Chapter Thirty-Five
Ashley
I gathered up all the courage I could and made that phone call to Sloane.
He had a right to know he was going to have a daughter.
As I waited for him to come on the line, I was almost able to convince myself he’d hear my voice and instantly regret how he’d treated me. That he’d beg for forgiveness, and we’d raise Peanut together as a family.
Then the nurse came back with some lame story about him not being allowed to receive phone calls, and I was too embarrassed to argue. Instead, I just thanked her as the tears once again rolled down my cheeks.
I was never watching another fucking Hallmark movie again.
I’ll admit, my pride and my heart took another hit, and I almost said, “Screw it. You had your chance, buddy.”
But more important than my pride or Sloane having a right to know about his daughter, my little girl deserved to know her dad. I needed to at least make another attempt to contact him.
So, I reverted back to my trusted method of pen and paper. Only this time I wrote it on plain white copy paper, then put it in a plain envelope. I did put my return address on it, though. I wasn’t going to trick him into reading what I had to say. If he sent this letter back, I’d be able to say in good conscience that I tried.
Tammy noticed the envelope sitting on my counter when she brought over dinner that night.
“I thought you were going to call him?”
I gave her a weak smile. “He wouldn’t come to the phone.”
“He’s such an asshole,” my BFF scoffed.
I shrugged. It wasn’t like I could defend him. But there had been a time when he hadn’t been an asshole and had been quite wonderful. Sometimes that was harder to forget.
“You’re a better woman than I am,” she said as she opened up my refrigerator and took out a can of Sprite. “I’d say fuck him; he doesn’t deserve to know that baby girl.”
“Maybe not. But this way, it’s on him. I can say I did what I could to let him know about her.”
“I’d send that certified mail if I were you. That way he can’t come back five years from now and say you never told him, then try to fight you for custody.”
I hated that it’d come to this, but I knew she was right. There was no way I was going to risk losing my child, now or in the future.