don’t worry. I’ll put you out of your misery once I clear some space for us.
” The vampire chick slashed me across my face with her claws, almost faster than I could see, before she drew a long, terrifying sword and walked into the crowd of monsters.
The witch had cut me! She’d said that she’d put me out of my misery.
Was there any way that I could sneak behind her and kill her?
How did you kill vampires? Garlic? Holy water?
I was wearing the tacky bejeweled cross.
I could throw it at the back of her head.
I watched her take out three zombies, trying to weigh my options, as though I had some of those, until a zombie was close enough to me that I could do what she did, stab right through the front lobe and then rip up with a twist so the head kind of exploded in the direction opposite me.
It toppled over, but kept jerking around.
Why didn’t they stop moving? Another monster came at me from the right, but the others seemed aimed at vampire chick, like they were fighting over the delicious prey.
That was me. Prey. I slashed off the zombie’s hand and then kicked him back into the still twitching one. At least the prey could bite back.
I yelled and slashed at another one, ripping through its body in a completely useless maneuver. It leapt at me and I fell back against the door. I grabbed the handle, using the leverage to kick it away from me, and felt the latch give in my hand. The door was open!
I yanked it open and fell inside, kicking the door closed before a loud thump hit it, probably the vampire considering its speed and velocity. Another thud hit the door and then BOOM.
The explosion rocked the building I was sprawled in, sending bits of plaster down on me. I coughed while heat shimmered in the air. He’d said that we’d start small, hadn’t he?
“Come on, Lucy. We’ll relax later,” Tom said, lifting me up by the armpits then pushing me ahead of him down a long creepy hall that rocked again as another explosion went off.
I veered towards the wall, but he was there to grab my arm and keep me going. I breathed through my mouth, half in shock, half in shock. I guess that was all in shock. I was all, one hundred percent, in shock.
“Vampire,” I gasped, gripping his sleeve.
“Good work getting her in the trap. I’ve been avoiding her for almost a decade. Actually, she’s one of the reasons I’ve curtailed slaying so much. With her out of the way, things will be much simpler.”
A crack and a thud brought a beam down in front of us, along with a large cloud of dust. He turned right at that corner, moving a little faster, but not like we were in any real danger.
“You didn’t tell me that there were vampires!”
“No? Well, they don’t mingle with zombies, so it wasn’t relevant until now.
I don’t suppose her disappearance will go unnoticed.
” He jerked me to a stop as another piece of the roof came down in front of me, then we went through a door to what may have been a cafeteria at one point.
Or a mental hospital. I wanted to go to a nice, safe, happy mental hospital.
It would be so great if all of this was insanity instead of my life.
Bring on the padded walls and the straight jackets.
Somehow, we made it through the falling-down building and out into the overgrown drive where he’d parked his van.
He took the time to walk me around and push me into the back where I could curl up in a ball and not breathe, before he got in on his side and pulled out.
He drove crazy, sending me rolling from side to side until he pulled out of the winding narrow roads in the old industrial district and onto the freeway.
He drove fast while I had a meltdown or two.
He turned on the radio to foreign ballad stuff I’d never heard before. It was great elevator music, calming, cool vibe like we were going to chill at a campfire.
I sat up and yelled at him. “What were you thinking? Start small! You said start small! And vampires! Don’t you think you should have mentioned the vampires?
I mean, I had no idea how to even think about defeating her!
And you didn’t mention multiple explosions!
You said fire! Also, there were so many zombies!
You said start small.” I whimpered that last bit and curled up in a ball while I sniffed.
“I admit that things did not go according to plan. It’s a good thing I had the secondary explosives put into place in case things went south.
The vamp, I caught sight of her in the building, so I stayed low until she went out.
Otherwise, we’d both be dead.” He chuckled like wouldn’t that make a good story?
“You’re insane.”
“No, it’s just that it’s been so long since I had anyone to talk to about any of this. It’s quite enjoyable. It reminds me of my youth, riding with my sister into the fray.”
“Your sister? What happened to her?”
“She got married, put the slaying behind her. She never had children and died of cancer.”
“That doesn’t sound so bad,” since I’d been expecting dying young of decapitation.
“Cancer is terrible.”
I couldn’t argue with that. “Right. Sorry. You said that you know this vampire, that she’s been keeping you from slaying, but you didn’t expect her to be there?”
“Oh, no. She should have been across the city. There shouldn’t have been that many zombies, either.
It’s your marking, I guess. I never knew anyone that was marked.
I heard of a few people, but they usually turned or died before very long.
It’s amazing how many zombies came out of the woodwork for you.
She must have been following them. She’s supposed to keep the deteriorating undead under control, so they don’t cause problems with society in general, but she hasn’t been doing anything but letting them get fat and happy on her watch.
Thus the high numbers. Maybe the grand master won’t care that she’s dead since she did such a bad job. ”
“The grand master?” This sounded slightly ominous.
“I don’t know everything about the vampire social structure, but there is a grand master who keeps the peace. He’s located in our city, has been for the last two decades. It’s a great honor, at least to the monsters.”
“Keeps the peace? How can a vampire keep the peace?”
“He controls everyone else so they don’t panic all the humans. It helps keep feeding easy. Vampires don’t usually kill their blood banks, not unless they’re feral.”
I exhaled a breath I’d been holding. The idea of vampires was too terrifying, but at the same time, if there was some kind of organized structure, it made it easier to handle.
I understood bureaucracy. “So, shiny lady was supposed to keep the zombie numbers down, but didn’t?
Shouldn’t the Grand Master have executed her or something? ”
“He’s busy with more interesting things. I mean, he delegates, so he doesn’t have to worry about small things like proliferating lesser zombies.”
“Tom, it makes no sense. Why did the zombie mark me in the first place? Why didn’t she just chomp my brains? How long did it take to mark me? It must have taken some time that would be better spent killing me.”
“Infecting. You’re marked for infection. Your mark would last after you were infected, which would offer you some protection, so that zombie wanted to keep you alive, or at least undead.”
I suddenly got a blinding headache. Maybe it was from the exploding building, but somehow I doubted it. “Why would a zombie want to keep anyone alive or undead? Am I like someone they wanted to adopt or use as a cook or something?”
“The zombie social structure is set up a lot more chaotically than the vampires, but someone somewhere must have ordered that you be marked. Maybe it’s because you were in my theater, and they thought you were me. A slayer zombie would be ironic. Maybe the zombie queen appreciates irony.”
I thumped my head on the van’s floor. “Zombie queen? So, can I go visit her and ask her to remove the marking?”
“If you knew where she was, and if you could get a meeting without getting killed, and if she’s capable of removing the marking, but those are a lot of ifs.”
“And the Grand Master? Would he be able to remove the marking?”
“Ah, Lucy, I love that you’re asking questions about that world, but that direction isn’t productive. The Grand Master is busy. He hates being disturbed from his busy work ruling the undead world. If you did get an audience with him, he’d probably torture you for bothering him.”
“But after he tortured me, maybe he’d give me a solution to my problem.”
“You’re thinking about him as an administrator, not a monster who thinks of you as a tasty snack. If he did like you, he could turn you into a vampire, which would probably solve the marking issue, but isn’t a long-term solution, or rather it is a very, very long-term solution, as in eternal.”
“What is a solution, Tom? Am I supposed to just continue slaying all the zombies until eventually they stop attacking me because they’re all dead?”
“Well, you wouldn’t end up a vampire, and it’s a pretty fun job.”
“No, Tom, that was not a fun job! That vampire chick cut my face!”
The tires screeched as he pulled over on the side of the road. He wasted no time climbing in back and pulling out the first aid kit I’d used to sew up his arm. He pulled out a bottle and opened it with his teeth then pounded it on his palm, only to frown at it in dismay.
“It’s all dried up. Last time she got me, she had poison on her claws. I don’t suppose that’s changed in ten years. I had to break into the Grand Master’s warehouse to get the antidote. I was out of it for a long time while I recovered. Had some crazy hallucinations. They weren’t the fun kind.”
I had no idea that there were fun kinds. You learn something every day. Like vampires. Zombies. Poisoned claws. “Seriously? Why would a vampire use poison? It’s overkill.”
“I think she secretes it. Yeah, overkill is right.”
“How dangerous is it to break into the Grand Master’s warehouse?”
“I don’t understand the question. If you get caught, it’s death. If you don’t get caught, it’s no problem.”
Seriously? I was going to kill him. “How hard is it to not get caught?”
“Well, if I caused a distraction, you should be able to sneak in and get it without too much trouble, because all the security would be dealing with me.” He handed me the bottle. “And you can replace it with this, so it’s not immediately noticeable that it was taken.”
“Or I could cause the distraction and you could steal it, since you know the layout.”
“To be blunt, I’ll be taken eventually, during which you need to find somewhere quiet and secure to hide while you take the antidote. Otherwise…” He drew his thumb across his throat and gave me a cheerful smile.
“What will they do to you?”
“I’m a human, so if I don’t act like I know that they’re monsters, I’ll be fine. If they follow their usual process, they’ll call the local police and have me taken in for vandalism.”
Great, so Tom was going to deface a vampire mogul’s building. No sweat. “What about the explosions? Aren’t they going to investigate that?”
“They’ll expect the vamp we blew up to check it.
Like I told you, that’s not where she was supposed to be.
We’ve got at least a few hours before they’re on their guard against renegade slayers.
Actually, even after they learn about the explosion, they’re not likely to blame it on me.
I’ve worked hard to keep a low profile. Mostly I haven’t been working hard, just keeping my neighborhood clean. ”
“Which is why I was attacked inside your theater.”
He nodded slowly. “That was weird. She must have tracked you from Gloria’s place.” He scowled and looked unhappy about the state of things for the first time. “I’ll have to check on her after I get out of jail.”
“If they don’t just drink all your blood and throw you in the river if they realize that you’re a slayer.”
He patted my hand and climbed back into the driver’s seat. “I’m one of the last of my kind. They’d probably put me in a museum before they killed me.”
“That does sound fun.” No, it didn’t, at least not to me.
Tom, on the other hand, seemed to have a too-casual attitude about near death situations, unless Gloria was involved.
That was interesting, but not interesting enough to distract me from my insane and reckless mission.
Still, my cheek was starting to throb, and I wasn’t looking forward to the hallucinations. Nutmeg was bad enough.